


i'm okay because i met you.

by rapunzels, spider_eli



Series: Jacey New Girl AU [1]
Category: Dawson's Creek
Genre: ANYWAYS SHAN AND I ARE BIG BRAINED, AU, Gen, New Girl au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:48:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 83,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27891802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rapunzels/pseuds/rapunzels, https://archiveofourown.org/users/spider_eli/pseuds/spider_eli
Summary: “So, you know in horror movies when the girl’s like: “Oh my god, there’s something in the basement! Let me just run down there in my underwear and see what’s going on in the dark!” and you’re like “What is your problem? Call the police.” and she’s like “Okay!” but it’s too late, because she’s already getting murdered? Well, my story’s kind of like that.”Joey was just trying to do something nice for her boyfriend.//After a horrible breakup with her high school sweetheart Dawson, Joey moves in with Jack, Jen, and Pacey. In other words, a Dawson's Creek (primarily Jacey) AU inspired by New Girl.
Relationships: Audrey Liddell/Jen Lindley, Jack McPhee/Pacey Witter, Jen Lindley/Gretchen Witter, Jen Lindley/Jack McPhee, Jen Lindley/Joey Potter, Jen Lindley/Joey Potter/Pacey Witter, Jen Lindley/Pacey Witter, Joey Potter/Pacey Witter
Series: Jacey New Girl AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2042377
Comments: 33
Kudos: 70





	1. Who's That Girl?

**Author's Note:**

> this is what happens when i watch new girl to avoid writing jacey fanfiction. it just happens anyways.
> 
> thank you to shan for instantly running with the idea and agreeing to write this with me! this is totally a team effort to write so you should send a lot of love their way @spider_eli <3 -mars
> 
> i don't have notes tbh we're both just jacey trash -shan
> 
> // 
> 
> for this au, pacey never lived in cape side and his family is from new york, so he and jen are childhood friends. jen went and visited grams almost every summer, which is how she knows joey. she met jack (and andie) in college. also they all live in LA and are all around 21 at the beginning. 
> 
> bi pacey and lesbian jen rights <3
> 
> content warning for some nsfw stuff mentioned at the beginning, but nothing happens.
> 
> swearing throughout the series probably

_“So, you know in horror movies when the girl’s like: “Oh my god, there’s something in the basement! Let me just run down there in my underwear and see what’s going on in the dark!” and you’re like “What is your problem? Call the police.” and she’s like “Okay!” but it’s too late, because she’s already getting murdered? Well, my story’s kind of like that.”_

Joey was just trying to do something nice for her boyfriend.  
  
“I can’t believe you’re actually doing this,” Joey hears Audrey say on the phone. “Look at little Joey Potter, all grown up and sexy.”

“Shut up,” she retorts, glad that her friend couldn’t see the color on her cheeks. “I just thought, you know, Dawson and I have both been so busy with school that our spark has died a bit. So I wanna do something to try and bring us back.”

“And what better way than to show up with nothing but a trench coat, huh?”

“Well, Audrey, men are easy. Even Dawson, behind all those long monologues and theoretic brain, is still just a man.”

“Hey, all the power to you, sister,” Audrey says, and Joey can picture her hand flying up defensively on the other side of the line. “I hope it works.”

“Oh, it will.” Joey sticks out her tongue teasingly, giggling at her words. She had grown up being so secluded and terrified of sex thanks to her small town where everything gets around in record time --- but she wasn’t that little girl anymore.

So, she shows up to their cheap LA flat quietly, sneaking herself into the living room to ready herself for the surprise. Dawson should be home --- she did her planning, and his last class ended about two hours ago. Once she settles herself on the couch, she calls out, “Sweetheart!”

She hears movement from their bedroom, and she assumes she scared him. Joey feels her heartbeat quicken with each step she hears him take, and she tries to steady her breathing so she doesn’t ruin this.

Dawson finally steps into their living room, struggling to put on a shirt. He had probably gotten used to walking around naked or something whenever she’s not home. Men. “Joey, hey,” he says, a little shaken up. “I thought you weren’t gonna come back until tomorrow. Didn’t you have a big paper due tonight?”

“I finished it early,” Joey replies with a shrug, slowly standing up to reveal her ensemble. Dawson looks really shocked. A little too shocked. Was she really doing something so out of character to have him react like this? Even so, she persists. “I thought I’d come by with a little surprise for you,” she continues, untying her coat belt. “Aren’t you happy to see me?”

Flustered, her boyfriend runs his hands through his hair. “Well, of course, Jo. I just wish you had given me a little more of a warning.”

“I think it’s better when something is a surprise.” With that, she finally drops the trench coat, leaving her standing there with nothing else underneath.

Dawson is pretty dumbfounded, and honestly, that just makes her smirk. She knew this would work. “Anything you wanna say, babe?”

“Dawson, what’s going on?”

The voice comes from inside the house. A voice she doesn’t recognize. A _woman’s_ voice.

Fuck.

“Oh my god,” Joey is quick to say, scrambling to get her trench coat back to cover herself up. “Oh my god.” She can’t form any proper words other than that.

Dawson looks over at the pretty blonde who just came out of their bedroom --- _their_ fucking bedroom! --- and then back to Joey, clearly not prepared to deal with any of it. “Joey ---”

“ _Don’t_.” She’s fuming, her words leased with poison. How _dare_ he? After growing up together, after all the movie nights, the promises, and almost four stupid years together? After she moved to LA just to be with him? “I can’t even look at you right now.” Joey struggles to put her coat back on, trying not to think about that absolute stranger seeing her at her most vulnerable.

Dawson doesn’t seem to understand that she really just wants to leave. He grabs her arm before she makes it out the door. “I can explain ---”

“You’re hilarious if you think I want to hear anything from you right now.” She pulls her arm away from his grip.

He still follows her down the hallway to the elevator, knowing she’ll have to wait for it. “Please, Joey, I really didn’t mean for this to happen. We just finished up shooting and we all went out for drinks, and I guess I got way too drunk and ---”

“Dawson.” Her tone is the most threatening she’s ever heard, and it surprises even her. “We’re done. I don’t want your excuses.” Joey presses the elevator button excessively, anxious to leave so she can drown her sorrows in shitty movies and ice cream and try to forget any of this ever happened.

“Joey, I love you ---”

She doesn’t even think about it. She just slaps him. “Don’t you fucking dare,” Joey whispers, rage fueling her like never before. She can’t tell if the tears in her eyes are from pure hatred or sorrow about all her wasted years on him. Probably both. Dawson finally shuts up, the slap getting her point across. “If you really loved me, Dawson, this would never have even crossed your mind. There’s nothing you can say to fix this. Nothing.” The elevator finally opens, and Joey breathes deeply to get herself together before getting in. “Don’t call me.”

The door closes between them, and Dawson’s hand finally reaches for his red cheek, probably to check that it was real.

She hopes it stings.

* * *

“So,” Joey says with a sigh on the chair Jen, Jack, and Pacey had told her to sit on. “That’s what brought me here. I know it’s kind of depressing, and I promise I’m not looking for pity, but I just really need a place to stay.” It’s a little awkward to dump your entire break up story to a girl you’ve met maybe five times, as well as two complete strangers, so she just shrugs uncomfortably, not knowing what else to say.

“Well, I know my vote!” Jen is quick to exclaim to fill the silence. She looks over to her boys with a big pleading smile, to which they answer with matching raised brows. She replies with a pout she knows they --- well, Jack --- can’t resist.

Pacey, on the other hand.... “I’m sorry, Josephine,” he says as he stands up from his seat on their couch.

“Please, call me Joey.”

“Joey,” Pacey corrects himself. “Can we just have a moment to discuss?”

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, of course! Take all the time you need,” Joey says, trying not to sound too desperate. “I’ll just be out here! Waiting. Patiently.” She throws them a smile as she watches them disappear down their hallway.

God, what had her life come to?

* * *

“She’s lying.” Pacey announces the second they’re alone in the bathroom. Before Jack or Jen can interrupt, he continues, “I mean, look at that girl, does she look like someone who would walk around in nothing but a trench coat to surprise her boyfriend with sex?”

Jen rolls her eyes, “How can someone who’s such a mess be so judgy? It doesn’t matter if she’s lying. She still needs somewhere to live and Jack and I out-voted you, so.”

“Wait, I didn’t vote yet.” Jack crosses his arms, “Do we really want some miserable girl fresh out of a breakup moving in? We already have to deal with Pacey crying over Andie.”

“I’m over Andie.” Pacey lies, not even believing his own words.

“My room is next to yours, Witter, I hear you doing that dumb Italian accent whenever she sends you to voicemail. Ciao, Andie, I-a still love-a you!” Jen imitates his horrible accent, moving on quickly to let him off the hook. His blush is evident. “Jack, you should love the idea of having a straight girl here! You two can talk about hot guys!”

“Me and Pacey talk about hot guys.” Jack shrugs, not sounding fully convinced. He’s still embarrassed on Pacey’s behalf about Jen bringing up his pathetic drunk calls to Andie.

“The more the merrier! Look, she can make rent and she’s a sweet girl, she grew up down the creek from Grams. The fact that _my Grams_ recommended her should be enough to convince you, she hates everyone! Pacey included,” she adds, looking right at him. “With Joey here maybe Grams will consider joining us for Thanksgiving this year.”

“You mean if we let this ticking time bomb of a girl move in with us, your Catholic grandma who thinks I’m going to hell will join us for my favorite holiday? Sounds tempting!” Pacey retorts.

“Grams being here means homemade food.” Jen turns to Jack, knowing his vote is all she needs, “Homemade pumpkin pie…”

“I’m in.” Jack nods, his mouth practically watering at the idea of homemade pie.

“Jack, no!” Pacey shouts, throwing his hands in the air dramatically. Before the three can really dive into another argument, a phone chimes right outside the bathroom and a quiet, “Shit!” sends Jen into a fit of laughter.

Jack walks over to the door, opening it to reveal a frazzled looking Joey Potter putting her phone to her ear, “Hey Bessie!” Joey, seeing this as an opportunity instead of an embarrassment, quickly adds, “How’s my lovely older sister who has a baby and an Inn to run?” She grins at the three of them innocently before continuing. “The interview went great! Yeah, I’m just waiting to hear back right now. I really hope they let me move in so I don’t have to resort to living on the gross and dangerous LA streets, you know?” She looks over at Jen and raises her eyebrows slightly. _Too much?_

Pacey rolls his eyes, giving Jen the dirtiest look he can muster.

“Listen, Bess, I gotta go, okay?” Joey says into the phone. “I’ll call you once I have the news. Oh, and tell Alex I say hi. Yeah, love you too. Bye.” She hangs up the phone and then instantly throws the trio a virtuous smile. “So? Am I calling her back with bad news or good news?” To really sell it, Joey throws them her best puppy dog eyes, mouth practically pouting.

And in that moment, Pacey Witter knew he was in trouble. When he sees Jack and Jen’s eyes on him too, he knows what he has to do, sighing. “I’ll get the loft agreement.”

Joey literally jumps for joy. “Thank you so much, you guys,” she squeals before clearing her throat and gathering herself. It was unlike her to be so… peppy. But, hey, it had been unlikely for her to show up to her place with nothing but a trench coat, so… “You won’t regret this, I promise.” She hugs Jen tightly, and then Jack a little awkwardly. And then she’s face to face with Pacey, who she can tell she’s going to have to do a little more convincing to. She offers him a fist bump.

 _Not a fist bump._ Pacey looks down at her tiny fist and then over at Jack and Jen. He tilts his head, _Is it too late to take back my agreement?_ Jen nods her head toward Joey with a grin and Pacey sighs. “This is going to be a terrible fit, and I can’t wait to say I told you so.”

“I’ll be counting down the days,” Joey replies with a smile, not letting her hand fall until he bumps it.

Pacey gives in, bumping his fist against hers, studying her expression for a long moment before nodding to himself and walking past her and into his bedroom.

Jen claps her hands together, “That went well!”

Joey can’t believe that it actually did.


	2. New TV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a few weeks living with her new roommates, Joey still hasn't worked up the nerve to get the rest of her belongings from her exes place. Jack, Jen, and Pacey help her out with that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we're back with our version of 1x02, we're having so much fun writing this!

“Joey, you _have_ to get your stuff back,” Audrey says over the phone on one of their daily calls. “You dumped Dawson, like, two weeks ago. It’s time.”

“I know,” Joey admits with a sigh. “But literally the last thing I want to do is see his stupid face again.” She still can’t get that stupid blonde girl out of her head, coming out of her bedroom half naked. She’d thrown that stupid trench coat in the trash, but only after she’d stomped on it a few times for good measure. 

“And you won’t,” Audrey assures her. “But only after you’ve gotten all your things. What have you even been wearing?” 

The question makes Joey look down at her current outfit with a frown. “Jen has lent me some of her stuff. So has Jack. I guess that’s the best part of having gay roommates.” 

Audrey laughs on the other side of the line. “I still can’t believe you’re living with them.”

“Me neither,” she admits. “But it’s actually been pretty great. My room is a decent size for the rent, and they’ve been really nice. Well, most of them.” 

“Oooh, do I detect a rivalry?” 

“No,” Joey is quick to reply. “Not at all. Pacey just hasn’t warmed up to me yet, that’s all.”

He’s been pretty avoidant of her, for reasons she doesn’t really understand. For all she knows, she’s been nothing but nice to him, but from the first day he’s had some kind of vendetta against her. She’s not really sure what she can do to change his mind, and to be honest, she’s not even sure she wants to right now. Jen and Jack have assured her that Pacey just has some problems with letting people in, but soon enough she’ll see his big heart. She’s doubtful. 

“Well, it does take a while to warm up to you,” Audrey teases, and Joey scoffs dramatically. “Hey, you can’t blame him, though. Isn’t he, like, the only straight guy in the loft?”

“Actually, Jack told me he’s bisexual.”

“Still. You’re probably the first straight girl he’s ever lived with who he wasn’t sleeping with, it must be messing with his head. And penis.”

“Ew, Audrey!” Joey exclaims with a face. “Please, it is _so_ not like that. Plus, he just got out of a long relationship with Jack’s sister, so things are complicated. Apparently she left for Italy to study abroad and he’s still not over her. I assure you, I am the last person he would ever consider even _looking_ at romantically.”

“Whatever you say,” Audrey drawls out. “Okay, I gotta go or I’m gonna be late for class. When you call me tomorrow you better have all your stuff back.”

“No promises,” Joey says under her breath. “Bye.” She hangs up the phone with a sigh.

She comes out into the living room, and Jen instantly asks her what’s wrong.

“Just stupid Dawson stuff,” Joey replies as she takes a seat on the couch between Jen and Pacey. His eyes are glued on the TV.

“Oh, come on, still?” she hears Jack say from the kitchen. “Joey, you deserve better than that guy. Please tell me you’re not thinking about taking him back.”

“No, God no,” she answers. “He just still has pretty much all of my stuff at our --- _his_ place, as you know."

“Look, Joey, I barely remember the guy, but from what I recall he was a big nerd,” Jen says, wrapping her arm around Joey’s shoulders supportively. “You can totally take him, if that’s what you’re worried about.” 

Joey scoffs. “Oh, I know _that_. I’m just...” She sighs, running her hands through her hair. “I don’t know, Dawson and I have so much history together. I have no doubt that if I see him again he’s going to try to sweet talk me into forgiving him. He knows me better than anyone, so he knows exactly what to say to get to me. It’s so infuriating.”

Pacey chuckles beside her, and Joey is quick to turn around to face him with raised brows. 

“Yes, Pacey? Do you have something you want to say?”

Pacey turns to Joey with a smirk. “It’s just funny. Seeing you act all tough and angry. The guy cheated on you, what could he possibly say to get you back?” His voice is light, but not exactly judgement-free.

Joey narrows her eyes at him, and feels Jen tighten her grip on her shoulders to literally hold her back. “I don’t know, Pace, he just manages to say stuff that gets to me. I’m sorry you can’t understand having that kind of connection with someone.” It may have been way too harsh, but the words stumble out of her before she can help herself. Jen shushes her before she says anything more, and she calms herself down. “He has a hold over me, I can’t help it,” she admits lamely. “It’s what growing up together and dating for almost four years does to you, I guess.” Joey grabs the nearest pillow and groans into it.

Pacey tilts his head, _can’t understand having that kind of connection with someone!?!?_ Part of him feels defensive about the accusation, but a larger part feels stupid for all the comments Jack and Jen have made in front of her about he and Andie’s past. Especially since his heartbreak apparently didn’t sound genuine to her. He shifts in his seat, ready to question her comment, but Jen catches his eye. She’s shooting him daggers, her hand gripping Joey’s arm protectively. Pacey sighs quietly, “I may not understand _that_ , but I understand dealing with people you don’t want to. So… Let’s just practice what you’re gonna say. I’m _great_ at being a dick apparently, so I’m already in character.” He smiles softly, trying to ignore the urge to offer to just go get her stuff for her.

Joey can’t help but smile. “At least you’re self aware, then.” She sits up on the couch, hands placed on the pillow on her lap. “Okay…” She clears her throat, not really understanding what he was expecting but going with it anyways. “Dawson, I would really like to get my stuff back today.” She has to fight every urge to burst out laughing, having trouble imaging _Pacey_ as Dawson in front of her right now.

Even Jack and Jen are struggling to keep it together as they watch the weirdness ensue. Pacey slumps back, arms crossed over his chest. “Well, Josephine, today’s not great for me. I have some overrated 90s movies to overanalyze.” 

Jen can’t hold it in anymore and lets out a laugh so loud that she snorts afterward. Pacey shoots her a look, eyes returning to Joey expectantly. 

The brunette puts on her best offended face, trying not to let the infectious laughter get to her. She simply shakes her head, breaking eye contact with Pacey. “Nope, I can’t do it. You’re not taking it seriously! Dawson has never called me Josephine in all the years he’s known me, it’s just weird.”

“How am _I_ supposed to know that?” Pacey shrugs. “Sounds to me like an excuse… Like you’re looking for reasons to not confront him,” he states, his tone light. “Doesn’t it sound like an excuse, Jackers?”

Jack laughs lightly, finally sitting down next to Pacey with a snack. “I don’t poke my nose into other people’s business the way you and Jen do, Pace. But nice try.”

Joey barely hears Jack’s reply. Instead, her eyes narrow at Pacey, full offense now taken. The Potter blood in her simply will _not_ stand for anyone doubting her courage. She can sense Jen and Jack watching them eagerly, curious to see what she’ll do. Finally, Joey takes a deep breath, and then turns her whole body to face Pacey in full seriousness. “Fine, then, Witter. Try me again,” she dares him, a little cocky.

Pacey narrows his eyes too, mirroring Joey without realizing it. “Like I said before, _Jo._ I’m busy today and don’t have time to just hand over _our_ things to you. Come back another time, unless you don’t really want your stuff back and this was just an excuse to see me.”

“Oh, you wish. Come on, _Dawson_ , that’s not fair and you know it. I have clothes here, and books, and --- whatever, it doesn’t matter. I have a right to get my stuff so I can officially never have to see you again.”

Jack and Jen’s eyes jump from Joey to Pacey as they go back and forth. While Jack was simply entertained by their banter, Jen couldn’t help but think that _Pacey had finally met his match._

“Are you sure you never want to see me again, Jo? You said it yourself, I have a hold on you.” Pacey shrugs, only being so harsh because he wishes someone had been this honest with him when Andie broke his heart. “So do you really think I have a hold on you, or are you just scared because I decided to let go when you still thought we were happy?”

Jack and Jen go silent, Jack squirming in his seat uncomfortably and keeping his eyes on his bowl of pretzels. 

Joey is a bit taken aback by the question, and she’s sure it shows on her face. _Oh_. One look at Jen and Jack and she quickly catches onto the subtext: This is about more than just her and Dawson. Jen catches her eyes and gives her a sad look, and Joey actually feels a little guilty for spilling salt on Pacey’s still-fresh wound. “You’re wrong,” Joey finally says, looking Pacey right in the eyes. She finally sees something there she hasn’t seen before. A softness, maybe? “I want to let you go.”

Nodding his head, Pacey can’t help but break Joey’s gaze. Over her shoulder, Jen gives him a sympathetic smile and he looks down at his lap for a moment. Finally, he clears his throat, leaning forward to grab the pillow from Joey’s lap and standing up quickly. “Okay, then. Prove it.” Pacey holds the pillow in front of him. “I’m back to being charming ol’ Pacey and the pillow gets to be Dawson now. Get angry, Potter.”

Eyebrows furrowed, Joey looks around to her other roommates for assistance, not really knowing how to react. Jack simply eats another pretzel, and Jen shrugs. So much help _they_ are. “Alright, fine,” the brunette agrees, throwing her hands up in defeat. “So, what, you want me to punch him?”

“He’s holding your belongings captive like a child,” Pacey coaches. 

Jack adds through a mouthful of pretzel, “Not to mention, he cheated on you.”

Jen smacks his arm before stealing a treat for herself. “Thanks for the reminder.” Jack shrugs innocently and gets back to watching the insanity unfolding in front of him. 

“What Jack said,” Pacey mumbles, nodding to Joey encouragingly, unsure as to why he was suddenly being so nice to her. “Get angry and hit the pillow before I get bored of being helpful.” 

With a roll of her eyes, Joey gets up from her seat and takes her boxer stance. She psychs herself up with a few hops, and brings back the godforsaken image of Dawson standing there with the attractive blonde he cheated on her with. That’s all she needs, really. She sees Dawson’s stupid face in front of her and throws a punch at the pillow, surprising even herself with how hard she hits it. She smirks proudly. “Is that good enough for you, Coach Witter?”

“No, the pillow barely moved.” Joey scoffs, her pride hurt. “Come on,” Pacey scowls, looking at Jack and Jen for some help. 

“Think about all the years you wasted on him!” Jen shouts, her eyebrows knitted angrily. “All the boring movies he made you watch! All the times he made you feel guilty for doing nothing wrong!” Jen was simply going off of the few things she knew about Dawson, but it seemed to be working. 

Joey lets it all wash over her, remembering every single time Dawson spoke to her like she was somehow beneath him, and everything she ever gave up just to be with him. All that just for them just to end like _this_. She practically screams as she takes another go, hitting the pillow with everything she’s got. She hears her roommates cheer her on and it only adds to her fire, even to the point where Pacey has to readjust his footing to keep himself steady. “Fuck! You! And! Fuck! Jurassic! Park!” she screams. Every word is accentuated with another punch. 

“Steven Spielberg sucks!” Jack agrees from his spot on the couch. Pacey smiles proudly. 

It’s not enough for her --- they’ve opened the floodgates now. Joey takes the pillow from Pacey’s hands and whacks it on the floor, not really thinking anymore. It feels _so good_ to finally let all this pent up rage out. 

Too bad she gets _way_ too into it. Before she can catch herself, her arm movements get a little too out of control and she ends up whacking their TV off its stand. She hears it crack as it hits the floor. “Shit,” Joey says with a wince. Suddenly, the apartment is quiet. “Oh, God. I’m so sorry, you guys.” She’s still trying to catch her breath. 

Pacey had backed away during Joey’s little outburst, hands up as he watched her all but destroy his favorite couch pillow. He let out a yelp as she hit the TV, a hand covering his mouth in absolute horror. _This is what he gets for being nice to her._ “Oh my god.”

Jack sits up, now silent and suddenly uninterested in his pretzels. Jen stands up slowly. “Everybody stay calm, it was just an accident.”

“Is it too late to try and talk her into moving back in with this guy?” Pacey asks, his tone chillingly monotone. He’s looking at Jen now.

“Pacey, don’t be ridiculous.” Jen waves him off as Jack slowly stands up to kneel beside the shattered flatscreen in mournful silence.

Joey’s anger and hatred have turned into panic and embarrassment now, and her mind is racing to think of a solution since she can’t exactly afford a new TV right now. She keeps swearing under her breath until she remembers what started all this in the first place. “No, I can fix this,” she assures the trio with a nod. “I paid for our TV back when I first moved in with Dawson because he needed to use his money for his new movie. He never ended up paying me back.” She becomes more and more confident with each word. “Yeah, I can do this. I can do it. I was already going to do it, but now I just add one more thing onto the list.”

Pacey’s brow raises, impressed by how confident she suddenly was, glancing at Jack and Jen. Jack jumps to his feet. “New TV? Let’s go. Me and Jen have a _Will & Grace _ rewatch to finish.”

“God, you’re depressingly cliche.” Pacey teases before looking back to Joey. “You’re really ready to head over there?”

Joey nods her head yes with a smile. “Yep. You got me fired up, Pace. You did your job.” She starts to head for the door, but quickly does a 180 to turn to the trio with pursed lips. “I don’t have a car right now.”

“My car doesn’t have a trunk.” Jen puts her hands up, turning to Jack. 

“Mine’s in the shop this week, remember?”

“Fine, I guess I’ll drive.” Pacey offers, going to grab his keys from the coffee table. 

“Yeah right, your car barely even runs,” Jack points out. “Call Gretchen.”

“What?” Jen turns to Jack, her voice cracking nervously. 

“Who’s Gretchen?” Joey asks, looking around for an answer. “Do you guys have a personal Uber driver or something?”

“She might as well be,” Jack explains, grinning at Jen. “Tell her about Gretchen, Jennifer.”

Pacey interrupts, groaning as he grabs his phone from his pocket. “She’s my sister. She’s got a huge car, helps us move furniture all the time.”

“You’re really calling Gretchen?!” Jen asks before pushing past Jack to run into her room. 

“Make sure you put on that red lipstick she likes on you!” Jack calls after her with a laugh.

“Quiet you!” Pacey warns Jack as he brings his phone to his ear. He glances at Joey with his famous Pacey Witter Scowl and points at a money-filled jar on the coffee table. “You owe the _Dumbass Jar_ ten bucks for this.”

Jack awes proudly as he goes to grab his jacket. “You’re officially an Apartment 4D dumbass, Josephine Potter.” His hands squeeze her shoulders endearingly. “You’re one of us now.”

“ _Yippee_ ,” Joey says with a deadpan tone as she takes out her wallet.

* * *

“You all owe me big time,” Gretchen says from her seat behind the wheel, eyes fixated on her mirror so she can stare the three of them down during a red light.

Jen, who was now wearing lipstick and eyeliner, wipes her sweaty hands on her jeans from her place in the backseat. “Thanks so much for doing this, Gretch.” 

Joey can’t see it from her place in the passenger’s seat, but she just knows that as soon as the words had come out of Jen’s mouth, the poor blonde had winced, embarrassed. So she swoops in to save her friend some trouble. “So, Gretchen,” she says, head turning to face the older Witter. “I didn’t get a chance to properly introduce myself yet. I’m Joey, I’m their new roommate.”

“Right, you’re the one who broke the TV,” Gretchen says with a teasing smirk, and Joey cringes at her words. “Way to make an impression.” 

Joey tries to keep her cool. “What can I say? I guess I’m just really trying to solidify my place here.”

Gretchen actually laughs at that. “So, I hear we’re off to an ex-boyfriend’s place?”

“Yeah, Joey’s,” Jack answers behind them, and then Joey hears him crunch on a pretzel. Because of course he brought those on the trip. “She needs to get her stuff back and maybe throw a few punches.”

“Maybe if we’re lucky, this new TV will survive Potter’s wrath,” Pacey comments. 

Joey rolls her eyes at him, and then instructs Gretchen to take the next right turn up ahead. 

“So why did you guys break up?” Gretchen interrogates as she follows instructions. “You know, if you don’t mind me asking.”

“Well, I, uh…” Joey’s explained it plenty of times now, but it still hadn’t gotten any easier.

“She caught him cheating on her with some blonde,” Jack finishes for her. 

Joey sighs. “Right. Yep. Thanks, Jack,” she mumbles, lips pursed.

“Shit. I’m really sorry,” Gretchen says instantly, and Joey knows she means it. “Men suck.”

Pacey gasps dramatically in the backseat. “Excuse me, your favorite little brother can hear you.” 

Gretchen rolls her eyes. “Present company excluded,” she adds. “But, really, men suck. They’re so impossible. Most of them can’t communicate their emotions to save their lives. Honestly, that’s why I’m starting to prefer women. They’re better in bed anyway.”

Jen coughs in the backseat, suddenly choking on a pretzel she had stolen from Jack’s bag. Her roommates can hardly contain their laughter at Jen’s poor gay panic.

“Woah, you good there, Jen?” Gretchen asks, not being able to take her gaze off the road for too long. Jack is giving Jen some loud pats on the back to try to help her out.

“Yep,” Jen answers through a cough, the thumbs up she gives not being convincing at all. “All good here, don’t worry. Just went down the wrong pipe.” 

Pacey is giving Jen a dirty look, mumbling, “Maybe we should’ve left you at home to make some room for that new TV.” 

“Shut _up,_ Witter,” Jen hits his arm gently, clearing her throat, “Jo, are we almost there?”

Joey’s heart has been speeding up with every mile. “Yes,” she finally answers. “It should be at the next right turn, the tall building with graffiti paint on the walls.” She takes a deep breath as they near it. “Yeah, this one.”

Pacey, Jen, and Jack all find themselves looking out the window out of curiosity. Of all the assumptions Pacey had made about Joey, this neighborhood was not what he was expecting. It wasn’t necessarily bad, he’d lived in much worse before leaving New York. From Joey’s comments about Dawson never having a solid job (he’d made some excuse about not wanting to stifle his creative integrity), this less than ideal neighborhood made sense.

“Okay, okay,” Jen leans forward between the front seats, “Let’s get you back in the zone, Jo.” She turns to Gretchen with a nervous smile, “Can I please have the aux cord, Gretch?”

Pacey pinches Jen’s arm childishly as Gretchen hands over the cord. She ignores him and queues up a song with a proud grin on her face, but when the song starts to play, nearly everyone groans.

“Really, Jen? _Eye of the Tiger_? You are such a dork,,” Jack whines, making a grab for her phone.

“At least play some of your angry girl music,” Pacey adds, covering his ears.

“This is the most famous pump up song for a reason!” Jen defends, holding the phone away from Jack’s grasp. “Plus, it’s Joey that really matters here.” The blonde turns up the volume as Survivor finally starts singing. “ _Risin’ up, back on the street_ …” 

Joey rolls her eyes at her friend, but she can’t stop her foot from tapping along. Her stomach has been turning ever since Gretchen put the car in park, and she’s not quite sure she can force herself out of her seat now that she’s actually here. But damn, those guitar chords sure are catchy.

Out of the corner of her eye, Joey catches Gretchen starting to wiggle her shoulders and tap on the steering wheel and she can’t help but laugh. By the second verse, the Witter girl is a goner. “ _So many times, it happens too fast…_ ”

Jen instantly turns her head, beaming and blushing simultaneously. “ _You change your passion for glory!_ ” 

Jack shakes his head, but he’s not immune for long. “ _You must fight just to keep them alive..._ ”

Ah, what the hell. Joey whips her head dramatically, jazz fingers to her left eye. “ _It’s the eye of the tiger, it’s the thrill of the fight!_ ” She’s not singing very well due to being too busy laughing and following along with her friends by punching the air on the beat. 

Well, everyone except Pacey. When Joey’s eyes land on him, he can’t help but laugh. _God, what a dork._ Against his better judgement, Pacey sways his head a little, completely offbeat.

The car is practically shaking once they reach the famous line at the end of the chorus. “ _And she’s watching us all with the eye…_ ” They all hold for a dramatic beat. “ _Of the tiger!_ ”

Once the song ends, they’re all pretty out of breath, but Joey’s blood is pumping and she’s reaching for the car door before she thinks twice about it and chickens out again. “Okay, let’s go!”

She hears Jen and Gretchen cheer for her from inside the car, but no one follows her out. Joey furrows her brows, knocking on a window until Gretchen lets it down. “Is no one coming with me?” Joey asks.

“I didn’t know we had to,” Gretchen says.

“Here, Jack, why don’t you go?” Jen offers, practically pushing Jack out of the car. “You’re the buff one.”

Jack opens the door but stops with one foot out. “Why doesn’t Pacey go? He’s the one who coached her.”

“Why does _anyone_ have to go with her?” Pacey quips.

Joey hears Gretchen sigh before she finally takes the key out of the ignition. “Fine, I’ll come. I’ve dealt with a lot of stupid guys in my time, I might as well offer some wisdom to the less fortunate.”

Jen is way too quick to practically leap over Pacey’s lap and out of the car. “I’ll come, too!” she exclaims, smiling at Gretchen. “Girl power!” She puts her fist up in the air. Joey tries not to cringe, but Gretchen just seems to chuckle.

“Well, now we _have_ to go,” Jack sighs, finally putting his bag of pretzels down.

Pacey is quick to contradict. “I mean, we don’t _have_ to.” 

Joey bends down to Pacey’s eye level, elbows resting on the open window frame. “Please, Pace?” She’s not even sure why she wants him there, but she could use as many people for moral support as possible. And he _had_ managed to get her fired up and confident before, somehow, and she could do with that again right now. “I could really use some backup,” she pleads.

Pacey lets out a heavy sigh, holding Joey’s gaze for too long of a moment. Before he has a chance to recognize the feeling in his chest, Jack pushes him out of the car. Luckily, Pacey lands on his feet, giving Jack a dirty look before turning to Joey, “Backup, of course. Yeah, let’s do this thing.”

Joey smirks triumphantly, actually confident that this could only go _well_ for them now. Right? She leads them through the door and to the elevator and prays that Dawson isn’t even home.

Unfortunately, prayers don’t always work. 

Joey still has her key so it’s no problem for her to get in. The problem is that Dawson is sitting on the couch once she opens the door, almost as if he had been _waiting_ for her to come back. She freezes on the spot, but then Jen nudges her shoulder and she’s forced to go in. 

“Joey,” Dawson says, getting up from his seat. “Thank God you came back.” He stops before saying anything else, finally realizing that she had brought company. “Um…” He throws them all a nervous fake smile. “Who are these people?”

Joey’s palms are sweating and her words keep getting stuck in her throat. Everything in this apartment is so familiar and comforting, and Dawson is wearing that green shirt she loves on him, and…

“We’re Joey’s new roommates,” Jack answers for her, since she’s been silent for a little too long. 

Dawson reacts with raised brows. “Oh? You already found a new place?”

Jen intertwines her arm with Joey’s, smiling proudly. “Yep, she’s one of us, now.”

“Then why are you here?” Dawson interrogates, suddenly defensive. 

“Well, it turns out Joey left in a bit of a rush last time, so,” Pacey claps his hands together, his confidence dripping in every word. “We’ve come to help her move out for good.” He can’t help but shoot Joey a quick smile.

Joey smiles back, her strength slowly returning. As she’s about to turn back to Dawson to finally speak, her eyes catch that her favorite potted plant by the door, which she secretly had named Cece, had died in the few weeks she had been away. The few leaves that remained were a deep brown, all sad and depressing, and for some reason, that was the last straw for her. 

“You really couldn’t have watered my plant?” Joey accuses Dawson, her voice raging. “You couldn’t do the _one thing_ I always ask you to do?” 

Gretchen is quick to her side, taking Joey’s hand and leading her deeper into the apartment. “Your room, let’s go,” she says, narrowing her eyes at Dawson. Jen follows behind.

“We’ll get started on that TV, then,” Jack says, patting Pacey on the back to motion for him to follow. 

Pacey nods, following Jack past Dawson toward the beautiful flat screen behind him. “Wait, _what?!_ You can’t take the TV!” Dawson whines.

“Potter paid for it,” Pacey shrugs, pushing messy stacks of DVDs out of his way to get to the power cords behind the TV. “You should really clean this place up, man. You’re a bachelor now. No girl’s gonna want to date a slob. Especially with all these overrated movies on display.”

Jack laughs as he and Pacey pick up the TV carefully. Pacey knows Jack could definitely carry it by himself, but he figures he’ll look more useful this way.

The girls come tumbling out of the bedroom, somehow having filled two backpacks and an old box full of Joey’s things. Dawson turns around, not being able to keep up with five people on him. “Joey, what is going on?” 

She looks him straight in the eye for the first time since that infamous day. “I’m letting you go, Dawson. For good.” 

She’s about to walk away, but Dawson has never made things easy for her. He reaches out and grabs the cardboard box she’s holding, which is full of clothes and accessories she threw in. “I’m not letting you do this, Jo,” he insists, and Joey narrows her eyes angrily. She tries to pull the box back from his grip, but he turns it into a tug of war which leads to them dropping a bunch of the box’s contents on the floor. 

“God, you really are the worst, huh?” Jen complains, instantly bending down to help Joey pick her things up. 

Dawson, now in full immature mode, simply keeps dropping them back out.

Jack and Pacey exchange a look and Jack adjusts his grip to carry the television by himself. Jack walks toward the door to stay away from the commotion, protecting the precious flat screen. Pacey walks forward, grabbing a fluffy red knitted hat from Dawson’s hand, putting it on his head. Dawson looks at Pacey, bewildered, and Pacey fights the urge to smile because of how pathetic this dude looks. Pacey crosses his arms, his expression threatening, “What, did you want this hat? Take it from me. Go for it.”

Dawson stares at Pacey for a long moment, looking completely thrown off before he turns to Joey, “What kind of freaks are you living with, Jo?”

Joey barely hears Dawson’s question. She’s too busy grinning at Pacey, unable to believe that he really did that for her. 

Gretchen can’t really believe it, either. She likes to think she knows her little brother better than anyone, and she knows he’s willing to do anything for the people he loves --- but didn’t he _just_ meet this girl a few weeks ago? Her eyes dart between the two of them, knowing she’s missing something here, but this wasn’t the best time to question it. With a shrug, she follows Pacey’s lead, trusting his judgement. Her hands reach for a cute bucket hat, and she forces it on. “You know, Dawson, I’ve known a lot of guys like you. None of them have ever been worth the time or the trouble. And _you_ are not any different.” 

Jen is next to follow suit, squeezing on a bright red visor. 

“Psst, Jen,” Jack whispers. “Can you put one on me? My hands are kinda full.”

With a chuckle, the blonde obliges, picking up both a baseball hat and a floppy beach hat. She teases Jack by pretending to give him the former, before handing it over to Joey instead and slapping the straw beach hat on her best friend with a smirk. Jack narrows his eyes with faux annoyance, but it’s not like he can really do anything about it. 

Joey adjusts her own hat, practically glowing with pride at what just unfolded before her. “I live with the best freaks around,” she says, her cheeks almost hurting from how big she’s smiling. “And we’re gonna take these, thank you.” She finally manages to put everything back into her box and stand back up. “And everything else that belongs to me. And we’re gonna take it back to _our_ apartment, and I am never going to see you again.” 

“Good for you, Jo!” Jen says in support.

Dawson shakes his head, either from shame, embarrassment, or annoyance. Probably all three. “You know, I thought we were gonna handle this like adults, Joey,” he says in his usual condescending tone.

“Yeah?” Joey retorts with a scoff. “Well, I thought you were the love of my life. So I guess we were both wrong.” 

“Oooh,” Jack says supportively from behind them, clearly beginning to struggle with his grip on the flat screen. She sees Dawson roll his eyes at him, but she’s full of pride. 

“You know what, Dawson?” She can’t help but add in one more dig, a last twist of the knife. “ _Thank you_ for cheating on me, because if you hadn’t, I probably would have married you. And what a sad life that would have been.”

“Burn!” Jen exclaims, and she holds her hand up for a high-five, which Joey gives her happily. 

She looks over to Pacey, and for the first time since they’ve met, he’s giving her a real smile. She glances down to see he’s holding up a fist for her, and she can’t help but chuckle. She fist bumps him with a grin, and Jen, Jack, and Gretchen erupt in cheers.

“Bye, Dawson! I hope to never see you again!” Jen says as the elevator door closes, and Jack echoes her with the same words. “See ya never, Leery!”

Joey flips Dawson off one last time. Her cheeks hurt from smiling so much.

* * *

  
  


Later that night, after setting up the new TV, Joey and Pacey relax on the couch.

“Thanks for doing that for me, by the way,” Joey says softly. “With the hats.” She’s never had someone stand up for her like that before. Well, except for Bessie, but she kind of had to due to familial ties.

“What?” Pacey takes a sip from his beer with a shrug, “It was nothing, that guy seems like a jerk. He did _not_ deserve this TV.” _Or you._

“Right. You did it all for the TV,” Joey teasingly questions, eyebrow raised. 

“Well, I certainly didn’t do it for a _Red Sox fan_ ,” Pacey exclaims, making an immature gagging noise. Any amount of warming up toward her Pacey had accomplished these past few weeks had taken a few steps back after seeing her in that Red Sox hat earlier.

“What?” Joey asks defensively, shrugging. “My family likes them.”

“Well, your family has terrible taste. You’re lucky I even let you bring that hat into this loft, because I have every right, as a lifelong Mets fan, to burn that thing.” Pacey’s tone is light, even if his facial expression is his usual grimace.

Joey chuckles with a shake of her head. “You wanna know what I think, Pace?” 

“What do you think, Jo?” Pacey turns in his seat ever so slightly.

“I think,” Joey starts, facing him fully and poking one of his arms. “That you’re finally softening up to me.”

Pacey’s nose scrunches up like he’s just smelled something terrible. “Me? Softening up? Towards a _Sox_ fan?” 

Joey doesn’t believe him. “Aw, come on, Pacey. Admit it. I think you might actually put up with me more than you let on.” She’s grinning, knowing that he hates every word coming out of her mouth. “Dare I say you may even _like_ having me around?”

“You’re crazy, Potter.” He shakes his head, letting a small smile slip, glancing up at Jack and Jen as they enter the room to join them on the couch.

“What are you two talking about?” Jen asks casually.

“Nothing, just trying to convince Joey to denounce her past mistakes as a Red Sox fan,” Pacey teases, straightening in his seat toward the TV.

“It could be worse, I was raised a Dodgers fan.” Jack grabs the remote, wrongfully assuming he could just mention this without causing a commotion.

But, of course, Pacey and Jen start loudly booing and Jen hits him with a pillow. “Some crimes cannot be forgiven, McPhee.” 

“Well, I’m the one with a Hulu account and that’s the only way we can watch _Will & Grace _, so…” Jack raises an eyebrow.

Jen sighs, laying her head on Jack’s shoulder dramatically, “Fine, I guess I forgive you.”

“I don’t, but I think you like it better that way,” Pacey retorts, turning to Joey as Jack queues up an episode. “What about you, Jo? Do you forgive Jackers for being a fan of the most obnoxious team in baseball history for the first 18 years of his life?”

Joey is almost surprised to hear her name, content to just sit there and watch the three of them argue over dumb stuff she doesn’t understand for hours. She takes note of Pacey’s nickname for Jack, saving it in her mind for future use since she sees Jack wince at the usage of it. She catches Pacey’s eyes and smiles gently, silently trying to thank him for including her. “Hey, I’m not really one to comment.” She sees Jack throw her a thankful smile, but he should have let her finish first. “But I’ve always been a bit of a follower. So, I’m sorry, Jack. I unfortunately side with the crowd,” she announces with a shrug.

Jack uses the remote to point to her threateningly. “You’ll regret those words when some weird guy is hitting on you at a bar and you need me to pretend to be your boyfriend.” 

“Yeah right,” Jen says, leaning back to make herself comfortable for their binge watching. “As if Pacey wouldn’t do it for her.” 

Pacey pauses mid-sip, glancing at Jen with a furrowed brow. He quickly lowered the bottle from his lips, “I thought we all agreed I’m too nonthreatening to ward off unwanted drunk dudes. We’ve learned that lesson every time I try to help you _and_ Jack out.”

“You were pretty threatening today…” Jen mumbles with a smirk.

“Shh,” Jack says loudly. “I’m pressing play.”

As the episode starts, all four of them focus on the shiny new television in front of them. At the sound of her laugh, Pacey glances at Joey beside him. She doesn’t seem to notice him looking, too busy enjoying whatever hijinks Will and Grace are already up to, but Pacey finds himself smiling now too. He turns back to the screen, still smiling. Then it’s Joey’s turn to steal a glance at him from the corner of her eyes, trying not to be too obvious about it. She’s still not over how he surprised her today, and their banter seems to flow more easily than ever. The grin on his face makes her feel even better about how today went, and now that she’s finally wearing her own clothes and watching her own TV, it’s really not that hard for her to call this place her home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks so much for reading!! :)


	3. Wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack and Jen convince Pacey and Joey to pretend to be dating since Andie is back in town for a wedding they all have to attend. Obviously, wildness ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took a while, taylor swift surprise dropped an album and we had to process. (happy birthday to her, by the way!) (also she said she's been binging dawson's creek during quarantine and we claim her as a jacey warrior)
> 
> we hope you guys enjoy our version of episode 3!
> 
> content warning for alcohol mentions

Joey steps out of her closet in one of the dresses Gretchen dropped off that morning. It was bright yellow and low cut, but a little too big on her petite figure. She gives her roommates a grimace, already shaking her head before they even say anything.

“Oh, come on! I can alter it!” Jen offers, but Joey is already back into the closet to try again.

“No, she’s right, it’s not the right color on her,” Jack says as he hugs a pillow tighter to his chest.

Joey pokes her head out, brows furrowed. “Thank you?”

“No offense, Joey, this just needs to be perfect,” Jack explains. “Andie and Pacey haven’t seen each other in months and it’s important to me that my sister and best friend get used to being around each other without making it into a soap opera.”

“Giving Pacey a fake girlfriend is straight out of a soap opera, Jack,” Joey calls from the closet as she looks for another dress.

“She’s not wrong,” Jen whispers from beside Jack.

“You and I both know that Pacey can’t be trusted alone with Andie, he’s too much of a romantic,” Jack whispers back, not noticing Joey peeking her head out of the closet. “And if he finds out she’s moving back to LA---”

“What?!” Joey practically yelps, eyes instinctively checking the empty doorway of her bedroom before lowering her voice to a whisper. “Andie’s coming back?”

Jen shushes her, jumping off from her seat on the bed to practically jump into the closet with her. “I thought we just needed to make her jealous for one day!” Joey exclaims, swatting Jen away but knowing to still keep her voice down. “If I need to pretend to be Pacey’s girlfriend for any longer than that, I simply won’t survive.” Jack gives her a look. “I won’t! I’m a bad liar!”

Jen and Jack share a moment of raised brows, and Joey instantly narrows her eyes at whatever secret coded language they just exchanged. “What?” she interrogates.

“Nothing,” Jen quickly answers, though it’s clear she’s hiding a smile. “We just have a hard time believing that acting as if Pacey is tolerable is gonna be as dramatically life ending as you’re making it out to be.”

With a roll of her eyes, Joey goes back to picking through her closet. “I’m not saying he’s not… _dateable_ , per se, I’m just…” She doesn’t really know where she was going with this. She shakes her head, changing the subject before either of them catch on. “Look, I said yes to this because I thought it would be fun to mess around for a day, but I don’t know if I’m comfortable with knowing that she’s gonna be here full time.”

“She won’t be around that much, trust me,” Jen assures her quietly, “When Andie has school to focus on, she has no social life. And we can just lie and say you two broke up after a few months. It’s totally fine!” She reaches behind Joey for a red dress, almost instinctively knowing that that was the one. Cliché as it may be, she knew that Pacey had always been a sucker for a pretty girl in a red dress. “Here, do this one.”

Joey takes the hanger but hesitates. She looks behind Jen’s shoulder and makes eye contact with Jack, raising her eyebrows in question. “She’s your sister,” she says. “You really think she’s gonna buy this?”

“I really do.” Jack softens. “Andie and Pacey… They really care about each other and I care about them, but they can’t keep doing this to each other. They swore last time that they work better as friends and wanted to work towards that, but I just don’t think they can be trusted alone together. Pacey gets all sappy at weddings, and they might end up doing something they’ll both regret. Look, the goal for tonight is to show them that they can be friends without backsliding, so when Pacey eventually finds out she’s moving back, he can handle it.”

Joey sighs, looking back between Jen and Jack before their pleading eyes finally drive her over the edge. Plus, it wouldn’t be that awful of a commitment to dedicate herself to being as annoying and clingy to Pacey as she could be for the day. They were on pretty good terms, she thought, and this might actually be a fun bonding opportunity. Defeated, she rolls her eyes. “Fine,” she says, and her roommates celebrate quietly, high fiving each other. “But you guys owe me _so bad_ \----”

They all shut up abruptly as Pacey finally enters the room in the midst of fussing with his untied tie. “Are we sure this is really necessary? I have my own dress clothes.” He glances down at the neatly tailored brown pants and clean cut white button-down shirt. Somehow he’s managed to put on his suspenders successfully, but after seven attempts at tying his tie, he’s about ready to give up.

Jack stands up to tie his tie for him as Jen pushes Joey back into the closet to get changed one more time. “Yeah, and you’ve had those clothes for, like, ten years,” Jack says. “If you want to show Andie that you’re doing well without her then new clothes that actually make you look presentable is the way to go.”

Pacey sighs. “This is stupid. It’s never going to work, she’ll see through me and Joey sucks at lying.” He hears Jen snicker from inside the closet, though he’s not sure why.

Jack finishes his tie and rests his hands on Pacey’s shoulders firmly, “Pace, relax. I’m sure Andie is just as nervous as you are. She has no reason to believe we’re all lying to her. I’m sure she’ll be so busy catching up with old college friends and telling them about Italy that she’ll barely have time for us.”

“We’re all sitting at the same table, Jack,” Pacey deadpans, sitting on the edge of Joey’s bed with a dramatic sigh.

He hears a dress being zipped up, and Joey finally steps out from the closet wearing a beautiful wine red dress that stopped mid-thigh. She was wearing just enough make-up so it wasn’t overdone but still looked effortless, and her hair was tied in a low bun to show off her shoulders. She twirls dramatically for the three of them.

Pacey’s eyes widen ever so slightly at the sight of his roommate, he’s never seen her so dressed up before. He does his best to not look completely mesmerized, busying himself with the task of neatly straightening his tie.

“Yup, this is the one,” Jack declares, walking over to put his arm around Jen’s shoulders so he can bring her closer and plant a kiss on her forehead. “You’re a genius, J.”

“I know,” Jen replies with a smile. “Red is your color, Jo.” The brunette tries not to blush at the compliments and instead goes to make sure her purse has everything she needs.

Pacey nods along, running a careful hand over his gelled hair semi-nervously. He didn’t dress up often, and the idea of seeing Andie so soon has been weighing on him all week --- especially since Jack concocted this plan for Joey to pose as his girlfriend. It’s a weird enough favor to ask of any friend, but especially such a new one. But then again, Pacey thought a lot of things about Joey was weird. And the fact that they’d actually become friends over the last couple months was even weirder, but he was secretly really happy she’d moved in with them. He just hoped things at this dumb wedding went okay.

Jen finally breaks the silence by clearing her throat dramatically. “ _Well,_ I should go get ready, too, I don’t wanna make us late. Jack? Let’s leave our little lovebirds to come up with their game plan, shall we?” He takes her hand without a word and lets himself be whisked away to be her helper, but not before throwing Joey a smirk.

Pacey watches his friends leave, calling out long after they left the room, “By the way, Jack, I used your hair gel!”

“I can tell!” Jack screams back from the hallway, and Joey can’t help but chuckle.

She stands there a little awkwardly, playing with her hands before throwing Pacey a smile. “So…” She finally actually looks at him, and it makes her not remember what she was going to say. For someone she’s gotten so used to seeing in old t-shirts and cargo shorts, Pacey actually wasn’t half bad at cleaning himself up for the occasion. Of course, said occasion was seeing his ex-girlfriend, so Joey shouldn’t be surprised he suddenly looked so handsome. She clears her throat anxiously. “Are you ready for this?”

“What, to see my ex-girlfriend or to pretend to be dating you?” Pacey teases with a smile.

She laughs. “Both.”

“It’ll be fine. I’m excited to show Andie that I’m okay, I know she worries.” Pacey admits, looking down at his lap.

“And you think having me pretend to be your girlfriend will accomplish that?”

Pacey nods, glancing up at her. “At one point during our awkward ‘we’re probably about to break up,’ stage, I swore I’d never be able to move on… So, this’ll be big.” He pauses, clearing his throat, “In a good way. Y’know, she lives all the way in Italy and I’m so happy for her. I don’t want her to worry about me.”

Joey purses her lips in order to not spill anything she’s not supposed to. Instead, she takes a seat beside him, poking his leg. “So, is anything off limits? Or am I allowed to do anything I want with you?” She hears it once it’s hanging in the air and blushes, embarrassed. This is why she had a reputation for being a bad liar. “Not like _that_ \--- I --- You know what I meant.”

Laughing easily, Pacey feels a little less scared about seeing Andie already. “You’re the one doing me a favor. I mean, of course, you’re getting an open bar out of this deal. But, obviously we can just cover the basics, hand holding and an arm around you every so often.” Pacey shrugs, turning his head to look at Joey. “Any boundaries you want to set?”

“Oh,” Joey says, surprised he asked, even though she really shouldn’t be. “I mean, not really.” To be honest, she hadn’t been touched since breaking up with Dawson two months ago, and she was looking forward to it --- even if it was fake. “We should be okay, right? No awkwardness? We’re good enough friends, now, I think.”

Pacey nods, replying too quickly, “No awkwardness at all.”

She lets a moment of silence pass before gaining the courage to ask what’s been on her mind all day. “We don’t have to kiss, though, right?” She tries not to grimace, but she’s not very successful.

“Oh, obviously not! I wouldn’t do that to Andie,” Pacey assures her, clearing his throat, “And obviously it would be weird regardless. So yeah, no kissing. And _definitely_ no dancing.”

“Right, obviously,” Joey agrees with a nod. “Wait, no dancing at all? Not even a chicken dance?” she questions with raised eyebrows. “All you gotta do is ---” She begins to attempt to show Pacey the moves.

Pacey stands up abruptly, “None of that! Absolutely none of it.” His tone is serious, his grumpy side shining through yet again. “I know all of your instincts tell you to be as dorky as possible all the time, but god, no chicken dancing.”

The girl gasps dramatically. “I’m not dorky! I just have my quirks, thank you very much,” she defends. “What if I do it slowly? Slow-mo wings flapping. No one will know, I promise you.” She’s clearly teasing, but it’s so much fun to get him like this. She’s going to be way too amused with herself tonight. “It can be, like, our thing. Andie will totally be jealous.”

Pacey reaches out to hold her arms in an attempt to still them. “You’re a lot of work, Potter. Seriously.”

“Hey, you’re the one who chose to date me,” she teases with a grin.

His hands still on her bare arms, Pacey narrows his eyes at her ever so slightly. _This is going to be a long night._ “Save it for when we have an audience.”

She stands up with a shrug before tugging on one of Pacey’s suspenders with a teasing smile. “Will do, _babe_.”

“I hate you,” Pacey mumbles, fixing his suspender before leaving her room to check his hair in the mirror one more time.

* * *

“Remind me again how you guys know these people?” Joey asks as the four of them walk through the door of the hotel, with the pre party clearly already in full swing.

Jack straightens his tux. “First year of college. They were super close with…” He catches himself. “Well, all of us, I guess.”

“Me and Andie, they were close with me and Andie,'' Pacey corrects, his nerves getting the better of him. Andie was the whole reason any of them had even met the bride and groom. _Andie._ Half of him is frustrated that he has to play along with this fake dating ploy, but the other half is just happy to have Joey holding his arm so tightly. It’s sort of nice to feel supported, even if she’s only doing it for the open bar.

“Ah,” Joey says awkwardly. She’s never seen Pacey like this, all flustered with eyes shifting from one side of the room to the other. She’s hoping she can keep him tethered to reality with her grip.

Jen clears her throat, stuffing her hands into the pockets of her pantsuit. “Well, kiddos, I would stay and chat but that cute girl at the bar is totally checking me out right now.”

“No way,” Jack protests, head whipping around to fact check. “We’ve been here for, like, two minutes.”

“What can I say,” the blonde brags proudly with a shrug. “I’ll see you guys at our seats.” She throws them a wink and she’s gone.

Pacey can’t help but smile, even through his anxiety. “Typical,” He turns to Joey, “Jen’s always leaving me and Jack to fend for ourselves at these things.”

“Well, now that you’ve got a _girlfriend_ to keep you company, I plan on actually socializing with other people today,” Jack admits with a sarcastic smile. “I’m not a huge fan of third wheeling.”

Joey can’t help but roll her eyes. “Does that mean befriending the cute bartender, or what he’s serving?”

“Why not both?” Jack says with a mischievous grin as he walks away.

“Well,” Joey says as she pats Pacey’s arm. “You ready, Witter? Turn those heart eyes on.”

Pacey can’t help but scan the room for a certain blonde. He didn’t realize how anxious he was to see Andie, but now his heart is racing and he can’t stop worrying about what she’ll think of him and Joey. “I’m ready to be lowkey and just float under the radar, yeah.”

She throws him her best unimpressed look. “What’s the fun in that?”

“Because today isn’t about us, it’s about Nick and Jess getting married. And also about the open bar, always the open bar.” Pacey glances at Joey, “Aren’t you even a little nervous?”

She simply shrugs. “Not really.” She couldn’t really explain why she wasn’t --- probably because she didn’t have as much at stake as he did. She was surrounded by total strangers, so she could be whoever she wanted. It was a little exhilarating. “I just wanna have some fun tonight. I kinda feel like I’m overdue for it.” Joey’s been pretty cooped up ever since the break-up, trying to finish her unpacking, get properly settled in, and fully exorcise Dawson out of her life. The last “fun” thing she had done was being forced by her roommates to burn her copy of _ET_ , but other than that, this was her first night out since the incident. “On that note, yes, that open bar sounds promising.”

“I couldn’t agree more, _sweetheart_ ,” Pacey teases with a smile as they head in the direction of the bar. He’s about to jokingly promise to save a slow dance for Joey when he sees Andie at the bar, casually catching up with some redhead. Pacey feels his breath hitch at how beautiful she looks, with her hair curled and falling over her shoulders gently. She’s in a pretty purple dress and before Pacey can even catch his breath, she glances his way. Her whole face lights up and Pacey feels like he’s been punched in the gut. He whispers, almost incoherently, “That’s her, oh god.”

Joey knew something was wrong before Pacey even opened his mouth, with the way his face almost completely dropped. Her head whips up to try to catch an in-the-flesh glimpse of the famous ex-girlfriend she was being used to impress. She recognizes her from pictures in Jack’s room, but, damn, she’s even more gorgeous in person. She suddenly gets why this has been so hard for Pacey. She straightens her back, knowing that what she had been preparing for all the way over here was incoming. “Hey, it’s okay,” she whispers to Pacey as her hand slides down his arm to intertwine with his. “We got this.” She throws him an encouraging smile before getting into character and bursting out laughing. “Pace, you crack me up.”

Pacey paints on an awkward smile and keeps his eyes on Joey as Andie approaches them. “Pacey, hi!”

“Oh, Andie!” Pacey turns to her, pretending to be shocked. “I didn’t even see you, wow. You look amazing.”

Andie smiles admiringly at him and places a hand on his free arm in place of their usual hug. She smiles at Joey too, always so genuinely polite.

“Sweetheart,” Joey says, taking Pacey’s arm and wrapping it around her shoulders. “You gotta introduce me!”

Pacey glances at Joey, barely tearing his gaze from Andie. “Joey, this is Andie. Andie, this is Josephine… My…. Joey.” He can’t help but kick himself internally at how quickly he’s shoved his foot in his mouth.

Joey tries her best not to nudge him in the ribs. “I’m his girlfriend,” she says, trying to fix the mess he’s made of their plan in record time.

Andie nods, not as surprised as Joey thought she’d be. Jack had probably warned her over the phone before in order to not catch her completely off guard and hurt her feelings at a party. “Hi, Joey,” the blonde says with a friendly smile, reaching out to shake Joey’s hand. “Nice to meet you. Jack has told me so many amazing things about you!”

“Aw, thanks, Annie,” Joey says with a fake grin as she shakes Andie’s hand, and she can see Pacey furrow his brows. She throws him a quick look, _just go with it_.

“Sorry, it’s _Andie_ , actually,” Andie corrects her awkwardly.

“Andrew?”

“She very clearly said Andie,” Pacey says. “Andrew isn’t even close, Jo.”

“I’m so bad with names,” Joey explains fakely.

Andie chuckles, just a little uncomfortable. “It’s fine, don’t worry about it,” she says with a wave of her hand. “So, um, you’re their new roommate, hey? How’s that going for you?”

“Yeah, that’s me,” Joey replies, playing Pacey’s fingers in that obnoxiously cute way she sees couples do all the time. “It’s been great. Jack and Jen have been so nice, but this one…” she squeezes Pacey’s cheeks with her hand. “Moved in and from day one we could tell it was love, couldn’t we, honey?” She throws Pacey a look.

Pacey laughs nervously, nodding along and keeping his eyes on Joey. He couldn’t look at Andie right now. He hadn’t exactly expected her to openly be disappointed or anything, but she seemed so _happy_ about him moving on. It kind of hurt more that way. “Yeah, day one, Jo. It’s been… exciting.”

“Can’t even sleep, there’s just so much doing it.” Oops. Alright, Joey may be overdoing it now.

Pacey’s jaw practically drops and he turns to Andie now, forcing a smile. Andie looks just as frazzled as he feels.

“Well, um, it’s great to see you, Pacey. We’ll catch up after, yeah?”

“Of course, McPhee.” Pacey’s smile softens.

“Well, I’m gonna try to find Jack,” the blonde says, waving goodbye. “It was nice to meet you, Joey.”

“You too, Randie!”

“Andie.” Pacey corrects her one last time, watching Andie walk away.

Joey keeps Pacey’s arms around her just in case Andie looks their way, and throws him a smile. “I think that went well. Did she seem jealous?”

Pacey sighs, eyes still on Andie. “No, she seemed too happy. Like she was trying to hide being sad.” Every detail of their interaction ran through his head, instinctively worrying that somehow he’d managed to hurt Andie all over again.

“Do you think we played it up too much?” Joey asks, kind of scared to hear his answer. That had been fun, despite her worries that they were destined to fail miserably.

“I don’t know,” Pacey shrugs, turning to Joey now. “We won’t know until Jack updates us, probably. He’s who Andie would confide in about it… But the comment about all the ‘doing it’ was definitely too much, Potter.”

Joey smiles innocently. “Yeah, my bad, I got way too into it there.”

Pacey laughs emptily, eyes on the ground. “You’re nothing if not committed. Come on, let’s get those drinks.”

* * *

The ceremony was a long few hours, but Joey managed to keep herself entertained by teasingly petting Pacey whenever she saw Andie glance their way. Thankfully Jack and Jen offered buffers, but they basically had to keep their act up the whole time. Her hand started clamming up from holding onto his so much, so eventually she resorted to simply resting her head on his shoulder to watch the vows. She was not gonna tell a soul about how nice it felt to do that. Pacey was soft with her in a way she hadn’t predicted he’d be, and she was sinfully enjoying every minute of it.

Now in the reception hall, Pacey had a lot going on in his head. He’d always loved weddings --- the hopeless romantic that was buried in his cynical chest couldn’t deny how sweet it was to watch two people confess their devotion for each other in front of their family and friends. And with Joey holding his hand and laying her head on his shoulder, part of him wanted to be happy. And even if that part of his brain remembered that this was all fake, it was at least just enjoying the comfort. But a louder part of his brain couldn’t stop feeling guilty. Because every time Joey flaunted herself on his arm, he knew that meant that Andie was looking. And part of him wished he could’ve just been honest with her.

Now they were all stuck at a table together, pretending to enjoy the dry wedding cake.

“I think this was a bad idea,” Pacey admits to Jack and Joey a moment after Andie excused herself from their table. He gently pulled his hand away from Joey’s.

“What are you talking about? It’s going well, we’re all hanging out again and everything’s normal,” Jack argued lightly, glancing at Joey for backup.

All she can offer is a shrug. “I mean, I can’t really speak to how you guys were before. But I think we’ve been doing okay.” She puts her fork down, turning her eyes to meet Pacey’s. “What’s wrong? Am I ruining this?” It was hard for her not to assume she was the problem when that had always been Dawson’s excuse.

“No, you’re not ruining anything, it’s my fault. Flaunting some new, beautiful girlfriend in front of Andie...” Joey tries to mask her blush by taking a long swig of her drink. “It was such a childish idea. I feel so terrible,” Pacey admits, taking a deep breath and glancing in the direction that Andie went off in. “Maybe I should go talk to her.”

“What? No, Pace, you’re overthinking this,” Jack insists, sitting up.

Joey finishes her white wine. “Look, I’m not gonna pretend to understand your history with her, but from what you’ve told me, Pacey, I think you need this.”

“And what about what Andie needs?” Pacey asks quietly, looking at Joey with a semi-stern expression. “You don’t understand. Making her miserable wasn’t something I agreed to, okay? She just spent 9 months in Italy and is living this exciting life and I didn’t want to look like a loser but she…” Pacey sighs, his tone tougher than he intends. “Not all exes are as evil as yours, Joey.”

She just sits there with her mouth open in shock for a second. Joey hadn’t seen that coming, least of all from Pacey, who had been kind to her all night —- even if it was just pretend. She throws her hands up in defeat and purses her lips, not even being able to argue. He was right. “Alright, then. Whatever you want, Pace. I’m clearly only here to play along.”

Jack frowns at the both of them, clearly frustrated. “Now isn’t the time to resort to your typical bickering. Andie will be back soon.”

Pacey sighs, tossing his napkin on his plate of food. “What is with you, man? Since when do you poke your nose in me and Andie’s business?”

“Since you broke up and I was left to pick up the pieces,” Jack blurts out, keeping his voice low. Joey leans forward awkwardly, not really knowing how to react as the person sat in between them. She stabs her slice with her fork as Jack continues. “I don’t want to fight, Pacey, I just don’t want you to let yourself fall back into old habits.”

Pacey sighs. “Fine, then let’s not fight.” He pushes his chair out and starts to leave. “Jo, you’ve been relieved of your babysitting duties for the night.”

Joey sighs. “Pacey…” she says, but he’s already walked away. “Man, she really has a hold on him.”

Jack runs his hands through his face, clearly upset that his master plan wasn’t working anymore. “Joey, you have to help me out here.”

She furrows her brows, setting her fork back down. “What do you want me to do, Jack? I’m not gonna force myself onto him if he’s uncomfortable. We tried your plan, and I’m sorry it didn’t work, but maybe we just need to let the two of them figure their stuff out themselves.”

“I get that you weren’t here, Joey, but that’s already been said and done,” Jack tells her, his tone frustrated. “You wanna try and live with heartbroken Pacey? Because it’s not fun. He showers less, he comes home from work drunk, and your room is close enough to his that you’ll hear the drunk calls and him blasting Phoebe Bridgers.”

“Hey, I’ve heard some of her stuff, it’s not that bad.”

“It is when Pacey is wailing along to it,” Jack warns. “Look, just keep an eye out for them, please? Don’t let them be alone too long.”

“I’m sure they can have a normal conversation, Jack. You worry too much.” She turns around to see Pacey and Andie smiling together. “See? They look fine.”

As if on cue, she sees Pacey offer his hand to Andie and she hesitantly accepts. Pacey leads her onto the dance floor and rests his hands on her lower back. No one around them ever would’ve guessed that they were broken up, their bright smiles and close proximity enough to fool anyone.

Jack gives Joey the most unimpressed, I-Told-You-So look ever.

Just then, Jen finally decides to join them. “What up, Brady Bunch?” she says as she sets her plate down. She’s way too happy, so Joey guesses she definitely just got some with a bridesmaid in a closet somewhere. To answer her question, Jack simply points to the dance floor, and Jen dramatically gasps. “Joey, your boyfriend is cheating on you!”

Joey rolls her eyes. “You two are impossible. How come it’s all on me to save Pacey from heartbreak, huh? I just wanted to have fun tonight.”

“You’ve been having fun alright,” Jen says under breath before stuffing some cake into her mouth.

“Says you,” Joey retorts. “Your shirt is buttoned wrong, by the way.”

Jen blushes before quickly fixing it. Jack’s feet won’t stop tapping anxiously. Joey is close to losing it.

“Oh my god, _fine_ ,” she gives in, sliding her chair back and practically stomping towards the dance floor.

* * *

Pacey holds Andie close, not as close as he wants to, but dancing with her at all was enough for him. He’s missed her everyday since she left, and seeing her again only confirmed this. He watches her expression soften when she meets his eye, and she says the last thing he ever expects, “I’m so happy for you, Pace.”

Andie is smiling so sweetly, he knows she’s serious, even if she’s a little sad too. “Not to say I told you so, but… I told you you’d find someone better than me. Jack tells me she’s an English Major. Finally met a match for those romantic speeches of yours, huh? ”

“Andie…” Pacey tries, unable to find the words. “I’m sorry. I have to--”

“Why are you sorry? This is what I wanted, it really is.” Pacey searches her face for any hint that she’s lying, but he can’t. It’s another dagger in his chest. “Pace, when Jack told me that you had a new roommate who you couldn’t stop bickering with… I kind of saw this coming. The only thing I was unsure about was if you’d bring her today.”

“No, Andie. I have to tell you--” Pacey can’t take his eyes off her.

Andie interrupts, seemingly desperate to get the words out. “You’re braver than me, I couldn’t….” She trails off to find the right words. “I found someone too. But I couldn’t work up the nerve to bring him because I was worried about you. And I was too scared to even tell Jack, even after he told me about you and Joey last week. But I see the way she looks at you. This isn’t some rebound, this is a sign that we did the right thing.”

Pacey’s ears start ringing the moment she says she found someone. It takes everything in him to keep up the façade that he was okay. He felt like someone had just knocked the wind out of him. He wants to tell Andie that they didn’t do the right thing. He wants to tell her that he still loves her and that he was still more than willing to drop everything and follow her to Italy. But as he opens his mouth to tell her all of this, Andie’s eyes flicker toward someone behind him.

Just then Joey taps his shoulder, and greets him with a mock smile. “Hi, sweetie,” she says fakely before turning to Andie. “I’m so sorry, do you mind if I steal him from you for a minute? I’ll let you have him for the next dance, I know you guys have lots to catch up on.”

Andie is quick to tear her arms away from around Pacey’s neck. “Yeah, of course,” she says, straightening her dress. “I was getting a bit thirsty, anyways.”

“Great, thank you,” Joey says with a smile, and then she’s quick to pull Pacey away to the photo booth set up in the corner of the room, closing the curtain after pushing him in with her.

“Jo, what are you doing?”

“What are _you_ doing?” She echoes, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Well, I _was_ dancing with Andie ---”

“You know what I mean, Pace,” Joey cuts him off. “I thought you didn’t dance,” she reminds him before exhaling. “Why are you so against letting Andie go?”

Pacey sighs, the façade finally falling. He hangs his head and wrings his hands out in his lap, “Don’t think I have a choice in the matter anymore, so don’t worry about it, Potter.”

She sees his sudden change in attitude, and immediately feels kind of bad. She knew she shouldn’t have listened to Jack and Jen. But she’s here now. “What?”

“She’s got a new boyfriend in Italy,” He finally looks up at Joey, his eyes hard. “She can’t stop talking about how great it is that we’ve both moved on. Guess she’s happy that I’m not her problem any more.” He laughs emptily.

Joey’s heart breaks for him in that moment. “Pace…” She’s not quite sure what she can say. She knows how awful it is to know the person you love found someone else. “I’m really sorry,” she whispers, her hand on his shoulder supportively.

“Suddenly I’m glad she lives all the way in Italy.” Pacey drops his gaze to the floor. “Thank god for this stupid plan. I can’t imagine how much more depressing this would’ve been if I had to face her alone.” He glances up at her with a sad smile.

Joey has to let out a deep breath in order to even begin to process his words. She smiles back, but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “You’ll never be alone, Pacey. Not as long as you know us,” she assures him, the hand on his shoulder now petting his back softly.

“Thanks, Jo.” Pacey smiles at her more genuinely than he ever has before, suddenly realizing how close they were sitting, their shoulders pressed up against each other. But something was off in her smile, and without a word, he tilts his head to the side. He knows he doesn’t have to say anything to convey his question. _What’s wrong?_

She gets lost in his smile for a second, and all at once notices just how close his face really was to hers. Her eyes even glance down to his lips before she can catch herself, but thankfully he doesn’t seem to notice her moment of weakness. She instead forces herself to be brought back to harsh reality by shifting her hand away from his back and onto her lap. Pacey seems to be waiting for her to speak, knowing she’s holding something back, and she’s too weak to brush it off. “Um, about Andie…” The brunette trails off, not really sure how to handle this. “Look, it’s really not my place to tell you, but I think you should talk to her again. She might have some… news.”

Pacey furrows his brow, only more confused by her response, especially when her hand leaves his back. “What are you talking about, Potter?” His tone is almost teasing.

Throwing her hands up in her defense, Joey shakes her head. “That’s all you’re getting out of me. Like I said, not my place.” She finds his eyes and sighs. She wishes she could just fast forward through all this pain for him, but also sadly knows it’s never been that easy. “No matter what, though, I just… I need you to know that you’ll be okay. We’ll be here.” She gives him the most gentle smile she can muster before adding, “And if you ever need a fake girlfriend again, you always know who to call.”

Pacey laughs gently, unable to muster up anything more, even if Joey’s words made the tight feeling in his chest soften. Even on his worst days, Pacey knew how lucky he was to have his friends. His family was so complicated that it wasn’t possible for him to take his friends for granted. Even if he doesn’t express it enough. “Thanks, Jo. For everything. Don’t expect me to say it again, but I’m really glad Jen talked me into putting up with you.” He bumps his shoulder into hers.

That actually gets a laugh out of her. “Wow, thanks, Pace. Ever the sweetheart,” she teases, bumping him back. “No wonder it’s so easy to pretend to be in love with you,” she adds mockingly.

“Quite the unpopular opinion,” Pacey mumbles, and Joey slaps his arm with a roll of her eyes. “Sorry,” He adds with a smile.

They’re interrupted by a knock on the outside of the photo booth. “Are you guys done in there, or what?” A stranger’s voice yells from the other side of the curtain.

The Witter in him jumps out, and Pacey leans over Joey toward the curtain before calling out, “Cool it, buddy, my _girlfriend_ wants to commemorate this glorious day!” Pacey hits the green button in front of them without another thought, glancing at Joey awkwardly.

Her eyes meet his and she instantly grins, proud of herself for getting Pacey even a little bit out of his funk. “I guess we’re doing this,” Joey says, actually pretty pleased with this turn of events. She’s quick to go for the most cliché pose ever, sticking her tongue out and sliding bunning ears behind Pacey’s head. He scrunches up his nose in fake disgust, turning his head to face the camera. When the camera clicks and the flash goes off, they’re left cursing under their breath. Pacey turns to look at Joey instinctively, laughing at how desperately she was blinking.

Once her eyes focus again, Joey is quick to move. She’s had this one planned all night as she hoped they would end up in here together eventually. “Lighten up, Grumpy Pants,” she says as she reaches over and uses her fingers to force Pacey’s mouth into a smile to match her own before he can protest. _Click._

Pacey rolls his eyes at her sarcastically before taking the initiative this time. He reaches his arm around Joey’s shoulders to cover her eyes with his hand. He cheeses hard at the camera, eyes closed for safety from the flash.

Joey can’t do anything but laugh as Pacey covers her eyes, happy to know that she finally got him to ease up. She hears the click of the camera to let them know they had three seconds to pick another pose. Before Pacey has a chance to do anything, in a moment of panic Joey’s hands wrap around his face and bring his cheek to her lips. She places a soft kiss as the camera flashes, then makes every effort to not let it linger too long. “Just in case Andie sees it,” she quickly explains, hoping that she wasn’t blushing too hard thanks to her moment of impulse.

All Pacey could do was smile as Joey kissed his cheek, but the moment it’s over he feels something shift in him. Something that’s been there since the day they met, but was too new for him to notice. Too new and overshadowed by his heartbreak over Andie. But something about this moment makes him feel it at full force. For a minute, Pacey isn’t thinking about Andie. He isn’t wishing things were different, or that he was different. All he can think about is the fact that everything that’s happened to him in his miserable life has led him here. He can feel his eyes softening as he looks at Joey with no filter, just admiration.

Joey is fighting the butterflies in her stomach, focusing solely on her last pose. Out of ideas, she settles on a peace sign and an over the top grin as the camera finally flashes for the last time. She hears the machine instantly process their pictures, whirring loudly as it works to give them the finished products. Joey excitedly turns her face to find Pacey staring at her, eyes softer than she’d seen them all night. “What?” she’s quick to ask, suddenly panicked.

Pacey laughs awkwardly, turning his head away from Joey when she questions him. He shrugs, remembering where they were. “Nothing. Just thinking about how you should get a head start back to the table because I know whatever it is that you know about Andie, you definitely got from Jack. So you should warn him that I’m going to grill him.” Pacey makes sure to lay the sarcasm on heavy, so she knew he was just messing around.

She chuckles at that, before hearing their photo booth strips finally be delivered. Joey is quick to make a grab at them, handing one to Pacey with a smile. “One for me and one for you. So we can always remember what a great couple we can pretend to be,” she jokes with her tongue out. She draws the curtain back, finally stepping out to face what she guessed was the stranger that yelled at them before. She throws him an innocent smile as she starts making her way back to her table.

Taking a moment to trace his finger over the photo strip gently, Pacey eventually follows Joey out of the booth. He doesn’t spare a glance at the asshole who’d rushed them, and instead he smiles to himself at the sight of Joey ahead of him. Telling himself it was part of their act, Pacey speeds up, passing Joey smoothly and grabbing her free hand to pull her toward their table. When he sees Andie sitting there and chatting with Jack and Jen, he still feels a familiar sting in his chest --- and he wakes up a bit from whatever spell the photo booth had put him under, still holding Joey’s hand tightly in his. But he does shove the photo strip in his pocket without a second thought.

Joey avoids Jen’s raised brows as they sit back down, and sets her strip neatly into her purse. She looks over at Pacey and realizes she left a lipstick chain on his cheek, her face instantly becoming hot at the sight. She’s quick to wipe it away before throwing everyone at the table an embarrassed smile. “Did we miss anything?”

Jack and Jen exchange one of their classic looks before Jack speaks up, clearly scrambling for something to say. “Just the Cupid Shuffle.”

Pacey feels his face flush at the way everyone had averted their eyes away from him and Joey when they noticed the lipstick stain. Out of habit, he looks up at Andie first. She smiles when she meets his eye, and even if there’s the smallest bit of sadness hidden underneath it, he can tell she means it. She finally takes the initiative to speak. “Actually, I was just telling Jack and Jen that after this next semester, I’m coming home!”

Joey tries her best not to wince as the news she’s been dreading finally comes out. Jack and Jen smile convincingly, both glancing at Pacey. He feels everyone’s eyes on him and it’s unbearable. But he smiles as genuinely as he can, just happy that Andie seems happy. He pushes his feelings aside the best he can. “You’ll be home for Christmas? That’s great, McPhee.”

Joey knows he’s got his guard up, and she’s mad that all the work she put in to liven up his spirits in that photo booth are so quickly shattered. Remembering that his hand is still in hers, she squeezes it lightly in support.

“Yeah,” Andie replies, her smile unwavering. “I mean, I love Italy and I’ll probably go back eventually, but I felt like it was time to come home for a bit.”

“Your parents’ll be so happy to have their favorite kid back in the states. Especially for her favorite holiday,” Pacey teases without missing a beat, glancing at Joey to give her a sad smile. A silent _thank you._

“I’m excited to get to know you better,” Joey says as her eyes meet Andie’s, and she’s genuine. There was a reason this girl was so important to Pacey, and she shared the McPhee blood Joey had grown so fond of through Jack. She genuinely thought the two of them could maybe be friends, if this messy situation ever became normal. “ _Andie_ ,” she adds, and the blonde throws her a smile for finally getting her name right.

Andie’s phone rings on the table before she can reply. Pacey notices a familiar twinkle in her eye, and he knows it’s her boyfriend calling before she even says it. “It’s Will, I’ll be right back.”

Andie excuses herself, throwing everyone a sheepish smile. Pacey watches her go, as a slow song starts to play. He lets himself wallow in self-pity for a short moment as all the happy couples flock to the dance floor. But then his eyes fall on Joey. She’s watching the dance floor too and he can’t help but feel bad. She’s fresher out of a breakup than he is, and all she wanted was to have fun today --- but instead she got stuck babysitting him. Pacey glances down at their hands, still intertwined on his thigh.

He stands up abruptly, tugging on her gently, “Come on.”

“What?” Joey asks, but she’s already following him without a second thought. “Pacey Witter, do you actually want to _dance_?” she teases.

Pacey leads her to the dance floor, ignoring Jack and Jen’s shocked expressions. “What kind of fake boyfriend would I be if we just sat there all night?” He teases back, stopping once he steps foot on the dance floor and turning to face her. But, a wave of apprehension washes over him when he looks into her big brown eyes. Suddenly, the thought of holding her close seems like a _terrible_ idea. So, he lets go of her hand and starts nodding his head to the music with a playfully serious expression on his face. He brings his hands up and very slowly, and starts doing the chicken dance.

Joey watches with a confused expression, but as soon as she realizes what he’s doing, she bursts into laughter. “Oh my god,” she exclaims with a shake of her head. She stares at him for a minute with the biggest smile on her face before joining him with a slow motion flapping of her wings.

Still at the table, Jack leans over to Jen, “What is happening right now?” He watches as Joey and Pacey laugh together and do the slow chicken dance, totally on beat with the overly romantic song playing throughout the reception hall.

“Honestly, I have no idea,” Jen laughs. “But it looks fun.” She holds out her hand so Jack can take it.

“Seriously?” he asks with a chuckle.

Jen nods. “Why not?” Jack finally takes her hand and follows her to the dance floor, joining Pacey and Joey, who instantly smiles.

“Hi, my little chicks,” Jen teases. “May we join you?”

“Why, of course,” Joey answers, her cheeks hurting from smiling so widely.

Pacey laughs, too caught up in the absolute stupidity of their actions to even roll his eyes. He glances at Jack, who seems hesitant to join in. Pacey pats his arm gently, “Come on, Jackers, you’re a much better dancer than the rest of us. Show us up.”

Jack chuckles, fully aware that Pacey was full of shit. Nevertheless, Jack steals Joey’s current move, slowly extending his neck forward while flapping his wings. Jack glances at Pacey and mouths, genuinely, “Sorry.”

Mid-hand flap, Pacey simply shrugs. He couldn’t be bothered to hold a grudge over what he knew was just Jack looking out for him. The four roommates stay committed to their slow-mo chicken dance, grinning together until the slow song fades out.

* * *

Jack drives them back home way too late at night, with Pacey in the passenger’s seat and the girls in the back. Jen’s head is on Joey’s shoulder, since she passed out about two minutes into the car ride. There’s a soft song playing on the radio, and Joey hasn’t been this content in a really long time. She gently reaches into her purse for her chapstick, and sees her photo booth strips tucked neatly where she left them. She barely had time to check them out in all the craziness that transpired through the night.

She dragged Jack and Jen there too, and their stupid poses bring the biggest smile to her face. Jen had kissed her cheek in one, while Jack had opted for the props outside the booth, and used a moustache and a top hat. She couldn’t wait to hang these up in her room, and she was infinitely grateful that she had found such great people to share her new home with.

In the bottom of her stack was the strip with Pacey, and her smile brightens even more at the sight of it. She loves seeing him slowly get less grumpy and open up with each picture, and he genuinely looks happy to be with her. However, the last rectangle catches her by surprise. She had assumed he’d done an individual pose like her, but now that she finally had time to see the finished product, Joey notices that all he was doing was looking at her when the flash went off. And not in the way he usually did, where he’s dumbfounded or confused, but almost like it was… admiration. Maybe even…?

She pushes the thought out of her head quickly. Surely, she was looking way too into it.


	4. Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Christmas time in the loft and Joey and Pacey are the only two not going home for the holidays.
> 
> content warning for alcohol mentions

Joey is just about to finish up her makeup when she hears a knock on her bedroom door. “Come in!”

Pacey pokes his head in and flashes her with that goofy grin of his. “Hey, Potter, your date’s here.”

She panics, scrambling through her cosmetics. “What? He wasn’t supposed to show up for another few hours!” 

Just then she sees Audrey come up behind him and plop herself on her bed with a grin. Joey instantly rolls her eyes at Pacey, throwing a used makeup wipe at his face. “Jerk.”

Pacey sarcastically flinches away, grinning at her teasingly. “Somebody has to keep you on your toes. Now hurry up so you can help Jack and Jen in the kitchen, they’re a disaster.”

“Y’know, Pacey,” Audrey chimes in, already snuggling one of Joey’s pillows. “ _You_ could always help them in the kitchen.”

Joey joins in for a gang up. “Exactly. _I_ have a guest,” she adds with a smirk.

“I’m in charge of drinks, not food.” Pacey retorts, already shutting the door. “Just hurry up, Potter.”

“Then you can fix me some rum and coke, can’t you, darling?” Audrey yells before Pacey fully leaves them alone. She makes herself comfortable on Joey’s bed, laying on her stomach with her feet up behind her. “So, have you and him given in to your intense sexual tension yet?” she asks, eyebrows raised.

Joey scoffs. “Come on, Audrey. How many times do I have to tell you this? It would be too complicated.”

“So you’re saying you _don’t_ want to jump his bones?”

“Jesus,” Joey replies, face scrunched in over-the-top disgust. 

“Oh, come on, bunny, you can be real with me. It’s just us gals,” the blonde promises with a mischievous grin. “Well, unless Pacey is holding a cup to the door right now, which I wouldn’t put past him.”

Joey laughs, her cheeks a little flushed at this certain conversation topic. She busies herself by applying mascara. “I don’t know why you’re so fixated on this, Audrey.”

“Because life is _boring_ , Joey,” her best friend answers with a dramatic grunt. “And you have been my one source of entertainment these past few months. I mean, not to disregard your broken heart or anything, because I know that sucked, but come on! You moved into this great new apartment with new people --- one which you could very well be canoodling with if you wanted to --- and you expect me _not_ to pry? You should know me better by now. I’m offended.”

“You’re a handful sometimes, you know that?”

“It’s why you love me. Now come on, spill.”

Joey sighs, putting down her mascara bottle to turn around and face Audrey. With a roll of her eyes, she finally gives in to her best friend’s insistence. “Okay, fine, Pacey and I _may_ have shared some… _moments_ when we went to that wedding together.”

Audrey’s face instantly lights up. “Ha, I knew it! I _knew_ you two were hiding something between all that bickering.”

“Shut up,” Joey is quick to say, despite her chuckles. “It was months ago! And it wasn’t anything big. I’m… Well, I’m trying not to think too hard about it since, you know, we _were_ pretending to be dating and all.”

“Oh, sure, excuses, excuses.” Audrey waves her off as she readjusts her sitting position so she can listen more intently. “Did you guys kiss or something?”

“No, God, no,” Joey instantly answers. “We just… I don’t know. We had fun, and we had some… intimate conversations.” She rolls her eyes at Audrey’s face. “But it wasn’t that big of a deal! The moments passed and we haven’t really talked about it since.”

“Wow, I can’t believe you like him. You really like that _schleb_ ,” Audrey says, her nose scrunched in complete disbelief.

“I never said that!” Joey defends. “I just said we had a nice time together. He made me feel…”

“What, disgusted?”

Joey rolls her eyes, though a smile creeps through. “No. He made me feel… safe? I don’t know.” She shakes her head, pushing the thought away. “Whatever. It’s not like anything will happen, not now, and probably not ever. He’s still getting over Andie, and I’m finding my place in the world after Dawson, and… it would just be too complicated. I’m probably looking way into moments of weakness. Or overly dedicated acting.”

“Joey, _I’m_ supposed to be the actress of this duo. So you can’t hide behind that excuse.”

“Well, can we drop this?” Joey pleads, her hands up in self-defense. “I don’t wanna think about Pacey right now. He’s not interested --- I live with him, I can tell. I saw the way he looked at Andie at that wedding, and he definitely doesn’t look at me like that.” She picks up her blush, finding something else to focus on. “Besides, I have a date tonight. _That’s_ what we should focus on.”

“You’re right. That’s why I’m here, anyways,” Audrey agrees, letting the subject drop to Joey’s relief. She gets up from the bed and goes straight for the closet, because of course she does. “What are you wearing? Do we get Slutty Joey or Romantic Joey tonight?”

“Why would I want to be _Slutty Joey_?” the brunette asks, eyebrows furrowed at the nickname. “I met this guy, like, two weeks ago in an English class. I wanted to try to branch out and bring a date to this loft Christmas party. I’m not putting out, Audrey, so go call off whatever bet you have.”

Audrey chuckles as she rummages through Joey’s clothes. “Alright, fine, but you’re gonna need to find me another way to snatch ten bucks from Jen, then.”

* * *

In the kitchen, Jen and Jack are trying their best not to set anything on fire.

“Pace, could you check on the mac and cheese in the oven?” Jack asks as he approaches. “I’ve needed to pee for, like, ten minutes now.”

“Sure thing, Jackers. Go relieve that bladder.” 

“You know…” Jen pipes up as soon as Jack leaves, “You could still come with Jack and I to New York for the holidays. We don’t _have_ to see your family. We’ll sneak around them like we’re your Protection Program or something.” 

Pacey smiles. “Don’t worry about it, Lindley. I’m fine right here.”

“You know that Joey is staying, too, right?”

“Oh yeah?” Pacey fakes disinterest as he opens the oven and pretends he knows what checking on food means. 

“Yep. She says it’s too soon for her to go back home and possibly run into Dawson.”

“Smart.”

“And that has _no_ influence over your decision?” Jen pries, eyebrows raised with a smirk.

Pacey tries not to roll his eyes. “Why would it?”

“Oh, no reason,” she replies as she shrugs, but her mischievous little grin only grows.

Pacey closes the oven and turns to Jen. “Don’t be all weird. I’m working the holiday shifts at the bar, we’ve known this for months.” 

“Sure. But you just seem so…” Jen sets the last plate down and gesticulates vaguely. “You’re not as grumpy as you usually are this time of year.”

“Yeah, because there’s no dread leading up to Christmas --- I don’t have to travel during the busiest time of year to see my less than appreciative family. I’m finally letting myself off the hook, it’s freeing.” Pacey shrugs, leaning on the counter now, eyes scanning over all the snacks. 

“You can free yourself from your family and still come celebrate with mine.” Jen smiles softly now. Pacey smiles back at her and just nods.

No matter how messy Jen’s family was, her and Grams had always welcomed Pacey to their holiday celebrations. He’d tried it a couple times, and it was nice. But, he knew that if he flew all the way to New York and didn’t see his family, he’d feel guilty. Even if they didn’t miss him, he’d beat himself up over being a bad brother and a worse son. It didn’t make sense after how his family (minus Gretchen) had treated him his whole life, but that was just the way Pacey’s brain worked. He didn’t need to burden his friends with all this during the holidays, so he told them he was working all day on Christmas Day. Which was partially true, but he was really only going in for a few hours during the day. Joey staying in LA sort of defeats the purpose of Pacey lying for the last few weeks, but he’ll just have to figure something out.

“Is the mac and cheese all good, Pace?” Jack asks as he returns with his now empty bladder.

“Everything is bueno, Chef McPhee.” Pacey kisses his fingertips theatrically. 

“Did you convince him?” Jack whispers in Jen’s ear, not at all subtly.

Jen sighs dramatically. “He’s impenetrable, what can I say?”

Pacey nods his head, “Ah, it all makes sense now. This is one of those Jack-and-Jen Missions. I told you guys months ago that I’d be working Christmas Day.” He busies himself in the fridge, as if it would look any different than twenty minutes ago. 

“I think _months_ ago is an exaggeration,” Jen retorts, bumping into his shoulder lightly as she goes to grab extra napkins. “But fine, stick to your drunks and your curly fries. See if I care.” She throws him her tongue to make sure he knows she’s kidding.

“More of Grams’ delicious food for me,” Jack adds with a grin.

“And colder weather, New York tourists, and the chilling knowledge that you’re in the same city as my family,” Pacey adds as he shoots Jen a jokingly scared expression. 

“What a long-winded way to say ‘Bah Humbug!” Jack jokes as he carefully takes the mac and cheese out of the oven. 

“Damn, what smells so good?” Audrey exclaims as she walks into the kitchen, taking a seat in one of their stools.

“That would be the famous McPhee Mac and Cheese over here,” Jack says proudly with a grin.

“God, you guys are gonna make me so fat tonight,” Audrey says, mouth salivating as she looks over all the food. “If you guys cooked like this all the time, I would come over _way_ more often."

“And that’s exactly why we _don’t_ cook like this more often.” Pacey mutters, grabbing a beer from the fridge. Audrey rolls her eyes at him and throws a pretzel at his head. 

“Where’s Joey? Is she still not ready?” Jen asks.

Audrey shakes her head. “She’s picking out shoes still. Which is stupid, because she knows she’s gonna pick the ones I laid out for her anyways, but you know Jo. Stubborn little thing, that girl.”

“Don’t we know it,” Jack agrees with a chuckle. 

Almost on cue, Joey’s high heels clack on their wooden floor and she finally approaches the gang with a smile. “Alright, thoughts?” She was wearing a dark green dress that stopped just short of her knee, and a light white sweater for warmth. She kept her hair down, knowing her roommates would force her to put on a Santa hat at some point in the night. She was most excited about her cute little Christmas earrings she found at a market a few days ago, one with a tiny Santa, and one with a tiny Mrs. Claus. “It’s not too much or too little, right?”

At the sound of Joey’s voice, Pacey runs a hand over his ugly Christmas sweater subconsciously. He never took these parties seriously and was suddenly regretting it, not that he could admit it to himself. Pacey bites his bottom lip subtly, tearing his eyes away from his very beautiful roommate. Suddenly, he's a little too interested in how the mac and cheese came out. 

“You’re just right, Goldilocks,” Jack grins, earning groans from both Audrey and Pacey. Jen laughs and agrees, “Joey, you look beautiful!”

“Of course she does, I dressed her,” Audrey claims with a toss of her hair, to which Joey can’t help but chuckle. 

Jen comes over to squish Joey’s cheek lovingly before asking, “So, who is this guy you’re so dressed up for, Jo?”

“His name’s AJ, he’s in my English Lit class,” Joey answers, trying not to blush at everyone listening to her. “But it really isn’t anything serious, I promise. This is our first actual, maybe date.”

“And you chose to bring him here? To meet _us_? Poor guy,” Jack teases.

“That’s what _I_ said,” Audrey agrees, and the two of them share a laugh.

Joey sighs, though she can’t not grin at her friends being so close already. “Why should I have to worry? It’s not like you guys aren’t gonna be on your _best_ behaviour, right?”

Pacey turns around to face the group fully again, asking sarcastically, “Best behavior? At our loft Christmas party? Raise your hand if you got too drunk and threw up last year.”

Jack and Jen both scowl, raising their hands in shame. Jen quickly pipes up, “The only reason you didn’t is cause Andie was keeping you out of trouble.”

“Even more reason for me to go crazy this year.” Pacey jokes, barely glancing in Joey’s direction. 

She pouts. “ _Please_ , guys. This is my first date since Dawson.”

“Not true,” Jack retorts, and Joey throws him a questioning look. He smiles mischievously. “Pacey took you to that wedding.”

Joey rolls her eyes. “You know that doesn’t count.”

“Obviously,” Pacey adds too quickly, giving Jack a dirty look. “And I didn’t take her, _you_ orchestrated the whole thing because you can’t mind your own business.”

Jack simply shrugs, still smiling like he’s enjoying this way too much. Exasperated, Joey brings the conversation back. “Hello? Earth to 4D! Your desperate roommate needs confirmation of sanity!”

“Yes, Jo, you have our word,” Jen promises, eyes narrowing at the boys. Jack salutes dramatically. 

“You’re the boss.” Pacey deadpans as he eats a pretzel from the bowl on the counter. Joey finally allows herself to smile triumphantly.

“God, I really wish you guys threw this party on actual Christmas so I would have an excuse to not see my parents,” Audrey complains theatrically. Clearly the conversation had been off of her for way too long. “Now that I think of it, why _aren’t_ you?”

“Jack and I are visiting Grams in New York for Christmas,” Jen answers easily. “Maybe you can convince these two to kidnap you, though.” Her head points to Joey and Pacey.

Audrey’s eyes instantly widen, flashing her open mouth at Joey. “Wait, you two are gonna be alone in the loft all Christmas?” Joey knows her friend is silently screaming at her for not sharing this information until now. 

“I just thought it was too early to go back to Capeside, is all,” she defends with a shrug. 

“And I got stuck with 12 hour shifts on Christmas Eve _and_ Christmas Day.” Pacey lies easily, glancing at Joey, “I’ll barely be around, you’ll have the place to yourself.” 

His lie was really getting ahead of him, but that was a problem for Future Pacey. Right now, the loaded look Audrey was giving Joey was enough to keep him preoccupied. 

“Well, Jo, you’re welcome to come to New York with us if you don’t want to be stuck here with this Scrooge,” Jack offers for the hundredth time. God, Pacey wishes she would take them up on their offer. 

“It’s okay, really,” Joey is quick to say. “I have some readings I should do.”

“That’s our Jo,” Audrey teases. “Ever the little bookworm. But, hey, I’ll be in town. And if Pacey makes a single move on you, you can call me anytime to come over and kick his ass.”

“As far as I’m concerned, Joey’s interrupting _my_ plan to be left alone during the worst time of the year, but your silly little threats do make me laugh, Audrey,” Pacey quips, “Like I said, I’ll be at the bar most of the weekend anyway.”

Audrey was just about to get up from her seat to make Pacey put his money where his mouth is, but a knock on the door interrupts her. 

“Oh, God,” Joey says under her breath. She throws everyone another evil glare before finally opening up the door. “Hi,” she says sweetly, greeting AJ with a hug. “I’m glad you could make it.”

Jack, Jen, and Audrey crane their necks to try and sneak a peek at Joey’s date. Jack and Jen exchange a couple of their freaky telepathic glances. Pacey rolls his eyes and goes back into the fridge to busy himself, pretending as if he wasn’t curious about this AJ guy too. 

“Of course,” AJ replies as Joey takes his coat. “Wow. You look amazing.”

Joey blushes a little despite her best efforts. “Thank you. So do you.”

Her date chuckles, running a nervous hand through his hair. “I brought beer. You said your roommates like that, right?”

“Ah.” Joey laughs. “Yes, you shall be greeted with a warm welcome when you present those. I hope.”

She hears Jack clear his throat dramatically from the kitchen.

“Speak of the devils,” the girl mumbles with a roll of her eyes, leading AJ into the house. “Hey guys, this is AJ. AJ, these are my roommates, Jen, Jack, and Pacey. And this is my best friend Audrey.”

Audrey and Jen wave, both grinning, as Jack shakes AJ’s hand quickly so he can go back to snacking. Pacey closes the fridge and looks the guy over before offering his hand. He can’t help but smile to himself at how geeky this guy seems already. “Hey,” Pacey finally shakes his hand. 

Just as Audrey opens her mouth to make one of her brutally honest comments, Jack’s phone buzzes loudly in his pocket. No one pays any mind to it --- that is, until Jack makes it everyone’s problem and basically has to stop himself from using every curse word known to the English language. 

“Jeez, Jack, did you see a pair of boobs on there or something?” Jen jokes, and there’s a few chuckles. 

“What’s up, Jackers?” Pacey asks before taking a sip of his beer.

“Okay,” Jack whispers to himself, pacing back and forth on the kitchen floor nervously. “Alright, I just want everyone to think back to a time where they really messed up. And I want them to think of how people reacted and how they _wish_ people had reacted.” 

Joey narrows her eyes. “What did you do?”

“You _especially_ have to promise not to get mad, Jo,” Jack says through a grimace. “You too, Pace.” 

Pacey glances at Joey, furrowing his brow. “What did you do?” Pacey repeats Joey’s question very slowly.

“I invited Andie to the party,” he finally admits with a wince. Pacey’s jaw drops.

“ _What?_ ” Joey asks, exasperated, fully forgetting that she has a clueless date by her side.

Jen brings a hand to her forehead. “Oh my god, I _told_ you that was a horrible idea.”

“Pacey’s ex?” Audrey asks, turning to Joey with eyebrows raised and a smile that looked like she was way too excited about this news. “From _that_ wedding? The one where you and Pacey…?” Joey gives her a death glare but her best friend still smirks.

“I didn’t think she’d actually come! She was supposed to go to Denver to meet Will’s family, but they decided to come see me first.” Jack explains, still pacing.

“ _They?_ ” Pacey asks quickly, more frustrated than anything. This was seriously going to mess with his plan to have a stress-free Christmas.

“I’m sorry, Pace,” Jack says genuinely. “I can ask her not to come or something.”

“What? No way, Jack, she came here just to see you and introduce you to this new boyfriend, it’s fine. Really.” Pacey takes another sip of his beer before continuing. “We just have to figure out what we’re telling her about…” His gaze falls on Joey, and her date.

Jen laughs, covering her mouth. “I’m sorry. This isn’t funny, it isn’t but… Jack, you’re so screwed. You never...” She turns to Joey, “Jack never broke you and Pacey up.”

Joey instantly looks over to Jack, who just gives her a fake desperate smile in return. She covers her face in her hands. “This can’t be happening.”

“You said we broke up in September!” Pacey chimes in, eyes wide. “You are such a dumbass.”

“Ah! Dumbass jar!” Jen points at Jack triumphantly. Jack loves bragging about barely having to contribute to their ongoing punishment jar. 

“Absolutely. Twenty bucks, now,” Joey orders, hands on her hips.

As Jack groans and fishes into his pockets, AJ finally speaks, surprising most of the group who had already kind of forgotten about him, “You and Pacey dated?”

Joey turns to him and quickly whispers, “No!”

Meanwhile Pacey practically shouts, “No!” over her softer response. 

Jen widens her eyes and glances at Audrey, who looks just as amused.

“It’s, um…It’s complicated.” Joey sighs. “You know what, I’m so sorry, AJ, but I think Jack, Pacey and I just need a moment to figure things out. Jen? Would you show AJ around for a bit, maybe?”

“Of course,” Jen says, putting her arm through AJ’s, who just smiles politely. 

Joey then throws a look at Audrey, who takes a second, but finally gets the hint. “Oh! Uh, yeah, I’ll go, too. I’ve really only seen Joey’s bedroom, I guess.”

They disappear down the hall and Joey wastes no time to slap Jack lightly on the arm. “I can’t believe you just forgot to tell me this before I brought a _date_ to this thing! Andie is gonna think I’m a monster for parading a guy around when I was supposed to be in love with Pacey, like, a month ago!” 

“Maybe I should go? If we tell Andie I’m working or something, it won’t be so bad?” Pacey’s attempt at getting out of this falls flat. He doesn’t even hesitate to continue, “Or we could just say I dumped you.”

“ _You_ dumped _Joey_?” Jack questions, and Joey can’t help but smile. 

“Hey, it could happen!” Pacey protests. “Me dumping Joey means she has every right to parade her new boyfriend around, especially if I tell Andie that I’m happy for her or whatever.”

“Okay, you know what?” Joey snaps, running her hands through her hair. “I don’t care what you guys do, but figure it out. I have a date waiting for me.” Before leaving, she points a finger at the both of them. “And do _not_ make me the bad guy. I still wanna be Andie’s friend, god willing.” She walks away to find AJ and try to somehow explain this mess and keep him around.

Pacey just groans, giving Jack the dirtiest look he could muster. “You owe me for this. Big time.”

Jack stands there and watches his friends walk away with a sigh. “I love you guys!” He yells in a moment of desperation, to no replies. “Yeah, okay, I deserve that.”

* * *

Thankfully, the party isn’t a total disaster, and doesn’t involve a dramatic meltdown, much to Audrey’s dismay. A good amount of people show up, bringing plenty of treats and presents along with them. AJ waves the whole Joey-Pacey mess aside easily, saying he knows what it’s like to have crazy roommates, which makes Joey smile. He makes easy conversation with everyone, and she’s proud of herself for managing to bring a good guy over. 

Andie shows up with her boyfriend about an hour into their fun, and everyone tries their best to keep it together and normal. Jack takes her aside almost instantly and Joey watches out of the corner of her eye as the blonde nods and then goes along with the night as if nothing happened. She’s almost jealous of how easily she handled that.

They play a few rounds of Christmas themed games, and Joey wipes the floor at Christmas Movie Pictionary with Audrey and AJ on her team. They play cliche Holiday music, and as the night goes on and they get drunker and drunker, they eventually pull out the hats and antlers for photos and goofing around. The snacks get eaten and the laughs get louder, and Andie almost cries at Jack perfectly executing their family mac and cheese recipe. The night is almost… too good. But Joey is way too buzzed and filled with Holiday cheer to anticipate the probability of madness. She just tries to enjoy it all as much as she can. 

She watches as Andie gets up from the living room and goes off to the kitchen to grab something to drink, and Joey is way too tipsy to stop herself from following her.

“Hey,” She says, plopping herself down on a stool. “Thank you for coming tonight. I hope you’re having fun.”

Andie turns around to throw her a smile. “Thanks, Joey. Yeah, absolutely. I’ve missed everyone a lot, and it seems like you fit right in.”

“Do you think so? I think so, too.” Joey flashes a grin. 

“Oh, totally. You seem like a great person,” Andie assures her before taking a sip of water.

Joey smiles, but then instantly remembers the situation they’re in and pouts instead. “Andie. Come here,” she whispers.

Andie furrows her brows, but she follows orders. 

“Do you think I’m a slut?” Joey asks once she’s close enough.

“What?” Andie quickly questions. “No, of course not.”

“I really want you to like me,” the brunette drunkenly admits. “I’m sorry that I brought a date tonight.”

“You have nothing to worry about,” Andie assures her with a soft expression. “I like you. And you shouldn’t apologize, you can do whatever you want.”

“I promise that Pacey and I are on good terms.” Joey has to fight her drunkenness extra hard to be able to not spill the beans.

Andie smiles. “I can see that. I’m glad. Though I’m not gonna lie, it is a little bit shocking to hear.”

“What, that we dated?”

“No, that you broke up,” Andie admits, taking a seat on the stool next to Joey’s, who looks puzzled. 

“Why?”

“Well… I don’t know.” Andie sighs. “I thought you guys looked pretty happy at the wedding.”

Joey smiles at the thought. “We did, didn’t we?” She reaches for a chip. “He was pretty convincing.” Joey almost yelps, covering her mouth instantly. 

“What do you mean by that?” Andie questions with raised brows.

Joey simply shakes her head and stuffs her mouth with more chips. “Nothing. I said nothing.”

“You know, Joey, maybe _you_ should take this,” Andie offers with a chuckle, giving Joey her water bottle. 

Joey’s hand flies to her heart. “Aw, Andie…” For some reason the gesture is so touching to the intoxicated girl. She takes the bottle before wrapping her arms around the other. “You’re so sweet, you know that?”

“Thank you,” the blonde says with a laugh, hugging Joey back. “So are you.”

“Pacey certainly has good taste,” Joey whispers with a wink as she pulls away, hands patting Andie’s pretty blonde locks lovingly. 

“Let’s get you back to the living room, shall we?” Andie offers with her hand outstretched. Joey takes it with a smile and lets herself be led back to the group, where everyone is fighting over which version of _The Grinch_ is the best.

Joey takes a seat on the couch and catches Pacey’s eyes from across the room. He raises his brows to wordlessly ask her what she was doing with Andie, to which Joey throws him a thumbs up and not much else.

* * *

Later on in the night, Pacey’s out on their tiny balcony with a cup of whatever fruity punch that Joey had made for the party. He couldn’t deny how tasty it was, and didn’t want to think about how much alcohol was in it. But he hadn’t gotten nearly as drunk as he expected, so he was settling for this fruity concoction. 

“I was hoping I’d find you out here.” Pacey turns to see Andie closing the door behind her to join him. He could already tell she was nervous to talk to him. It was strange that after a year of being broken up, he could still read her so well.

“Hiding from the party has always been my move.” Pacey smiles, looking down at the street below them. “Hey, Will seems like a great guy.”

“Thanks, Pacey.” Andie smiles back at him softly, leaning against the railing beside him. “He was terrified to meet you. He says I told him too many nice things about you.”

Pacey laughs, “You’ve always been good at over exaggerating my good qualities, McPhee.” 

“I don’t over exaggerate, you just don’t like hearing it,” Andie rolls her eyes light heartedly, “I just wanted to come and check on you. Everything with Joey and you seems…. Complicated.”

“Yeah,” Pacey sighs, “Whatever Jack told you is probably---”

“A lie?” Andie interrupts him, her eyebrows raised accusingly. Pacey’s mouth hangs open, searching for a way to fix this. “Jack said you broke up two weeks ago and Jen said it was right after the wedding. Then your _ex-girlfriend_ told me you were good at ‘pretending’ at the wedding, so, you know, I’m pretty confused.”

“They’re all drunk,” Pacey attempts to lie with a laugh, “But then again, I think I am too.”

Andie laughs quietly, shaking her head. “What's going on, Pace?

Pacey sighs, “I never dated Joey.”

Andie knew it was coming, but it still surprises her. “So, at the wedding…?”

“Jack came up with this stupid idea. And I went along with it because, I don’t know, I didn’t want you to worry about me anymore. And I didn’t want to look like I was just sitting around and waiting for you to come back like some loser.”

“First of all, you’re not a loser.” She points a finger in his face, further proof that she’s had a couple drinks. “Second of all, I don’t believe you.”

Pacey furrows his brow. “What do you mean? You can ask Jack--”

“Oh no, I believe that Jack would concoct a scheme like that. And I believe that you and Jen would go along with it to make me feel better. And honestly, Joey seems sweet enough to play along for your sake….” Andie’s eyes are on Pacey and he feels his face flush slightly. 

“Then what's so hard to believe, Andie?” Pacey smiles, turning to her with a charming grin. 

She narrows her eyes, pursing her lips. “That I fell for it. I know you, Pacey. Even after all this time, I like to think that I can read you like a book. And at that wedding, I thought you were already in love with her.”

Andie’s words hit him right in the chest, but he’s quick to laugh it off as he turns back to the view. “I think you’re losing your touch, McPhee. Me and Joey were barely even friends back then.”

“And what are you now?”

“Now, we’re friends,” Pacey shrugs. 

“Good. I like her. She told me that you have good taste.” Andie brags lightheartedly. 

This gets a laugh from Pacey. “Is that what you guys talked about in the kitchen?”

“Among other things.” Andie grins, elbowing him gently. Pacey puts his arm around her shoulder, giving her a quick side hug. “Her new boyfriend isn’t as cute as you.”

“Yeah, it’s definitely a rebound.” Pacey jokes with his first genuine smile all night. 

* * *

It gets late and Joey finally says goodbye to AJ by the door. “Thanks for coming,” she says, a little sleepy now that her alcohol was wearing off.

“Thanks for inviting me. This was fun,” he assures her as he slips his coat on. 

Joey smiles. “Yeah, I know pretty great people, don’t I?”

“Better than anyone I’ve met lately,” AJ replies. They look at each other for a moment before he lays a kiss on her cheek. “Have a good night, Joey.”

She blushes as she watches him walk out their door. “See you in Lit,” she calls out, and she’s not embarrassed because she hears him laugh as he waves.

Andie and Will are next to go, promising that the loft will see more of them once the new year arrives. 

“This was a really great night, guys,” Andie says as she hugs Jen goodbye. “I love you all.”

“We love you, too, sis,” Jack assures as he places a kiss on her forehead. 

As Andie hugs Pacey, she whispers into his ear, “Stay out of trouble, Pace. No more fake girlfriends for my sake, you hear me?”

Pacey chuckles. “No promises, McPhee.”

They’re finally out the door after Joey gives Andie a long tight hug and claims that she can’t wait to see her again.

After closing the door, Jack smiles. “Will’s pretty hot,” he says, probably only half-joking. 

“Eh, he’s alright,” Pacey answers with a shrug, assessing the mess in the kitchen from afar.

“Yeah, he’s no Pacey,” Joey agrees before she can stop herself. Pacey just stares at Joey with a bewildered look on his face, and he can see Jack grinning from the corner of his eye.

Jen can’t stop herself from smiling. “Alright, that’s your cue to go to bed, Jo.”

“What? I have so much party left in me,” Joey claims, even though she’s struggling to keep her eyes open. “Where’s Audrey?”

“Passed out on our couch about an hour ago,” Jack tells her with a smile. “She’s fine. Now it’s your turn.” He kisses her cheek and makes his way to the bathroom. “You guys can clean up tomorrow, right?”

“What?” Pacey whines with knitted brows. “Why do _we_ get clean up duty?”

“Jack and I gotta finish packing and catch our flight,” Jen reminds him.

“Don’t worry, Pace and I got it. Right, Witter? We’re a dream team,” Joey says as she pats him on the back. “If we can convince Andie that we’re in love, we can do anything.” 

“I am _this_ close to splashing cold water on your face, Potter,” Pacey teases and she pouts in response. With a sigh, he gives in. “Fine. We’ll do it.”

Jen chuckles before giving Joey a hug. “Love you guys.” Pacey kisses her forehead and she’s off to follow Jack into the bathroom to brush her teeth. “Goodnight.”

“Pace…” Joey’s hand reaches for his before he can walk away. “I don’t think I can make it to my bedroom on my own,” she whines.

“What about all that party left in you?” Pacey sighs dramatically in response, but she sees a little smile creeping in. “Good God, woman, we are never leaving you unsupervised around alcohol again.” He loops his arm around hers and leads her to her bed. 

Joey grins as she feels her familiar mattress. “Oh, bed, I have missed you,” she drunkenly says as she hits her head on her pillow. Pacey takes off her high heels for her and brings her blanket up to her elbows. “Thanks, Pace,” she whispers. “I bet you really were the best boyfriend.”

Pacey freezes for a moment, still leaning over her slightly. He smiles to himself. On a normal night, Pacey would have some snarky comeback to dispute this kind of claim, but not tonight. Not when Joey’s voice was so tender. He’s speechless for a moment, before he finally whispers back, “Wouldn’t you like to know.”

Joey grins sloppily. “I think I could handle you,” she teases.

“I’d like to see you try,” Pacey quips. “Just get some rest, okay, Potter?”

“Thanks, Pace,” she whispers, snuggling her blanket closer to her chin. “You’re a great guy.” She passes out quickly, a smile still on her face.

* * *

**Part 2**

Joey had said goodbye to Pacey before he left for his shift on Christmas Eve afternoon, and now she was enjoying some cliché Hallmark Channel Christmas movie when suddenly there’s a knock at the door. She wasn’t expecting company, but maybe it was Audrey needing immediate escape from family drama, or a late package arriving for someone at the loft.

She was _not_ expecting to see her older sister and her boyfriend with Alexander in their arms, surrounded by bags. 

“Surprise!” Bessie says excitedly, instantly greeting Joey with a hug, which she finally returns after her brain catches up. 

“Bessie, what…” Joey is struggling to comprehend anything. “What are you guys doing here?”

“What, you thought you could escape us for Christmas? You thought wrong, missy,” her sister teases as she grabs a bag.

“No, I’m glad you’re guys are here,” Joey quickly defends, greeting Bodie with a kiss on the cheek. “I just really wasn’t expecting this. At all.”

“We’re sorry if we’re intruding, Jo,” Bodie whispers. “Bessie was insistent on this.”

Joey shakes her head, clearing it of any panic. “No, you guys are fine. Come in.” She helps them with their bags and sets them down in the living room. “You guys are lucky we have two rooms available,” she jokes as she takes Alex into her arms, instantly cheered up by his presence. Surely Pacey would understand, right?

* * *

Pacey arrives a little late into the evening, carrying some Chinese take out he had bought as their Christmas Eve dinner. His shift had been painless, typical holiday crowds who tipped decently to make themselves feel less horrible about being alone. Sadly enough, Pacey felt like he fit in there, but he had to admit that having someone to go home to helped him through it. So he stopped at their favorite Chinese restaurant on his way home as a nice little surprise for Joey. He did feel bad that she wasn’t seeing her family for the holidays, so his goal was to not be so grumpy this year. 

With the cheeriest smile Pacey can muster, he opens the loft door and is surprised to hear a loud pitched scream followed by childish laughter, and he looks down to see a toddler rushing past. He’s followed instantly by Joey, who manages to take him in his arms with a little struggle.

“Hey,” Joey greets him with a panicked smile, a little breathless. “You weren’t answering your phone.”

His fake cheery smile morphs into complete shock as he stares at Joey and the small child in her arms, “Uh, I forgot my charger… Who is this?”

Bessie and Bodie walk into his view from the kitchen, smiling. “You must be Pacey.”

Pacey just turns to Joey, brow furrowed loosely. 

“Pace, this is my older sister Bessie and her boyfriend Bodie,” Joey says, avoiding his eyes. Bodie goes in for a handshake, but Bessie goes straight for the hug.

“I just wanted to thank you for taking Joey in,” Bessie says as she pulls away. “I’ve heard great things about you guys, and the apartment is really nice.”

“Is that take out?” Bodie asks with raised brows. “Sorry, son, not tonight. Tonight I am treating you both to some _real_ food.”

Pacey’s head is still spinning from the warm welcome he received. He looks down at the takeout bag in his arms, immediately nodding. “Right, you’re a cook. It’s nice to meet you both.” He laughs softly, glancing at Joey again. 

She simply bounces Alex in her arms. “Oh, and this is Alexander. Say hi!” she tells the child, bringing him closer to her roommate.

Pacey smiles, holding his hand up for a high five. “Hey Alex, I’m Pacey.”

Alexander smiles shyly, smacking Pacey’s hand with all his might. He giggles when Pacey groans and pretends that Alexander hurt his hand. He lays his head on Joey’s shoulder. Pacey continues, “Aunt Joey told me that you’re really cool, Little Man.”

Joey is pleasantly surprised at how good Pacey is with the kid, and she can’t help but smile. “Well, guys, maybe we should let Pacey settle in for a second,” she says, handing Alex off to Bessie. 

“Of course. I’ll go check on the food,” Bodie says with a smile and they all walk into the kitchen. 

Joey follows Pacey into his room and quietly closes the door behind them. “I’m so sorry,” she says quickly. “She didn’t tell me, they just kind of showed up at our door as a Christmas surprise. I hope this doesn’t ruin your stress-free holiday.” She throws him a sorry smile. 

Pacey shrugs, sitting on his bed with a sigh. “Jo, it’s fine. They seem nice and it’s sweet that they came all this way for you.”

Joey chuckles. “I’m sure there’s another reason I haven’t got out of them yet. But, hey, at least we get free food tonight.”

“And takeout for when Bodie’s gone,” Pacey laughs softly, wringing his hands in his lap gently. “I just hope it’s okay that _I’m_ here, I feel like I’m intruding or something.”

“Of course not,” Joey says quickly. “Before they got here you were the closest thing to family that I had for tonight, so…” She shrugs, a little embarrassed. 

Pacey smiles to himself, looking down at his lap to try to hide it. He resorts to joking, “I can't believe I’ve been demoted. My takeout doesn’t stand a chance against Bodie’s real cooking.” 

“It really doesn’t,” Joey agrees with a laugh. “Thanks for being okay with this.”

Pacey stands up. “Jo, really, it’s nothing. I’m actually pretty good with other people’s families, so we’ll be fine. Maybe this is karma for me giving you such a hard time at first --- now three more Potter’s have showed up on my doorstep,” he teases.

“However shall you survive?” Joey plays along.

“Right, well…” Pacey nods, laughing gently before scratching his head, “I should probably change so I don’t smell like booze and cigarettes around Alexander. But I’ll be out in a little bit.”

“Great, yeah,” she agrees, opening the door. “I’ll see you out there, Witter.”

“See ya, Potter.” He waves a little. He couldn’t quite explain what he was feeling because he really _didn’t_ mind the Potter’s being here. But something about their night getting derailed was bumming him out. 

* * *

A couple hours after their delicious Bodie-cooked dinner, Joey finds Pacey in his room, fumbling with some wrapping paper by his desk. She knocks lightly on the door to let him know of her presence. “Hey,” she says softly. “I have an exciting opportunity for you.”

Pacey turns around quickly, hiding the small gift on his desk as nonchalantly as possible. He rambles slightly, “Should I be worried? Because you kind of sound like you’re tricking me into something.”

She rolls her eyes before speaking. “Well, Alex can never sleep without someone reading a story to him first. Usually I can take him solo, but he’s been begging for ‘Uncle Pacey’ tonight,” Joey tells him with a smile. “You up for the job?”

Pacey’s heart warms. “Uncle Pacey?” He double checks that the gift on his desk is hidden well enough and then joins Joey in the doorway with a smile. “As long as none of the books have big words, I should be fine.”

She leads him into Jen’s room where they had dragged Jack’s mattress to the floor so little Alex had a bed by his parents. “Alright, buddy, I got Pacey for you. You happy now?” Joey asks the kid with a smile, and Alex beams proudly, already adjusting his seating position to be closer to Pacey. Joey picks up the book Alex chose earlier and flips to the first page, adjusting herself so that Pacey can read it, too. “Goodnight, Moon,” she reads softly. 

Pacey smiles down at Alex, who’s practically dancing in his seat with excitement. They read the book slowly and in hushed tones, Joey holding the book and turning the pages. At some point during the short story, Alexander reaches over and takes Pacey’s hand. As Joey reads the last page, Pacey catches her eye and just smiles. _“Goodnight noises everywhere.”_

Joey closes the book gently and kisses Alex on the forehead. “Okay, now get some sleep, little guy.” She goes over to hug Bessie on the bed and then waits for Pacey to join her before they leave the room.

“That was a horrible book,” Pacey says as soon as they close the door. 

Joey slaps him lightly on the arm. “It’s for kids!”

“The last line is so creepy! _Noises everywhere_!” Pacey laughs quietly, teasing, “Let’s hope he doesn’t have a nightmare after that.”

She rolls her eyes with a chuckle as Bodie appears from the bathroom. “Did you guys get him down?” he asks.

“Sleeping like a baby,” Joey assures him, grinning. She looks over at Pacey and bumps his shoulder gently. “Thanks to this one over here.”

“I really excel when it comes to reading one syllable words,” Pacey brags half heartedly, bumping Joey back. 

“You guys are a good team, I see,” Bodie says with a smile. “Thank you both.”

“Of course. Goodnight, Bo,” Joey says as she kisses him on the cheek and walks off to the kitchen for a late night snack. 

“You’ve been so welcoming, Pacey. We can’t thank you enough,” Bodie says once Joey’s out of ear shot. “We hope we made your Christmas a fun one.”

“You guys have been welcoming to _me._ I’m glad you let me crash Potter Christmas.” Pacey pats Bodie’s arm lightly. “You’re welcome here any time, man. Especially after my disastrous work in the kitchen tonight.”

“I wish you’d stop putting yourself down, Pacey,” Bodie says softly. “I really appreciated your help, and you were much better than a lot of the guys I work with at my restaurant. You could go far if you really wanted to. I believe that.”

Pacey instinctively looks down at the floor as Bodie compliments him before forcing himself to hold eye contact. “Thanks, that means a lot. I’ve never really attempted to cook before tonight, to be honest.” He pauses, glancing in the direction of the kitchen where he can hear Joey rummaging around. “I can’t believe Joey can stand living so far away from you guys.”

Bodie smiles with an easy shrug. “Seems like she found another family right here.”

“Yeah, that seems to be the running theme of this loft,” Pacey smiles, “I’ll let you get to bed, I’m sure Alex will have you up early tomorrow for presents.”

“Goodnight, Pacey.” Bodie pats Pacey’s shoulder firmly before heading into Jen’s room. Pacey makes his way into the kitchen to see what his roommate is up to, not realizing that he’s already smiling. To his delight, Joey was reheating her untouched Chinese food from earlier. “Good God, woman! How can you be thinking about more food after Bodie’s stir fry?”

“I’m a tiny girl, but I need a lot of sustenance,” Joey answers easily, pointing her fork accusingly. “You want some, too, now, don’t you?”

“Well, of course, I do. I’m only human.” Pacey walks behind her to go into the fridge. “Chinese takeout on Christmas Eve is the closest thing to a tradition I’ll ever bother with.”

Joey shakes her head with a smile. “Oh, come on. You can’t tell me you’re _still_ being a Grinch. Don’t deny that the Potter Holiday cheer got to you.” She carefully takes the food out of the microwave once it beeps. 

Pacey rolls his eyes as he closes the fridge and settles next to Joey at the island. “If there’s one thing I don’t do, it’s holiday cheer. All the holidays do is make happy people happier and unhappy people more miserable. I’m just playing along this year so I don’t ruin your fun.”

“How kind of you,” she teases, taking a seat on one of their stools and digging in. “So, since when are you so great with kids? I never would have pegged you as the type, but I guess it makes sense. You know, since you give off that childish energy.”

Narrowing his eyes, Pacey mimics Joey childishly, as if to prove her point, then he sits next to her and digs into his dumplings. “My sister, Kerry, has a few kids I used to babysit. And I did this volunteer program in high school where I mentored an 8 year old for a while,” Pacey explains nonchalantly, mouth full the entire time. 

“That poor child, having _you_ as his mentor.”

“I know, hopefully some years of intense therapy has undone all of my wrongdoing,” Pacey plays along. “Make sure Bess and Bodie get Alex to a child psychologist immediately.”

Joey laughs, stuffing some chicken into her mouth. “Not every child is screwed up like us, Pace.” She knocks on the wooden stool to keep it safe.

“I don’t think I’d consider _you_ screwed up, Joey. Extremely dorky and consistently misreading rooms, yes. But not screwed up.” 

“Oh, Pacey,” Joey says, putting her fork down. “You don’t know the half of it.”

Pacey puts his fork down too, turning to her partially, “Then tell me about it.”

Joey narrows her eyes, trying to figure out if he was joking or not. But, in the spirit of Christmas, she chooses to be honest. “Well, my mom died when I was little, and my dad’s in jail for drug dealing. So I think I can claim that ‘screwed up’ title pretty easily.”

“Oh,” Pacey nods quietly, not fully surprised by either explanation for her parents not being around. He knew saying sorry wouldn’t hold much weight, so he didn’t bother. “I _guess_ you can claim it, and you get credit for seeming so put together all the time.” He picks his fork back up and quickly steals a piece of her chicken. 

Joey gasps dramatically. “Don’t touch my food!” She threatens through a laugh. “For that you owe me _your_ screwed up story.”

“Nope,” Pacey feigns sincerity, chewing on the stolen chicken casually. “Sorry, Jo, but sharing back to back is against my code. I wouldn’t want you to feel like it’s some kind of competition.”

“That’s a load of crap,” Joey calls him out with a roll of her eyes. “Come on, we can fake date but we can’t share family drama?”

Pacey widens his eyes teasingly, reaching for another piece of chicken. Joey slaps him on the wrist quickly and he settles for poking around his dumplings instead. “My family’s complicated, that’s all. Nothing too juicy. My dad’s an asshole and my mom hates me.” He shrugs.

Joey nods understandingly, but she can’t stop herself from prying. “Youngest kid syndrome,” she observes. “I mean, that’s what Gretchen told me. Right?”

“Unwanted fourth kid syndrome is more like it, but they’re essentially the same thing.” Pacey smiles at the idea of Joey and Gretchen talking about him. “As you know, I’m not great at keeping my mouth shut and my parents just aren’t as forgiving as you are. Which is fine. Gretchen did what she could and once I met Jen it was nice to have somewhere to run away to every so often.” He feels himself rambling and clears his throat, standing up to go grab a drink. 

Joey waits for him quietly, her brain processing all this new information about her roommate. She knew he had baggage --- Jen and Jack mentioned his family every so often, and he _was_ avoiding going home to be with them --- but she never thought she’d crack him about it so easily. It suddenly explains so much about why he is the way he is, like puzzle pieces finally fitting. Once he sits back down again, she turns to him and says honestly, “Well, they’re missing out.”

Pacey just nods, wiping his palms on his jeans anxiously. He’s heard that before a hundred times, but hearing it from Joey eases the awkwardness he feels for unloading like that. “Thanks. As you can see, my family drama is very much unresolved hence the rambling. So I really appreciate you letting me mooch off of your Christmas, _Josephine_.”

She smiles at his use of her full name. “Of course, Pacey,” she replies genuinely, keeping eye contact so that he’s distracted enough to not notice her taking one of his dumplings. “And _I’m_ grateful that I can mooch off your food. Karma.” She smiles triumphantly before taking a bite. 

At first, Pacey is smiling genuinely, his eyes wandering down to her lips for a quick moment. That moment of weakness is what causes him to miss her stealing his dumpling, but as she takes a bite he breaks out in a laugh, “Hey!” He reaches across her and tries to pick up her entire container of rice. “Well, if we’re sharing…”

She holds it far enough from his reach. “Get your _own_ rice, Pacey!” She makes sure to keep her voice subdued as to not wake their guests. “I thought this was your Christmas gift to me!” 

“It was originally,” Pacey admits, still reaching for the rice. “But I found a better one, so now all bets are off.” He steals a piece of her chicken instead, taking a triumphant bite. 

“You actually got me a present?” Joey asks, dramatically surprised. “Well, it’s ---” She checks the clock on the microwave. “Two hours to Christmas, and now you have me all excited,” Joey teases, swerving his hands and grabbing some of his noodles. 

“I wasn’t going to because you really don’t deserve one, but then I felt bad you were stuck here for Christmas and...” Pacey pretends to come to some big conclusion, “Well, since your family came to you, maybe you don’t really _need_ a present from me.” He tries to guard his food from her and ends up failing. Finally he scoots his food down the counter and moves to the next stool over. 

Joey accepts this move but still huddles over her food protectively. “That’s not fair, I have a gift for _you_!”

“So you got me an actual present when you thought all I was getting you was takeout?” Pacey asks, still eyeing her chicken from across the counter. 

“Yes, because unlike _some_ , I am a good roommate,” Joey teases.

“Are _you_ calling _me_ a bad roommate?!” Pacey asks, taking mock offense. 

“And if I am?”

“Then I might have to tell Alexander that his Auntie Jo is on the naughty list, because telling her severely underachieving and alone friend that he’s a bad roommate on _Christmas_ is just plain cruel.” Pacey places a hand on his chest dramatically. 

She gives an over the top gasp to his threat. “You wouldn’t dare.”

Pacey shrugs, turning to eat some of his noodles, “Maybe I would, we’ll just have to wait and see.”

“I got my eye on you, Witter.” She narrows her eyes at him, as menacing as she can.

“Ooooh, I’m so scared,” He taunts her, shaking his head.

* * *

The next morning, Alex jumps onto Joey’s bed to wake her up. “Auntie Joey, it’s time for presents!”

Joey groans, but she still gets out of bed begrudgingly and follows Alex into the living room where Bodie and Bessie are waiting for them. 

“Where’s Uncle Pacey?” Alex asks innocently.

“You know what, buddy, Uncle Pace likes his sleep,” Joey explains before she sees the opportunity before her. “I’ll go get him, okay?” 

She opens Pacey’s door as quietly as possible, sneaking as close to his bed as she can. She picks up one of his extra pillows and then slams it onto his chest. “Rise and shine, roomie!” 

Pacey flinches sleepily, groaning at the realization of what was going on. He grabs the pillow from her and covers his face with it. “I hate you!” he yells through the pillow before throwing it at her. “Two more hours, tops.”

Joey catches the pillow effortlessly and sets it back down on his bed before grabbing his hand and forcing him to sit upright. “Sorry, but it’s Christmas morning and we have a child in the loft. Well, another one.”

“I think telling a child no every so often does wonders for his self esteem, y’know. Maybe Uncle Pacey can just get a quick rundown of what he missed later. I have work at noon and I’m exhausted,” Pacey whines, his eyes barely open and his hair a wild mess. 

She forces him to stand and lets him lean on her dramatically. “Nope. You hyped up my gift so much, you _have_ to give it to me now,” she says as they take small steps towards the door. “You got a whole hour and a half to enjoy our lovely Potter company. You wouldn’t wanna miss it.”

Not fully aware of anything yet, Pacey leans his head on Joey’s sleepily. “Gotta grab my gifts. And put pants on,” he mumbles. 

She looks down, finally noticing his boxers, and steps away panicked. “Oh, right,” she says, a little embarrassed but glad that he’s too sleepy to notice. “Go... do that. I’ll wait out there. With everyone else.”

“Here,” Pacey stumbles over to his desk and grabs two poorly wrapped presents. “Bring these out for me.” He’s still not aware enough to think about the fact that he’s barely dressed as he holds the gifts out to Joey. 

She keeps her eyes upward and reaches blindly until her hands find the presents. “Yep, got them,” Joey assures him before closing the door behind her. 

She makes herself some toast while they wait for Pacey, and once he finally joins them on the couch by the Christmas tree, all the gift giving happens in a blur. Joey is actually really glad that she got the chance to give the presents to her family in person and see their reactions, especially Alexander’s excited giggles as he opens his to find a brand new toy he had been wanting. 

“What do you say, Alex?” Bodie asks gently.

“Thank you, Auntie Joey,” the kid says as he runs over to give her a big hug. 

Joey’s cheeks hurt from smiling so big. “Anytime. I love you,” she reminds him with a boop on his nose. 

Pacey sips his coffee and watches the Potter’s exchange gifts sweetly, and he couldn’t help but think about how this is the most normal Christmas he’s ever had. When the opportunity arises, Pacey picks up one of his poorly wrapped presents and holds it out to Alexander. He laughs at how quickly the small child tears it open. To Pacey’s disbelief, he’s actually excited when he sees that it’s a book. 

“This was one of my favorites when I was little. Maybe next time you visit, me and Aunt Joey can read it to you?” Pacey explains before Alexander runs over to give him a hug. 

“When did you manage to get that?” Joey asks, completely in awe at the gesture.

Pacey shrugs as Alexander runs to show his parents the book. “I stopped by that bookstore by the bar this morning, they kept advertising about being open all weekend.”

“That was really sweet,” she replies, still shaking her head in disbelief. “I think that earns _you_ a gift.” Joey goes over to their shitty loft Christmas tree and picks up one of the gifts, handing it to Pacey with a smile before sitting beside him to excitedly wait for his reaction.

Pacey holds the wrapped present in his lap for a moment, glancing at Joey as she sits beside him. “Does this mean you think I’m a good roommate?” He whispers before opening the paper carefully. 

She rolls her eyes at his comment. “Don’t make me take it back, Pace.”

Before all of the paper is off of the frame, Pacey freezes, smiling instantly. He uncovers the entire picture and shakes his head. In a nice frame, there's a pencil drawing of the two of them. It looked familiar, and Pacey quickly recognizes it from the wedding a few months back. Jen had sneakily taken a photo of them while they laughed about some dumb joke only they understood. She'd teased Pacey about the photo for a week after the wedding. Pacey traces his finger over the drawing gently before looking up at Joey, “Did you draw this?!”

She nods, super proud of herself for the reaction she got. “Do you like it? I’m not an artist, but...” She shrugs.

“I love it.” Pacey insists, peeling away the rest of the paper. “I had no idea you were so talented, holy--” He glances up toward Alexander only to realize that Bessie and Bodie are watching him and Joey. Pacey shyly turns the frame around to show off the drawing, “Wow, Jo…”

“That’s beautiful, Jo.” Bodie compliments, giving Joey a knowing look as Bessie quietly smiles at her little sister. 

Pacey turns the frame back around and admires the detail quietly. His eyes are squeezed shut and her nose is all crinkly. He can’t get over how perfect it is. He looks up at Joey, a wave of dread washing over him, “This is… _too good.”_

“You flatter me,” she jokes. “Now you…?” Joey pries with an innocent smile and her puppy dog eyes.

He’s shaking his head before he even processes her pleading look. “No --” Pacey stands up and grabs his poorly wrapped gift for Joey. “I can’t give you this present now, it’s really stupid.”

“What? That’s not fair!” Joey whines. “I promise I’ll love it!”

Pacey heads for his room, fully blushing already, with Joey’s drawing in one hand and his gift for her in the other. “No, you won’t. I promise, it’s bad. I’m a bad roommate.” He’s laughing now, awestruck at how stupid his present seems now. 

“This is pure evil, Pace. And on St. Nick’s birthday?” Joey gives a disappointed shake of her head. She turns to Alexander. “I think Uncle Pacey should go on the naughty list for this, don’t you?” The child probably has no idea what’s really going on, but he nods his head anyway, and it gets a laugh out of Bessie.

Pacey hears Joey going on in the other room, after placing her drawing on his bed carefully. He covers his mouth for a moment before hiding her gift on the top shelf of his closet. When he re-enters the main room, he’s still blushing. “I have to get ready for work, we can handle this later.” He waves awkwardly and goes right back into his room, locking the door behind him. 

In the living room, Bodie whispers, “I think you broke him.”

Joey rolls her eyes. “You don’t mess with my presents, Bodie. Let this be a lesson to you all.”

* * *

Bessie zips her suitcase up, finally finished with her packing. Joey is sitting on the bed after having helped her fold up her clothes, and the two sisters share a smile.

“Thanks for having us over, Jo,” Bessie says, taking a seat beside her. “We really didn’t want to lose our tradition over a messy breakup with that stupid cheater.”

Joey laughs. “Right. Well, thank you for the surprise. I really loved seeing you guys. And I know that Pacey did, too.”

At his name, Bessie smiles. “Yeah, he’s a good guy, hey?” 

“He’s alright,” Joey jokes with a shrug.

“You two seem to have gotten close,” her older sister teases, nudging her slightly. 

Joey puts a strand of hair behind her ear. “Sure. I guess that’s what happens when you live together,” she replies, trying not to look too into the look her sister was giving her. “Apparently we’re not close enough for him to give me my present, though.” She was still mad about that.

“You know, I was a little scared to come over here and see how you were doing, but I guess I really didn’t have much to worry about.”

“I know you worry. But I think I found myself some great people here.”

Bessie nods. “I think so, too. And, look, you’re doing so much better than Dawson. He was parading that blonde girl all over town like he had something to prove.”

Joey feels like she was punched in the chest. “Wait, what?” she asks slowly, and Bessie instantly knows she’s screwed up. “You mean he took her to Capeside?”

“Oh, Joey, I’m so sorry,” her sister apologizes instantly. “I thought you knew and that’s why you didn’t want to come home.”

“Well, yeah, but I was scared of running into _Dawson_ ,” Joey explains, her heartbeat racing faster by the minute. “I didn’t know he was actually dating the girl he _cheated_ on me with!”

Bessie doesn’t really know what to say, so she simply repeats herself. “I’m so sorry. I really thought you and Pacey…” She trails off, alarmed by the surprised look on her little sister’s face that told her she would say something else she’d regret. “Never mind. Listen, sweetie, you deserve better than Dawson Leery, okay? I promise you’re better off and he doesn’t deserve a second of your thoughts. I bet he’s miserable. He doesn’t know what he’s lost.”

Joey nods, but she still feels a piercing pain in her chest. “Thanks, Bess.”

They sit there in silence for a second, with Bessie’s hand over Joey’s supportively, before the oldest Potter gets up from her seat. “I hate to leave you like this, but we can’t miss our flight.”

“Right. Of course.” Joey shakes her head of any hurt and puts on a brave face to see her family off. She helps them get their bags to the elevator, and hugs everyone goodbye. She kisses Alex on the forehead, and waves them off with the biggest smile she can muster, promising she’ll visit for Christmas next year as usual. 

Then she goes back into the apartment and goes straight for her heartbreak jar of peanut butter.

* * *

When Pacey gets back to the loft after his shift, the tone is completely different than how he left it. All the lights are off, even the Christmas Tree. He walks up to the couch to put his jacket down. “Joey?”

After some further wandering, Pacey hears muffled music coming from Joey’s room. He sighs, knocking on the door and shouting over the stereo, “Joey?” Finally, he opens the door, his face falling when he sees her, “Hey Jo….”

Joey’s under her covers, surrounded by used tissues. It takes her a second to snap out of her own head, and she goes to turn the music down at the sight of her roommate. “Hi,” she croaks out. “How was your shift?”

“It was slow… And depressing,” He says, hesitantly walking closer to her bed. “So, what happened here? Did you and Bess get in a fight or do you miss them or something?” 

Joey sits herself up slightly, a little embarrassed that he’s seeing her like this. “No, everything’s fine. I’m fine,” she assures him, not very convincingly. 

Pacey furrows his brow, “Uh, you’re listening to sad music and crying in bed on Christmas. Not to mention the jar of peanut butter. Oh god, is this about this morning? Because of my stupid gift?”

“Yep,” Joey replies jokingly, laughing half-heartedly. “Look what you did, Pace.”

“It’s your own fault, your gift was just too perfect,” He jokes lightly, sitting on the end of her bed. He sighs, “I really am sorry.”

Joey finally meets his eye and throws him a sad smile. “I was teasing, Pacey. You’re fine,” she assures before exhaling deeply. “Bessie told me that she saw Dawson at Cape Side with the girl he cheated on me with. So I guess they’re together now.” She shrugs lazily. “I guess I’ve been processing.”

Pacey sighs, nodding to himself. “So we’ve confirmed what we already know, I guess. That he’s an asshole. And that you deserve better.” He pats her leg gently, “And you’re prettier than her?” He attempts. 

“Oh God,” Joey says with an honest chuckle. “You suck at this. But thank you for trying.”

“Well in my opinion, you’ve laid terrible groundwork. Sad music is not the way to go, especially sad _Taylor Swift._ Everyone knows _Mad_ Taylor Swift is the way to get over a shitty ex. Sad Taylor is when you’re still in love.” Pacey rambles on purpose, before sighing to himself. “You’re not allowed to be sad on Christmas.”

Joey crosses her arms over her chest protectively. “I can do what I want,” she pouts.

“Not today you can’t.” He stands up and leaves the room, returning a moment later with the small square present that he’d hidden from her this morning. Pacey sits on her bed and holds the gift out to her. “But you have to promise not to laugh at me. It was an impulse buy, really. I shouldn’t have bothered.”

She grabs for the gift with a gasp, suddenly forgetting about any sad thought she let eat her up for the last few hours. Joey looks up at Pacey with an excited smile before carefully unwrapping it. She discovers a little box, and inside it was a cute Christmas themed mug with a dog in a Santa hat on it, the words _Santa Paws_ written in bright red letters. “No way,” Joey laughs. “It’s Santa Paws!” She can’t stop herself from grinning. “In what world would I _not_ love this? Thank you, Pacey.”

“Really?” Pacey asks, completely shocked. He’s still wringing his hands nervously. 

“Are you kidding?” Joey throws her covers back, revealing to him her patterned pyjamas --- they were filled with dogs in little Santa hats. “It’s perfect,” she assures him with a grin.

“Oh my god,” Pacey laughs, “Well, it’s still not as good as yours but I’ll give myself some credit, I guess. I saw it and thought it was super dorky so…. It made me think of you.” He shrugs. 

“Thank you…?”

“I mean, look at your pyjama pants, Potter. Clearly I had the right idea.” He smiles, “You already said it was perfect, so you can’t take it back now. But I still owe you.”

The girl shakes her head, still admiring her gift. “You’re off the hook, Pace. This makes up for it.” She sets the mug down by her bedside table, proudly displaying it.

Pacey watches her set the mug down and sighs happily. He stands up. “Nope.” He holds his hand out to her, “Come on, I have an idea.”

She narrows her eyes at him, wondering if it was really worth it to leave the comfort of her bed. But Pacey actually looks excited about something, and she can’t resist finding out what he’s talking about. She takes his hand with a smile and climbs out of her sheets. “Should I change?”

Pacey considers his answer, as he helps her up, “No, just get some shoes and a jacket. It’s dark out anyway, nobody will notice how dorky your pants are.”

Joey rolls her eyes. “Shut up, you love them.”

“Did I say dorky? I meant lovely!” He smiles, “I gotta get myself a pair like those.”

“Noted,” she teases as she follows him out the door.

* * *

“So, are you gonna tell me where we’re going?” Joey asks from the passenger seat of Pacey’s car.

“Nope,” Pacey insists, “We’re almost there, stop asking every ten seconds, Potter.”

She crosses her arms over her chest with a dramatic sigh. “Fine. But this better be good.”

Pacey rolls his eyes but still worries that she’ll be disappointed. At this point he was just happy to have gotten her out of the loft, but hopefully his little surprise would be worth the trip. A few minutes later, Pacey pulls onto Candy Cane Lane and parks the car. 

Ahead of them, the street is lined with brightly decorated houses and extravagant lawn decor. Joey gasps as she looks out the car window, eyes twinkling. “What? Why are we here?”

Pacey turns the car off, biting the inside of his cheek. “It’s Candy Cane Lane! Christmas people love this stuff, so I figured...” He shrugs, finally admitting, “Alright, I heard you talking about it at the Christmas party.”

Joey softens despite herself. “Oh.” To be honest, Joey remembered very little of that party thanks to her alcohol consumption, but it was a really nice gesture. Especially tonight. “Wow, Pace, this is really sweet.” She turns to him accusingly. “Who _are_ you and what did you do to my grumpy anti-holidays roommate?”

“I may hate the holidays, but you don’t. So… I dunno, I didn’t want your night to be ruined. Especially after the gift you gave me,” Pacey explains quietly. “That drawing is probably the nicest gift anyone’s ever given me.”

“I’m glad you liked it. I had no idea what to get you,” Joey admits, taking off her seatbelt.

Pacey shakes his head, laughing as he gets out of the car. “So when _you_ don’t know what to get someone you draw them a beautiful picture, and when _I_ don’t know what to get someone, I give them a mug. Incredible.”

She laughs, giddy over her surroundings, which are shining brightly and full of cheer. “Hey, they both worked.” She walks up to him and intertwines their arms. “I’m cold,” Joey explains easily.

Pacey smiles, happy to see her happy, and walks with her. “Just don’t go expecting much from me, this year was an exception to my terrible gift giving. Y’know, out of pity,” he teases.

“Got it. Well, don’t expect much for your birthday, then. It’s way too close to Christmas, and back to back sharing is against your code, if I remember correctly.” She smirks at the memory.

Pacey laughs. It’s strange how an excuse he heard from his family his entire life was funny for the first time just because it was Joey making it. “That’s a bit of a stretch, but I’ll allow it because acknowledging the code at all is impressive. _But_ , in all seriousness, don’t bother getting me a birthday present. I’m not much of a birthday person either.”

“Too late,” Joey whispers with a grin, dragging him to a house with a huge snow globe on their front lawn.

Pacey starts to argue but is too distracted by the big lit up snow globe in front of them, “Wow.” He pauses. “I’m trying to come up with a comment that isn’t snarky and I just can’t do it. So I think I’m going to just quietly admire.”

“I wish you’d be quiet more often,” Joey teases. “Is all I need a big snow globe decoration? Because I’ll keep that in mind.”

“I guess I know what to expect as my birthday present now,” He smiles at her before turning back to the giant snow globe. “I can’t wait to see the look on Jack’s face when one of these shows up in the living room.”

“It has a snowman inside it! It’s so cute, it’s right up his alley.”

“If you’re the one who brings it in, he’d warm up to it. He already likes you more than he likes me.” Pacey tilts his head toward her, “I’m guessing you don’t remember him declaring his love for you at the Christmas party.”

Joey chuckles. “What, our _homosexual_ roommate is in love with me? How lucky am I?” She couldn’t tell if he was kidding or not. She’d have to ask Jack once he came back. Joey drags Pacey to the next house over, where the lights match the Christmas music the owners are playing on an outside speaker. “Not gonna lie, I don’t remember a lot of that party. Well, except you taking my shoes off and getting me to bed. I also may have talked to Andie, but it’s a bit of a blur.”

_Of all the things to remember._ “Yeah, you asked Andie if she thought you were a slut. And blew our cover about the wedding, which by the way I forgive you for.”

“What?!” Joey’s mouth hangs open and her hand instantly covers her face in shame. “Oh my god.” She buries her head in his arm to try to hide her embarrassment. “Please don’t let me drink that much ever again. Do you think I’ve ruined my chances of being friends with Andie?”

“You’re fine, I kind of wanted to come clean anyway,” Pacey assures her as they move on to the next house. This one has colored lights covering every inch of their roof. “And trust me, she loves you. She couldn’t stop gushing about how happy she is that you moved in with us.” 

“Wait, really?” Joey is happily surprised. “Thank God.”

“Now that she knows you aren’t my ex, she won’t hold back. She probably just felt awkward before.” Pacey shrugs, “Why do you care so much anyway?”

“I know this may come as a surprise to you, but I prefer it when people like me,” Joey says, only half-joking. “Plus, she’s Jack’s sister and your ex, so she’s clearly an important person. I wouldn’t wanna complicate anything.” Joey looks both ways before getting them to cross the road to the other side, and make their way back down the street. “I doubt she really believed we were dating, though. Come on, she’s a smart girl. And there’s no way we were good actors. She was probably playing along for our sakes.”

Pacey is quiet, pretending to take in the sight of the house in front of them. There was no way he was going to tell her how shocked Andie was to find out they never dated. He just nods, “Yeah, probably. But either way, she loves you so you officially fit in with everyone in our little circle. Congratulations, Potter.” He turns to her with a soft smile. 

Joey grins back at him, her tongue sticking out slightly through her teeth. She moves her hand down from his bicep and intertwines their fingers. “Merry Christmas, Pacey.”

Pacey squeezes her hand, “Merry Christmas, Joey.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Holidays to everyone, thank you so much for reading!


	5. New Year's

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for a New Year's party in the loft. What better time for a bunch of drama to come to life?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy 2021 everyone!! we hope this year is better than the last. thank you so much for the support on this fic, we enjoy writing it so so much.<3

Pacey is sitting on the end of his bed, eating a turkey sandwich as neatly as possible. Jen has been pacing around his room for a couple minutes for reasons he’s still not sure of, but she finally breaks her silence. “So I saw Joey’s drawing. It’s so beautiful! That was so thoughtful of her, how did you react? I know how much you hate getting gifts.”

“I wasn’t too bad. I’d call it a level one Pacey freak out.” He shrugs, mouth full as he watches his friend curiously. “Is _that_ why you walked in here?”

“No, I just want to catch up! I feel like we’ve barely talked since I got home from New York.” Jen’s voice cracks on the words _New York_. “I'm just waiting for Jack.”

“For what?” Blissfully unaware of the bomb that his best friend is attempting to drop on him, Pacey continued focusing on his sandwich. He has been missing the warning signs in the days since she returned from their hometown. He hadn’t noticed how little Jen had talked about her time in New York, or the way Jack giggled every time the topic came up.

“I don’t know, just, y’know,” Jen laughs awkwardly. “I miss him.”

Pacey raises his eyebrows, finally a little suspicious. “We saw him twenty minutes ago. Are you sure you’re okay? You’re acting weird right now.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jen says with a shake of her head. “Tell me more about your weekend with the Potters!” Jen asks instead as she sits at Pacey’s desk, sitting on her hands in an attempt to still them.

“I worked, her sister and brother-in-law are nice, we ate stir fry, and we went and saw some lights together.”

Jack finally enters, practically jumping on the bed and causing Pacey to drop the last bite of his sandwich. As Pacey curses under his breath, Jack grins at Jen. “I hear the holidays brought a lot of people _together_ this year.”

Jen shoots him a dirty look, but Pacey doesn’t notice because he’s busy staring at the fallen sandwich and considering if he could justify eating it anyway. “I was just trying to enjoy my sandwich in peace, _why_ are you two in here?” Pacey groans.

“Who lays in bed to enjoy a turkey sandwich?” Jack asks.

“Someone with three roommates who lack personal space.”

Jen stands up again. “Well, I wanted to tell you something, and I guess it’s okay that Jack’s here. He already knows anyway.”

Pacey looks from Jack to Jen quietly.

“It’s not as life-altering as it sounds and I just want you to remember how much you love me and how long we’ve been friends. We’re practically family!”

Jack lets out a quiet giggle, earning a smack on the arm from Jen.

“Please just spit it out, Lindley,” Pacey pleads.

“Well ---” Jen starts, but is quickly interrupted by Joey entering the room. Pacey sits up a little.

Joey takes a seat on the edge of the bed beside Jack, eyes narrowing at her roommates. “Why are you all in here? Was this another loft meeting I was _conveniently_ not told about?” She narrows her eyes at Pacey before taking a sip of the coffee in her hands.

Jen sighs. “Wow, I really wasn’t expecting everyone to be here for this,” she says under her breath with an awkward chuckle.

“Jen’s being all weird and trying to tell me something.” Pacey explains to Joey, looking at Jen with raised eyebrows.

Joey nods and quickly turns to her friend patiently. Jen can feel her hands clamming up, especially with Jack still grinning at her. “Um…”

“Jen, just tell him.” Jack whispers.

Jen nods, hesitating some more before she rushes the words out. The wrong words. “I’m throwing a New Year’s party in the loft!” She throws Jack an innocent smile while he rolls his eyes.

Pacey groans. “But we _just_ hosted.”

“What?” Joey pouts. “I wish you told me before! I already agreed to go out with AJ.”

Jack oohs, poking Joey on the arm teasingly. “Joey’s got herself a boyfriend, everyone.”

“Shut up,” she says as she slaps his hand, careful not to spill her drink. “We’re not dating. We’re just hanging out.”

“Whatever you say,” Jack quips with a smile. “You’re still gonna kiss him at midnight.”

Instead of answering, Joey puts her mug down on Pacey’s desk and picks up a pillow to hit Jack with. He takes hold of it with ease, laughing childishly.

“Now I see why you didn’t want them here for this.” Pacey leans forward and yanks the pillow out of Jack’s hands, his eyes still on Jen. “You know how much I hate having people over. We’ve barely finished cleaning up from last week!”

“Me and Jack can be on cleanup this time! And you can bring whoever you want!” Jen smiles nervously.

“It’s two days away, everyone has plans.” Pacey groans, getting up from his bed and feeling something _squish_ under his foot.

“What was that?” Joey asks hesitantly, watching his expression fall.

Pacey lifts his foot, revealing that last bite of his sandwich, “My lunch.”

* * *

Audrey keeps taking every opportunity that presents itself to come over. Joey would question her eagerness, especially since her best friend has always been someone with constant plans and parties to attend, but she’s too busy stressing out now that Jack got in her head.

“AJ and I haven’t even gone on a proper date,” Joey explains, pacing her bedroom. “Unless you count those two times we went out for coffee. But we _really_ only went to the Christmas party together. That’s not dating!” She stops in her tracks, eyes darting over to Audrey, who’s laying on her bed. “Right?”

The blonde chuckles. “You’re way too stressed about this.”

Joey groans, throwing her arms up in frustration. “I don’t know how to do this! I haven’t dated in years, Audrey. And even still, Dawson was my first — and only — real boyfriend. Anyone else never really came close.”

Audrey lifts herself up by her elbows to properly look at her overly panicked friend. “Look, if you’re _that_ desperate for labels, just talk to the guy tomorrow night.”

“Maybe I rushed into all this way too fast.” Joey sighs as she takes a seat on the edge of her bed. “I wasn’t ready. I need more time.”

“God, Jo,” Audrey exclaims with a roll of her eyes. “Dawson _cheated_ on you! In my lovingly blunt opinion, you should’ve slept in like five different beds already.”

Joey hits her friend on the arm. “I am not that girl and you know it!”

“I sure do. But I still think you _should_ be.”

“Please. I wouldn’t know how.”

“Um, hello? Who better to teach you than yours truly?”

Joey laughs at the idea. “Thank you for the offer, Audrey, but I think I’ll pass for now.”

“Your loss,” the blonde replies with a shrug. She sits herself up. “Are you sure this isn’t about something else?”

Joey knows what she’s implying and she groans in response. “When will you let this whole Pacey and me thing go?”

“Joey, you’re blind,” Audrey defends, hands squeezing on her best friend’s leg. “The guy totally vibed with your family, you spent four days agonizing over the perfect gift for him, and he made a whole big romantic gesture for you after finding out you were upset over your ex. I know I’m blonde, but I’m not _that_ blonde.”

“You’re way off,” Joey says with a shake of her head. “He’s just that kind of guy. He would do that for any of us.”

“That _grump_? Really?”

“Yes,” Joey insists. “Plus, the holidays probably got to him and made him feel generous. You have to stop looking too into this. It’s not gonna happen.”

Audrey lifts her eyebrows, totally not buying it, but she lets the subject drop for now. “Alright, whatever you say, babe.” She gets up from her seat and heads towards the door. “I’m hungry. You want anything?”

“Just bring me some juice,” Joey says, sighing as her head hits her pillow.

Audrey closes the door behind her as she makes her way to the now familiar kitchen. She sees Pacey sitting on one of the stools, and silently smiles to herself as she passes by him to open the fridge. “What’s up, Pace?”

Pacey glances up from his plate of leftovers. “Second lunch.”

“As one does,” she teases. She takes out the fruit punch she knows Joey likes and closes the fridge door, before she leans herself on the kitchen island. She couldn’t help herself. “So I hear you and Joey had a fun holiday.”

Pacey rolls his eyes. “Y’know, we have an unspoken rule here in the loft that nobody bothers me during my second lunch,” Pacey lies with a fake grin. “You'd know that if you actually lived here.”

Audrey notes his reluctance to answer. “Well, Joey and I are a package deal,” she answers simply with a shrug.

“How lucky of us to be graced with both of you,” Pacey deadpans.

The blonde gives him a fake smile before going to grab a cup. “If you have a problem with me, Pacey, we should get that out of the way. You’re not gonna be able to date Joey if you can’t get along with her best friend.”

Pacey doesn’t hesitate to laugh. “You’re taking _Dumb Blonde_ to a whole new level, Liddell.”

“You think I can’t see right through your desperate teasing, but I can. We’re not so different, you and I.”

“I’m a lot of things, but I’m not desperate.” Pacey narrows his eyes. “Did Joey send you out here to be all weird, or something?”

“Why are you being so avoidant, Pacey?” Audrey claps back with raised brows. “Are you afraid to talk about your feelings or something?” She reaches for a half eaten bag of chips, and then sighs dramatically. “You’re such a typical Capricorn.”

“Because I have nothing to talk to _you_ about, we’re not friends. And I'm not avoiding anything, I’m just trying to enjoy my stir fry.”

“You don’t think we’re friends?” Audrey asks with a dramatic hand to her chest. “I’ll crack you, Pace. I will.”

“I _know_ that we’re not friends, now if you’ll excuse me.” Pacey grabs his plate and stands up, bumping into Jen as she enters the room. “Oops.”

“Sorry!” Jen yelps, avoiding Pacey’s eyes and looking at Audrey. “Hey!” The girl practically beams with relief at the company. “What’s up? Interrupting Pacey’s second lunch?”

Audrey straightens herself up slightly, clearing her throat. “Yep. And stealing some of your food,” she says as she shows off the bag of chips. “Are you up to anything today? Joey and I are just having some girl talk in her room if you wanna join us.”

Jen throws her a smile as she opens the fridge. “I have plans to see someone today,” she says, eyes quickly darting to Pacey. Luckily, he’s too busy narrowing his eyes at Audrey, who looks a little disappointed by the news. Jen adds, “But I’ll see you at the party tomorrow, right?”

“Of course,” Audrey quickly replies, beaming. “I wouldn’t miss it.”

“Great.” Jen closes the fridge after grabbing her soda can and throws Audrey another smile as she goes back into her room, avoiding Pacey’s eyes again.

Pacey walks back to the island, setting his plate down, his eyes still narrowed at Audrey. “Oh my god, now I get it…”

Audrey blinks, remembering that he’s still in the room. “Get what?”

“Why you’re always coming over. It’s not just about Joey. It’s about Jen.” Pacey chuckles as he sits back down.

Audrey shakes her head, not wanting him to see her blush. “What about Jen? I have no idea what you’re going on about, Witter.”

“Oh man, you’re a worse liar than Joey.” Pacey grins. “I knew there was a reason you were _always_ around. I thought you were just clingy, but you’re actually into Jen.”

The blonde scoffs defensively. “First off, I’m literally an actress. Lying is my _job_. Second off, I am _not_ into Jen. You’re the one who likes someone in this loft. Don’t try to change this on me.”

“I literally hate everyone in this loft, you included,” Pacey shrugs easily, “Jen’s a lovely girl though, you have great taste! And she’s depressingly single so you’ve got a shot. Even if you _are_ annoying.”

Audrey rolls her eyes, setting her things down for a moment. Then she lays her elbows down on the kitchen island so she can get closer to Pacey, eyes narrowing. “You do not want to play this game with me, Pace. You say a single word and I manipulate you and Joey into a locked room until you two kiss.”

Pacey’s still smiling, enjoying himself. “You say that like Joey wouldn’t be the one breaking down the door to kill you.” He lowers his voice, “Me telling Jen wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure about Joey,” she retorts, trying to break him down. “I would be sure about me kicking your ass if you mutter a single word to Jen, though. Especially when you’ve got nothing to go off of.”

Pacey places his fork down slowly. “I don’t need anything to go off of. Once the idea’s in her head, she’ll notice it for herself, won’t she?”

Audrey picks up his fork as soon as he sets it down and points it threateningly at him. “Not unless you want me to stab your eyes out.”

Pacey raises his hands up in defense. “Look. I’m not actually going to say anything to her, I’m not _that_ much of a dick. But, in return, no more comments about me and Joey. Talk about nothing to go off of.”

She ponders on that for a moment. He’s lying through his teeth, she knows that. She notices how his posture changes every time Joey walks into a room, and how he looks at her when she’s not looking. Everyone always thinks that Audrey is self obsessed to a fault, but she can pick up on things that interest her --- and her best friend being ogled is one of them. Too bad the guy is a total idiot. And now a blackmailer. “Fine,” Audrey gives in, setting the fork back down. She goes over to pick up her stuff and begins her way back to Joey’s room before anything else can happen. “This conversation never happened,” she whispers into Pacey’s ear menacingly as she passes by him.

“I’ve already forgotten about it,” Pacey mumbles, leaning away from her as he goes back to his food.

* * *

“I can’t believe we’re doing all this because you were too chicken to tell Pacey you hooked up with his sister during Christmas,” Jack complains as he puts up more New Year’s decorations up in the living room.

Jen is quick to shush him. “Keep your voice down, will you?” She sighs while setting down some snacks on their table. “I couldn’t think properly with everyone in the room and you eyeing me all weird. I just need to find the right moment.”

“Jen, you’ve had a crush on Gretchen for years. I’m sure Pacey knows that already.”

“Well, a crush is much different than sex, Jack.” Jen passes her best friend some extra tape. “I just have to think of the right way to tell him.”

“I don’t think that exists, J.”

“Well, it has to.” Jen insists.

“The longer you wait, the worse his reaction will be. At the end of the day, he’ll get over it. We’re all adults.”

Pacey enters, catching the tail end of the conversation. “Speak for yourself, Jackers. I’ve still got some growing up to do.”

Jen quickly goes into the kitchen to busy herself further away from Pacey. He takes a seat on their couch. “Jack, are your football friends coming?”

“A few, and some people from work, too,” Jack updates. “What about you, Pace?”

“Couple guys from the bar, Gretchen and some of her friends, and--”

“Gretchen’s coming?” Jen asks, stumbling over her feet as she enters the room — which causes her to spill a bowl of pretzels all over the floor.

Jack sighs, rushing to help her clean up the mess and throwing her a sorry look.

“Why? Is that not okay…?” Pacey asks as he gets up to bring over the trash can.

“No, it’s fine!” Jen quickly assures him. “I love Gretchen. I mean, I don’t _love her_ love her, but she’s ---”

“You’ll have to excuse Jen,” Jack is quick to come to her rescue, cutting her off before she says something else stupid. “She’s a bit off her rocker while trying to throw this party together.” Jen throws him a silent thank you and catches her breath.

“I’d feel bad, but this party is your doing.” Pacey shrugs, helping them clean up the pretzels. “And by the way, I’m bringing a date, so no one is allowed to be weird tonight.”

Jack pauses, looking up at Pacey. “ _You're_ bringing a date?!” He shares one of his looks with Jen where the two of them have a whole conversation with their eyebrows. “Who is it?”

“I met him at the bar, his name’s Adam.” Pacey brings the garbage can back into the kitchen.

“You broke your little rule about not hitting on customers? He must be hot!” Jack comments.

“He is, and _he_ hit on _me_ , so technically no rules were broken. He’s pretty cool, we got drinks before Christmas and I figured I’d invite him tonight.” Pacey grabs a beer from the fridge.

“Oh, how exciting! I can't wait to meet him, Pace!” Jen smiles, getting herself back together.

Joey walks into the living room, antsy from being in her room all morning. “Wait, who are we meeting?” she asks as she takes a seat on the couch.

“Pacey’s bringing a guy tonight,” Jen tells her, grateful that the conversation has steered far away from her.

“What? On the _one_ night I’m not here?” Joey asks, half-heartedly hurt as she looks over to Pacey.

“Ooh, it’s almost like I did that on purpose,” Pacey jokes, and Joey sticks her tongue out at him in response. He laughs. “It was last minute, I ran into him last night and we made plans.”

Joey can’t really explain why she feels a little upset, as if she doesn’t have a date tonight herself. So she resorts to teasing. “I’m surprised your eye rolling and old smelly T-Shirts were able to score you someone.”

Pacey rolls his eyes, hesitating to joke back. “Luckily the whole bar is smelly, so he doesn’t realize _I’m_ also smelly. By the time he realizes, he’ll already be in love with me.”

“Which is so easy to do,” Jen says with a smile, and Jack holds back a chuckle at how hard she’s buttering Pacey up.

“I forgive you for the stupid party, Lindley, stop being so weird.” Pacey waves Jen off, turning back to Joey, “What are you and AJ up to tonight?”

“Oh,” Joey says, a little caught off guard by his question --- and the fact that he cares. “I’m going over to his friend’s house for a small party. He didn’t tell me much.” She shrugs. “It’s not a big deal, I promise. I’m probably just gonna miss you guys the entire time.”

“Aw, Jo,” Jack says, taking a seat beside her and wrapping his arm around her shoulders. “Every little bird has to leave the nest someday,” he teases.

Joey is about to quip back when they all hear the door open, and Audrey walks in like she lives there. She stops in her tracks once she notices they’re all looking at her. “What? I’m here to help Joey get ready.”

“Sure you are,” Pacey says under his breath.

* * *

Jen has already anxiously drank four cups worth of their spiked punch.

“Jen, you gotta cool it,” Jack warns as he takes her cup away and sets it down. “You’re gonna be even more likely to spill if you’re drunk.”

“Is Gretchen here yet?” She asks, tapping her fingers on her thigh.

“She hasn’t arrived since you asked me two minutes ago, no.”

“This is horrible,” Jen groans before she notices Pacey walking toward her and Jack with who she can only assume is his date.

Adam has dark curly hair and stubble, and Pacey has a bashful smile planted on his face as they walk up to his best friends. “Hey guys, this is Adam.”

Jen waves and Jack shakes his hand as Pacey continues, “This is Jen and Jack, and before they say anything, let me assure you that I’m the normal one.”

Adam laughs. “Nice to meet you guys, Pacey’s told me all about you.”

“Yeah, we’re kind of a big deal,” Jack jokes, glancing at Jen, whose eyes meet Gretchen’s from across the loft. She was taking her coat off. Jen reaches for her cup again and practically chugs the rest of her drink before Jack can stop her.

“Whoa, Lindley,” Pacey laughs quietly, “Everything okay?”

“Everything’s great! This punch is just _really_ good.” Jen smiles, focusing her gaze on Adam now. “It’s great to meet you, Adam. Pacey hasn’t introduced us to anyone he's liked in so long. Since before Andie, so _a while_. God, is anyone else warm? It’s warm in here. I miss East Coast winters. Where are you from Adam?”

Adam glances at Pacey awkwardly, smiling. “Seattle. I’ve never been to the East Coast.”

“Oh, you’re missing out! Me and Jack were just back in New York for the holidays, it was great! I mean, not _great_ , just okay. Nothing exciting.” Jen feels out of breath, glancing behind Pacey and Adam at Gretchen, who seems to be making her way over to them. She panics for an excuse. “I should refill some of the snacks.”

Jen gives one more awkward smile to Adam and Pacey before scurrying off to the kitchen. Jack sighs, a little defeated. “I’m sorry about her, she’s… homesick,” Jack lies terribly, patting Pacey’s arm before going after his best friend.

Pacey stands there dumbfounded, too embarrassed to look at his date. “I’m so sorry. I have no idea what’s going on with her lately.”

“It’s fine, Pacey. They seem cool,” Adam assures him, clearly trying his best to sound sincere. “You’re right, they do seem like a couple at first glance.”

“Yeah, I’ve been third-wheeling them for years,” Pacey laughs, glancing toward the kitchen and noticing his sister doing the same. “Gretchen, hey!”

Gretchen turns to her brother with a frazzled look. “Hi, Pace,” She glances toward Jen in the kitchen again. “I’ll be right back.”

Pacey watches his sister walk away and can’t help but wonder if she had anything to do with all the weirdness lately. “Uh, that was my sister.”

Adam nods with a smile. “Your genetics don’t fail, I see.”

* * *

Joey had been anxious all through getting ready, despite Audrey’s constant reassurance that she’d be fine and she looked gorgeous. Then, she had a pit in her stomach the entire car ride over, even in Jen’s cute yellow Volkswagen beetle that she borrowed. She didn’t feel like this at the Christmas party when she brought AJ over. So why the hell was _this_ so hard? Was it because she wouldn’t have her friends around this time? AJ was a good guy, though. A great one, even. Surely he’d have great friends, too.

So why was she dreading this?

Joey made herself promise to give Jack a huge slap in the arm once she got home. He was the one getting in her head about all this dating stuff.

But then again, if _Pacey_ could do it, why couldn’t she?

Already exhausted from her overthinking, Joey finally pulls up to the address AJ had texted her. He said he’d meet her outside so she wouldn’t have to walk in alone, which was sweet — and true to his word, she quickly spots him, hands in his pockets awaiting her patiently. She gathers herself before getting out of the car and greets him with a wave and a smile.

“You made it!” AJ instantly exclaims at the sight of her. He kisses her cheek.

“Of course,” Joey replies easily, despite the fact that her brain was still running.

“I promise that as soon as it hits midnight I will get you out of that door,” he assures her. “And until then I think I managed to convince them to no family talk, no school talk, and no questions about our sex life.” Joey blushes instantly, and he catches her. “I’m joking, I’m joking!”

She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear nervously. “I know,” she says, but her face still feels hot.

To save her from further embarrassment, probably, AJ finally rings the doorbell. His friends greet him with excited hellos and then give her friendly smiles as they welcome her inside. There’s about five other people already in the living room, filling the place with chatter. AJ’s best friend, who Joey learns is called Morgan, shows her to the kitchen to get herself some refreshments. AJ follows her faithfully.

“We’re really glad you came,” Morgan tells her with a smile as she passes her a red plastic cup.

“Thanks for inviting me,” Joey says with a smile as she looks over her drink options. “I’m happy to be here. You guys seem great.”

“Let the alcohol hit and we’ll see if that’s true,” Morgan jokes with a wink.

Joey pours herself some vodka and orange juice, and then AJ brings her over to meet the rest of his friends.

“Hey guys,” AJ says to the small crowd, giving out hugs and handshakes. Joey sips her drink a little awkwardly. AJ turns back to her with a smile, and puts his arm around her shoulders. “Everyone, this is my girlfriend, Joey.”

Joey almost chokes on her spiked juice.

* * *

A couple hours into the party now, Jen has been doing her best to avoid Pacey. It’s pretty easy since he’s so wrapped up in Adam. They’ve spent most of the night in their own little world, which makes it easy for Gretchen to pull Jen into Joey’s room. While Gretchen shuts the door, Jen whispers very loudly, “What are we doing in here?”

“How drunk are you right now?” Gretchen asks worriedly.

Jen shrugs, sitting on Joey’s bed. “You didn’t answer my question, Miss Witter.”

“We’re talking, that’s what we’re doing. Jack says you’ve been acting weird all week. If you keep this up, Pacey’s going to figure it out.” Gretchen crosses her arms, clearly just as anxious as Jen.

“I’ve been trying to tell him. I really have. I just think if I go about it the right way, then he won’t even care--”

Gretchen interrupts her, “What if we don’t tell him?”

Jen freezes. “What?”

“Pacey is an adult and I know he’d get over us sleeping together, but it just feels useless to stir up drama over a one-time thing. Especially with his birthday being tomorrow, I just don’t want to feed into his stupid _Birthday Curse_ theory.” Gretchen sits next to Jen. “We just… We got caught up in the moment. I’d had a rough day with my family and I shouldn’t have let it happen. I’m sorry.”

Jen nods to herself, unable to look at Gretchen. Her stomach hurt, and she knew that it wasn’t the alcohol’s fault. “Don’t be sorry, Gretchen, it’s fine. _I’m_ sorry for spinning out like this, but ---” Jen looks at Gretchen finally, too drunk to hold back. “I’ve had a crush on you since before I even knew I was gay. It’s just always been there and _you’ve_ always been there. And now, I don’t know how to act like nothing happened.”

Gretchen sighs, holding Jen’s gaze firmly and wishing she wasn’t so touched by what she said. “Okay, then I’ll tell him. It’s fine. I just -- I am sorry. I’m _really_ sorry.”

“You don’t have to take the fall for me,” Jen insists, her head spinning a little.

Gretchen holds onto Jen’s shoulder to help stable her, shaking her head with a smile. “If it gets you to stop acting like this, I’ll do it. You’ve lost your New York wild girl touch, Jen,” she teases.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m a big girl, I can handle my alcohol.”

“Clearly,” Gretchen says with a chuckle. “Are we okay?”

Jen looks up at her, suddenly realizing she was way closer than she expected. If she really wanted to, she’d barely have to lean in to kiss her again. And Jen’s poor intoxicated (and very gay) brain wanted to do nothing more. But the sober part of her keeps her together, and she manages to nod slightly. “Of course we are.” Too bad she isn’t sober enough to stop herself from asking quietly, “Do you regret it?”

Gretchen exhales, surprised by the question. She moves her hand up from Jen’s shoulder to her cheek, and she instantly softens at how the blonde leans into it gently. “I could never.”

“So I was good?” Jen asks genuinely.

“Yes,” Gretchen assures with a laugh. “You certainly knew what you were doing.”

“It’s not like I hadn’t dreamt about it for half my life,” Jen says with a chuckle.

“Well, I hope it lived up to it.”

Jen can’t handle this. She leans in closer. “It was everything I wanted. And more.”

Gretchen should be the responsible one and lean away, but she couldn’t stop herself. Just as she gives in and slowly starts to lean closer, the door of Joey’s room opens and Pacey’s voice breaks the silence, “So this is Joey’s room, she--”

Pacey freezes, dropping Adam’s hand as he furrows his brow. Jen quickly backs away from Gretchen and attempts to stand, but ends up falling back to sit on the bed. “Pacey, hey,” she greets awkwardly.

“What’s going on?”

Gretchen stands up. “Can I talk to you, Pace?”

“Is _this_ why you’ve been acting so weird, Jen? You and Gretchen—?”

“No!” Jen attempts to lie, but Gretchen interrupts, “I was going to tell you after your birthday.”

“It’s fine,” Pacey lies. To anyone else, he could’ve gotten away with it, but Jen and Gretchen knew him too well, so he adds, “We can talk tomorrow, it’s fine.”

“Really?” Gretchen asks doubtfully.

Pacey nods. “I’m giving Adam a tour, and was really looking forward to showing him Joey’s lame bookmark collection.”

Adam smiles awkwardly behind Pacey, taking his hand gently. Gretchen helps Jen stand, feeling awkward. “Okay, we’ll just… Leave you to it, then. Sorry again. I didn’t want to ruin your birthday.”

“You didn’t, it’s fine.” Pacey repeats, keeping his eyes away from his sister. Gretchen and Jen awkwardly leave the room. It’s silent for a long moment before Adam pulls Pacey into the room and attempts to change the subject. “So when’s your birthday?”

Pacey laughs a little, trying to shake the awkwardness of what he’d walked in on. “Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?! I can't believe you didn’t tell me!” Adam laughs, eyes on Pacey as he looks around Joey’s room.

“I’m not a fan of my birthday, things like that tend to happen. Or much worse.” Pacey explains, turning to face Adam. He tries not to let it weigh on him, but he can’t stop thinking about Jen and Gretchen. In general, something felt off.

Adam nods a little before pulling Pacey to sit down at the foot of Joey’s bed. “We can talk about it if you want, Pacey.”

Pacey smiles, happy to have Adam here with him, but also kind of wishing he was alone to process whatever the hell just happened. But dumping this on Adam during their first date didn’t feel right, so Pacey shakes his head. “No, I’ll worry about it next year.”

Adam laughs, scrunching his nose up cutely. “Oh god, you’re one of _those_ people?!”

Pacey grins, nodding confidently before standing back up. “Come on, I wasn’t kidding about those bookmarks.”

* * *

Joey had been hiding out in this bathroom for almost ten minutes now. People are probably thinking disgusting or awful things are happening in here, but she can’t bother to worry about that right now.

Since when was she AJ’s _girlfriend_? They had never talked about that. Well, she was hoping they would tonight, but clearly, that was now out of the window. This relationship had dashed off while she was stuck clueless in its passenger seat.

She couldn’t figure out why this bothered her so much. It’s not like Joey _wouldn’t_ date AJ — he was sweet, he was cute, he treated her well. He’d be a great boyfriend. But for some reason, hearing the words come out of his mouth made her feel… Well, disappointed. Or maybe scared? A mess of feelings, really. Feelings she couldn’t pinpoint or understand.

So here she was, pacing back and forth in a stranger’s tiny bathroom, trying to figure out how to not ruin a party. And with only two hours to midnight.

She could put it off and deal with it tomorrow. She could suck it up and put on a happy face and act like nothing’s wrong. She could let AJ show her off all night, and pretend as if she didn’t want to crawl into her own skin every time he touched her now.

But she had never been a great liar.

Joey takes a deep breath as she looks at herself in the mirror. She’d spent so long getting herself ready, and Audrey had been right — she looked quite good in her sparkling blue dress tonight, if she dared to admit it. But she felt awful. She couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off.

She finally summons up the courage to walk back out, and finds AJ sitting in the corner of the living room with Morgan. Their knees are touching and they’re laughing about something, and she yearns for the clear familiarity they share. AJ had told her that they’d been best friends for years — since kindergarten, basically. Her heart hurts, knowing she once had that with someone until he threw it all away for someone else. Someone prettier and more talented than her. Someone better.

AJ gets closer to whisper something to Morgan, but to any stranger, it almost looks like they were about to kiss. Joey even swears she catches their eyes fluttering to each other’s lips for a split moment.

She forces herself to snap out of it and walks up to him, finger poking his shoulder to get his attention.

“Oh, hey!” AJ says with a grin. “I was wondering where you ran off to. What’s up?”

“Can we talk?” Joey asks bluntly.

He tilts his head, surprised at her clear shift in attitude. “Sure.” He smiles at Morgan and she waves him off, and Joey takes his hand to lead him to an empty bedroom where she closes the door behind them.

“Are you okay? Did one of my friends say something stupid?” AJ quickly asks.

“No, they’re all great,” Joey assures him. She sighs before continuing, “We never talked about me being your girlfriend.”

“Oh.” He’s clearly hurt, and Joey instantly wishes she just waited to deal with this. But it’s too late now. “I’m sorry if I assumed, but we’ve been going out for a bit and I just…” He trails off, shrugging.

“We’ve barely gone on a proper date,” Joey says, crossing her arms defensively.

“You took me to meet your friends for Christmas. You’re here meeting mine. I’d say those instances matter more than some dates.”

“I disagree.”

AJ runs his hand in his hair nervously. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know you had a checklist to follow.”

That gets her. “Well, _I’m_ sorry that I don’t want such a big title just handed to me without any proper conversation about it!”

“Woah, okay.” AJ throws his hands up. “Do we really have to do this tonight?”

“I think we do.”

AJ sighs, taking a seat on the bed. “So, what are you saying, Joey? You’re angry because you don’t wanna be my girlfriend? Is that it?”

Joey takes a second to process his question, but the answer is easy no matter how badly she wants it not to be. Defeated, she says, “Yes.”

“Well.” AJ chuckles humorlessly. “Then that’s that.”

She feels awful, but at the same time, a huge weight lifts off her shoulders. She slowly takes a seat beside him. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to ruin your night, but when you said that, it just…” She throws him an apologetic look. “It didn’t feel right.”

He nods sadly. “Okay.”

There’s an awkward silence as he processes everything, and Joey just wants to run off and never show her face again out of shame. “AJ, you’re a wonderful guy. You are. But I haven’t dated in years, and my last boyfriend cheated on me. So I’m a little rusty, to say the least.” She twiddles her thumbs nervously. “I just think we moved way too fast and I wasn’t ready.”

He smiles at her and she knows he means it, despite it not reaching his eyes. “I understand.”

Joey lets out a sigh. “Well, I should go. You can tell your friends I got sick or something,” she tells him as she stands up. “I really am sorry.”

“I know. I am, too. I never meant to rush you.”

She nods, throwing him a smile. “Are we okay?”

He stands up too. “Of course.” He places a kiss on her forehead and she’s so insanely grateful that this didn’t end in flames. “We’re still friends, right?” he asks as he pulls away. “Because I will absolutely need a study partner for finals.”

Joey can’t help but laugh. “I got you. Don’t even worry about it.” She’s about to reach for the door handle, but she stops herself. “And AJ?” He turns to look at her. “I know it’s not my place, but… You and Morgan are really sweet together.”

Despite his best efforts, AJ blushes, and she knows she’s right. Good. He deserves that.

He chuckles with a shake of his head. “You think she’ll agree to be my New Year’s kiss if I tell her I just got dumped?”

Joey grins, reaching over to squeeze his hand. “Go get her.”

She waves him goodbye as she finally opens the door, and she’s easily able to sneak out of the party and head back home.

* * *

Joey opens her door to find way more people than she expected, and lively chatter filling the room. No one really notices that she’s arrived, which is good. She easily makes her way to the kitchen, where Jack is obviously residing, filling up on snacks.

He raises his brows at the sight of her. “What are you doing here?”

“Hello to you, too,” she teases, grabbing herself a cup. “It’s a long story.”

Jack catches on quickly. “Are you okay?” he asks quietly.

Joey loves that he knows something happened without her having to say anything. It’s a familiarity she’s been missing, but it’s been right under her nose for months now. She throws him a smile. “I’m fine. I promise.”

He nods, but he still comes over to lay a kiss on her forehead.

“So, what did I miss?” Joey asks as she takes a sip of her punch.

“Not much,” Jack answers with a shrug, popping another gummy bear in his mouth. “Pacey is just a little upset because he found out Jen slept with Gretchen in New York.”

Joey almost chokes on her drink for the second time that night. “What?!” she almost yells. “I leave for four hours and _this_ happens?”

“Well, that’s why Jen’s been weird. Pacey walked in on them in your room like ten minutes ago. That’s as far as I’ve heard.”

“ _My_ room?!”

Jack laughs. “Nothing happened! I _think_ ,” he adds with narrowed eyes, joking.

“I seriously can’t leave you guys unsupervised ever again,” Joey says with a shake of her head.

“Welcome back to the loft,” Jack teases, popping one last gummy bear into his mouth.

Joey did not expect to get so overwhelmed so quickly, so she B-lines to her bedroom before anyone else can catch her so she can get herself together. Hopefully no one was getting it on in there right now.

Unfortunately, God has a sick sense of humor. She opens her door to find Pacey and who she can only assume is his date --- especially given the fact that they’re kissing on her bed.

“Oh, God!” Joey can’t help but exclaim as she freezes in her doorway. “Sorry!” She covers her eyes, panicked. “I didn’t mean to --- I didn’t think anyone would be --- you know what, it’s fine. Sorry!”

Pacey almost jumps at his roommate’s overreaction, pulling his hand from Adam’s face instinctively, “Joey?! God—“

“Sorry,” Adam practically whispers, his face reddening instantly. “Um, you must be Joey.” She waves awkwardly with a nod.

“You’re back early,” Pacey adds quietly, averting her eyes. “Is AJ here?”

Joey closes the door behind her, leaning against it. “Nope.” She’s still a little shaken, but she uncovers her eyes slowly.

Pacey tilts his head slightly, already over the awkwardness of being caught, but changing the subject as smoothly as possible. “So, this is Adam. I was just giving him a tour…”

Adam waves awkwardly, leaning against Pacey slightly. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Yeah, you too,” Joey says. “I’m sorry to interrupt, I just, um. Well, I wanted my room.”

Adam stands up, pulling Pacey by the hand. “Of course.”

“Sorry again, Jo.” Pacey clears his throat, wanting to ask her what happened with AJ. Instead, he squeezes Adam’s hand. “We should probably finish the tour.”

Joey steps out of the way so they can reach the door, and throws an uncomfortable smile at Pacey before the two of them finally walk out. She closes the door behind them and instantly falls face first onto her bed. Since when had her _room_ become such a prime make out destination?

* * *

Audrey hears that Joey arrived and quickly finds her best friend under her sheets in her bedroom. Audrey tilts her head lovingly, taking a seat on the edge of the bed.

“Hey, buttercup,” she says sweetly. “I will forgive you for the fact that you didn’t say hello to me because apparently you’ve had a hard night.”

Joey lifts herself up slightly. “I broke up with _him_ , Audrey.”

The blonde can’t help but gasp. “Wait, really?!”

“Yes, really,” Joey replies, hands covering her face. “Don’t ask me why. It just happened.”

Audrey throws her hands up defensively. “Alright. So if you’re okay, why are you hiding out here? All your friends are waiting for you outside.”

Joey groans into her palms. “I know, but I was just suddenly very overwhelmed with information about people in this loft and I am not fit to process everything.”

“Ooh, you have gossip? Spill.”

Joey rolls her eyes, but she still sits up. “I’m sure you’ll find out soon enough, seeing as you’re an honorary member of this loft.”

“Aw, you think so?” Audrey says with a dramatic hand to her heart. “Thank you kindly.” She stands up from the bed. “No, but seriously. Let’s get you out of here and back to the party. It’s, like, an hour to midnight, and if I can’t convince one of Pacey’s cute bartender co-workers to kiss me, you are going to have to take one for the team.” She holds her hand out for her best friend.

Joey can’t help but laugh. “As long as you don’t end up making out on my bed with someone tonight, I’ll be elated,” she says as she takes Audrey’s hand and gets up.

“Shoot. Too late,” Audrey jokes with a wince, and Joey slaps her arm through a chuckle.

She _better_ be kidding.

* * *

After giving Adam the rest of the quick loft tour, Pacey ended up taking a phone call from his brother. It caught him off guard, since he hadn’t heard from any of his family since skipping Christmas. He’s hiding in his room during the short call, unsure of how it'll go. As he’s saying bye to his brother, someone knocks on his door. Assuming it’s Adam, Pacey gets up to open the door and apologize. Instead, Jen is standing in front of him with a tall glass of water and a forced smile. He opens the door and nods for her to come in.

“Yeah, thanks again, Dougie. Happy New Year.” Pacey tries his best to sound genuine before hanging up.

Jen can’t help but look surprised. “Dougie called?”

Pacey nods, tossing his phone onto his bed as he sits down. “Surprisingly not the weirdest thing to happen tonight.”

Jen winces after closing the door behind her. “Pace, I really am sorry. It’s okay if you’re mad.”

“It’s fine, Jen. I mean, not really. But, y’know, shit happens.” Pacey shrugs, allowing himself to be miserable for a moment. “It’s like an early birthday present.”

Jen sighs sadly. “Please don’t say that, Pacey. The last thing I wanted was to make you upset, it’s why I was practically killing myself over figuring out the right way to tell you.”

“Well, now’s probably the best time to do that. At this point, filling in the blanks myself has been pretty traumatic.” Pacey pats the edge of the bed next to him gently.

Jen exhales loudly, preparing herself for what’s to come. She sets her cup of water down and sits a little further away from him than he probably expected, but she couldn’t be too careful. “Well, uh…” Before she gets herself into another panicked mess, Jen finally just spits it out. “Gretchen and I slept together in New York.” She closes her eyes, not wanting to see his reaction.

Pacey’s quiet for a moment, his eyebrows raised in shock. “ _That’s_ the best way to tell me that you slept with my sister? _Oh my god!_ ” Pacey stands up, running a hand down his face. “I thought you, like, kissed or something. Or finally grew a pair and told her you’re obsessed with her. I can’t believe you slept with her!”

“I’m sorry!” Jen pleads anxiously. “Your sister is hot, Pacey. And _she_ kissed _me_! What do you expect me to do?!”

“Not sleep with her, that’s for sure!!!” Pacey can’t help but raise his voice just a bit, not in anger, but more in shock. “There are _other_ hot girls all over the place, sleep with them instead! Hell, our loft is full of _other_ hot girls right now!”

“Oh,” Jen says, catching onto his small slip. “You mean Joey?”

Pacey doesn’t pick up on what she’s insinuating, too caught up in the moment to even go there. “Sure, go sleep with Joey! I'm not stopping you. Just not _Gretchen_.”

“Please,” Jen scoffs. “ _As if_ you wouldn’t be jealous if I managed to score Joey.”

Pacey’s expression morphs into complete confusion now. “What are you even talking about?!”

“Oh, you’re telling me you _didn’t_ bring a date tonight just because you knew _she_ had one?” the blonde interrogates with her arms crossed.

“ _What?!_ ” Pacey practically shrieks, shaking his head. “I have no idea what it is you’re trying to make this about, Lindley. But it’s about _you_ and _Gretchen_. Not me and who I’m dating.”

“Gretchen and I aren’t dating. You can be at ease about that.”

“Whether you’re dating or not, you were about five seconds away from making out in Joey’s bed before I walked in.” Pacey sighs, already coming down from his little fit. “It’s just not how I would’ve liked to find out, okay? You could’ve told me sooner.”

Jen brings a hand to her face, practically groaning into it. “Trust me, Pace, this wasn’t how I wanted to tell you. I tried, I really did. I’m sorry I screwed everything up.”

Pacey feels a pit in his stomach and sits back down next to Jen. “You didn’t screw anything up. I mean, if you liking my sister was a deal breaker, this friendship would’ve been over the day we met. I just need time to process, and you two clearly do too. Just let me be bitchy for a couple days and then I’ll get over it, I promise.”

“Really?” Jen asks softly. “Look, Pacey, your friendship means more to me than anything. I mean, yeah, I’ve always liked Gretchen, but I never thought anything would actually happen. And, well, she says it was a one-time thing anyway.” Jen sighs, reaching for Pacey’s hand to squeeze it. “But even if there was a chance, I would never take it if you didn’t want me to.”

Pacey shrugs. “I don’t know, Jen. No offense, but I never thought anything would ever happen either. Life is too messy for me to consider what I’d ever do if you guys dated and it ended badly. But I’m the last person who’d ever want the people I love to hold back just because of me.” He pauses before continuing, “My one request is to just go to Jack and Joey about this for a while, because I don’t know if I can handle hearing about it just yet. It’s too real.” Pacey squeezes her hand gently.

Jen nods. “Understandable and doable. I love you, but you’re the last person I would go to with this, anyway. Though I doubt there will be much to report.” She lets out a sigh of relief. “I’m just glad you know now.”

“That makes one of us,” Pacey says as he lets out an awkward laugh. “I’m stuck between wishing you'd told me sooner and wishing I didn’t know at all. And not to sound like an asshole, but it’s really unfair of you to not have any siblings. Y’know, to sleep with as revenge.”

“What a shame,” Jen plays along with a laugh, insanely grateful that he was taking this way better than she expected.

“Also, I’d say sleeping with your best friend’s sister while he’s stuck working on Christmas earns you about…. $50 to the Dumbass Jar.” Pacey pats her back gently before standing up, and Jen groans at his totally fair demand. She _knew_ he would squeeze that in. He grins at her before placing a kiss on her cheek. “Happy early birthday to me!”

* * *

When Pacey follows Jen back into the party, his eyes immediately land on Audrey flirting with a bunch of his co-workers. Even Adam is there, laughing at something she had said. Pacey can’t help but hope that nobody spilled the beans about Jen and Gretchen to her yet. Let her finish the year without knowing that the girl she has a crush on is hopelessly hung up on someone else.

From across the loft, he spots Joey alone in the kitchen, not even trying to look interested in the party. He sighs, glancing at Audrey again before he makes his way over to Joey. “Hey, Potter.”

It’s half an hour to midnight, and Joey is trying to force herself to be excited. She’s failing miserably. She’s by herself in the kitchen, eating some M&M’s from a bowl like a stereotypical sad person in a crowd of a bunch of happy people. She hates it. Thankfully, someone comes over. Joey looks up, a smile instantly on her face from seeing who it is. “Hey, Witter. Have you come to save me from my extremely depressing moment?”

“Nope, I just want some M&M’s,” he jokes with a straight face, leaning on the island next to her. “So, I’m guessing your party with AJ didn’t go well?”

“What gave you _that_ idea?”

“Definitely not you coming home two hours early just to scowl at our party while eating chocolate.” Pacey eats a few of the candies, watching the party continue in front of them.

“You’re quite the detective,” she teases with a laugh. She lets a moment pass in silence before sighing. “AJ and I decided to just be friends.”

Pacey nods, stealing a glance at her. “That’s probably for the best. I didn’t want to say it before, but that guy’s a bit of a dork. Even dorkier than you.”

She rolls her eyes at his backhanded dig. “Thanks, Pace.”

“Anytime,” Pacey laughs quietly, eyes falling on Jen as she joins Audrey on the couch. He can’t help but ask Joey the question that haunts him every New Year’s eve, “Do you think next year is gonna be as complicated as this one?”

Joey simply shrugs, stuffing more chocolate into her mouth. “We don’t have to worry about it till next year,” she jokes with a grin.

Pacey rolls his eyes, shaking his head gently. He can’t help but smile as he turns to look at his newest roommate. “Classic New Year’s eve comedy. Very nice.”

“I learned from the best.”

“Right,” Pacey nods, his eyes falling to the counter now as he considers all the ways this upcoming year could be horrible. Starting with his birthday tomorrow. “I’m sorry things didn’t work out with AJ.”

Joey waves him off quickly. “It was for the best.” She shifts herself to stand a bit closer to him, their arms touching. “I’m sorry about…” She throws a look at Jen, hoping it was enough for him to catch on.

Pacey follows her gaze, immediately sighing. “Ah, yeah. _That_.” He considers his next words carefully, turning back to Joey. “In a perfect world, the two people I love most on this planet could be happy together and everything could be great. But… I’m just too cynical to believe that could ever happen. It’ll get ugly and then what?”

Joey nods understandingly. “Sometimes I wish we could fast forward through all the bad and just get to the good, you know?” she says honestly before catching his eye. “Sorry that I don’t have any answers for you, Pace. I wish I did. I wish I could tell you that everything works out and we all end up happy, but life isn’t that simple.” She chuckles. “Guess I’m as much of a cynic as you are. You should’ve gone to Jack with this.”

Pacey finds himself smiling a bit sadly. Something about New Years always made him extra introspective. “Even if you had all the answers, I probably wouldn’t like hearing them. Things don’t tend to work out for me,” he sneaks in a little self-deprivation before softening. “I wouldn’t dream of bugging anyone but you about this, Potter. You kind of always know what to say.”

“I try,” Joey flaunts with a smile before bumping him gently on the shoulder. “But come on, Pace. You’re a great guy, and you’re doing fine. You and Adam seem to click,” she teases. “Though next time I would prefer to _not_ catch you two in my bed, if you don’t mind.”

“I’m sorry, I really was giving him a loft tour.”

“Sure you were.”

They both share a laugh, and Pacey adjusts the elbow he’s resting on the counter so that he’s fully facing Joey now. He’s still hung up on her compliment. He wasn't used to being told such nice things, especially by someone who isn't Gretchen, Jen, and Jack. Pacey isn’t sure how to respond, but he finally settles on a rare moment of sincerity. “I know I don’t say this enough. But I really am glad you moved in, Jo.”

She can’t help but soften at his words. She remembers him saying the same thing to her in the wedding photo booth months ago, and she comes to the conclusion that the moments that they share when they’re alone may be her favorites. “I’m glad, too.”

Pacey can’t help but smile back at her, wishing he had words to express just how glad he really is --- but he’d just have to save those for another day. However, that doesn’t stop him from glancing down at her lips with little to no subtlety. He even catches himself doing it, and suddenly he’s holding his breath as well. Joey notices it quickly, and suddenly her cheeks are flushed. She knows there’s people just across the room, she can still hear their lively chatter --- but it all becomes muffled. Somehow when she’s with Pacey, he makes her feel like they’re the only two people in a room. And she can’t stop herself from glancing at his lips, too.

It’s a moment of weakness, she knows this. She’s probably confused by what had gone down with AJ. But she suddenly realizes that Pacey always seemed to be there for her --- he’d gotten her to finally confront Dawson, he’d taken her to see Christmas lights when she was upset, and now he was comforting her even though he could be off with his date. Oh god, Pacey had a _date_. This wasn’t fair to him. And yet, Joey still catches herself leaning in a bit, eyes looking up to meet his.

At this point in Pacey’s life, he’s used to his own lack of self-control. Giving Joey the most universally understood signal for wanting to kiss her while his date sat across the room was the epitome of stupid. But when he notices Joey leaning in toward him, he’s nothing but surprised that _Joey Potter_ had suddenly sunk to his level of stupidity. And he was impressed for some reason. Before he can remind himself how bad of an idea this is, Pacey begins to lean in too.

Joey’s actually feeling butterflies in her stomach, and she wishes they would stop. They are not making this any easier. But before either of them can get through something they would probably both regret, Jack suddenly walks into the kitchen.

“Jo, are you in here?” he asks loudly, and she practically jumps back and almost knocks over the bowl of candy. Jack had clearly been drinking some punch since she last saw him. Meanwhile, Pacey turns away from Joey to lean on the counter again, staring forward at nothing in particular.

Joey clears her throat nervously, not daring to look at Pacey. “Yeah, what’s up?”

“It’s five minutes to midnight,” Jack says, making his way over to grab her hand. “I may be gay, but I still think we both deserve a nice New Year’s kiss, don’t you?”

She’s never blushed this hard in her life, and she’s glad Jack may be too drunk to remember. Or to catch on to what he _really_ walked into. “Sure,” she answers with an awkward laugh, putting a strand of hair behind her ear. “Why not?” She lets Jack whisk her away into the living room, and adds with an uncomfortable smile, “See you next year, Pace.”

Pacey just waves, watching them leave in silence. His heart is still beating uncontrollably, and he was sure it was a mixture of adrenaline and pure embarrassment. How could he be such an idiot to pull a stunt like that tonight? _And_ while Adam was right there in the next room? Pacey cranes his neck to look into the living room, and sees that Adam’s still on the couch with everyone. As if he could read Pacey’s mind, he glances up toward him and smiles. Pacey smiles back quickly, feeling himself calm down ever so slightly. _Everything’s fine_. It has to be.

* * *

“So, who’re you kissing in a few minutes?” Audrey asks Jen beside her, trying to play it cool. Ever since Jen had sat down she had looked a bit off, and that was the only proper explanation Audrey could think of for it.

Jen chuckles humorlessly. “Jack, probably.”

“You two are the most heterosexual gay people I have ever known,” Audrey teases with a roll of her eyes. “Come on, you have to kiss a girl!” Was she being too obvious?

Jen doesn’t seem to catch on. “There aren’t many here, unless Joey wants to take one for the team.” She cranes her neck and sees Joey being ushered away from the kitchen by Jack. “But it looks like I might be too late.”

Audrey gulps, forcing herself to stay cool. “ _I_ could kiss you,” she offers with a shrug.

“You?” Jen asks, surprised. She looks up and meets Audrey’s eyes with raised brows. “I thought you had, like, two guys already lined up.”

“I do. But there’s enough of me to go around.”

Jen laughs, for real this time. “Well, then. Who am I to say no to a quick New Year’s peck from Audrey Liddell herself?”

Audrey has to keep herself from grinning too widely, so she’s grateful that Joey walks in the room. She gets up to hug her best friend, who seems like she’s coming down from a bad high or something. “You okay?”

Joey looks at her with pleading eyes. “I’ll tell you after.”

The broadcaster on the TV begins his countdown, saying they had two minutes to go. Everyone passes around champagne glasses and excitedly huddle up by the screen, getting party blowers ready. Jen comes over to Joey and forces a cheap party hat onto her head, and Joey tries her best to put on her best smile and forget whatever happened in the kitchen.

Pacey finally comes over to sit on the arm of the armchair that Adam is sitting in, smiling down at him. He feels a pang of guilt in his gut, while resting his arm around the back of the chair. Adam leans into him slightly as a silent _hello_. Pacey feels himself smiling genuinely at the contact, which is confusing to say the least. His heart had been racing over Joey just a few minutes ago, but he was still so happy to see Adam. He’s too exhausted from this evening to rack his brain about it --- _Adam_ is his date tonight and that’s all that matters. When the countdown gets down to the seconds, Pacey tugs Adam from his seat, counting along with an eye roll.

“Three, two, one…. Happy New Year!” The loft practically erupts with cheers and loud party blower sounds. Jack takes Joey by the waist and lays a quick peck on her mouth, and they both laugh childishly. He turns to do the same to Jen, but has to wait while she kisses Audrey for a second longer than he expected — but he’s too drunk to think too hard about it. Once she finally turns around he lays a kiss on her lips then on her cheek, and the two hug tightly.

“Love you, Will.”

“Love you, Grace.”

Joey goes over to give Audrey a big hug, then does the same for Jen. She looks around to find Pacey, and turns to see him kissing Adam.

 _Good for him,_ she forcibly tells herself.

After his kiss with Adam, Pacey hugs Jack with a pat on the back and then Jen too, his eyes finding Gretchen across the room. She looks so uncomfortable and out of place, even while surrounded by the handful of friends that she’d brought. Joey’s voice pulls him from his thoughts for a moment.

“Happy New Year, Pace,” Joey says, looking up at him with a smile and trying to pretend nothing major happened between them only ten minutes ago. “And happy birthday,” she adds with a chuckle.

“Thanks, Joey,” He smiles lightly, distracted, “Happy New Year. I’ll be right back,” He pats her arm awkwardly and makes his way across the room to his sister.

Joey tries not to look disappointed as she watches him walk away. It’s not like she was expecting anything, but she had been hoping for at least a hug or something. God, why did she lean in? She turns back to Jack, Jen, and Audrey, hoping they can distract her from her thoughts.

When Pacey makes it to Gretchen, he wraps his arms around her tightly. “Happy New Year, Gretchen.”

Gretchen hugs him back, whispering, “Happy Birthday, Pace.”

Pacey pulls away to smile at his sister, hating how sad she looks. “I’m so sorry,” Gretchen says.

He’s shaking his head before she even gets the words out. “No, you’re not allowed to be sorry on my Birthday, that’s _my_ job.”

Gretchen rolls her eyes, finally smiling a little. “I love you, baby brother.”

“Love you too.”

* * *

Joey couldn’t sleep. She kept replaying the moment she and Pacey had shared the night before over and over in her head, and it made her want to scream. Sure, she knew that they had gotten close, and she’d accepted that the teasing about the two of them was now a staple in this loft. But she never thought it would ever actually _lead_ to anything. Pacey was her friend above all --- not to mention a _roommate_ who slept across the hall from her. She didn’t even want to dare to think about all the complications that would arise if anything were to happen between them.

 _And nothing would,_ she assured herself. Clearly, what happened the night before was a stupid moment of weakness, confusion, drunkenness… horniness? God, she needed to get herself together. There were plenty of other men she could get involved with. She was not about to lose herself in the assured mess that would arise if she were to ever take a chance with Pacey, of all people. There was enough craziness in this apartment as it is.

She finally gets out of bed, convincing herself that 8am was a suitable hour. She makes her way into the kitchen, grateful for the fact that all her roommates weren’t really morning people, and most of them were probably hung over. She sees Audrey passed out on their couch and smiles to herself before making a cup of coffee.

Joey’s about to head quietly back into her room to busy herself with a book when she suddenly runs into someone and almost spills her drink. “Oh shoot ---”

“I’m so sorry,” the person says, and Joey glances up to find herself face to face with Adam. “I didn’t expect anyone to be awake right now.”

She didn’t know he had slept over, and suddenly her face is a little flushed. “Me neither,” she says with an awkward chuckle. “Good morning.”

Adam smiles, and she finally gets a good look at him. He’s charming, and his hair is all messy from sleeping but it still manages to look cute. She instantly recognizes that he’s wearing one of Pacey’s hoodies, and her heart beats faster beyond her control. Adam runs a hand through his hair before asking, “If it’s not too much trouble, would you mind making me a cup? I have an eight hour shift coming up.”

Joey freezes for a moment before finally snapping herself back. “Oh! Of course not.” She leads him into the kitchen and passes him a mug. “So, did you enjoy the party?”

“Absolutely,” Adam replies with a grin. “You guys sure know how to throw a bash.”

She can’t help but chuckle as she pours him some coffee. “Thank you for your review of 4D, please make sure to tell Yelp that on your way home,” she jokes easily.

“Will do,” he quips back effortlessly.

Joey stands there with her warm mug in her hands, not really sure how to excuse herself without being rude. “So, you and Pacey, huh?” The question leaves her mouth before she can stop it, and she instantly beats herself up for it.

Adam doesn’t notice because he’s too busy blushing. “He’s really great.”

“Yeah. He is.” Joey can’t lie when it comes to that.

“I know you’re probably really protective over him, so I’ll just come right out and say that I promise to do everything in my power not to hurt him.”

Joey softens instantly, throwing him a smile. “Good. I mean, I wouldn’t be able to do much more than yell a bunch of pretentious insults at you, but Jack can sure pack a punch. And Jen’s quite feisty for her tiny body, so you wouldn’t wanna get on her bad side, either.”

Adam laughs comfortably. “I wouldn’t dare.” He takes a sip of his coffee before continuing. “I’m embarrassingly excited to see where this goes,” he admits.

Joey catches her heart practically falling into her stomach, and she hates herself for it. She has no right to be upset at any of this, or to get in the way of Pacey finding happiness with someone so sweet. So she simply nods and hides her face behind a big gulp of caffeine.

The two of them sit there in silence for a bit, both caught up in their own heads, before Adam finally finishes his drink and stands up. “Thank you for this, Joey. Seriously, I needed it.”

“Anytime,” she says with a wave of her hand.

“I should head out so I’m not late,” he explains, stuffing his hands into his --- well, Pacey’s --- pockets. “Tell Pacey I say happy birthday, yeah? I tried, but I don’t really think he registered it,” he says with a sweet grin.

Joey throws him the best smile she can muster as she nods. “Of course. Have fun at work.”

“I’ll try.” And just like that he’s out the door, and Joey instantly reaches for some alcohol to pour into her next cup.

* * *

Joey falls asleep with a book in her hands, and is only woken up by Jen jumping on her bed.

“Hey, sleepy head,” the blonde says as she pokes her thigh. “It’s time for the Pacey surprise.”

Joey groans sleepily --- she had totally forgotten the loft had planned to wake up Pacey with some cake and presents today. She didn’t really know how to be around him right now, but with Jen beaming at her, she had to suck it up.

They wake up Audrey in the living room, who begs them for five more minutes, but is finally won over by the promise of coffee. The four of them get everything ready and chat quietly in the kitchen as if it was just another normal day in the loft, and Joey has to constantly stop herself from wincing anytime Pacey’s name is brought up. She needed to talk to him about everything, right?

“Okay, I feel like sleeping in until eleven is a good enough birthday present,” Jack announces to the group with a smile. “Shall we?”

Jen claps excitedly and even Audrey looks content as they all tiptoe to Pacey’s room. Joey hangs back behind everyone, trying to blend in as best as possible. Jack hands them leftover party blowers and counts them down silently.

“One,” he mouths, and the four of them blow aggressively on their noisemakers.

“Happy birthday!!” They all exclaim over each other, and Pacey flinches awake abruptly.

“No!” He groans, bringing his covers over his bare shoulders and head. “Leave me alone.”

Jen jumps on his bed. “Come on, you grump! We have presents and cake.” She pokes him repeatedly on the shoulder. “ _Pleeeease?_ ”

“Well, actually,” Audrey chimes in, “I was not informed of any of this, so all I have for you today is my presence. Which _is_ a present, actually.”

“How lucky am I,” Pacey grumbles, finally lifting the covers so he can see them. “Isn’t the point to do what I want today?”

Jack rolls his eyes. “Not when you want us to ignore it completely,” he teases. “Come on, birthday boy, have a little faith. Jen even bought you your favorite cake this year instead of trying to make it!”

Pacey can’t help but perk up slightly. “Is it chocolate cake with vanilla frosting?”

“No, because we’re all strangers,” Jack jokes with a dramatic roll of his eyes. “Of course it is.”

“Presents first, though,” Jen begs excitedly. “So put some real clothes on and get out there!”

Pacey groans again. “Fine, but just know that I hate all of you.”

As everyone shuffles out of his room, Pacey catches himself wishing that Adam was still here. Then again, he didn’t like the idea of Adam having to see him be so unappreciative of his friends’ birthday surprises. Every year, Pacey found a way to be miserable on his birthday. After years of his family being too hungover from New Years to ever pay him any attention, Pacey never learned how to handle an entire day being about him. But after years of mishaps and unwarranted anxiety, Jen has perfected how to handle Pacey’s big day. Even Jack had caught on in the last couple years. They did cake and small gifts, to not overwhelm him, and then Pacey escaped to have dinner with Gretchen. He was thankful that Gretchen and Jen’s traditions with Pacey had never overlapped, since he still wasn’t sure how to feel about their little tryst in New York. He pushed those thoughts aside and threw on a hoodie and sweatpants and sauntered out to the couch.

Everyone was there waiting for him, all with annoying smiles on their faces. Jen was the first to present him with a gift, her dorky smile making Pacey laugh. When he opens the gift he feigns shock.

“Wow, you knit me a hat? This is a first!” he jokes with a grin. Jen had been knitting him hats ever since Grams taught her how --- so it had been his birthday gift for the past eight years or so at this point. At first it was a genuine gift, then a replacement because Pacey had lost his first one, but then he lost his second one, then his third… So now it had become a cute little inside joke between the two, a tradition he actually looked forward to.

“I strive to surprise,” Jen plays along before wrapping him in a tight hug. She still felt bad about the night before, but she knew that they would survive anything that came their way. They had for their whole lives, really.

Jack hands over a bag filled with tissue paper. “And now me,” he gushes as he pats Pacey’s back.

Pacey opens the present to find a brand new set of Jenga blocks, and he can’t help but chuckle. “Ah, yes. Jenga,” Pacey deadpans. “How did you know?”

“A guy’s intuition,” Jack quips with a shrug. “It’s for all the parties we make you host,” he adds with a wink. “And I added little dares on some of the tiles to make it interesting.”

“Thanks, Jackers. Just another game for me to annihilate you all in,” Pacey announces, and the group all instantly get defensive.

It even gets Joey to finally pipe up. “Please. I am a Jenga _master_ ,” she brags.

Pacey finally looks in her direction and locks eyes with her. “I’ll believe it when I see it, Potter.”

Joey feels her cheeks begin to flush nervously, so she panics and just hands over a present. “Here,” she says, avoiding his eyes. “It’s from Bodie and Bessie. And Alex,” she adds with a gentle smile. “I told them in passing that your birthday was coming up, and suddenly there was an Express Mail package waiting for me to give to you.”

Pacey looks down at the colorfully wrapped package on his lap quietly. Even Jack and Jen are silent, sharing a quick look of curiosity. “They didn’t have to do this,” Pacey assures Joey before opening the package. He smiles immediately, picking up a homemade card with Alexander’s scribbly handwriting all over it. He’d even drawn a little stick figure versions of himself, Joey and Pacey.

Jack and Jen share another look, silently communicating that this gift might be nice enough to send Pacey over the edge. Audrey looks between the two of them with a furrowed brow. Pacey sets the card aside carefully and sighs to himself as he sees the nice set of cooking utensils in the package. He looks up at Joey, his voice gentle, “They really didn’t have to do this.”

“They insisted.” Joey softens at his reaction, her heart warming at the thought that Pacey --- and everyone in this loft that were now a huge part of her life --- were now also officially part of her family. “I guess they liked you, or something.” She smiles, and then takes a deep breath. She’s finally a little more put together, especially for the sake of everyone else in the room. Slowly, she takes out a small wrapped gift. “And, finally,” she says dramatically, “This is from me.” Suddenly, she forgets all the possible awkwardness or complications, and genuinely just stands there excited to see his reaction.

Pacey takes the gift hesitantly, holding her gaze for a moment too long. This was, by far, past his limit of being in the spotlight, and it was barely noon. He bites his lip as he begins opening the gift, thinking back to the beautiful drawing she’d given him for Christmas. That was enough for Christmas _and_ his Birthday for the next few years as far as he was concerned. He’d never be able to come close to how perfect that gift was and now she’d gotten him— Before his mind can run any further, he sees what it is that she got him. And he pauses.

When Jack and Jen see the red pyjama pants, covered in little puppies wearing little Santa hats, they’re instantly confused. “Oh?” Jen mumbles, unable to contain herself.

But before anyone else can say anything else, Pacey is laughing, “Oh my god, I can't believe you.”

“Well, you said you wanted a pair!” Joey defends, not being able to stop herself from laughing.

“I did say that,” Pacey accepts, stealing another glance at her. “You’re a dork. Thanks, Jo.”

She throws him a genuine smile, finally properly locking eyes for a second. “You’re welcome. Just don’t wear them on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays, ‘cause those are _my_ days. Unless you’re okay with matching.”

Pacey rolls his eyes, teasing, “Don’t worry, I won’t be going out of my way to match anytime soon.”

Before Joey can say anything else, Jen leaps up. “See, presents don’t have to be a chore!” Jen insists, patting Pacey’s arm as she walks past him to go into the kitchen. “Now it’s pancake time.”

“I’ll get the blueberries,” Jack stands up quickly to follow her.

Joey sits there a bit awkwardly, thankful that Audrey was still there. Her best friend looks between the two, noticing something is off, and remembers the night before when Joey seemed frazzled just before the countdown. Could it be that they…. _?_

Audrey looks at Pacey and has to stop herself from thinking further. Damn that boy and his stupid blackmail.

“So, uh,” Joey attempts to pipe up. “Adam slept over, hey? I gave him a cup of coffee before he left for work.” Maybe if she talked about this it would help her get over… well, everything.

Audrey’s ears practically perk up. “Wait, your date slept over?” She asks as she turns to Pacey, forgetting all about the Joey and Pacey implications secretly running off in her brain. “Wow, Witter. You sure are starting the new year --- and your birthday --- with a _bang_ , aren’t you?” She throws him a wink.

For the first time since meeting her, Pacey is happy to have Audrey here cracking her jokes. And yet, he still ignores her and turns to Joey, praying that she can’t see him blushing. “You were up that early?! I barely drank last night and I was still a monster when he tried waking me up.”

Joey nods a little uncomfortably. “I couldn’t sleep,” she tells him with a shrug.

Pacey nods too, not knowing what else to say. So he busies himself, collecting the ripped wrapping paper from around him. “Jack’s midnight kiss kept you up?” Pacey jokes, immediately regretting it. He stands up too quickly, hands full of wrapping paper, stepping over Jack’s gift to leave.

Joey looks up at him, a little sadly. Hopefully neither he nor Audrey catch onto it. “Yeah, something like that,” she almost mumbles. She clears her throat, not wanting to go any further. “By the way, Adam says Happy Birthday,” she tells him with a soft smile.

Pacey glances at Joey, pausing behind her. He opens his mouth to speak, but is interrupted by her message from Adam. He nods again, smiling gently this time, even if he feels oddly bad about it. “Oh, yeah, thanks. I should give him a call.” He retreats into his room anxiously.

Joey nods, not knowing what else to say. She finally looks over to Audrey, who’s basically forcing herself not to have her mouth open in surprise. Something _totally_ happened between them. Audrey glances between the both of them again while Pacey walks away, and she can’t stop herself. “Are you two okay?” she asks Joey, whispering so she doesn’t somehow magically bring Pacey back into the room to threaten her.

“What?” Joey is snapped back, remembering that Audrey is there. “Oh, yeah. We’re fine. He just gets weird about his birthday,” she lies, getting up. “You want some pancakes?”


	6. Valentine's Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> galentine's day cuteness and valentine's day jacey angst :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi everyoneee we took a little break after writing like two chapters back to back but we have returned!! we hope you all have a wonderful galentine's AND valentine's day :) stream love story (taylor's version) 
> 
> content warning: THIS IS IMPORTANT, we have a part that could be triggering to some towards the last bit of the chapter. it isn't explicitly written and it doesn't get far, but please read carefully, we want everyone to be safe. it happens once joey is at pacey's bar and a man sits beside her. just skip to wherever you want if you don't feel comfortable reading. again, we tried to make it as safe as possible, simply a mention of what was attempted. if you skip a couple paragraphs you can see pacey beat him up instead. PLEASE BE SAFE!
> 
> also swearing throughout.

“Why are you even throwing this stupid get together?” Pacey asks from behind the wheel of his car. Joey immediately rolls her eyes from the passenger’s seat, sure that she had answered this question already.

Her roommate had agreed to give her a lift to the store on his way to a shift at the bar; he was her last resort, and she’d only agreed because he’d heard her begging Jen and insisted that she shouldn’t waste her money on calling a Lyft. “It’s _Galentine’s Day_ , Pacey,” she answers with a frustrated sigh. “It’s practically a holiday, and it’s fun.”

She had never been one to go out of her way to spend time with other girls, but Joey’s Valentine’s Day plans were _very_ dry. She was thankfully on friendly terms with AJ, who was now dating Morgan, but she hadn’t attempted to date anyone else since. So she was actually looking forward to this girls night she had thrown together at the last minute, using it as yet another thing to focus on so she didn’t have any opportunity to think about… Well, the person currently sitting beside her.

They hadn’t talked about what happened at the New Year’s party. Or anything else, really. They had been pretty avoidant of each other since, walking on eggshells and finding excuses to not be alone in a room together. Well, at least that’s what Joey was doing. Truth be told, Pacey had simply just been busy with his new boyfriend. He and Adam became official quickly after the New Years party, and sometimes she wouldn’t see her roommate for days. This ten minute car ride was probably the most that she’d see of him all week.

And to be honest? She hated it. Joey missed Pacey so much, it sometimes made her heart hurt. There were times where Jen or Jack would say something stupid and she’d turn her head, ready to laugh and tease, only to find an empty seat. She missed having someone to bicker effortlessly with, someone who made her laugh in between making her annoyed, but most of all, she missed her friend.

Because that’s all they were and all they would ever be. Friends.

“Who are you even having over for this thing?” Pacey asks, bringing her back out of her own head.

“Jen, obviously,” she answers, looking out the window at the buildings passing by. “And Audrey.” At that, Pacey snickers, and she turns her head to narrow her eyes at him. “What?”

“Nothing. Is that it? Your roommate and your best friend?”

Joey throws him a fake smile. “No, I also invited your sister and your ex-girlfriend.”

Pacey turns away from the road to give Joey a bewildered look. “Wait. You invited Jen and Gretchen?! Have you ever hosted a party before? You do know people are supposed to enjoy themselves, right?”

“They agreed to stay friends, and if they didn’t want to come they would’ve said no. Which they didn’t.” She crosses her arms with a huff. “I know what I’m doing.”

Pacey narrows his eyes a little as he stares forward at the road. “Okay… Well, it’s a good thing you invited Andie. She’s great at diffusing awkward situations. And she’s probably thrilled to hang out with you.”

“Yeah.” Joey doesn’t really know what else to say and she hates it. She knew she was making this way harder than it needed to be, but she couldn’t help it. Being around Pacey now felt off somehow. There were too many unspoken things. “Do you think you could drive any faster? I need to have this stuff ready for lunch.”

“Actually no, I’m driving slow on purpose so I can be late for work while running this errand for you.” Pacey can’t help but feel annoyed. He keeps his eyes on the road, wondering why his back and forth with Joey was suddenly so one-sided. Nevertheless, he speeds up slightly.

At that, Joey finally looks at him. Why was _he_ moody? He had no right to be moody. _He_ was the one who leaned in first that night! She opens her mouth to retort something back, but then feels the car go a bit faster, so she closes it up again. She makes herself be silent, allowing the radio to be the only sound inside the vehicle.

They sit in silence for a bit, but as they stop at a red light Pacey feels himself itching to say something. He reminds himself that this is her first Valentine’s Day since Dawson. He was a terror last year without Andie, so Joey has every right to do the same. But for some reason, he can’t seem to keep his mouth shut. “So, what are your plans for the party?”

“Typical girl stuff,” Joey answers easily. “Facemasks, wine, crying, probably.” She can’t help the smile that sneaks onto her face. “Why? You wanna join?” Despite the awkwardness, Joey would never miss an opportunity to tease him.

Pacey smiles to himself, not daring to steal a glance at her. “Oh, trust me, this is one party I’d never crash.” He wants to point out that her guest list consists of a love triangle in the making and his ex-girlfriend. It sounds like a nightmare to Pacey, but instead, he settles on being straightforward. “But don’t worry, I’ve got dinner plans with Adam after work so I’ll be out of your hair.”

Joey feels her face literally fall at the explanation for Pacey’s absence in the evening. It wasn’t surprising at this point, but it was still something she couldn’t seem to get used to. “Well, your loss, then. I’ll try to save a facemask for you.”

“Thanks,” Pacey smiles, drumming his hands on the steering wheel awkwardly as he parks his car. He wasn’t sure why things felt so tense with Joey lately, but he couldn’t help but think back to New Year’s Eve. That’s the night everything went to shit in the loft. Between the Jen and Gretchen bombshell and Joey leaning in to kiss him, he still couldn’t wrap his head around it. Even worse was that he leaned in, too. Thank god Jack had interrupted them or who knows how much _more_ awkward things would be. “Good luck with the party.”

Joey unbuckles her seatbelt and grabs her things. “Thanks for the ride,” she says as she throws him a small smile and steps out of the car.

She watches him drive away and has to force herself to cheer up before walking into the store.

* * *

Somehow Jack found out where Joey was and offered to drive her back home. “Thanks for doing this, Jackers,” Joey says with a smile as she steps into his car.

Jack is so used to the nickname by now, he doesn’t even grimace anymore. “Of course. You were on my way home, so it’s no big deal.”

“From where?”

“Tobey and I were doing some before school tutoring,” Jack replies easily as he starts the car. “What did you end up getting?”

Joey shoves her things into the backseat and puts on her seatbelt. “Just some cheap face masks and snacks. The works.”

“You know, Andie is actually so excited about tonight. Thank you for inviting her, Jo.”

Joey smiles. “Of course. I’m excited, too.” She turns to look at her friend, “What I’m really worried about is Jen and Gretchen. Do you think it was too soon for me to make them both be in the same room together?”

He turns to glimpse at her before turning back to the road with a sigh. “I mean, I think they’re okay. That’s what Jen keeps telling me, anyway.”

“But is she really?”

“I don’t know, Jo. She’s been obsessed with Gretch for most of her life, so this was all probably a lot for her to process. But from what I hear they’re trying to be friends, so maybe tonight will help.”

“I hope so,” Joey mutters sadly. “I just want tonight to be fun.”

Jack takes one hand off the steering wheel to grip her thigh supportively. “I’m sure it will be,” he assures her with a smile. Then, after a good pause, he changes the subject for both their sakes. “So, you really don’t have any Valentine’s plans for tomorrow?” he questions with a raised brow.

“Not you, too,” the girl groans dramatically, staring out the car window. “This is my first Valentine’s Day as a single woman in five years. I can’t just cannonball into the water! It’s scary out there.”

“Aw, Jo,” Jack says with a chuckle. “That’s exactly why you _should_ cannonball.”

“Nope,” she stubbornly replies. “Tonight should be enough. Plus, Valentine’s is just a stupid holiday made up to sell chocolates and cheesy teddy bears. I think I’ll be fine.”

“Aren’t you just filled up to the brim with Cupid’s spirit?” her roommate teases with a laugh. “I’ll spend the day with you tomorrow if you want. I had plans, but I can cancel them.”

“What? Oh god, Jack, you’re so sweet, but you really don’t have to do that for me,” Joey is quick to reply. “I’m sure I can make it through. And today will hopefully lift my spirits and last me a few days.”

“Damn, girl bonding is _that_ powerful?”

“You have no idea,” she jokes with a wink.

* * *

“It’s not too late for you to fake an illness and bail, Jen,” Joey half-jokes as her roommate helps her get the living room prepared.

Jen chuckles as she sets down a bowl full of gummy bears. “That’s sweet of you, Jo. But I promise I’ll be fine. As weird as it could be, Gretchen and I need this if we want to stick to our word and move past everything.”

To be honest, Joey was kind of in awe of Jen for handling this whole thing so… maturely. Or at least that was the front she was using. Who knows what could actually be going on in her pretty blonde head. Still, Joey chooses to trust her. “Alright. But if you ever need an out, just tug your left ear and I’ll cover you.”

The blonde can’t help but smile, before she goes over to lay a kiss on Joey’s head. “Thanks, babe.”

“Anytime.” Joey finishes pouring out the chips and goes to get wine glasses to leave out.

“Also…” Jen sighs, and Joey turns around to face her with furrowed brows. She’d grown to know when Jen was about to be serious, and this was her telltale sign. Joey tenses a bit. “I’ve been meaning to ask you,” the blonde continues cautiously. “Are things okay between you and Pacey? Did something happen?”

She should have seen this coming. Joey swallows hard, always having to push down her instinct to run away at the mention of his name. “No,” she lies, eyes down to focus on her task. “Why would you say that?”

“I don’t know. You guys have been acting off around each other,” Jen says, and Joey winces a little, ashamed that she wasn’t as good of an actress as she’d hoped she’d be. “When you’re around each other at all, that is.”

“We’re fine,” she reassures again, shrugging.

Jen knows she’s lying. Joey finally gives in and looks up to see her roommate’s eyes softly staring back. “Jo, it’s okay.”

Joey nods, though she’s not sure why.

“I’m just here if you need me. That’s all.” Jen gently puts her hand over hers, and Joey can’t help but smile softly.

“Thank you,” she whispers, and Jen nods, like it’s the simplest answer she has ever given. Like it never will be a chore to be needed. And Joey believes it wholeheartedly. “I love you, you know that?”

“You’re just saying that because it’s Galentine’s Day,” Jen teases, and Joey laughs despite herself. “But I love you, too, Jo.” They hug tightly, and Joey is thankful for the billionth time this year that she moved into this flat. “Anyways,” Jen says when they pull away. “Enough talk of men. Let’s pour that wine.”

* * *

Everyone arrived mostly on time, with Audrey obviously being the first to trickle in. Andie was next, eager with childlike excitement that Joey actually found heartwarming. Gretchen is the last to waltz in, with her calm and collected demeanor that Joey will always envy. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees how Jen sucks in a deep breath at the sight of the Witter girl, so she makes sure to throw her a supportive smile from across the room. Jen smiles back, nodding gratefully.

They all sit around the kitchen and pass snacks, chatting casually with each other to start the night off. Wine has been poured but no one is drinking too much yet, easing into the evening together.

Suddenly, Joey hears the door of Jack’s room open, and everyone turns around to look at him enter the room.

“I just walked into my worst gay nightmare,” Jack jokes to a few chuckles. “Don’t mind me, I’m on my way out. Wouldn’t wanna ruin your night with my testosterone.”

“Where’re you off to?” Andie asks like the sister she is.

“Yeah, you don’t _have_ to go,” Jen pipes in. “We have extra facemasks and _plenty_ of alcohol.”

Jack actually stands there to contemplate for a second, and Joey can’t tell if he’s genuine or just doing it for a bit, but it makes her smile nevertheless. “I hate that that sounded tempting,” he confesses with a chuckle. “Save me what you can.”

“Will do,” Jen nods with a grin.

“I’ll be at Tobey’s,” Jack answers, looking at Andie. “Can I be back by 2am or are you girls gonna be rowdy till the sun’s up?”

“You never know,” Audrey replies with a wink, which Jack uses as his cue to go.

“Bye, Jackers!” Everyone yells as he waves them off.

The conversations trickle off, so they all decide it was time to crowd into their bathroom to help each other put on the cheap face masks Joey bought earlier. There’s laughter and cheesy pop music echoing together, and she hasn’t felt this happy in a long time. They dance around like teenagers on their first sleepover, definitely tipsy, yelling the lyrics to classics like _I Wanna Dance With Somebody_ or _You Belong With Me_ (because what is a girls night without Taylor Swift?)

They’re all breathless by the time they walk back out into the living room, pouring more wine into their glasses and sitting on the couch with satisfied sighs.

Andie takes a sip of her drink and then throws everyone a smile. "So, what hot goss do you guys wanna talk about?”

“Oooh, let’s go around and talk about our worst Valentine’s Day,” Audrey offers excitedly.

Everyone stays quiet, so Joey takes the lead. “I’ll go first,” she offers. “On our fourth year together, I planned this whole big thing for Dawson. I rented his favorite movies, I had all these snacks, and I even bought this gorgeous dress to wear out for dinner. I had everything booked and set up, and then he called me ten minutes before we were supposed to meet up and told me he “forgot” he made plans with some guys in the crew for the shitty school movie he was working on.” She wants to rage at the memory, but she downs another sip of her drink to regain composure. “Anyways, he didn't even come home until the morning after, totally hungover because they had dragged him to a bar. He didn’t get me a gift or anything, either. Just said he would make it up to me the next year, which is… Well, tomorrow.” She chuckles humorlessly.

“God, _fuck_ that guy,” Audrey instantly says, putting her arm supportively around Joey’s shoulder. The blonde toasts her drink. “To Joey escaping that sick son of a bitch,” she cheers.

All the other girls laugh triumphantly as they cheer, and Joey even smiles as she follows along.

“Okay, I can go,” Jen says once she swallows her drink. “I think it was two years ago now, but I had this date planned for Valentine’s day with this super cute girl I met at a coffee shop. Or, at least, that’s what I thought. We had lunch together and I gave her some candies and everything, and then when I’m about to ask her to come back to my place, she says she has plans with her _boyfriend_.” Andie laughs, and Jen shakes her head with a smile.

“You couldn’t tell she wasn’t gay?” Joey asks with furrowed brows. Usually her roommate had an incredible gaydar.

“Oh, I slept with her a year later,” Jen answers with a shrug, and everyone laughs --- even Gretchen. “So I wasn’t totally off. But it was still super embarrassing in the moment.”

Andie lifts her glass. “To Jen’s… lesbianism?”

Everyone laughs, but Jen nods. “Nope, that’s right. Cheers to that indeed.” They all toast in fits of giggles.

“Alright, Gretchen, your turn,” Andie pleads.

Gretchen sighs. “Alright, I’ve been with a handful of tools in my ripe old age,” she jokes. “But, um, there was one time where I had to babysit Pacey while out on a Valentine’s date.”

“What?” Audrey sits up a little. “Do tell.”

Gretchen chuckles. “Well, he got grounded the week before, and mom and dad put me on babysitting duty. I couldn’t get out of it, even though I tried like _hell_ , so I ended up having to take him with me to my date. It _sucked_. Please don’t ask Pacey about it, he was ready to throw himself out of my car window.”

“Wait, you had to take him _to_ the date?” Joey asks, interested despite herself.

“Yep. And the movie theatre we went to was full, so he was forced to sit beside us throughout a whole awful rom com.”

“Why didn’t you guys just leave him somewhere and pick him up after? God, Gretch, you’re a sadist,” Audrey teases.

“I would, but Dad installed a tracker on his phone as a precaution because he knew Pacey would try to run off to Jen’s house.”

Jen smiles. “Didn’t stop him from texting me how much he hated every second of that night, though.”

“How do you think _I_ felt?” Gretchen protests. “I was supposed to get laid that night!”

“Oh, Gretch,” Andie winces with a laugh.

“To Pacey’s incredible cock blocking abilities,” Jen cheers, and they all know what to do.

“Alright, I have one that beats _all_ of yours,” Audrey announces, changing her position in her seat to properly command her audience. “This was like four years ago, but I snuck into this super fancy club in downtown LA for Valentine’s because I had nothing better to do. I was meeting a bunch of these Hollywood people, and I ended up getting super wasted, so I flirted with a whole bunch of them. I ended up going home with this dude who claimed he was in a new movie with Leonardo DiCaprio and he could get me to meet him.”

“Oh my god, I _love_ DiCaprio,” Andie gushes cutely. “He is _so_ handsome.”

“Duh, you have eyes,” Audrey replies and they both chuckle. She continues, “Unfortunately, the guy ended up being a big fat liar. He was just some dumb assistant to a producer and the most famous person he ever talked to was, like, Margo Martindale.”

“Boo!” The girls all scream in unison, definitely tipsy now.

“That’s not even the worst part,” Audrey adds, and everyone shuts up to hear her. “I looked through my phone the next morning, and I had pictures of _Joe Jonas_ kissing my neck.”

“No. Way.” Joey gasps out. “You’re lying.”

“Nope,” Audrey replies, pulling her phone out. “I could’ve hooked up with Joe Jonas that night but I was too drunk and picked the wrong guy. I’m 100% serious.” She turns her phone around with the picture proof. It’s blurry, probably due to Audrey’s drunkenness, but it was recognizably the Jonas Brother she claimed.

“Holy shit!” Jen says as she reaches for the phone to get a better look, with Andie and Joey look over her shoulders. “I know I’m a lesbian, but I would absolutely do him.” She lays an apologetic hand on Audrey’s thigh. “I am _so_ sorry.”

Gretchen finally looks at the picture and chuckles. “When Pacey finds out about this, he’s gonna freak.”

“Oh my god,” Andie says through a laugh. “I totally forgot about that. Joe was actually in his celebrity pass list between us.”

“Wait, I can piss Pacey off with this?” Audrey asks with a smirk. “Not a total loss after all, then.”

Jen laughs, handing the phone back as she stands up from her seat. “We need to take an apologetic shot for you,” she says as she grabs a vodka bottle from the kitchen. She fills their shot glasses, stolen from Pacey’s bar like most of their glasses, and hands them out with a grin. “To Joe Jonas, who will sadly never know the thrill of sleeping with Audrey Liddell.”

Audrey laughs, blowing Jen a kiss before tilting her head back for the shot with the rest of them. Joey and Andie grimace at the taste, coincidentally locking eyes as they do it. It makes both of them giggle.

“Andie, you’re the last one,” Jen points out. “Though I’ll doubt you’ll beat standing up a Jonas Brother.”

Andie smiles before shaking her head. “Well, tomorrow is my first Valentine’s day with Will, so I have nothing there yet. And with Pacey…” Joey sips her drink as Andie sighs while sorting through her memories. “Oh, there was one year where everything he planned kept going wrong,” she recalls with a chuckle. “We went out on this picnic at the park, and when we got there he had these chocolate covered strawberries that melted everywhere. Then when he showed them to me, I laughed so hard I spilled my champagne all over his pants.” Jen smiles sweetly, and so does Gretchen. Audrey throws a knowing look at Joey, but her best friend is suddenly very interested in her drink. Andie continues, “And to top it all off, I bought tickets to this rom-com, but when we got there we found out I somehow bought them for the wrong day. So we went and watched this shitty horror movie because it was the only one available.”

“Yep, sounds like your typical Pacey adventure,” Gretchen agrees.

“But the thing is, I don’t think it was awful at all. Pacey kept getting frustrated, but I thought it was all still so charming and fun,” Andie shrugs.

“I think you misunderstood the game, Andie,” Audrey teases.

“Lucky her,” Joey pipes up, finally snapping herself back. She raises her cup. “To Andie not having a shitty Valentine’s story.”

All the girls hesitate for a moment, but then follow her lead.

“I think this is a good segway into the next question I had planned,” Joey says with a grin.

“Of course you planned questions,” Jen teases with a friendly eye roll.

Joey ignores her, crossing her legs under her to get more comfortable. “What do you guys want in your dream partner?” She throws a look at Andie. “You can be exempt from this if you want.”

“No, I wanna play!” the blonde is quick to protest. “I’d say my top three wants are… Someone supportive, kind, and family oriented.”

“And you got all of that in your current hunk?” Audrey pokes, because of course she would.

Andie doesn’t have to think about it. “Oh, absolutely. I wouldn’t be with him if I didn’t.”

“Well, I just want someone hot,” Audrey says with a shrug, and everyone laughs even though they totally should have expected this. “I want a ripped bod, a nice ass, a huge d--”

“Oh, come on!” Joey yelps, hand covering her face.

“What?” Audrey asks defensively. “It’s true.” The laughter dies down a bit and Audrey actually softens up a bit. “Girls are a different story.”

Jen practically jumps. “You’re into girls?!”

“Yep,” Audrey answers simply, avoiding Jen’s eyes so slightly, which only Joey probably notices. “I like playing all fields, what can I say?”

“Hell fucking yeah!” Jen celebrates, holding her hand up for a high five, which Audrey gives with a shake of her head. “I can’t believe you and Joey never told me, given that you practically live here.”

“It’s never come up,” Audrey defends herself, shrugging.

“We are _so_ picking up girls together next time we go out.” Jen hasn’t grinned this wide in a while.

“Name the date,” Audrey agrees, smiling softly. Joey can’t help but narrow her eyes slightly at the sight. There was something here she couldn’t quite pick up on yet, but she knew it existed. She knew Audrey better than anybody. “Alright, your turn,” the blonde tells Jen.

“Oh, god,” Jen says, suddenly stiffening a bit. She sneaks a glance at Gretchen, who just gives her a smile. She sighs, thinking about what the right thing to say would be. She doesn’t know if such a thing exists. She’s known what she’s wanted for years --- It was right in front of her, and she couldn’t have it. Her shot was starting to get to her head, and she feared what she would say with that present. So instead, she cops out. “I just want someone who wants me,” she says with a shrug. Then, to soften the mood, she adds, “Oh, and corny love letters. I don’t care how cliché it is, I want them.”

“Who wouldn’t?” Andie agrees with a smile, and Joey remembers how Pacey told her Andie is great at diffusing any possible disaster. He was right.

“What about _you_ , Jo?” Jen asks with a slight shove, knowingly glancing at her roommate.

Joey thinks it over, ramming her drunk brain for the proper words. “Well, first off, as long as they’re not Dawson Leery, that’s a great start.” That gets a few laughs, which makes her smile. “Um, I don’t know, honestly.”

“Oh, come on, you have to have thought about this,” Andie pries.

“Yeah, c’mon,” Jen agrees. “Why didn’t it work with that AJ guy?”

Joey’s surprised by the question, and shrugs lamely in response. “We just didn’t click the way I wanted to.”

“Why not?” Gretchen interrogates, not being able to help herself from joining in.

“Probably ‘cause he was super boring,” Audrey mumbles into her glass, but Joey hears and dramatically opens her mouth in shock.

“He wasn’t that bad!” she defends, and Audrey raises her eyebrows, unconvinced. Joey sighs. “But I guess you’re somewhat right. I just wanted _more_ , you know?” She’s too intoxicated to stop herself from being honest. “I just want passion. Even if it’s harder and hurts more.”

“You’re saying Dawson _wasn’t_ passionate?” Audrey teases, and Joey genuinely laughs.

“You totally avoided the question, though,” Gretchen points out after another sip. “I mean, I guess a person can be passionate, but you need more than that.”

Joey huffs. “Fine. Then I guess I’ll also say I want… Someone funny would be nice, who I can joke around with easily. And someone loving, you know? A guy who’s there for me when I need him — but not someone who’s too scared to call me out and be upfront with me, either. Oh, and obviously someone who’s good with my family.” She finally stops to take a breath, not realizing she had all of that hidden somewhere inside her already.

She looks up to find all of her friends looking at her with raised brows, and Andie snickers before covering her mouth. Joey instantly panics, wondering if she said something she shouldn’t have.

Gretchen smirks at her. “Joey, that’s literally P—-”

“Perfect,” Jen cuts her off, throwing Gretchen a look. “That sounds like the perfect guy for you, Jo.”

Joey narrows her eyes at her roommate, suddenly curious about what she was missing out on. But then she quickly feels very overwhelmed with everyone’s knowing eyes at her, so she gets up from her seat. “Does anyone else want a refill?” she asks the room, desperate for an excuse to regain her composure.

Audrey and Andie pass her their glasses, taking her offer, and Joey can’t rush out of that living room fast enough.

As soon as she’s out of earshot, Audrey leans in to whisper to the group. “So we all agree that she just described Pacey, right?”

* * *

“Honey, he is _not_ your soulmate! You’ve known him for a week!” Jen yells at the TV and the other girls agree loudly, drunkenly nodding.

They had somehow ended up watching a random episode of Love Island, and were now all judging the contestants as if they could hear their complaints from the other side of the screen.

“You’re telling me that _this_ is the garbage Jack makes Pacey watch?” Gretchen asks, brow furrowed deeply.

“Jack doesn’t _make_ Pacey do anything, he loves this show!” Jen laughs, “Right, Andie?”

“Yeah, Jack got him into it back when we were still dating. I think liking this show may just be his biggest flaw,” Andie grins, eyes on the screen, “But, it’s definitely... entertaining.”

“That’s just your way of saying everyone is super hot,” Audrey teases lightly, taking another sip of her drink, “And I like where your head's at.”

Now Andie puts on a goofy British accent, “Can I pull ya for a chat, my head won’t be turned.”

They erupt into laughter at Andie’s butchering of the accent. “What does any of that even mean?” Joey asks with a shake of her head.

“If you’re hot you don’t need to make sense,” Audrey answers. “Trust me, I’d know,” she adds with a wink.

As the show’s ending credits finally roll, Gretchen finishes her cup of water and stands up from her place on the couch. “Alright, I love you guys, but I should get home.” She hadn’t told anyone, but she had a tentative date tomorrow, and she didn’t want to be hungover and exhausted for it. Especially since it was the first person she was seeing since what happened with Jen over Christmas. Before anyone can question her leaving, she adds, genuinely, “This was surprisingly fun, though.”

Joey’s intoxicated brain doesn’t even take the opportunity to act offended at Gretchen’s surprise at her planning something exciting. Instead, she reaches out for her hand. “We’re not gonna let you drive drunk, Gretch!”

The Witter girl laughs, and she’s about to open her mouth to reply when Jen beats her to it. “She hasn’t been drinking anything but water for the past two hours,” the blonde notes easily.

Gretchen is a bit taken aback at how Jen knew that. She had thought they were all too drunk to catch on to her plan, but apparently she couldn’t get past Jen Lindley. She should have known. She clears her throat before nodding. “Yeah, Jen’s right. So I’ll be fine, Joey, but thank you for your concern.”

Jen locks eyes with Gretchen for a moment, but then is suddenly overwhelmed at the knowledge that her forever crush is totally sober while she’s heavily intoxicated. The odds weren’t fair, nor were they in her favor. She wanted nothing more than to pull Gretchen aside and actually talk about things, convince her to pick them and their potential, and then absolutely kiss her senseless. Instead, Jen sips her wine.

Thankfully, Andie breaks the silence, standing up a little wobbly. “Gretchen… Lovely, beautiful, kind, _responsible_ Gretchen… Could you _please_ drive me home?” Gretchen snickers before nodding her head, and Andie hugs her in response. “Thank you so much,” the blonde says. “I didn’t wanna ruin girl’s night by having _Will_ pick me up.”

“Ugh, I forgot you’re going home to a man,” Audrey whines dramatically. “ _And_ that he’s gonna take you out and treat you well tomorrow. Joey, we’ve had an imposter in our midst this whole time.”

Andie sticks her tongue out childishly, and Joey and Jen giggle drunkenly at the sight. “You know what, Audrey, you’re right,” Jen agrees, glad to be taken out of her Gretchen filled thoughts. “Out with you, traitor!” She throws a leftover piece of popcorn at Andie, but the girl simply catches it and eats it triumphantly.

“Alright, and with that, we’re off,” Gretchen says, pushing Andie towards their coats.

“Wait!” Joey practically screams, flying up from the couch way too quickly and almost falling back down, but luckily Audrey catches her. Joey gets herself together and then motions for Jen and Audrey to follow her lead. “We need a group hug to end the night,” she practically pouts.

“Oh, right,” Jen says with a giggle. “I always forget how _mushy_ drunk Joey is.”

All of them hug, drunken laughter filling the loft. “I love you girls,” Joey says first, and then it’s echoed about four more times in response. She feels warm and fuzzy and content, and she knows it’s not just because of the alcohol.

Gretchen and Andie wave goodbye, and Jen closes the door behind them.

“I’m _so_ happy that went well,” Joey gushes, throwing her arms over her two blonde best friends before they can protest. “I love you two. So much. Thank you.” She hugs them both tightly, their cheeks squishing against hers, before finally letting go. “You know, you two have a lot in common. It makes sense that you’re both so great.”

“God, Jo, stop being so cute and nice. I’m gonna puke,” Audrey teases.

Joey rolls her eyes. “I was gonna offer for you to sleep in my bed with me, but for that, you can stay on the couch.”

“Fine with me. I’ve slept on it enough, I know all the best positions by now.”

“That’s what she said,” Jen blurts out and then looks at her friends apologetically. To her surprise, Audrey breaks out into laughter, and Joey and Jen are giggling soon after.

“Good one, Jen,” Audrey says, locking eyes with her fellow blonde and smiling sweetly.

Now, Joey is drunk, but she’s not _that_ drunk. She can’t stop from raising her eyebrows at the sight, never having seen Audrey look so genuinely at another person. But then her best friend catches her staring, and Joey wonders if she really saw anything at all.

“Well,” Joey announces. “I’m gonna go pass out. Goodnight!”

“Love you, Jo,” her two friends call back as she walks into her room and closes her door.

In the hallway, Jen and Audrey share a smile before Jen takes the lead. “Are you sure you’re okay on the couch?”

“What, are you offering something better?” Audrey can’t help but tease. She expects Jen to simply roll her eyes and wish her goodnight, but instead, Audrey is pleasantly surprised.

“Well, I have a queen’s size mattress,” Jen offers. “I’m sure we could both fit.”

Audrey’s eyebrows shoot up, not believing her ears. Surely, Jen must just be drunk. Audrey had slept over countless times before, and she’d never gotten this offer. To be fair, most of the time it was because she passed out on the couch before anyone got the chance to, but still. “Woah, Lindley. If you wanted to sleep with me, you could’ve just asked.” That gets the eyeroll Audrey was expecting, and she smiles triumphantly. “I know you just wanna one up Joe Jonas on something.”

“Well, maybe I do,” Jen jokes along. “Now that I know you like girls, it’s a very real possibility.” Audrey can’t help but feel like she’s just been punched in the gut at the knowledge that Jen is definitely just joking. She absent mindedly follows Jen back to the couch, and the two girls sit down. “I just don’t want tonight to be over just yet,” Jen admits.

Audrey nods. The alcohol in her system was still in full swing, and though she was panicked over being alone with Jen right now, it did help her hide the real reason behind her flushed cheeks. “Don’t have any plans tomorrow, I’m assuming?” She asks, keeping her cool for now.

“Nope. I’ve barely processed another girl ever since all that stuff with Gretchen happened.”

“Ah. Right.” Audrey purses her lips, daring to look up and meet Jen’s eyes. She hadn’t stopped thinking about kissing her ever since she got the chance to do it for New Years, but nothing had happened with them since. Audrey didn’t know if anything ever would, since she found out the next day from Joey that Jen and Pacey’s sister had a history --- _and_ had finally slept together over Christmas. Talk about awful timing on her part. She’d never been lucky in the love department, so she shouldn’t be surprised, and usually she was great about moving on, but... there was something she was deeply attracted to about Jen.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to depress you,” Jen says, and Audrey realizes she got so lost in her thoughts she had forgotten to speak.

“Oh, no, you’re fine!” She assures the other girl, trying not to blush. “I was just… thinking about how I don’t have any plans tomorrow either.” Audrey looks up to see if her clues will ever be picked up.

Jen doesn’t take the bait. “That’s so stupid,” she says instead. “I mean, we are two gorgeous, intelligent, funny, interesting, lovely girls, and we should have dates for Valentine’s Day.”

“You’re being too modest including _intelligent_ and me in the same sentence, but I appreciate the nice words,” Audrey jokes easily, and Jen slaps her arm teasingly with a shake of her head.

“Audrey, you’re wonderful, come on,” Jen assures her, and Audrey can’t help but notice how she had scooted closer. Their thighs were touching now.

“Am I?” Audrey attempts to tease, but it comes out more like a whisper.

“Yeah, I mean, you’re fun, and you’re incredibly pretty, and you’re kind of a badass,” Jen continues, and Audrey’s breath catches in her throat. “Anyone would be lucky to have you.”

 _Ah. Just not you, I guess._ Audrey clears her throat and forces herself to back away a bit. “Right. Well, same goes for you, Lindley.”

“Oh, _please_ fuel my ego,” Jen begs, and the two of them laugh. “I need it lately.”

“You don’t want me to do that. I could go on for hours.”

Jen makes herself comfortable on the couch before looking up expectedly at the other blonde.

“Alright, then,” Audrey gives in. “Well, you’re great with everyone, you’ve got a great smile, you light up every room you walk into… Oh, and you take no shit from anyone, which I love.”

“You really think that?”

“Oh, absolutely. You’re the best person Joey has brought into my life.”

Jen is flattered, and there’s a little blush on her cheeks now. “That might be one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me.”

“It shouldn’t be.”

Maybe it’s the alcohol that pushes her over the edge, but the moment just felt right. Something about finding out Audrey wasn’t straight made something click in Jen’s head, and before she can convince herself not to, Jen leans forward to kiss the other girl without a second thought. Audrey’s in shock for the first few seconds before fully grasping what’s happening, and doesn’t waste another moment before kissing her back.

The rest of the night kind of slips away from them after that.

* * *

The morning of Valentine’s day, Joey is glad that she drank enough the night before to justify staying in bed way past the morning hours. At least, that’s what she had hoped she would do, until a frazzled Jen opened her door and practically fell onto her bed, making her head pound.

“God, Jen!” Joey protests, her hands flying to her temples in a desperate attempt to keep her brain from cracking. “A knock would have been nice.”

“Jo, I fucked up,” Jen mumbles into her sheets, and Joey just hears gibberish.

“What?”

Jen brings her head up, finally making eye contact with her roommate. “I fucked up. You need to help me. And you need to promise not to yell at me.”

Joey can’t help but narrow her eyes accusingly. She’d never seen Jen act like this around her, so she knew a storm was coming. But what could she _really_ have done in the past 8 hours? She hadn’t left the loft, for all Joey knew. “What did you do?”

The blonde opens her mouth to answer, but just then she’s interrupted by Joey’s bedroom door swinging open once again. “Joey, we need to talk ---” Audrey stops in her tracks once she notices that Jen is already in there. “Wait, did you already ---?”

“No!” Jen quickly cuts her off, and Joey’s gaze flies from one blonde to the other.

“Did you two do something?” she questions with narrowed eyes.

Audrey looks embarrassed and Jen looks terrified, so she knows the answer is _yes_. “Okay, one of you spill. Now,” Joey orders, straightening herself up. Audrey and Jen share a look, and she’s a bit surprised that they even know each other well enough in order to wordlessly communicate like that.

Finally, Audrey sighs. “Jen and I slept together last night,” she admits.

Joey’s mouth practically hangs open. She looks between her best friend and her roommate, wondering if this was just an elaborate prank. But then again, when she really thought about it, it wasn’t _that_ surprising. Apparently she was picking up clues last night after all. “Um…” She’s not quite sure what they want from her here. Her blessing? Joey lets out a long exhale before shrugging. “Okay.” She throws them her best smile. “Why did _I_ have to know about this?”

Jen furrows her brows. “Because you’re our mutual friend! And I already screwed things up by getting involved with Gretchen before, and I wasn’t gonna do it again.”

“Ah,” Joey nods, “That’s sweet. I mean, sure, Audrey _is_ like my sister, but I trust you two are adults who can handle your own problems. And sexual tension.”

“Wait, really?”

“Yes, Jen,” Joey assures with a friendly roll of her eyes. “Though maybe it would do you some good to explore _beyond_ people we all know and see regularly,” she teases, and Jen blushes slightly.

“Well, good for us, then!” Audrey exclaims, taking a seat between them. “Who says girls are complicated?”

Joey laughs. “I don’t think _this_ was the hard part, Audrey,” she warns. “I’m gonna give you two a few minutes alone. I need coffee and an Advil, stat.” She throws them a smirk as she gets out of her bed, and before either of them can really protest, Joey has closed the door behind them and trapped them inside.

“So…” Audrey is the first to bite. “I guess we should talk about it, hey?”

Jen sighs, grabbing one of Joey’s pillows to hug tight across her chest. “Look, Audrey, you’re amazing. I didn’t even know you were bi ---”

“Pan,” Audrey corrects her with a smile.

Jen grins easily. “ _Pan_ , until last night. I don’t know what any of it meant, to be honest. But what I do know is that I had fun. You are… Well, I lack the words, honestly.”

Audrey simply gloats. “You are not the first to say so, but I thank you anyways.”

“Aw, damn,” Jen says with a laugh. “Here I thought that I was being clever.”

A moment of comfortable silence passes between the two of them before Audrey speaks up again. “I just, um… I mean it’s not a big deal, but I think I just need to know if you’re still into Gretchen.”

Jen is caught off guard, and she clears her throat awkwardly. “Things with Gretchen and I are… complicated. And I really am sorry, because the last thing I want is for you to get caught up in all of it, so if you just wanna pretend we never happened ---”

“Do you wanna be casual, then?” Audrey interrupts her.

“What?” Jen blinks, processing her question. “You mean, like… Have casual sex?”

“Yeah.” It’s clear that this isn’t the first time that Audrey has had this conversation. “I mean, I like you. But if you’re not ready for anything serious, I’d be okay with that.”

Jen takes a minute to consider it. She hadn’t had a casual relationship with anyone in years, definitely not since she left New York. She’d had one night stands and hookups, for sure, but she didn’t know if it was such a good idea to be casual with someone who was constantly over, and who was super close to one of her roommates. “I don’t know,” she admits.

“Well, if you change your mind, let me know,” Audrey answers with a wink, patting Jen’s hand before she gets up. “Because I definitely wouldn’t mind doing that _thing_ again.”

“Oh god,” Jen mutters, her face flushing at the memory. Audrey chuckles along, and the two of them share one last smile before she finally walks out the door.

* * *

“You slept with _who?!_ ” Jack exclaims.

Jen had been feeling pretty good ever since her talk with Audrey, who left soon after. Her reaction -- and Joey’s -- was something Jen wasn’t expecting, but it took such a big load off her chest, especially when she compared it to what happened with Gretchen. She was so relieved, she didn’t see a single downside to just getting it all out in the open and telling her other two roommates.

Too bad they didn’t seem as chill about it.

“What?” Jen asks innocently. “Audrey was great about it!” She turns to look pleadingly at Joey, who’s sitting in one of the stools in the kitchen. “And Joey was fine with it!”

Joey shakes her head. “Nope. I was already dragged into this and I’ve said my piece, Jen. Please let me finish my coffee.”

“Why am I even hearing about this?” Pacey groans, still in his pajamas while he eats his cereal. “I told you, I don’t want to know.”

“I want to hear all about it,” Jack insists, crossing his arms. Before Jen can even thank him, he adds, “It’s easier to judge you when I have the whole picture.”

“Ugh! What is so wrong about two consenting adults keeping each other company?!” Jen groans.

“Well, first it was Pacey’s sister and now Joey’s best friend,” Jack recounts, furrowing his brow slightly. “Oh god, Andie’s next, isn’t she?”

Pacey can’t contain his laughter. “Don’t worry, Jackers. No one is more loyal than Andie McPhee in a relationship, and not even Jen’s new slutty phase can change that.”

“Hey!” the blonde retorts, smacking Pacey on the arm lightly.

“Don’t worry, Jack is still a bigger slut than you. But Jack is kind enough to reserve his one night stands to those _outside_ of our very small social circle,” Pacey teases before standing up to put his bowl in the sink.

Jack simply furrows his brows with a scoff. “I’ll have you know that I’m on month two of a serious relationship, thank you very much. My slut days are behind me for now.”

“What?!” Jen practically yelps, while Pacey enters the living room looking frazzled.

Joey’s left her seat in the kitchen to join them now. “Wait, since _when_?”

“Two months ago. I just said that.” Jack shrugs, and Joey rolls her eyes as she takes a seat beside him.

“How do none of us know? And who is it?!” Jen interrogates, scooting closer to him on his other side.

“Tobey,” Jack explains, and all three of them gasp. He rolls his eyes before adding, “And none of you know because you’ve been so busy with your middle school drama. He’s been a nice distraction.”

“Your tutoring partner?” Joey recalls, everything suddenly clicking. “Oh my god, I can’t believe that flew over our heads.”

“I’ve literally been sleeping over at his place at least once a week.”

Pacey glances at Jen, silently wondering if he was the only one who hadn’t even noticed. “How could you not tell us you’re dating Hot Tobey? We overshare in this loft, that’s what we do.”

“For starters, you call him Hot Tobey,” Jack retorts.

“Not to stray from the matter at hand here, but why is _Jack_ allowed to overshare but not me?” Jen asks, hoping for more sympathy now that they were ganging up on Jack.

“Because Hot Tobey isn’t related to me,” Pacey deadpans, patting Jen’s arm on his way to the armchair.

“That’s no fair, Jack’s only option in your family is Doug. Meanwhile you have two hot sisters!” Jen attempts to defend herself, but Pacey shoves her gently.

Jack scrunches his nose up at the thought of dating Doug, changing the topic quickly. “If it makes you feel better, Jen, Pacey lost certain oversharing privileges too. Once you break the unspoken _No Siblings_ rule, there’s no turning back.” Jack explains, turning to Joey, “Me and you are the only ones with full benefits when it comes to oversharing.”

Joey smiles, but then her eyes catch Pacey’s from across the room. She can’t help but wonder if there’s also an unspoken _No Dating Within The Loft_ policy she doesn’t know about.

As if on cue, there’s a knock on the door, and Pacey stands up quickly. “Subject change,” he orders as he runs a hand through his messy hair and grabs the door. It’s Adam, holding a bouquet of flowers and smiling brightly.

“Happy Valentine’s Day,” his boyfriend announces sweetly.

“Happy Valentine’s Day.” Pacey kisses him with a grin, trying his best not to roll his eyes at the flowers.

“Ugh, couples,” Joey mutters from the couch, and Jen snickers. “Boo. Hiss.”

“Hello to you too, Joey,” Adam calls over Pacey’s shoulder with an awkward laugh. Joey blushes slightly, smiling back at him innocently.

“Yet another reason I kept Tobey a secret,” Jack mumbles as Pacey pulls Adam into the loft.

“Don’t mind her, she’s just allergic to holidays created by the greeting card companies.” Jen smiles, waving sweetly to their new guest.

“It’s a dumb holiday!” Joey insists before Jack shushes her with a friendly hand over her mouth.

Pacey rolls his eyes. “I have to change really quick, these idiots distracted me. If they say anything weird to you while I’m gone, I am so sorry.” He kisses Adam’s cheek quickly before disappearing into his room, flowers and all.

Adam laughs, watching Pacey leave before turning back to the others with a polite smile. He sits on the edge of their L-shaped couch. “So… What’s up?”

Jack glances at Jen and Joey before turning to Adam with a grin. “Just discussing how much of a slut Jen’s been lately.”

Jen’s eyes bulge out, and she slaps her best friend on the arm. Joey almost snorts with laughter.

“Oh, I heard about the Gretchen thing,” Adam says innocently. “Complicated stuff.”

Jen practically whips her head, trying her best not to look completely flushed. “Pacey told you about that?!” Adam nods sheepishly. “Oh my god,” the blonde mutters, hiding her face on Jack’s shoulder. “I am gonna kill him.”

“Can you postpone it until after tonight? I’ve got a busy day planned for him,” Adam half-jokes.

Joey’s eyes fall to her hands, trying her best to avoid Adam’s gaze. Thankfully, Jack speaks up.

“Jen, sweetie,” he jokes, taking his best friend’s face in his hands. “Would a sex therapist help? We can use money from the Dumbass Jar.”

Joey can’t help but laugh again, and even Adam joins in with a chuckle.

“That’s it,” Jen declares, her hands up in defeat. “I’m getting a cat.”

* * *

Joey was tired of flipping through channels that were only playing romantic movies, so she finally convinces herself to go on a walk. Jack was out with his apparent boyfriend, Jen was sticking to her word and looking for a cat (or so she claimed), and Pacey was working the late shift. Audrey was out on some club crawl. Andie had plans with Will.

She was officially alone on Valentine’s day.

She’s not really sure where she’s going; she’s just wandering aimlessly around town, taking random turns into places she thinks are pretty. She stops by a pizza shop to let herself indulge depressingly on some greasy comfort food, avoiding the eye of the guy behind the counter who’s either feeling sorry for her or checking her out inappropriately. She throws away her napkins and paper plate, and just as she steps out of the place, her eyes lock onto a couple across the street.

Joey instantly scrunches her nose up in disgust, already at her limit with all the cute annoying people she had had to witness today. But then her mind really registers who it is ---- none other than her ex-boyfriend and the woman he cheated on her with.

Cupid had a sick sense of humor.

Dawson was taking the unnamed blonde (Joey refused to learn her name) out for a nice stroll, probably after their super romantic Valentine’s day dinner. If she knew him well enough --- which, unfortunately, of course she did --- Joey _knew_ that he had gotten her some nice jewelry, compared her to a beautiful movie actress, and that they were currently on their way over to a nice bench under the stars so that he could use some plagiarized speech from an old 80s movie on her to make her blush.

Joey hates that she wishes he was still doing all that for her.

The blonde laughs loudly enough that Joey can hear it from across the street, and Dawson then lays a kiss on her cheek. He’ll probably never know that Joey saw all this, not that he would even care. He had clearly moved on. He’d found something better.

“Excuse me.” Someone says from behind her, and Joey realizes that she’s been frozen in her spot in front of the door this whole time.

“Sorry,” she says, finally getting out of the way and properly stepping outside. She turns her head to grab one last look at Dawson, watching him walk away with his arm around his new muse. With a sigh, Joey heads off in the opposite way, knowing exactly where she was gonna go.

* * *

Pacey’s day had been quite eventful. Adam took the whole day off from work, which still had his head spinning. His boyfriend was quite the workaholic, but today had been all about Pacey. Even now, while stuck working the night shift, he found himself smiling about it. He doesn’t even notice Joey is sitting in front of him at first. She had B-lined easily to a stool close to where she saw Pacey standing, clearly upset.

“Barkeep, fill me up, please,” she orders as she puts down a ten dollar bill. “It’s Valentine’s day and I’m gonna die alone.” She’s really only half-joking, but all the cheesy red and pink decorations around the bar certainly didn’t help her mood.

Caught off guard, Pacey furrows his brow at the sad woman in front of him. He was more than used to sad women making such requests while he was working so late, but it’s different when it’s a sad woman that he cares about. “Hello to you too.” He pushes the ten dollar bill back toward her before asking teasingly, “Isn't it past your bedtime?”

Joey laughs mockingly, pushing the money back again. “Very funny. I’d like a shot please.”

Pacey takes the money reluctantly. “All business? Okay.” He grabs a bottle of vodka without another thought, instinctively knowing it was her go-to. When he goes to grab a shot glass, he sees his little stash of candy hearts that Adam had given him earlier. _Dork._ Pacey didn’t know how Adam had done the unimaginable, Pacey didn’t hate Valentine’s Day for the first time in his life. Maybe after a year of being so miserable, he felt like he deserved to be so unapologetically happy. But he couldn’t deny that Adam was perfect. And it wouldn’t be long before Pacey screwed this up, so he was enjoying it while he could. He grabs the box of candy hearts and turns back to Joey. The miserable look on her face makes him feel kind of guilty for being so cheery, but not even that could stop him from placing the box of candy hearts in front of her, trying to wipe the grin off his face, “Not to be a stereotypical bartender, but do you want to talk about it?”

She brings her elbows to the bar and rests her hands on her cheeks. “No.” All she wanted to do was forget who she had seen on her walk here, and if she’s lucky, get so drunk that she doesn’t realize she’s mad at Pacey for being so _peppy_ tonight. She looks at the candy hearts he puts down in front of her and has to stop herself from scowling. She eyes one with _soulmate_ written on it and takes it with gentle fingers. She looks back up to Pacey before placing it in her mouth, then bites down on it, hard.

As soon as he finishes pouring, Joey downs the shot in one go, her face all scrunched up at the taste. “One more for good measure, please,” she says, trying not to cough. “And maybe some coke.”

“Is Pepsi okay?” Pacey tries to joke before asking earnestly, “If you don’t want to talk about it, then why’d you come to my bar of all places?”

Joey locks eyes with him, taking a deep breath and letting the alcohol properly hit before speaking. “Because I have an in with a bartender,” she answers with a forced smile. “And he usually takes pity on me and lets me mope around. Have you seen him?” Joey teases, craning her neck to look behind him to add to her act.

With an eye roll, Pacey pours her a proper drink. “Any good bartender knows not to play favorites with their customers. That leads to trouble.”

“Same goes for roommates,” Joey mumbles to herself, glad that Pacey was busy with a bottle and couldn’t hear her.

He finally passes her the drink, eyeing her carefully and trying to get a read on her. But lately, she had been impossible to read. “Whoever it is you're looking for must not be here.”

“Maybe he’s hiding somewhere.” Joey takes her new drink and downs half of it in one go, then swirls the ice around. “I don’t think I’ve seen him around since New Years.” It tumbles out of her before she even realizes what she’s _really_ saying.

Pacey stares at her dumbly, too caught off guard to fully react at first. This was the first time Joey had come close to mentioning what happened on New Years Eve, and Pacey felt frozen. He clears her empty shot glass, eyes glued to her. “What is that supposed to mean?”

She sighs. She had been hoping she could hide behind a “joke”, but clearly Pacey wouldn’t let her have this. Joey feels the familiar lightheadedness that follows alcohol consumption coming on, and it gives her the strength to stare back at him. Instead of answering, she finishes her drink and passes the empty glass to him without a word. _Let him figure it out for himself._

Without breaking eye contact, Pacey takes the glass, unsure if he should even give her the opportunity to order another drink. After a long moment of holding Joey’s gaze, Pacey turns away to grab a rag and wipe down the bar. If he’s being honest, it was an excuse to let himself get composed. He’s been avoiding the topic of their almost kiss for a lot of reasons, Adam being the main one. But he can’t deny that he has wanted to ask her _why_ she had leaned in. But then he’d have to explain why he had leaned in too, and it was too late for that. Without looking up at her, he asks, “Anything else I can do for you before my shift’s over?”

Joey actually feels a little sad at his question, but she’s not about to let him notice that. She clears her throat and tries to look as put together as possible, even though her quick drinks were beginning to make her head spin. “No,” she tells him, waiting for him to look up at her again, as if she could magically convince him to stay with just her eyes. But Pacey just nods, his gaze avoiding hers. He tosses the rag onto his shoulder and grabs her glasses to dump them in the sink, then after a quick moment, he returns to Joey with exact change for her two drinks. He places it in front of her, looking up at her silently before disappearing into the back room again. He lets out a breath that he didn’t realize he’d been holding.

“Shit,” Joey whispers to herself as she watches Pacey walk away, grabbing the money he left behind. She keeps it in her hands, ready to use it with the next bartender, especially now that she had managed to make herself feel even worse than when she walked in. She should have just told Pacey what was bothering her. She should just let her intoxicated self go wild and admit every little thing she had been thinking about him lately --- which she had to admit was a lot, and often. She could blame it all on the drinks the next morning and she knew Pacey would go along with it, but then the cycle would simply start all over again, and Joey was tired of it. She just missed him. She wished she never leaned in at that stupid party.

At some point while Joey was overthinking, Pacey slid onto the stool next to her. Now with his jacket on, as if to signify he was officially off the clock, he leans his elbows on the bar and waves to his friend behind it. “Hey, Becca. Can I get a coke?” He takes some of his crumpled up tip money from his pocket to pay, stealing a glance at Joey. He has no idea what’s going on with her, but he’d sooner die than leave her alone like this.

She’s startled by his voice beside her, almost jumping out of her seat before she realizes it’s him. “What are you doing?” she asks, brows furrowed.

“Driving you home,” he answers simply as his drink arrives. Pacey thanks his coworker with a nod and then turns back to Joey as if nothing was wrong. As if he wasn’t dying to ask her why she seemed to hate him so much lately. As if he wasn’t scared that he already knew the answer to that question.

“I can grab a Lyft, it’s fine,” she assures him, now feeling bad about her attitude towards someone who continued to be so annoyingly kind to her. “You probably had a long day. Just go home, Pace.”

Pacey nods. “I _did_ have a long day. And now I’m unwinding by having a nonalcoholic drink and wasting some time before I have to go home and hear all about Jen’s cat search.”

Joey can’t help the smile on her face. Damn him. “I think the cat has to find _you_ ,” she jokes despite her best efforts, and she’s relieved to see him crack a small smile. It gets her to soften up. “Seriously, Pacey, you shouldn’t feel obligated to babysit me.”

“If I wanted to leave, I’d leave,” Pacey shrugs. It wasn’t a lie. Sure, he could just ask Becca to look out for Joey and make sure she got into her Lyft okay, but even when she seemed mad at him, Pacey felt compelled to stay by Joey’s side. It confused him even more than her recent behavior. “I don’t feel obligated, Jo, I’m just being your friend.”

Her friend. Right. Joey almost lets out a groan. “You’re so…” _confusing_ , she wants to yell. How does he almost kiss her and then go off into a relationship with someone else? How does he just leave her with all these questions and feelings without any explanation? How does he keep breaking down every wall she puts up in self defense? It was infuriating, and she’s just about to snap before she’s interrupted by a man sitting on the open stool beside her. He reeks of alcohol and has clearly been here for a while, but he was around her age and pretty if she squinted.

“How’re you doing, sweetheart?” he asks, turning to catch Joey’s eye.

On a normal night, she’d simply throw him an uncomfortable smile and then find an excuse to leave, but for some reason, she felt compelled to play along this time. “Well, I’m sitting in a bar on Valentine’s day, so my guess is that it’s about as good as yours,” she answers with her best smile.

Pacey takes one look at this guy and rolls his eyes, looking down at his glass as Joey wastes her time with a response. _You’re so_ …. So what? What had she been about to say?

Joey’s new friend chuckles at her before calling the bartender over. “Well, then, we might as well wallow in self-loathing together,” he says as he tells her to order a drink. Joey sneaks a glance at Pacey, and wonders if she really should. But it was free, and Pacey _did_ offer to drive, so what was the harm, really? She asks for a rum and coke.

“And two shots of tequila,” the man adds, and Joey’s breath instantly hitches in her throat.

Pacey notices her reaction and leans forward on the bar. “If she wanted a tequila shot, she would’ve ordered one, man.” His voice is steady, which was taking a lot of effort on his part. He’s dealt with enough guys like this to know how to handle it, but something about this was different.

The man instantly furrows his brows, finally noticing Pacey is there. He turns his gaze back onto Joey. “Is this guy your boyfriend or something?”

Pacey rolls his eyes, taking a sip of his soda to keep himself from snapping at this guy. From behind the bar, Becca gives him a worried look, and he shakes his head to let her know it was fine.

Joey notices his silence, and for some reason it’s the last straw for her. “No,” she finally answers, and her words are laced with annoyance. “He’s just a _friend_.” She emphasizes that on purpose, and blames it on the alcohol. “My ride home, actually.”

“Yup, I’m her _friend_ ,” Pacey looks at Joey as he mutters the next part, “Or at least I’m trying to be.”

She’s fully avoiding him now. She turns her body back to face the stranger and sticks her hand out with a smile. “I’m Joey.”

He smiles drunkenly, and takes her hand to lay a kiss on it. “Eric,” he says, passing her a tequila shot. Joey still has a voice of reason in her head, and it’s telling her that this is a bad idea. But then she remembers that the person who she thought was her soulmate was now dating a blonde actress who slept with him after a drunk night out --- so honestly? Fuck it. She downs the shot. “God, those are gross,” she says to herself, and instantly goes to her spiked soda to drown out the taste.

Eric smiles at her, shifting in his seat to get a little closer. His eyes dart to Pacey before he lowers his voice. “You wanna go somewhere a bit more private?”

Joey doesn’t dare to look at her roommate, because she knows that he would somehow be able to convince her to stay with a single look. “Yes,” she tells Eric, and quickly gets up to follow him, even though she’s definitely way dizzier than before and will probably stumble a little on the way there.

“Jo...” Pacey’s voice comes out softer than he plans. He starts to reach out to touch her arm but hesitates. “Wait ---” But she’s already walking away.

Joey takes a seat at a booth in the far corner of the bar, and she’s surprised that Eric sits right beside her instead of across from her. She shifts a little, not having been expecting his touch this early in the night, but she’s too tipsy to really question it.

“Much better,” he says, his lips close to her ear. He was probably trying to be sexy, but she could still smell the alcohol in his breath and had to stop herself from gagging at it. This guy was _way_ drunker than she thought. He hid it well, though, almost like he did it so frequently he had mastered the art of it. “I think you’re very cute,” Eric whispers, his hand grazing up and down her arm.

She smiles, trying not to look uncomfortable. She had never really done something like this before, so maybe this is just how it went. After all, she did agree to go off with a guy at a bar, and on _Valentine’s day_ , so she probably should have expected this. “Thanks,” she answers. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

He seems to take that as a green light, and his hand shifts from her arms to her legs. Joey can’t help but wonder if Pacey is looking, if he even cares at all. She’s about to look up to check, but then Eric’s hand suddenly grazes a certain spot she was definitely not okay with him being _anywhere_ near. “What the fuck?!” Joey yelps, instantly pushing him away and standing up.

“What?” Eric questions, genuinely confused. “I thought we were having fun here.”

Joey had stood up way too quickly, and her stomach did not enjoy it. She feels like throwing up, her head is spinning, and there’s angry tears brimming in her eyes --- she should have trusted her gut and known that this would end badly. “You’re disgusting,” she practically spits to Eric, grabbing her purse and trying her best to find the exit despite her cloudy eyes and cloudy mind. She hears Eric groan and follow behind her so she picks up her pace, trying her best not to stumble. Joey has to stop as soon as she steps outside, leaning herself on the wall of the building for a minute to catch her breath and swallow down any vomit.

Pacey had already been on his feet when Joey stood up, the sound of her voice enough of a red flag for him --- then the sight of that asshole going after her had sparked something ugly inside of him. He follows them outside quickly, speaking sternly to Eric, “Hey, man, why don’t you go back inside?” It was more of a command than a question. Joey hears Pacey’s voice and instantly looks up with a relieved expression, her heart slowing down simply at the sight of him there. _Of course_ he was protectively threatening Eric for her without needing any explanation.

“No one called you over, _chauffeur_ ,” Eric spits back, rolling his eyes at Pacey. “We’re fine here. Mind your business.” He tries to reach for Joey’s hand, but she pulls away instantly, unable to form any words but shooting daggers at him as best as she could.

Pacey just rolls his eyes at Eric’s attempt to insult him, but when he sees him reach for Joey, something in him snaps. “Hey!” Before even thinking about it, he lunges forward and grabs Eric by the shirt. Pacey shoves him away from Joey roughly. “I said go back inside, asshole!”

Eric scoffs, trying not to look like he’s intimidated. He looks over at Joey, and though she’s still overwhelmed, she manages to hold his gaze, her eyes filled with hatred. Eric smiles back tauntingly, as if this reaction was exactly what he wanted from her. “She was practically asking for it,” he says, throwing her a disgusting wink.

Joey doesn’t know why that does it, but she has to swallow hard so she doesn’t fully sob and give that creep any more satisfaction --- or worse yet, let Pacey see her broken. Usually Joey was great in the face of trouble, and she managed to keep herself tall and steady. But she had already taken so many blows lately; from Dawson to the man currently saving her ass right now, Joey had been nothing short of a mess of feelings she couldn’t decipher. As always, she tried denying it, running away, ignoring it... but maybe all that had done was let it boil over to the point of no return. She couldn’t help but wonder: _Did_ she ask for it?

Pacey’s heart is racing beyond his control now, and before he can think better of it, he punches Eric in the face as hard as he can. Joey gasps, suddenly taken away from her thoughts as she watches Eric stumble backwards and fall on his ass. Even though he looks defeated, it doesn’t stop Pacey from shouting down at him, “If you even _look_ at her again, I’ll kill you, you miserable son of bitch. Now go the _fuck_ back inside.”

Joey watches in shock as Eric struggles to pick himself up, throwing a disgusted (but somewhat terrified) look over at the two of them before going back inside without another word.

“I…” Joey’s throat is dry. She didn’t know what to do or what to say, but she knew she felt absolutely fucking awful. She looks over to Pacey, and the sight of him waving his hand to get rid of the pain of punching someone square in the jaw for her makes her unravel. She finally gasps out, “Pacey…” It’s a soft whisper, a plea.

Joey’s voice gives Pacey chills and he quickly goes over to her, resting his good hand on her back gently. “I’m sorry,” he whispers, leaning down to try and catch her eye. She leans into his touch easily, relief finally washing over her thanks to a gentle and familiar presence.

When Joey leans into him slightly, Pacey sighs worriedly. “Are you okay?” he asks, gently pushing hair from her face with his bad hand so he could keep his other arm around her waist to keep her steady.

She can barely bring herself to nod. She doesn’t want him to worry, especially after everything that just happened, but she can’t lie to him, either. “He tried to, um… He wanted to do things I didn’t.”

It takes everything in Pacey not to lose his cool any more than he already has. He has to remind himself to breathe and remember that staying with Joey was more important than going back inside to beat the shit out of that asshole. He pulls Joey in closer without realizing it, resting his cheek against her hair, “He’ll never bother you again, Jo. I promise.” His voice is steady but gentle, breaking slightly. “I’m so sorry. I should’ve done something sooner.”

“I didn’t mean to --- I saw Dawson and his girlfriend earlier and…” Joey can’t seem to finish her sentences, her brain still not fully grasping what just happened. She’s been avoiding his eye, but when she finally catches it, she knows she looks pathetic.

Pacey sighs gently, understanding Joey’s behavior a little bit better, but his heart still sinks in his chest. “Hey, let’s go home.” His voice is soft, and it almost makes Joey want to cry. She doesn’t deserve him. He rubs her back before sliding his hand around to her side so he can help her stand properly. “Come on, Jo.”

She nods defeatedly, letting him guide her to the car without another word. Pacey doesn’t say anything either, too worried to even consider what could be going through her head right now. When they get to the car, he opens her door and helps her sit down, staying at her eye level to try and read her expression. “Hey, are you okay?”

She almost has to snap herself back to reality. Her head was beginning to hurt, probably from the combination of alcohol and disbelief at her current reality. When she turns to look at Pacey, who genuinely looks concerned, Joey offers him her best gentle smile. “Yeah.” Then, because she owes him, she adds truthfully, “As long as you’re here.”

Pacey softens even more, which he didn’t think was possible. And without thinking, he reaches forward with his good hand to wipe tears away carefully. Joey hadn’t even noticed that she had cried on the walk over. His hand is cold, and that’s the _only_ reason she gasps at his touch, she tells herself. He finally speaks, his voice gentle, “Well, I’m not going anywhere.” He can’t even muster up a smile because of how sad she looks. And he can’t help but worry that this was his fault.

Joey simply nods. She locks eyes with him for a minute, her head finally a little clearer. She would never want anyone to see her like this, but especially not Pacey, and especially not right now. She should have just gone home after seeing Dawson --- she hated how this evening turned out, but above all, she hated the fact that she had probably ruined a wonderful day for him. Adam probably went all out to make him feel loved and happy, and Joey just ended up making him worried and angry. She felt awful, and she wishes there was something she could do to take everything back and start over, time travelling back to when he hesitated to simply bump her fist. She didn’t know when things got so messy and complicated.

She looks back up to see Pacey taking a deep breath. His chest was heavy with concern for his friend, and he couldn’t help but think that he should’ve seen this coming. She’s been so off lately, but he was so preoccupied with his new relationship that he had let the red flags go unnoticed. He rests his hand on her arm. “Wanna know what _I_ did last Valentine’s Day? I stayed in bed until 8 o’clock at night and then ate my body weight in dumplings while crying.” Pacey winces at his inability to say the right thing, but Joey chuckles anyways. He smiles at her smile before adding quietly, “It’s a weird day. And I’m glad you knew you could come to me. If you were around last year… I would’ve gone to you.”

Joey’s breath catches in her throat, his words hitting her hard. She knew he wasn’t even saying that just to be nice and cheer her up --- he meant that. They had a weird gravitational pull towards each other, and somehow they just clicked in inexplicable ways. He’s right, too. She came to him for a reason, despite not even noticing what she was doing until she walked into the bar. She had been looking for him, knowing that he was the only one who would make her feel better. That’s what he’d done for her time and time again, and she was stupid to think that he would ever stop, even despite her putting walls up or him finding someone else. And goddamn it, she was still drunk and the softness in his voice makes her want to kiss him. But she’s learned her lesson for being weak before. “Thanks, Pace,” she says instead, sighing loudly as she gently pulls herself away from him to get her seatbelt on. _He has a boyfriend_ , she reminds herself for the millionth time.

Pacey smiles sadly, once again wishing he could read her mind so he could understand. He squeezes her arm gently and stands up, closing her door carefully. He thinks about what he just admitted to Joey and wonders what it _really_ means. It meant a lot, that was for sure. And it seems to have meant a lot to her. So why did his chest feel so empty?

* * *

Joey is quiet for most of the car ride, but she’s glad that it’s a comfortable silence between them. She’s missed that. By the time they make it home, her nose is stuffed and her migraine is pounding, but at least she has Pacey’s arm to grip onto.

Thankfully, Jen and Jack were nowhere to be found yet, so they have no one to explain themselves to. Pacey brings Joey right to her room, sitting her down on her bed extra carefully. He stands in front of her, almost kneeling down to take her shoes off but then feeling like he shouldn’t. Instead, he leaves to get her a tall glass of water from the kitchen. On the way back, he spontaneously decides to make a stop in order to change out of his smelly work clothes. He throws on a hoodie and his lame red pajama pants covered in dogs wearing santa hats. He hopes it’ll make Joey smile.

When he comes back, he finds Joey changed into her pajamas too, and Pacey can’t help but smile at her matching blue pants with a pattern that mirrors his. As he holds the water out to her, he comments sarcastically, “Hey, I thought Saturdays were _my_ days to wear the puppy pants!”

Joey laughs easily as she sees him, which is probably her first genuine laugh that day. “Hopefully you can make the exception. And don’t worry, I promise not to tell a soul that we’re matching right now,” she teases before taking the water gratefully and gulping down half of it in one go. She sets the glass on her bedside table once she’s done, and she knows that she should just get under her covers and leave this whole awful night at that, but she can’t help herself. “Pace…?” Joey’s voice is soft, and she looks up at him with her pleading eyes. “Can you stay with me for a bit?”

“Yeah. Of course,” Pacey answers lightly, as if his heart wasn’t breaking for her. Back when Joey first moved in, she was a mess over Dawson, but she had never been like this --- so vulnerable and soft. What had changed in six months? “We can look at your bookmark collection, or I can finally teach you how to play Poker. Oh, I can watch you knit, that’s always fun!” Pacey suggests without an ounce of sarcasm.

Joey nods, and she’s grateful that he’s so willing to offer so many things to do together as if the two of them hadn’t just come back from the worst situation possible. But everything he says sounds off. “That’s sweet, Pacey, but I don’t think my head could handle any of that right now,” she explains, looking back up at him. “Can you just sit here while I try to sleep, maybe?”

Pacey nods, wringing his hands nervously for reasons he can’t understand. “Sure.” He hesitates before sitting down on the edge of her bed. “But if you ask me to read you a story, I have to admit that all the books in here are definitely beyond my reading level.”

“Damn,” Joey jokes back easily as she gets under her covers. “Too bad Alex took _Goodnight Moon_ with him, huh?” Joey throws him a smirk, not laying down just yet. “Hey, Pacey?” She lets her head rest on her headboard, gathering up the courage to say what she wanted to say. “I’m really sorry. For… everything.”

He’s quick to shut her down. “What do _you_ have to be sorry about? Like I said, Valentine’s Day is weird. _I’m_ the one who should be apologizing. I know that asshole deserved it, but I got all macho,” Pacey shrugs, “You got a good look at high school Pacey tonight.”

Joey chuckles, despite being annoyed that he was ruining her genuine apology. She tries again. “Pace, seriously. I shouldn’t have done that tonight. I was stupid, and if you weren’t there, I don’t know what would have happened. So I’m sorry for getting you caught up in all of it, but also… Thank you.” Her eyes never leave his in a desperate attempt to make him take her seriously. She takes a deep breath before adding what she’d been meaning to say for a month now. “And I’m sorry for being distant and mean and… well, just the worst lately. You didn’t deserve that.”

Pacey drops his gaze down to his hands in his lap, shaking his head a little. While he’s annoyed that she insists on apologizing, he can’t help but feel a little better that her behavior hadn’t just been in his head. But her confirming it also confused him more. “Well, I’ll accept your apology _if_ you accept mine. And promise to stop apologizing.” He looks back up at her now. “You have nothing to be sorry about. You’re fine.”

Joey holds his gaze, narrowing her eyes through a bad attempt at a scowl. She finally sighs, rolling her eyes. “Okay. Fine,” she admits defeat. “God, we can’t even stop bickering when we’re trying to apologize to each other,” the girl points out with a chuckle. Any other night it might have been frustrating, but right now she couldn’t help but find it sweet and comforting. She throws Pacey a genuine smile. “I’ve missed you, you know.”

Pacey’s laughing quietly until she admits to missing him. Something about those words hurt him in a way he never could’ve expected. Because they still live together, they still sleep across the hall from each other, and he didn’t think she cared so much. But now, he had a sinking realization that he misses her too. Pacey pats the covers over her feet gently, “I’ve missed you too, Jo.” He didn’t know what this meant, to miss someone that he saw so regularly, but he knew it was true. So, he quickly deflects, “Now lay down, I can’t be sitting here all night. I have important reality television to catch up on.”

She hesitates to follow his instructions, feeling like there’s still something else she should do before calling it a night. Of course, she knows what it is. And, of course, she can’t actually do it. Joey swallows down her feelings, getting herself comfortable in her bed before finally closing her eyes.

Pacey’s soft smile is the last thing she sees.


	7. Funeral

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Just promise me you won’t take anything my family says too seriously?”
> 
> “Don’t worry, Jen and Jack already made me promise not to punch anyone,” she jokes instead. “Though it’s really only a few days. How bad could it be?”
> 
> And for the first time all day, Pacey laughs. “Oh, you have no idea.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all, so this is a pretty rough chapter (if you couldn't tell by the title), especially for Pacey. And while we had lots of muse and posted this very quickly (since our last chapter), it's important to us that we warn everyone before reading. obviously, we didn't take writing a chapter like this lightly and have been talking about it in detail for over a month. :) we snuck in some cute new york travels to try and balance it out. 
> 
> This chapter deals heavily with Death and Grief and Pacey's very difficult relationship with his family. It also has some Alcohol Abuse later on in the chapter. 
> 
> Thank you all for reading and leaving comments! We hope you enjoy the chapter <3  
> -mars & shan

Pacey has never attempted to make scrambled eggs before. The directions he found on Google were easy enough to navigate (once he scrolled past the long story that had nothing to do with eggs.  _ What was that about?)  _ The steps were easy, but still Pacey just stands in front of the stove for a long moment to go over the steps in his head. For the first time ever, Pacey was the first to wake up this morning. He’s been saying all month that he was going to actually start using the kitchen utensils that Bess and Bodie got him for his birthday almost three months ago. So far, all he’s done is eaten cereal with the huge cooking spoon because all the regular spoons were dirty. 

When he finally gets started, it’s not nearly as stressful as he imagined. But he still hovers over the pan nervously, hesitantly pushing the eggs around like the recipe instructed. There’s a knock at the door and Pacey groans, calling out, “Come in!!”

After a moment, the person simply knocks again.

Pacey groans again, diligently pushing the eggs around some more as they start forming some real shape. He quickly runs to the door to unlock it, rubber spatula in hand. He opens the door to see Gretchen, who looks exhausted but he’s too preoccupied to really notice. “Oh hey, what are you doing here so early?”

“Uh, I need to talk to you.” Gretchen averts her eyes to the side, tucking some hair back behind her ear. 

“Okay, if it’s about Jen again, spare me. I’ve got eggs on the stove.” Pacey walks back towards the kitchen, assuming his sister will follow him. “Twelve eggs is enough for four people, right? I’m worried it won’t be enough.”

Gretchen sighs, closing the door behind her. She stands by the counter awkwardly, watching her younger brother work. “Pace.”

“Making scrambled eggs is so easy, I don’t know what Mom was always complaining about---” He turns to see Gretchen’s face fall. “Gretchen?”

All thoughts of cooking leave Pacey’s head as he goes to his sister, finally noticing how upset she looks. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think this would be so hard,” she says. 

“What is it?” Pacey speaks softly, placing his hands on her arms supportively. 

“Dad had a heart attack last night,” Gretchen all but whispers, tears brimming. “He didn’t make it, Pacey.”

Pacey’s brow furrows immediately, taking the words in slowly. He tries his best to go over the words in his head, but can’t get his brain to do its job. He can’t come up with anything to say. Or think. Or feel. He sees Gretchen’s mouth moving, but he can’t seem to hear her. He can hear everything else though. The cars outside, water running down the hall, sizzling behind him on the stove and the pounding of his heart. But, all he can think about is the burning in his lungs. His chest feels tight for a moment before he realizes he’s been holding his breath. Pacey takes a deep breath in and lets out a hollow, “ _ Oh. _ ”

“I’m sorry, Pace.” Gretchen is looking at him with so much worry that he just wants to hug her. He wants to ask if  _ she’s  _ okay. But his lips feel stuck together. 

“Pacey? I’m really sorry, Doug was going to call you, but I asked him not to. I thought me telling you might be better,” Gretchen explains, her voice breaking through to him somehow. 

Pacey nods in agreement, his voice cracking as he forces out, “When?”

“In the middle of the night.” Gretchen wipes her tired eyes quickly and finally Pacey’s brain allows him to move. He hugs his sister tightly. 

“Have you slept at all?” he asks.

“I did a couple hours before he called. But once I knew, I just, I don’t know. My brain won’t shut off. This is so…” Gretchen trails off as Pacey pulls away from their hug. He keeps his gentle hold on her arms.

“Complicated, yeah,” Pacey nods, understanding exactly what she means. Their father was never very loving or supportive, especially to Pacey.  _ So why did he feel so shitty? _ “Did you talk to mom?” 

Gretchen shakes her head, “No, not yet. Doug said she was still in shock.”

Pacey just nods, noticing he was holding his breath again and takes another deep breath to stop the burning sensation in his chest.  _ Burning.  _ Something clicks in his brain and he realizes the burning isn’t just a feeling in his chest. It’s also a stench wafting through the loft. Pacey turns away from Gretchen to run to the stove. He mutters a quick, “Shit!” as he attempts to salvage the overcooked eggs.

“Is something on fire?” Jen asks, entering the room with Jack and Joey in tow.

“Oh my god, is  _ Pacey  _ using the oven?” Jack asks dramatically, only noticing Gretchen’s expression after. 

Pacey’s back is to them as he scrapes the burnt eggs onto a plate. He turns around to put the plate down on the island that separated him from everyone else. He keeps his eyes down on the burnt disappointment, letting out a sad laugh. “Yup, I tried making eggs. I did really bad.” 

When he finally looks up, all three of his roommates seem to have realized they walked into something uncomfortable. Gretchen’s cheeks were drenched with tears now and Pacey couldn’t let her say the words again. So, he forces out a clear, “Our dad died,” and avoids eye contact at all costs.

Jen places a hand on Gretchen’s back before quickly pulling her into a hug. Not even their current awkward standings could stop her from comforting her. 

The silence in the room weighs on Pacey’s shoulders like a ton of bricks as he turns away from everyone to grab more plates. He sniffles quickly before turning back around, stealing a glance up at Jack and Joey. They both look so stunned as they watch him. He’s happy Jen is busy with Gretchen so he doesn’t have any more eyes on him. 

“Pace, I’m really sorry,” Joey finally speaks up, her voice gentle. She’s trying not to be the annoying and overbearing person that she hated being around when her mom died, but being on the other side of things gives her a new perspective. It’s even more complicated when the person is someone you really care about.

“It’s fine,” Pacey shrugs weakly, reminding himself to breathe again. He’s trying his best to ignore the heat in his face and hoping that his face isn’t red. His heart is pounding in his chest at the thought that anyone is feeling sorry for him right now and he feels like he might pass out. He keeps his eyes down as he starts to leave the room. “I’ll be right back.”

Joey wants to do nothing more than to follow Pacey and stop him in his tracks, offering a tight hug and an ear to listen. But she knows him. And she still remembers when this happened to her --- vividly. He needs time alone to process, so she watches him go sadly and instead turns her attention to Gretchen. Jen is still holding on to her, and she gives Joey a nod to let her know that it’s okay to join in. So she does. And so does Jack. And they all envelop the oldest Witter with their embrace, wordlessly.

When they all pull away, Gretchen seems a little more put together. “Thanks, guys,” she says with a soft smile, wiping the tears from her cheeks. She’s still a Witter after all, and vulnerability is weakness. 

Jen pushes Gretchen’s hair out of her face softly, and the two of them share a moment of locked eyes before Jack clears his throat loudly to aid his best friend. 

“Right,” Jen mumbles before taking a small step back. “Look, we’re here for you both if you guys need anything.”

“Absolutely,” Joey agrees. “Trust me, I have experience. Let us know if we can help in any way.”

“Yeah,” Gretchen says with a nod. Jack goes into the kitchen to pour her a cup of water, and she takes it with a grateful smile. “If there’s anything I’m worried about, it’s the funeral.”

“Oh, shit,” Jack says under his breath. “Do you know when it'll be?”

“Some time next week. We need to buy our tickets as soon as possible,” Gretchen answers after a sip. “I just don’t know if I’m ready to handle my family like this. Or how Pacey will be, for that matter.”

Jen instantly locks eyes with Jack, raising her eyebrow wordlessly. He narrows his eyes, and then shakes his head. Jen sighs, locking eyes with Joey instead. Surprised, Joey simply gives her a small smile, not sure what she wanted. But to Jen, it was all she needed. “We can come with you guys.”

Jack huffs with a roll of his eyes, and Joey’s expression is full of surprise. Gretchen raises her eyebrows too, and Jen is sure she’s about to say no, but then she’s caught off guard. “Sure,” Gretchen says. “I mean, if it’s not too much trouble for any of you. I mean, Jen, I know  _ you _ can handle them, so it makes sense.”

“And I don’t go anywhere without Jack,” Jen persists, quietly elbowing her best friend in the ribs.

He yelps a little, but with a groan, he gives in. “Right. Sure. If you guys need the support, of course I can come.” 

Gretchen throws them a smile, and then catches Joey’s eye. “Shit, Jo. I don’t wanna single you out, but you’re the only one who’s never seen… Well, let’s just say that this may not be the best first impression of the Witter family if you decide to come.”

“I don’t think she’d get a good impression no matter the occasion,” Jen mumbles.

“I wanna go,” Joey says confidently. “I wanna be there for ---”  _ Pacey.  _ “--- you guys. I know how awful losing a family member is, and I can help.”

“I mean, her and Pacey really  _ are _ close,” Jen pipes up with a small smirk. “If he’s gonna listen to or talk to anyone, it’ll be Jo.”

Joey tries not to blush. “Plus, I’ve always wanted to visit New York,” she adds.

“Oh yeah, you’ve never been!” Jack remembers. “Well, no day but today.”

Jen rolls her eyes. “Please don’t quote RENT right now.” 

“I’m getting into the New Yorker spirit, Jen.”

Pacey finally re-enters the room, looking much more composed now, but his mind is still racing. He pokes around the burnt eggs with a fork hopelessly. “I guess I should just throw these away, huh?”

Jack comes over to the island and shakes his head. “No, I’ll definitely still eat those,” he says as he starts serving himself quietly. 

“Thanks.” Pacey keeps his eyes down for a moment before looking up at the girls, who are still standing together. He makes sure to steady his voice as he asks, “So when are we going back, Gretchen?”

Gretchen hesitates, glancing at Jen. “Next weekend.”

“We’re coming with you,” Jen tells Pacey with conviction. 

Pacey can’t help but steal a glance at Joey. “You don’t have to, it’s going to be a mess.”

“We want to,” Jack assures him, eating quietly.

Gretchen sighs. “Pace, just let them. We could use all the back-up we can get.” 

Pacey lets out his own sigh, wondering how Gretchen seems so okay with letting other people deal with her problems. That was never something Pacey felt comfortable doing. Even after all these years of Jen having a front row seat to his dysfunctional family, it still takes some persuading for him to let her help. But he doesn’t want to fight Gretchen on this, so he just nods. “You’re right.”

Joey attempts to catch his eye so he can see how genuine she is right now. “We’re your friends, Pacey. We wanna be there for you. Please?”

He tries so hard to keep his eyes down, but he can’t help but meet Joey’s gaze. Part of him feels slightly better at her soft tone. “It’s fine, Jo. And hey, you’ll finally get to see New York,” he shrugs, deciding to busy himself with cleaning up the mess he’s made in the kitchen. He doesn't want to think about the fact that this means Joey meeting his family.

“Yeah,” Joey whispers, mostly to herself, touched at him knowing that. She can’t help the smile on her face --- at least, until she catches Jen and Jack looking at her with raised brows. She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear nervously. “Alright, so, guess I'll go pack.”

* * *

“Okay, we need a game plan,” Jack announces.

“Why?” Joey asks genuinely as she finally joins her two roommates at their dinner table. “Pacey’s allowed to grieve, you guys.”

“Of course he is,” Jen agrees beside her. “But Pacey’s relationship with his dad is… a fragile topic. We’re not sure what’s gonna happen, so we need to be ready for every possible outcome.”

Joey raises her eyebrow in question, but shrugs defeatedly anyway.

“Alright, Jen and I have jokes already planned for if things ever get awkward or uncomfortable.” Jack looks at the blonde, who nods knowingly along, before continuing. “And, Jo, you’re gonna be our secret weapon.”

Joey turns to face him with a puzzled expression. “Wait, what? What does that mean?”

“Look, you can’t deny that you two have this weird connection,” Jack answers easily. “We have no idea how or why it works, but it does. So if he’s ever close to feeling like shit, we’re just gonna send him your way and leave you to work your magic.”

Joey doesn’t even want to begin to think about the implications of what he just said, so she just sighs. “Yeah, fine.”

“Great. And, look, Jo, Pacey’s family is complicated. And Jen and I are assuming that they’re gonna be even  _ more _ tricky than usual, so our advice is to just… Well…”

Jen takes over to help him out. “Don’t let yourself get too caught up in their toxicity, okay? It’s only a few days and we’ll mostly stay with Grams, so hopefully not too much damage will be caused. But to be safe, we’re just giving you a heads up now: Resist any urge to punch unless absolutely necessary, okay?”   


Joey’s heard about Pacey’s family before, even a little bit from the Witter son himself. She knew things were iffy and that they weren’t the  _ best  _ family, but Jack and Jen were kind of scaring her. There’s no way they were  _ that _ awful, not when Pacey turned out so great. Guess she’d have to find out for herself. “Alright, then,” she says. “I will keep my fists to myself to the best of my abilities.”

“That’s our girl,” Jen jokes with a grin. “Well, that’s all you needed to know, really. We just have to be gentle with him.”

“As if I’m not?” Joey teases, but she’s not totally kidding. Ever since Pacey had saved her on Valentine’s Day, the two of them had been on a high in their friendship, barely arguing anymore and throwing each other soft smiles across the room to check up on the other throughout the day. She’d become quite fond of those moments, even if all they really did was add to the mess of her feelings for her roommate. 

Always with the perfect timing, Pacey’s key turns the lock and he comes home from another shift. The trio stop talking instantly, badly pretending like they were in the middle of something else as Pacey approaches them. He throws them a forced smile as he makes his way to the fridge.

“Hey, Pace,” Jen greets him softly. “How was work?”

“Same as always,” he replies easily, shoving some “borrowed” beer from the bar into their fridge.

“Are you all packed?” Jack asks.

“Almost done,” Pacey lies with a nod. He walks off into his room without another word.

The three of them at the dinner table share uncomfortable sad looks, before Joey gets up from her chair and follows Pacey to his bedroom. She sneaks in behind him before he can close the door. 

“Oh,” Pacey says once he notices it’s her. “What’s up, Jo?”

Joey wants to smile at him, but it would just look forced. She also wants to hug him, but they’d never done that before and she’s wondering how much good it would actually do. She knows he’s pretending to be okay, either for their sake, his, or both. She’s been there. So she simply sits down on his bed and beckons him over without a word. 

He raises an eyebrow questioningly, but still takes a seat beside her. “Yes?”

“Can we be real for a second?” Joey asks, and Pacey actually smiles a little.

“Is this about another guy you need me to punch for you?”

She rolls her eyes slightly. “Pacey, you know I’m here, right?”

“Yes, Jo, you are, indeed.”

“Pace, I’m trying to be genuine,” she pleads, though she does let a smile shine through for a second. “Look, if you need to talk about anything, I think we all agree that, out of everyone in this loft, I can understand what you’re going through the most.” Pacey finally sighs, not being able to joke his way out of this anymore. She continues, “Losing a parent is really hard, regardless of your relationship with them. And I’m not trying to be pushy or overbearing, but I just need you to know that I’m here. Whenever you need me, just say the word.” 

Pacey looks down at his lap until Joey finishes, stealing a glance at her quietly. He really does appreciate it, but the thought of talking about his dad is suffocating. More suffocating now that he’s gone, oddly enough. All week, he'd kept to himself and just hoped that nobody would try and breach the subject. Maybe if they didn't talk about it, his roommates would forget all about it and not go with him. _Yeah, right._ He sighs, nodding, “I know, Potter. Thanks.” Pacey forces a smile, not caring how hollow it definitely looks. “I just don’t want to talk about him. I’m gonna have to when we get to New York and that’ll be bad enough.”

“From personal experience, _ not _ talking about it makes it worse,” Joey admits. “But, hey, that’s why you have us to be there with you.”

“No offense, Jo, but your mom actually loved you. This is different.” He shrugs, used to pretending that it doesn’t bother him. “It sounds bad, but it’s true. And you guys being with me has its pros and cons. Just promise me you won’t take anything my family says too seriously?”

Joey feels a little guilty, but she lets the moment pass. Pacey has all the right to say that, really. “Don’t worry, Jen and Jack already made me promise not to punch anyone,” she jokes instead. “Though it’s really only a few days. How bad could it be?”

And for the first time all day, Pacey laughs. “Oh, you have no idea.”

* * *

Joey was simply trying to read her book while waiting for boarding, but Pacey and Jen’s hushed arguing really wasn’t letting her concentrate. It’s not like she was snooping, really. It's  _ their  _ fault for being awful at whispering angrily. She keeps her face in her book, but her ears tune into their conversation. 

“Pace, I know you’re a bit overwhelmed at the moment but ---” Jen tries to whisper condescendingly, but Pacey interrupts. 

“Overwhelmed? Me? What about?” He shrugs, bringing a hand to his chest dramatically. “What do _ I _ have to be overwhelmed about?!”

“I just meant that if you didn’t want Adam to see you like this then that’s all you have to say, okay? There’s no point in lying to me.” 

“I don’t remember asking for advice on my relationship, but thanks,” Pacey groans, rubbing his eyes. “I didn’t lie. Adam’s up for some huge promotion and I wasn’t going to let him miss work just to witness the shit-show that is my family. He actually cares about his job.  _ Shocking _ , I know.”

“You told him not to come.”

“I told him the truth, which is that  _ I  _ don’t even want to go, so why should he be forced to? It’s perfectly reasonable.” Pacey glances up at the screen above their departure door, sighing. “We’ve only been dating for a couple months, that’s too soon to meet families. Especially mine. At a funeral.”

Jen rolls her eyes so hard that Joey can’t help but worry they’ll get stuck like that. “I’m just saying, this is what you do, Pacey. What  _ we  _ do. We push people away when things get complicated.”

Pacey turns to face Jen, looking her straight in the eye. “It's not complicated. My dad was a dick and now he’s dead. He’s a dead dick. Very simple.”

Joey is about to either gasp dramatically or laugh her head off awkwardly at Pacey’s words, but thankfully Jack arrives to save her ass. “Here,” he says, handing her a Starbucks cup. “You better chug that, though. We might be boarding soon.”

“Thanks, Jackers,” she says with a smile, setting her book down and gathering herself. She glances over to Pacey and Jen who seem to have stopped talking upon Jack’s arrival and were now simply stewing separately. “And I can take this on the plane.”

“What?” Jack exclaims. “ _ No way _ . My whole life, my dad always made sure we finished all our snacks before boarding otherwise we would be taken away by airport security --” Joey raises her eyebrows with a chuckle and Jack shakes his head in sudden realization. “Okay, I see now. He’s a big bad liar who lies. Noted.”

“Seems like we all have daddy issues, then,” Joey mumbles before taking a tentative sip of her drink. 

As if she summoned him with those words, Pacey gets up from his seat across from them and sits himself down on the free chair beside Joey. He grumbles as he attempts to untangle his headphone wires. “I hate this stupid airport, we got here early and for  _ what?! _ We’ve been sitting here forever.”

“I’ve got bad news, Pace. When we’re done sitting here, we get to sit some more on the plane,” Jack teases. “And then in a cab. And then --”

“Yes, Jack, lots of sitting to look forward to. Sitting and talking and being psychoanalyzed by the future shrink over there.” Pacey glances in Jen’s direction, and she sticks out her tongue at him childishly, knowing he’s talking shit. 

Joey stays quiet, pursing her lips, but Jack raises an eyebrow with a laugh. “Did I miss something while I was off running errands?”

“Jen’s decided that now is a good time to give me relationship advice. Which is rich since  _ her _ love life is a mess,” Pacey retorts, dropping his headphones in his lap in defeat and sighing. “Jack, you’ve gotta switch seats with me.”

“What?” Jack questions, his eyebrows shooting up in surprise. “You wanna…?”

Before Jack can finish his question, Joey can’t help but interrupt, looking at Pacey with a puzzled expression. “You know that means you’d sit beside  _ me _ , right?”

“At this point, I’d rather sit out on the wing than get into it again with Jen,” Pacey jokes, holding his ticket out to Jack. 

Jack takes a second to lock eyes with Joey, and though she’s not a master at wordlessly communicating with him like Jen is, she’s not half bad. She finally gives him a shrug, and Jack turns back to Pacey and takes the ticket, exchanging it with his own. “Alright. I guess I’ll toughen up and sit beside my best friend,” he whines dramatically with a smile. “God, five hours of  _ you two  _ sitting together. I should have bought some ear plugs.”

Joey scoffs, but she’s not sure if he’s that wrong to begin with. If Pacey was arguing with Jen already, it was only a matter of time before  _ she  _ also said something to piss him off. Speaking of… “I call window seat!” Joey exclaims excitedly.

“Oh real nice, my dad dies and you stick me with an aisle seat.” Pacey whines, fully joking, although the words felt odd coming out of his mouth.  _ Too soon? _

“No dead dad pass until we’re in the city,” Joey teases back, knowing he needs the normalcy.

They finally get called to board, and while Jen and Jack are laughing about a dumb joke, Pacey and Joey stay quiet just a few rows back, each too caught up in their own heads. Joey’s not sure what she should say or what she should do, if she should even try either of those things at all. It’s only a four hour flight after all. Surely silence wouldn’t be the worst option.

“Please say something, you not being a blabbermouth is freaking me out,” Pacey finally says, breaking their silence.

Joey narrows her eyes at him dramatically. “I don’t  _ blab _ .”

“You definitely blab. Now come on, Potter, tell me some facts about an old classic book no one cares about, it’ll help lull me into my nap.”

She scoffs. “Now I’m  _ really  _ not gonna say anything.”

Pacey nudges her arm teasingly. “Okay, would reverse psychology work, then? Please, Jo, don’t talk about anything. I would like nothing but silence because I  _ really  _ want to be alone with my thoughts right now. Thoughts about seeing my family and having to deal with a funeral and --”

“Alright, I get it,” Joey cuts him off, not wanting Pacey to spiral before they’ve even gotten fifteen minutes into the flight. She feels sorry for him, of course she does, and obviously she’ll do whatever he wants to help him out. “Well, I don’t know if you know this, but I’ve always wanted to travel. Paris is my big one, but New York is a close second.”

“Don’t know why that is, but sure. Continue.”

“What do you mean?” she questions. “New York is one of the most beloved cities in the world for a reason. Everything happens there, and for someone who comes from a tiny town where  _ nothing _ happens, that’s a pretty amazing deal.”

“If by ‘things’ you mean getting meningitis from public transportation, rats scurrying over your feet like it’s nothing, and trash literally lining the streets. Then yes, things certainly do happen in New York. I promise it’s just another place.” Pacey deadpans.

“Trust me, all of that still puts Capeside to shame,” Joey argues. 

She talks about all of the articles she’s read about the city, some of the research she’d done to be prepared ( _ We’re only actually in the city for one day, Jo _ ), and then somehow ends up talking about a Toni Morrison book she’d read once about 1920’s Harlem and how interesting it was. Clearly Pacey wouldn’t have been a fan --- not that he’d read the book in the first place anyways --- because when Joey looks over to him about an hour into their flight, he’s sound asleep. She smiles softly to herself as she watches him, knowing he didn’t do it on purpose, though that was probably what he was going to tease her about as soon as he woke up. She knows he hadn’t slept much for the past few nights, so he needed this. She takes out a book from her backpack and starts reading, leaving her window shade open halfway so she can know when they’re getting close to their destination. 

At some point during her book, she feels Pacey sleepily readjust himself beside her, and it ends with him resting his head on her shoulder. Joey stiffens for a moment, not sure how she should feel about it. Well, actually, that would be a lie. She knows exactly how it feels. It feels right. But the fact that it does just makes her panic, and the little butterflies in her stomach that come out of his sudden touch don’t seem to want to quiet down. She’s pretty much helpless, because she really doesn’t want to disturb him since he deserves the peace and quiet. So she swallows down her feelings and leaves him there, trying her best not to move too much. Eventually she ends up subconsciously leaning her head on his while she reads, which would come back to bite her because Jen definitely saw it on her way to the bathroom. 

A few hours later, Joey squeals despite herself. “We’re here!” She looks out the plane window like a child, mesmerized with the bright lights and endless buildings. 

Pacey grumbles beside her, her sudden movement waking him up instantly. “Yippee,” he mumbles sleepily, rubbing his eyes. 

She goes to grab her carry-on luggage once the plane lands, but since Pacey is the one sitting by the aisle, he beats her to it. He hands her her luggage with a sleepy smile, which Joey matches with her own.

“Thanks for letting me sleep there, Potter,” he says.

“It’s not happening again. You snore,” she lies easily.

Jen and Jack were seated two rows in front of them, and Joey finally makes eye contact and instantly notices that the two of them had definitely been crying. She sighs. “What movie did you two watch?”

“Paddington,” Jen says, rubbing her sad eyes with a pout.

“One _ and  _ two,” Jack adds, and Joey can’t help but smile with a shake of her head.

“He found a family, Jo,” Jen says, and Jack shushes her before she starts crying again. 

“I get it, Jen, but we really need to get out of this plane,” he says, helping her stand up. “Mostly because I  _ really _ want marmalade right now.”

They all make it through bag check quickly, then catch a cab while the sun is setting. Joey just wants to walk around this city until her feet hurt, but she’ll save all her energy for tomorrow. They arrive at Grams’ house in a half hour, just barely beating the rush hour traffic. 

And sure enough, the first thing Jack says when he hugs her is, “Do you have any marmalade?”

Grams laughs with a shake of her head. “I’m afraid I don’t, my boy, but I will put it on the grocery list just for you.”

“God, I missed you,” Jack answers with a grin before laying a kiss on her cheek.

“Hi, Grams,” Jen then says with a big smile, tightly hugging her grandmother. “It’s so good to see you.”

“Oh, Jennifer,” Grams says in her usual tone, “You haven’t changed one bit.”

“Not since you saw me for Christmas a few months ago, no,” Jen agrees with a chuckle. “We brought more  _ wee devils _ for you to take care of this time, though.”

“Ah, yes,” Grams nods. “My favorite little rascal.” She locks eyes with Pacey, and then gives him a genuine hug. “I was very sorry to hear about your father, Pacey.”

Pacey smiles softly, comforted by Grams’ presence immediately. He hugs her tightly. “Don't get soft on me, Grams. I can still take the heat, I promise.”

She shakes her head gently, still smiling, as she looks past Pacey to Joey. Pacey glances over his shoulder, eyes softening at how excited Joey looks to see Grams. “And of course, you know Joey already.”

Joey smiles instantly, extending her hand. “Hey, Mrs. Ryan. It’s been a while.”

Grams shakes her head and pulls her in for a hug instead. “Too long, my dear. Please, call me Grams. It’s so great to see you again.”

“Likewise,” Joey agrees, chest warm from the feeling of home she instantly got around these people. 

“I hope these kids have been treating you well. I’m very glad they took my advice and agreed to welcome you,” Grams says, looking pointedly at Pacey. Clearly Jen had told her about his hesitation at the beginning.

Pacey rolls his eyes with a laugh, turning to Jen. “Don’t you two ever get tired of talking about me behind my back?”

Joey instantly pipes up. “We do it all the time when you have shifts at the bar.” Jack and Jen giggle in response.

“Don’t worry, Jo, we all have  _ plenty  _ to say when you’re out, too.” Pacey shoots her a teasing grin.

Joey gasps dramatically, hitting him softly on the arm in retaliation.

Jen, used to their banter, just overlooks it and changes the subject as she sets all their bags down. “Thanks for hosting us on such short notice, Grams.” 

“Oh, of course. It’s why I’m here. Both rooms are set up. You girls can share Jennifer’s old room and boys, you know where the guest room is,” she explains as she leads them toward the staircase. 

“Oh.” Pacey clears his throat awkwardly. “Thanks Grams, but I’m actually going  _ home _ .” The word doesn’t seem to fit the circumstance, but he forces a sad smile anyway. “My mom needs some help making arrangements for tomorrow night and I kind of volunteered to help.”

Jen avoids Grams’ eye, already knowing this was Pacey’s plan. Of course, Jen has plenty of concerns about Pacey staying with his family all weekend. She’s comforted by the fact that Gretchen will be there to keep him somewhat sane, but it still isn’t an ideal situation. Thankfully, her and Jack had already planned on what to do if Pacey’s night there went horribly.

“Nice! I’ve got a room all to myself,” Jack jokes as he comes into the living room, already somehow having a snack in his hand. 

“I hope you’ll stay for dinner, at least,” Grams touches Pacey’s arm gently. “I’m sure you miss my home cooked meals as much as Jennifer and Jack do.”

“Pacey is learning to cook right now, actually,” Joey chimes in, totally uninvited but not being able to help herself. “He’s been attempting for us here and there, so if you want a sous chef, I’m sure he’d love the practice.” Joey winks at him with a smirk.

Pacey furrows his brow at her before turning back to Grams. “Have I mentioned that Joey is a big fan of  _ not  _ minding her own business?”

Grams shakes her head in that disapproving, yet fond way. “How about you three put your bags away while Pacey helps me cut some vegetables?”

“Come on, Grams, you  _ know  _ that means these two will make  _ me  _ take all their bags for them while Pacey gets to snack with you,” Jack whines with a dramatic pout. 

“Well, you’ve already snacked, so you’re out of the running,” Jen retorts, taking his bag of chips away from his hands and rolling it up.

“Hey! That’s my pre-dinner meal!” 

“Well, let’s go work it out with a few laps on the stairs, shall we?” Joey joins in on the teasing, and the girls throw winning smiles at each other.

“See?” Jack complains. “Unfair. Targeted bullying. And in the house of a devoted Christian, no less.”

“Don’t bring the Lord’s name where it isn’t needed, Jack,” Grams warns, though it’s clear that she’s just joining in on the gang up on him.

Jack sighs defeatedly, getting up from the couch. “Fine. But only because this means you all agree that I’m the muscles of the group.”

Pacey laughs. “Whatever helps you sleep at night, Jackers.”

* * *

Pacey had left a few hours ago, and the three remaining travelers and Grams were now seated on the living room couch after doing the dishes together. Grams kept asking Joey questions about her LA life, always genuinely interested and listening intently to the answers. Joey knew that she would tell that woman anything she wanted, and she was a little scared of her power. She always had been. 

“Well, it sounds like you all get along really well,” Grams says with a smile. “I’m very relieved to hear it.”

“Jo is a fellow dumbass, so of course she fits right in,” Jack teases, squeezing Joey’s cheek. She sticks her tongue out at him in response.

“Yeah, I have a feeling you’ll be seeing a lot more of Joey here,” Jen agrees. “She snuck her way right into our little hearts.”

Grams smiles. “Of course she did. None of us ever could resist you, dear,” she says, and Joey grins. “I’m very glad you were able to find friends to help you get over that Dawson boy. I never did like him.”

Jen breaks out into a laugh, and Joey snickers, too. “Trust me,  _ that boy _ is out of my system,” she assures them all.

“Thank goodness. He really was annoying,” Grams adds, and the laughter only grows. “I’m very sorry to speak ill of old neighbors, but we have proof of his misdoings now. And to a sweet girl, no less. The Lord Himself will deal with him, I’m sure of it.”

“I sure hope so,” Joey agrees through her laughter. 

“I’m sure you’ll find a great man in no time,” Grams assures her, resting her hand supportively over Joey’s. 

Jen and Jack share one of their many looks. “Maybe she has already,” Jack mumbles so only his best friend can hear, causing her to giggle.

Joey instantly narrows her eyes at them, scared of what they could be talking about, but she forces herself to turn her attention back to Grams. “Thank you so much for dinner tonight. It’s amazing to eat something other than takeout for once.”

“Anytime, my dear.”

“I think I should go and get ready for bed. I need to be rested up for tomorrow,” she says, getting up from her seat.

“Alright, sleep well, Jo,” Jen says as Joey leans down to kiss her cheek. Jack echoes the sentiment and places a quick peck on her forehead before she waves at Grams and makes her way up the stairs.

“She seems very different from the girl I watched climb through the Leery’s window every day,” Grams says once Joey is out of sight.

“Probably because she is no longer under Dawson’s weird spell,” Jen notes.

Grams pauses for a second, then says, “Her and Pacey seem sweet together.”

Jack and Jen break into a fit of laughter, trying to keep it contained so they don’t bother Joey upstairs. Grams raises a skeptical brow.

“They’re not dating,” Jack tells her.

Grams gasps, which doesn’t help their laughter. “Thanks to Jennifer, I've come to know Pacey quite well. And it's not hard to see that he's infatuated with her."

Jen nods through her giggles, before quickly straightening up. “Yeah, well, Pacey actually has a boyfriend. And he seems really happy.”

"We kind of caught the same vibe too, Grams," Jack adds, "He's seriously out of touch with his feelings."

Grams raises her eyebrows, “A boyfriend, really? And he didn’t come for the funeral?”

Jack glances at Jen, knowing she had similar concerns, before answering, “It’s only been a couple months.”

“And he’s working. And Pacey didn’t want him meeting his family like this,” Jen adds.

Grams gives them a disapproving look. “That sounds like too many excuses.”

“Yeah, I know. But now isn’t a great time to talk to Pacey about it.” Jen shrugs, “I’ve tried.”

“Well, dear,” Grams smiles a bit sadly, “If anyone can get him through this, you can. You have quite the experience with helping Pacey through a crisis.”

Jen nods slowly, smiling back. “I hope I can handle this weekend. I already annoyed him so much he didn’t sit with me on the plane.”

“He’s just going through a lot. You two are bonded for life, though,” Grams assures her. “It’s a special connection, sweetheart. It is not easily broken.”

Jack puts his arm around Jen’s shoulder and pulls her closer. “Like you and me, baby. Just not as insufferable.”

Jen giggles, leaning her head on his chest. “That’s fine. It’s only fair, since Joey and Pacey are also intolerable with their will-they-won’t-they.”

“Thank  _ God  _ we’ll never have sexual tension.”

Even Grams laughs at that one. Jen grins. “That’s the weirdest compliment I’ve ever gotten, Jackers.”

* * *

From the moment he walked into his childhood home, Pacey felt like he was on the verge of tears. He’d never been welcomed home with open arms before; in fact, when he left home it was the happiest he’d ever seen his family. But last night, each Witter took their turn hugging Pacey and crying into his shoulder, which had been odd, to say the least. Pacey had always been the Witter who cried, always the most sensitive. It was something they always teased him about. From a young age, his father taunted him tirelessly for being too soft. 

_ “You cry more than your sisters, you pansy!” _

The hardest part of all of this was keeping his bitterness concealed. When his oldest sister, Kerry, made a comment about their father  _ being in a better place now,  _ Pacey held in his scoff. And he buried the shame he felt for being so spiteful about something that had his whole family crying in the living room. He buried every bad thought he had until he felt nothing, and he played his part. He talked to Doug about funeral plans, he held his mother while she cried, and he even started working on cleaning out the garage for his mom. Regardless of how exhausted Pacey is from playing the role of a mourning son, he still can’t turn his brain off long enough to get decent sleep. It’s not surprising, but it’s definitely annoying. 

The next morning, Pacey makes his way down the street and does his best to focus on the cool spring air. Even if he doesn’t miss New York, he definitely misses actual seasons. LA’s eternal Summer is something Pacey is still getting used to, even after all these years. He takes a deep breath in and ignores the warm stinging in his eyes, a telltale sign of exhaustion. He takes a long sip of his coffee and carefully balances the box of cookies on his other arm. He thinks about how disappointed his friends would be if he dropped the box and ruined the cookies. Or if he was late. Or if the train he advised them to take was overcrowded. Or if they knew that he wasn’t sad that his dad is gone. Pacey shakes his head quickly. He’s never been good at switching from  _ With-His-Family _ Pacey to  _ Normal _ Pacey. He reminds himself that he doesn’t have to be on the defense with Jack, Jen, and Joey and that they wouldn’t hold things against him the way his family does. 

He’s relieved when he arrives on time and sees his friends waiting for him up ahead, leaning against the huge archway leading into Washington Square Park. He felt a smile coming on at how utterly bored Jen looks while Jack and Joey are taking in the sights around them. 

“Oh, thank god, Pacey is here,” Jen announces. “Please save me from these tourists,” she begs him.

“In their defense, we choose a pretty cliché meetup spot, Lindley.” Pacey lets out a hollow laugh, turning his gaze to Joey.

“Pacey!” She says excitedly as she runs over to him, gushing, “This arch is  _ amazing _ . It’s been on my bucket list to see it in person for years!” 

“So apparently Joey is a tour guide now,” Jack tells him with a smile. “She’s been spewing off facts like an animatronic at a museum for the past ten minutes.” 

“In that case, Jen and I don’t even have to be here.” He raises an eyebrow to Jen teasingly before holding out the box to her.

“I hope these cookies are as good as I remember,” Jen mumbles, cradling the box carefully.

“Look at the angel sculptures!” Joey exclaims to mostly herself. “Did you guys know that they were supposed to be modeled after the sculptor’s wives?”

Jack walks towards her and teasingly boops her nose. “Another fun fact, please.”

She rolls her eyes, slapping his hand. “Shut up.”

Pacey smiles to himself, yawning slightly as he points to Jen, “Best cookies in Manhattan, Jackers. I figured three for you and three for the rest of us to share.”

“Oh my god.” Jack is at Jen’s side instantly, peeking into the box as she opens it. “This is that Schmucker’s place you never shut up about?”

“Schmackery’s,” Jen corrects, laughing at how visibly excited Jack is. “This makes our morning worth it.”

Pacey turns to Joey while Jack and Jen bicker over cookies. “Have you been driving her crazy all day with those facts?”

“She gets her break now since you’re finally here,” she quips with a smile. “Did you know  _ cars  _ used to be able to drive through here?”

Pacey rolls his eyes, though secretly relieved to feel normal again. “No, I didn’t know that, Potter. You’ve outsmarted me about my own damn city.”

“It’s not hard to outsmart you in any capacity,” Joey teases. She’s about to go off with another fact from her long mental list, but she’s distracted by a sudden singing voice ringing through the park. “Oh my god, guys!” She whips her head around trying to locate where the sound is coming from, and finally spots the two buskers across the street.

She reaches for Pacey’s free hand, then motions for Jack and Jen to follow them as she leads them all towards the singers. The pair is going off on an acoustic rendition of Amy Winehouse’s Valerie, and Joey’s smile widens instantly. She looks through her jacket pockets to find any spare change, before she sadly remembers that all she took out were big bills for her travels and they had barely arrived. Joey pouts, looking over to Pacey standing beside her.

“We need to go somewhere that can give me change,” she whispers into his ear. 

Pacey is already digging into his pockets when Joey makes her request, having noticed her little search. “Here,” he hands her a few crumpled up dollar bills.

She chuckles as she takes his money, but doesn’t move yet. “You can do it, too,” she says as she tries to hand him half of the cash. 

He shakes his head, pulling his hand away. “I’ve done it a million times, Jo. Why do you think I had change ready? I’d say ask Jack but he’s preoccupied with those cookies. So, it’s all you.”

“Oh, right,” she says with a wince. She looks over to see Jack with a full mouth and chuckles. “Alright, then.” They’re into the second verse now, but Joey is still not moving. “Wait, do I have to wait until they finish the song?”

Pacey just shakes his head again, taking one last sip of his coffee to hide his pathetic smile. 

“God, why am I nervous? Okay.” Joey takes in a breath and goes up to the singing pair, making sure to make eye contact and give them a supportive smile as she drops the money into their open guitar case. 

The male singer winks at her as acknowledgment, and Joey tries not to look too flustered as she walks back to Pacey, who’s rolling his eyes yet again. 

“Cross another thing off your list?” he asks.

“Yep,” Joey answers with a grin. The song ends and she claps excitedly before turning back to her friends. “They were really good.”

Pacey just nods while Jen and Jack pretend they were even paying attention to anything but the cookies. “So, what’s the plan now?”

“I’m stuck chaperoning Jack on his Pizza Tour in the West Village,” Jen pouts, holding out the cookie box to Joey finally.

“ _ Stuck?!  _ You’re always saying how New York has the best pizza and now we get to spend two hours proving your point,” Jack exclaims, fully serious.

“Hold on,” Joey says as she takes the box of cookies. “We were allowed to book tours?!”

“We didn’t tell you that on purpose,” Pacey replies, causing Joey to gasp dramatically.

“Pacey can be your map,” Jen protests. “He’ll be better than whatever guide out there being paid minimum wage, who probably doesn’t even live here.”

“I’ve been on enough field trips to Manhattan to know what I’m talking about,” Pacey lies, knowing full well he never paid attention on any of those trips.

Joey finally takes a pick at a cookie, pouting as she takes a bite. “Remind me not to visit here with you people again.”

“Sorry we didn’t plan ahead enough, I’ve been busy planning a funeral,” Pacey deadpans, feeling the tone shift noticeably.

Joey almost chokes on her cookie, but manages to play it off. “Pace, I…”

“I was kidding, it’s fine. I keep forgetting this isn’t a joke to anyone but me,” Pacey explains, keeping his gaze off in the distance as he pretends to be focusing on something else. “Sorry.”

Joey is suddenly very interested in her shoes, and Jack and Jen have one of their wordless mind conversations.  _ Plan B was a good idea.  _ Clearly Pacey wasn’t doing as well as he was trying to act. 

“Don’t worry about it, Pace,” Jen assures him with a smile.

“Well, on another note,” Jack finally pipes up, breaking the awkward silence. “This gay man wants some big gay ice cream, please.”

Pacey lets out a light chuckle, wishing he didn’t feel so uncomfortable. Maybe he had to play a part around his friends for a while too. He nods his head to the side and turns away to lead his friends in the right direction to Big Gay Ice Cream Place ( _ Yes, Jo, that’s really it’s name _ ). “Hopefully the line won’t be too bad since it’s so early in the day.”

“Yeah, it should be fine,” Jen agrees before placing her hand on Joey’s back with a tip lipped smile. 

“Do we all get discounts since we’re gay?” Jack asks, and the four of them erupt into laughter.

Thankfully the  _ New Yorkers _ were right and the line up wasn’t so bad. They only had to wait about fifteen minutes, and by then they had eased back into their group back and forth, with Jen reminding Joey of some places she should try to visit and Jack agreeing to make a ranking list of the pizzas he ate to share with them all later. They all order single scoops, given that it’s still pretty chilly outside, except for Jack, of course, who goes for a double. Jen and Pacey agree to share one since he wasn’t hungry and she had to be prepared for all the pizza she was about to be forced to consume.

“Wait, no one take a bite yet!” Joey quickly warns them once Jack finally gets his cone. “We need our first group New York picture since we’re gonna be separated for the rest of the day.”

Pacey groans. “Why?”

“So we can hang it up in the loft!” she argues.

“Well, if we’re gonna hang it up it shouldn’t be a selfie,” Jen says, and then she instantly locks eyes with the redhead cashier behind the counter. Jen throws her a smile before taking Joey’s phone. “Hey, Natalie, is it?” she asks, pointing to the girl’s name tag. “Could you do my cute dorky friend a big favor and take a quick picture of us? She’s a tourist and it’s her first time in New York.”

Natalie instantly smiles, a slight blush on her cheeks. “Of course.”

“Thank you,” Jen says before turning back to her friends and giving them all a knowing wink. They all have to hold back their groans.

“Alright, say... gay!” Natalie instructs from behind the phone, and most of them laugh as they do as they’re told.

Jen takes the phone back with a smile and thanks Natalie once again before the four of them get lucky enough to find an empty table.

“Will we ever be able to go anywhere without you flirting with every cute girl you see?” Pacey questions Jen with a raised brow.

She simply shrugs, still smirking. “Hey, this is a gay ice cream shop. It’s literally expected.”

“Whatever you say, slut,” Jack shrugs, smiling teasingly, and Jen slaps his arm lightly.

They all say germs be damned and share a spoonful of each flavor with each other, taste testing and fighting over who got the best one until it’s agreed that the Salty Pimp is their best known cone for a reason.

“Alright, we need to go before we miss the tour,” Jack says as he gets up from his seat.

“Okay,” Joey gets up too, throwing her napkins away. “Don’t forget to text me pictures, okay?”

“We promise,” Jen assures her, giving her a hug. “Don’t let the subway rats get you.”

“Don’t be silly, Jen,” Pacey pauses dramatically before adding, “It’s the cockroaches she has to look out for.”

Joey rolls her eyes, trying not to let them get to her. Jack puts a supportive arm over her shoulder. “Jo, you’re fine.  _ I’m _ the one that will have to be on the lookout,” he says.

Jen raises her eyebrows. “From what?” 

“Four certain turtles who might try to steal my pizza,” he answers, completely serious, causing Joey and Jen to genuinely let out laughs.

Pacey sighs, “Joey, if you make any jokes as bad as that one I’m going to ‘accidentally’ lose you in Times Square.”

Joey throws Pacey an unimpressed look. “Well, good thing I already have a subway map, then,” she gloats, taking it out of her purse and showing it off. 

“Use your phone like a normal person, you grandma,” Pacey glances at Jen, “Why did we agree to this?”

“Because it beats spending time with your family,” Jen admits, repeating Pacey’s own words back to him. Pacey nods, pointing to her in agreement. 

* * *

“Okay,” Joey says as soon as they parted ways with Jack and Jen. “So, I have a list. We don’t have to do it all today, but just tell me what’s possible.” She pulls a piece of paper from her pocket and hands it to Pacey.

“At least tell me it’s color coded,” he teases before looking over the list. “Some of this could definitely work. But museums take a long time, so these can’t all stay. The Met works cause we’re meeting Jack and Jen right by it anyway. And before you ask, we can take  _ one  _ cab ride, because I’m sure that’s on your list and I know Jen would never get in a cab willingly. You brought hand sanitizer, right?” He asks, already knowing the answer to the question, but figuring he’d play into her little tourist game. 

Joey chuckles, knowing he was teasing, but still nodding. “Alright, so where to first?”

“The Strand is over that way, maybe a twenty minute walk.” Pacey explains, “Then we take a cab to the Empire State Building and decide where in Midtown you want to hit first.”

She can’t help but give a little excited hop before she motions for him to lead the way. “I’ll try my best to be cool, I promise.”

Pacey wants to hold her to her promise, but he can’t be bothered to stomp on her fun any more than he already has. Truthfully, it’s nice feeling like an expert on something, especially to Joey, who always seems to know more than him. Not to mention getting his mind off of why they were  _ really  _ in New York.

They get to The Strand in the twenty minutes promised, and Joey takes in a deep breath as she takes in her literal paradise. There’s so many books, she has to remind herself that she can’t possibly conquer it all in the hour Pacey’s letting her have in here, no matter how badly she wants to spend the rest of her life sorting through everything and reading it all. She decides to sift through as much as she can, her lifelong experience in libraries giving her an advantage, and she basically loses Pacey within five seconds as she goes off to fulfill her little nerd heart’s desires. She ends up buying two books, one she knows she’ll have to read for class, and an exclusive beautiful copy of  _ Little Women _ she’s been wanting for months. She’s so giddy, Pacey practically has to drag her out of there, promising her they’ll try to come by one more time before they leave. 

Pacey hails a cab expertly once they’re outside, and the two of them take it to the Empire State Building. Joey takes about a hundred pictures to send to Bessie, while also forcing Pacey to take pictures of her in front of it.

“Let’s go to the top! I want pictures of the skyline,” Joey pleads.

Pacey lets out a groan. “Potter, too much of being a tourist isn’t a good thing. The line up is super long and boring, and it’s way too expensive just so you can take a couple pictures of buildings while freezing up there.”

She pouts and puts on her best puppy dog eyes. “Please?”

“Look,  _ I _ haven’t even gone up there,” Pacey says, avoiding her eyes because he  _ knows _ what she’s doing.

“What?!” Joey exclaims dramatically. “You’re a fake New Yorker. I can’t believe I got stuck with you.”

“Actually, a fake New Yorker is whoever gets suckered into this tourist trap,” Pacey retorts easily. “Look, if you just wanna see buildings, you can do that somewhere else. The view from Top of the Rock is way less crowded for the exact same thing.”

“Really?”

“Hey, I’m your tour guide for a reason. Trust me on this.”

Joey lets out a sigh. “Fine. Alright, where to now, then?”

“Get that hand sanitizer out, cause we’re riding the subway.”

Joey has never actually been on a real subway like this. LA’s trains were always late and never dependable, so she usually just got a ride wherever she needed to go, and there obviously wasn’t anything like this back in Capeside. She follows the journey along on her physical copy of the subway map, despite Pacey rolling his eyes and assuring her he’d tell her when to get off. Right before their stop, the train halts at the station way more violently than it had before. She stumbles over her feet, not expecting it, and probably would have ended up falling on her face if Pacey’s quick reflexes hadn’t caught her. 

He chuckles as he helps her regain her balance. “Sorry, it does that.”

Joey puts a strand of hair behind her ear, trying to not look too embarrassed. “Thanks for the warning, Mr. Tour Guide.”

The two of them get out into Time Square, and Joey is so speechless Pacey has to remind her to keep walking before someone runs her over. She takes pictures of absolutely everything, forces Pacey to be in a selfie so she can send it to Jen and Jack, and then just stands there in the middle of it all, in complete awe of how everything is so big and bright, even in broad daylight. 

Pacey convinces her to keep going, seeing as they still have a lot to see and time keeps ticking. She obliges, following him around the Theatre District, then to Radio City, then 30 Rock across the street. Pacey had been right, of course. The view from up there was insanely beautiful, and there were way less people to fight over a good picture spot for. Her camera roll fills up even more, and she’s not even sorry for the way Jen’s poor phone was probably buzzing while she was trying to not throw up from all the pizza.

Her and Pacey decide to sit down and take a tiny break for a bit, finding some tables around 30 Rock to occupy. Joey’s phone buzzes in her pocket, and she quickly unlocks her phone expecting another selfie from Jen and Jack with their next pizza slice. She’s right, of course, but Jen sends another text, too.

**FROM: Jen** : you guys look super cute. the theatre district is one of my favorite parts of midtown! PS. ask pace about his high school show ;)

“No way,” Joey whispers under her breath, trying her best not to burst out laughing and ruin the moment. She locks her phone and looks back up at Pacey, trying her best to keep herself together. “Hey, Pace? Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, what’s up?” he asks, glancing at her obliviously.

“Why did you never tell me you were a theatre kid?” 

Pacey turns his head to look at her now, taking a long moment to think of all the ways that he would get Jen back for this. Since this  _ had  _ to be Jen’s fault. “Doing one show in high school for extra credit is different than being a theatre kid.”

“Who did you play?” Joey pokes further with a grin.

A groan escapes Pacey as he looks away from Joey, already blushing. “I was one of the guys in  _ Grease _ .”

Joey instantly lets out a gasp. “Which one?” It almost didn’t matter because she’s already about to lose it at the thought of high school Pacey in a leather jacket with gelled up hair, but she can’t help herself.

_ She’s really going to make him say it?  _ He mumbles, almost incoherently, “Kenickie.”

“ _ Oh my god _ ,” Joey says before breaking out into a fit of laughter. “ _ Please _ tell me you have pictures. Or videos! Even better.” She couldn’t believe this. She struck gold today. “Doesn’t matter, Jen probably does. God, I can’t believe she’s kept this from me this whole time!”

Pacey nods awkwardly, giving her time to process one of the most embarrassing things he ever had to do to pass a class in high school. “Gretchen and Jen got plenty of evidence, they came to all three performances.”

“God, I wish I’d been there to see it.” Joey is still trying to stop herself from laughing. “I mean, I know we would never have actually been friends in high school, but I would still give anything to experience that.”

“Why wouldn’t we be friends?” Pacey can’t help but ask, regretting it immediately. He adds quickly, “Too cool to be seen with a theatre kid, Potter?”

Joey chuckles humorlessly. “It’s the other way around and you know it. You wouldn’t be caught dead around the shy little straight-A nerd with a dead mom and a dad in prison. Not to mention a knocked up sister.”

Pacey sighs. “I know that I’m the coolest person currently in your social circle, but trust me, I was a loser in high school. I was the kid in oversized hand-me-downs, who was always in detention or the guidance counselors office, and Jen was my only friend.” Pacey’s smile fades as he adds, “And my dad was an asshole cop.”

Joey’s face falls a little as Pacey mentions his dad, but she clears her throat, determined not to let them get awkward again. “Alright, first of all, Audrey and Jen are tied for the coolest person in my life. Second of all, the only friend  _ I  _ had was Dawson Leery, so I think I beat you there. We would avoid so many parties just to sit in his room and watch stupid 80s movies and always skip over every sex scene that ever happened like some prudes.” She shakes her head at the memory, regretting every second she ever spent with that man. Then she confesses, gently, “I just don’t think you ever would have noticed me.”

There’s so many jokes Pacey wants to make. About  _ Audrey  _ being cooler than him (Jen he could stomach, but never Audrey). About Dawson’s pathetic existence. About skipping sex scenes in what he could only assume were PG-13 rated movies. But then she says he never would’ve noticed her and he doesn’t want to joke anymore.  _ I spent high school chasing pretty girls, I definitely would’ve noticed you.  _ But he settles for a sarcastic, “That’s just cause I never showed up to class.” 

She actually lets out a chuckle. “Right. Sure. Let’s overlook the fact that you couldn’t stand me the second I walked through the loft’s door for some reason, and I’d like to think I’m a lot less annoying now then I was then.”

Pacey keeps his eyes on Joey, unable to imagine a situation where Joey Potter wouldn’t have blown his mind in high school. He thinks about the person he used to be, and the person she is now. He thinks about the moment when she first walked into the loft, when he laid eyes on her and had to tell the voice in the back of his head to shut up. The voice that he was still struggling to ignore. If Pacey had met Joey in high school, he was absolutely sure that things would be very different today. In more ways than one. “I just don’t like new people coming into my space but I warmed up. I  _ definitely _ would’ve noticed you, Potter. And I would’ve been a terrible influence who dragged you to all those parties you avoided and made you watch movies from  _ this  _ century. Sex scenes and all.” He pauses as Joey laughs, before adding with a more playful tone, “And I would’ve learned way earlier on to have extra napkins for you when we watch those movies, because you  _ always  _ wipe your buttery fingers on your pants like a slob.”

Joey’s never really been one to be speechless. She’s kind of a blabber mouth, if she’s honest, always finding something new to rant about or a ridiculously pretentious tease to throw at most people who cross her path. But she’s never quite been stunned like this. Well, that was a lie now, because this was the third time in the last few months that Pacey Witter managed to do it. Suddenly overwhelmed, she looks down at her hands, twiddling her fingers awkwardly. She couldn’t hold his gaze right now, not when she knows what could happen if she did for too long. There was only so much she could take, and so much that she couldn’t do. “You notice that?” Joey finally asks, chuckling lightly. 

He simply shrugs, too wrapped up in his own exhausted thoughts to notice how thrown off Joey seems to be. “Yeah, it’s the one time that you’re more of a slob than I am, of course I notice.” Pacey laughs to himself as he harmlessly thinks about all the  _ Joey Quirks  _ that he’s picked up on and never put much thought into. All the hair tucking and neurotic hand gestures that had not gone unnoticed.

“Pace…” Joey is gentle now. Suddenly, it’s like they’re not even in a crowded park in one of the busiest cities in the world. Somehow, to her, right now, it’s just them. “Could I ask you something?”

Joey’s voice breaks him out of his thoughts about the way she twirls strands of her hair in her fingers while she reads a good book. He turns back to her and is just starting to nod when his phone starts vibrating in his pocket. He considers ignoring it, in case it’s Doug or even Gretchen, but he decides to check anyway.  _ Adam.  _ He straightens up slightly. “Sorry, one sec,” Pacey clears his throat and answers the call, glancing at the crowds of people walking around as he does. “Hey Adam.”

Joey waves him off, letting him know it’s okay, and then has to sit there pretending that there isn’t uncontrollable pounding going on in her chest. Then she hears who called and she can’t help the dry laughter that escapes her mouth. The universe sure is hilarious when it wants to be. It seems like every time Joey is just about to crack, ready to do something stupid and confront her feelings, something has to remind her, again and again, that she  _ can’t _ . That she’s too late, or too stupid to realize that it would all lead to nothing but chaos. She doesn’t know if she should be incredibly angry or deeply grateful. She can’t help herself from glancing over at Pacey, smiling as he answers some question his boyfriend is asking him through the phone. _ He’s happy, Joey. Why do you want to ruin that so badly?  _ She forces herself to look away, to take in the scenery around them instead and try to gather herself again before Pacey catches on and notices she’s off, since apparently he’s good at reading her when she isn’t looking. 

For some reason, Pacey stands up and starts stretching his arms after a moment, still smiling as Adam asks about his night.  _ Shit. He was supposed to call Adam last night.  _ “I’m so sorry I didn’t call last night, things got really weird. Yeah, Doug  _ hugged me,  _ a lot. No passive aggressive comments yet, but there’s still time.” He pauses, smiling to himself as Adam jokes about hopping on a plane to come defend Pacey’s honor.  _ What did Pacey do to deserve him?  _ “Don’t worry, Jen, Jack, and Joey gave me a reason to leave the house.” Pacey glances down at Joey and mouths  _ “Sorry,”  _ before adding out loud, “I’ll send you some pictures, yeah? Oh god, you’re a museum person too? I don’t get the appeal, you can see all those pictures online. Fine, fine, I’ll take plenty of pictures of the framed pictures. Yeah, okay. Bye.” Pacey laughs before hanging up the phone. He glances down at Joey again, feeling flustered for some reason. “Sorry, Jo… What were you saying?”

She instantly shakes her head. It seemed so dumb to ask such a thing now. “Do you think we could…”  _ have dated in high school? _ “Grab a New York hot dog right now?” She asks instead, throwing him her best smile.

Pacey lets out an excited gasp. “Oh, you read my mind. I’m starving. Come on, we passed a cart on the corner.”

* * *

At the end of their long day, they finally meet up with Jack and Jen outside the Met, and Joey convinces everyone to go inside to look at some art and cross another thing off her list. 

“Look,” she turns to Jack and Jen. “You guys could use the walk to burn off all the pizza you ate. Plus you can pretend like you’re those trendy hipster gays you’re always making fun of from back home.”

Jack smiles. “Put my acting to the test. Alright, I’m in.”

“Anything for you, Jo,” Jen agrees. 

She looks over to Pacey, already prepared to pout.

“I’m going,” he tells her before she has a chance to open her mouth. “I promised Adam I’d send pictures.”

“Right,” Joey says with a nod. “Great, then.” She goes over to buy them the tickets in order to busy herself and keep her from her thoughts. 

Once inside, the four of them try to stay together, only separating when looking at different art pieces in each exhibit. Jen comes up beside Joey while she’s looking at Van Gogh’s  _ Irises _ , completely in awe of the fact that it’s even in front of her right now. 

“Hey,” Jen says, bumping her shoulder lightly. “How was your tourist field trip? I can’t believe you got Pacey to take so many selfies.”

Joey smiles, taking her eyes away from the painting for a moment to acknowledge her friend properly. “It was fun! This city is insane. There’s so much to do here, I can’t believe it.”

“Yeah. I’ve lived here all my life and still only have half the list completed,” Jen agrees. “This is my first time coming in here, though, so thanks for another checkmark.”

“You’re very welcome. How was your pizza?”

“Oily and disgusting, and  _ so  _ much better than LA pizza.” The two of them share a smile, and then stand in silence for a bit. “Is he doing okay?”

Joey doesn’t need to confirm who  _ he  _ is. She sighs. “I mean, I wanna say yes, because despite the incessant eye rolling and endless groaning, he did seem like he was having some fun with me. But that’s today.”

“And tomorrow is what we’re really worried about,” Jen says, reading Joey’s mind. “Well, at least we gave him a good day before all possible hell breaks loose.” Jen grabs Joey’s hand and gives it a supportive squeeze. “Thanks, Jo.”

“I didn’t do anything. I just dragged him around all day doing things he didn’t wanna do to see places he’s seen a million times before,” she says with a shrug.

“I don’t know how you don’t know this, Joey, but the keyword in that was that  _ you _ did it.”

Joey raises her eyebrow at the blonde. “So? He would’ve done it for any of you.”

“You were  _ Plan B _ for a reason,” her friend reminds her. “I don’t know if you noticed, but he was off when he got there this morning. I texted Gretchen and… Well, let’s just say that we were right about assuming that this wouldn’t be easy for Pacey.” Jen looks over to find him smiling at something stupid Jack was saying about a nude sculpture they were standing in front of. “I don’t think any of us can get him out of a funk like you can.”

Joey smiles at the sight of her boys being stupid, then can’t help but linger on Pacey’s face. “Well, it’s mutual,” she whispers. Then, before Jen can question her for it, she’s quick to say, “By the way ---  _ Keneckie in Grease _ ? You're showing me every single video the second we get home.”

Jen bursts into laughter, which gets a few annoyed glares from the adults around them. But, of course, she doesn’t care. “Oh, you got it.”

* * *

Hours later, Pacey sits on the floor of his childhood bedroom, his back against the bunk-bed that he slept in for the first eighteen years of his life. There isn’t much in the room that would tell you it was ever Pacey’s, which made sense since this was his niece’s bedroom now. The faded blue walls had been painted over and covered up with new posters of cartoons Pacey didn’t recognize. His eyes trace over the room slowly, waiting for some kind of comforting feeling to wash over him. It doesn’t. It’s just another room now. 

He tosses the warm bag of frozen peas on the floor beside him and touches his lip carefully to see if the bleeding has stopped. It has, but the contact causes a sharp pain to shoot through his mouth. Pacey curses under his breath, he hadn't had to deal with a busted lip in years. As if on cue, Gretchen slips into the room and sits next to him on the floor, holding out a packaged popsicle. “There aren’t any more bags of vegetables.”

“Thanks,” Pacey mumbles, wincing as he brings the cold treat to his fat lip. “You didn’t have to break us up, you know, I wasn’t going to fight back anymore.”

Gretchen looks over at her brother, and he pretends not to notice how puffy her eyes are. “You fooled me, since, y’know, you punched him.”

“I know, but I wasn’t going to hit him  _ again, _ ” Pacey shrugs, doing his best not to think about how his mom looked at him when he’d hit his older brother.  _ How was  _ he  _ the bad guy when Doug hit him first?  _

“Yeah, but… I’m not sure that Doug was done,” Gretchen admits, her voice breaking. She’d seen worse fights between her family members, always involving Pacey. But it had been years, and she thought that part of their lives was over. The hiding in Pacey’s room with him and being the only one in their house who cared how he was; always being the one to go after him when he ran away. She thought things would’ve changed by now. “Maybe you should go to Grams’ for the night.”

“No,” Pacey answers too quickly, “I have to finish cleaning out the garage for mom.”

“You don’t have to do anything, Pace,” Gretchen sighs, leaning to the side to catch his eye. “You have nothing to prove to them. You’ve done more than enough.”

Pacey clenches his jaw, cursing the tear that falls down his face. “I’ve done everything they’ve asked of me all week. I’ve kept my mouth shut and kept my head down and worked my ass off. And Doug still picked a fight with me. And mom still took his side. Nothing’s any different than it was five years ago.” 

“I’m sorry, Pace,” Gretchen rests her head on Pacey’s shoulder. “But plenty of things are different. We live across the country and only have to deal with them once or twice a year, we have solid jobs, and great friends. You have a very handsome boyfriend.”

“Yeah, I do,” Pacey smiles, laying his head on Gretchen’s as he lowers the popsicle from his face. “You get why I didn’t bring him, right? Can you imagine if he had to see all this?”

“I understand. But if you plan on keeping him around, he’s going to meet them eventually. It’s the burden that we have to bear as the normal ones in the family.”

Pacey bites the inside of his cheek, thinking about how great Adam’s been through all of this. And he does feel guilty for pushing him away the last few days, but he can’t help but worry. “What if he takes one look at this part of me and leaves?”

Gretchen lifts her head and turns to face Pacey completely, her brow furrowed in that classic Witter way. “Then he doesn’t deserve you. If he can’t see what an amazing person you are in spite of the people who raised you, then it’s his loss.” She shrugs easily, and Pacey hates how sure she sounds.  _ How does she do that?  _ “You had the same fear about Andie, remember?”

Laughing in spite of himself, Pacey remembers the last time he’d visited home: It was to introduce everyone to Andie. After months of Andie’s persistent pleading, she finally got through to him. It was for his parent’s anniversary dinner that Doug threw for them, and it went terribly. His parents fought during dinner, Kerry’s kids knocked over a bottle of champagne, and the night ended with everyone grilling Pacey about not making as much money as Doug. Yet somehow, Andie wasn’t phased. “Yeah, I did. But, in my defense most people aren’t as understanding as Andie McPhee.”

Gretchen laughs too, nodding. “She sent us flowers.”

Pacey closes his eyes, smiling fondly. “Of course, she did.”

“Yeah, mom’s decided that she likes Andie now and will probably be telling you to get back together with her at some point,” Gretchen laughs quietly.

“Leave it to mom to wait until two years after we break up to actually like someone I bring home.”

Gretchen laughs, and then her face falls slightly. “God, remember how much Dad liked her?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I do,” Pacey nods slightly, averting his eyes to his lap.  _ More than he ever liked me. _

* * *

The next day comes faster than any of them want. Joey had practically passed out as soon as she hit the bed, tired from all the walking around the city and the excitement it brought her. Breakfast in the morning is lively, like it’s just another day, but as soon as all of them are changed and ready to go, there is a noticeable mood drop between them all. It was a little weird for Joey, to be going to the funeral of a man she never even met and only heard awful things about, but if Pacey wanted her, she’d be there. 

They get to the church and Grams quickly goes to give the whole Witter family tight hugs. Jen instructs Jack and Joey to get them seats and then plays her part, wishing condolences to the people she can’t stand. Secretly, Joey is grateful she isn’t meeting any of the Witters just yet. 

As soon as she’s seated, Joey looks around to see if she can find Pacey, but isn’t able to see him anywhere. She notices Jack doing the same thing, and they both lock eyes and wordlessly communicate with each other:  _ Where is he?  _ Joey can only hope he’s in the back preparing something, or maybe in the bathroom. 

She looks back to see Gretchen and Jen away from the rest of the family, and Gretchen looks visibly distressed as she says something. Joey instantly feels anxious, and her heart only pounds harder as she watches Jen approach them with a worried look on her face. 

“Come with me,” she whispers, and Joey and Jack follow her orders as she takes them outside into the hall. 

“Jen, what’s going on? Where’s Pacey?” Joey instantly asks.

“I have no idea. Gretchen says he stepped outside for fresh air almost a half hour ago and he still hasn’t come back,” Jen answers, running an anxious hand through her hair.

“Shit,” Jack says, instantly beginning to look around. “Do you think he ran?”

“I don’t know, Gretchen said he and Doug got in a big fight last night. And then he acted like everything was completely normal the rest of the night. Which doesn’t sound like Pacey.”

Joey shakes her head, exasperated. She knew what it was like to deal with the stress of a funeral, and it definitely wouldn’t help to have a big fight right before. She would know --- She and Bessie got in an argument the night before her mom’s funeral, too. But her and Bessie weren’t Witters; they made up a few hours later. “I know this is probably hopeless, but I’ll try calling him,” she says as she takes out her phone. 

“I’ll go look outside,” Jack announces, but Jen stops him before he can reach the door.

“Don’t. It’s okay, I know how to find him,” she tells them.

Jen pulls out her own phone, and Joey and Jack look over her shoulders as they watch her pull up Find My Friends.

“I thought Pacey didn’t have that,” Jack questions.

Jen scoffs. “Please. You think I’d allow that?” She clicks on Pacey’s name and waits for his location to show. “I’ve known Pacey long enough. This is necessary.”

Finally, the app shows them a bright green dot. 

“Okay, this says he’s down the street,” Joey points out.

“Saving on cab fare, at least,” Jack mumbles as he opens the door for the girls to go through. 

Sure enough, they find Pacey sitting on a bench in his suit, his tie undone and next to him. He lifts a brown-bagged bottle to his lips absently, wincing slightly as it makes contact with his bruised cheek and busted lip.

“Pacey?” Jen’s voice is so gentle that Pacey almost doesn’t hear her. He lifts his gaze to his friends with a sigh.

He should’ve left his phone with Gretchen, he knew that. He knew Jen kept redownloading Find My Friends on his phone when he wasn’t looking. He just hadn’t thought that far ahead when he left. First it was just a breath of fresh air. Then, it was a cup of coffee. And then he saw the liquor store and he figured the best way to spend his father’s funeral was how his father spent most of his life: drunk. But he wasn’t quite drunk yet, unfortunately. “Jennifer.”

Jack sits down next to Pacey without a word, picking up his discarded tie and folding it neatly in his lap, while Joey simply stays standing, arms wrapped around herself from the cold. Jen smiles sadly at him, and all Pacey sees is the scrawny twelve year old he met on the first day of school. With her messy blonde pixie cut and resting bitch face, Pacey never would’ve expected her to be the one to save him from his family. One stray helping another, it was almost poetic.  _ How many times had he run away from home to stay at Jen’s?  _ Enough times that Grams’ spare bedroom used to be stocked with clothes and a toothbrush just in case. Almost ten years of Jen coming to his rescue and not even his dad’s death could change that. Finally, Jen speaks. “Do you have enough to share with the class? I don’t think it’s helping your bruise there.” She wants to say more and make sure he’s okay, but she holds back.

“It’s helping numb the pain.” Pacey takes another sip before holding the bottle out to Jen. “How worried is Gretchen?”

“Very,” Jen replies, taking the bottle from him. “Your mom too.”

Now Pacey laughs, but not his typical warm laugh. His expression is still blank as he mutters, “My mom doesn’t care where I am, but thanks for trying. Your optimism is endearing.”

“We have to go back, Pace,” Jack speaks up, throwing his friend a sad look.

“I’m not going. You guys enjoy the charade, but I’m not sitting through that bullshit. Not today.” Pacey shakes his head before reaching for the bottle in Jen’s hands. She pulls the bottle away from him ever so slightly and Pacey gives her the dirtiest look he can muster while so exhausted. 

“You don’t need any more. You have  _ us _ , just talk to us,” Jen pleads quietly, her tone never hardening. 

Pacey sighs, glancing at Jack and Joey for any sign of disagreement with what Jen was saying, to no avail. He leans forward and takes the bottle from Jen, earning him a disappointed sigh from the blonde. “I don’t want to talk about it. The more I talk about it, the worse it gets. I can’t go back.”

“Pacey, I get it,” Joey finally speaks, taking a step forward so he can hear her better. “Trust me, I do. But you have to do this.” 

“I don’t  _ have  _ to do anything, Joey. I’ve done enough,” he echoes his sister’s words from the night before. “I've spent twenty one years being the bigger person while my own father chose to do nothing. You  _ don’t _ get it, and that’s fine. Trust me, I’d hate it if you understood what I’m feeling right now but  _ please,  _ leave me alone.” Pacey can’t even look at Joey. Instead he focuses his gaze on the bottle in his hands. 

“Look,” Jen says, her voice still gentle but a little more exasperated. “ _ That man _ was not a good person. We both know that, Pacey, you better than anyone. And I’m sorry that you do. But you helped put this whole thing together, and we all came here to support you --”

“Yeah, but I didn’t  _ ask _ you to come here, did I?” Pacey asks abruptly, spitting the words out hastily. “You all just decided that this is what I wanted. But, I didn’t  _ want  _ eyes on me while I went through one of the worst weekends of my life. I don’t even like attention on something as meaningless as my birthday and you assumed I needed babysitters at my father’s funeral?!” Pacey scoffs, narrowing his eyes at Jen now. “If you care so much about this fucking funeral, then just  _ go to it. _ ”

Jen looks visibly upset now, staring down at her fingers sadly. “I  _ assumed  _ you might want me here, Pacey. Gretchen told me about what happened last night… I’m trying to be here for you. That’s what we do. It’s what we’ve always done.” 

“Yeah, I definitely want you here so I can watch you and my sister tip-toe around each other because of the mess  _ you made _ the second I wasn't here to stop you,” Pacey retorts, taking a swig of his whiskey. 

Jack stiffens next to Pacey, his eyes meeting Joey’s nervously before he watches Jen in silence. The blonde sucks in a breath, visibly surprised by the low blow. “Wow,” is all she can muster for a good second. She finally looks back at him, trying her best not to cry. “Well, I’m sorry that I don’t know you as well as I thought I did, Pacey.” She instantly turns and walks away, not uttering another word.

Jack instantly gets up from his seat. “Joey?” he asks quietly. 

“Yup, go,” she assures him, taking Pacey’s tie from his hand with a knowing nod. 

Jack runs off after his best friend, not giving Pacey a second glance. Pacey just sighs, putting the bottle down and pressing his hands to his face. 

Joey takes the seat beside him that Jack was occupying a few seconds ago, wrapping her coat tighter around her as she does. She lets Pacey wallow for a moment and carefully considers her next words. 

“That wasn’t called for,” she tells him, keeping her eyes on the horizon.

“Say hello to high school Pacey. Busted lip and all,” he grumbles, his words stringing together carelessly. 

Joey turns to him, finally really looking at the bruised lip. It seems like the fight that Jen had told her happened between Pacey and Doug last night escalated much more than she thought. Joey couldn’t wrap her mind around it. Sure, siblings can get annoying and overbearing and completely irrational, but not once did she and Bessie ever let themselves get carried out to that degree. She was lucky, she knew that. Her heart aches, suddenly, wanting to do something that could make all of this go away for Pacey, because she’s never seen him like this and she hates it. But she sucks in a deep breath and refocuses herself. “Does that hurt? I always carry some first-aid stuff in my bag if you want it.” She regrets asking it, because what the hell is she gonna do if she has to touch his  _ lips _ ? But it was too late to take it back now.

Pacey shakes his head, eyes still forward, not focusing on anything in particular. “Gretchen cleaned me up last night,” he says to her relief, “Just needs a few days to heal.” 

“Alright,” Joey replies with a shrug, and then focuses her eyes back onto the cloudy skies in front of them. It really is strange, she thinks, how the weather never seems to be sunny when there’s a funeral in her life. She stays silent, both because she knows it’s what Pacey wants, and because she’s not sure what to say. She saw how he went off on Jen, and she knows he needs a moment to process and calm down again. Plus, she’s hoping her mere presence might annoy him so much he’ll want to get up and go back despite his best wishes. 

Trying to focus on the light feeling of being tipsy, Pacey sits back and takes a deep breath, but his mind jumps to the night before. The instant confrontation he faced when he got home from his day out with his friends. It was sad that arguing made that house feel more like home than anything else they did. All that had been missing was his dad putting the fight to rest with some heartless insult that made Pacey want to disappear completely. Pacey closes his eyes tightly and tries not to think about it. He thinks about the look on Jen’s face before she had walked away from him. He thinks about how disappointed Gretchen will be when she sees Jack and Jen return without him. Before his mind can jump to something else to be miserable about, Pacey opens his mouth, “Did you meet any of them before you came looking for me?”

Joey would have been startled by his sudden question if it weren’t for the softness in his voice. She adjusts herself slightly, not looking at him just yet. “We barely sat down before Gretchen pulled Jen aside and told us to look for you. So, no.”

“Well, hey,” He glances at Joey, his tone eerily hollow as opposed to his normal playfulness, “If you stay here with me the whole time and miss the funeral completely, then you won’t have to meet them. That way they can’t ruin your trip.” He isn’t sure why he says it. It’s a pathetic attempt to feel normal. Maybe if they can just skip right to joking about how bad this is, he won’t have to feel so exposed. Maybe she’ll just understand that he can’t help who he turns into around his family and it won’t make her look at him differently.  _ Maybe she won’t see all the cracks.  _ Maybe he can salvage this. 

Joey finally turns her head to catch his eye. She’d been avoiding doing it because she knows what she’ll see, and she doesn’t think she’s the right person to deal with any of it. She has no idea why Jen and Jack were always so insistent about her being a  _ secret weapon _ when it comes to Pacey, because whenever she’s around him she actually feels completely helpless. The bickering, the back and forth, it was all just walls they both put up. Leaving them alone never actually ended well, when she thinks back on it. Their almost kiss, the punch outside the bar… She almost feared that she actually always ended up making Pacey’s life  _ worse _ than when she met him. 

She lets out a deep sigh, closing her eyes for a second. She wishes she could just suck all the sadness out of him, like some alien version of osmosis. When Pacey had briefly told her about his parents on Christmas Eve, she never thought they would have to dive deeper into it so soon and so quickly. She leans herself back onto the bench, trying her best to blink away any tears that brimmed her eyes, hoping she can blame it on the wind if Pacey notices. “Is that what you want? We can sit here forever if you need it.” She pauses for a second, not wanting to say the next part, but something inside her was telling her she should. “But it won’t change anything, Pacey. I wish it could, but it won’t.”

God, Pacey wants to sit here with Joey forever. He wants to ask her about the books she studied so closely at The Strand and what part of the city she wanted to explore next. He wants to tell her about how beautiful New York is during the holiday season, and how even someone as grumpy as him could still love it so much. Pacey wants to talk about anything but himself and his depressing past. But, she’s right.  _ Isn’t she always?  _ He could sit here and stall as much as he wants, but he’ll have to face his mom eventually, and Doug and Kerry. And Gretchen. And Jack and Grams. And Jen. And Joey, too. He can’t put her through this and not even try to explain himself. 

“Accepting that some things don’t change was always my problem. As a kid, I mean. And now, too...” He actually looks up at her as he continues, “I always thought that one day I’d grow into a person that my family could get along with. Or maybe even  _ like _ . My dad always asked me when I was going to grow up and I thought it would just happen one day. I thought I’d outgrow being the black sheep, and I got my hopes up every fucking time I started to feel good about myself. And it was never any different. Not even a little bit. Not even now.”

Pacey takes a second, running a hand over his face to try and wipe away any tears that have fallen. He tries his hardest not to sound as bitter as he feels, but he fails, “I’m going to spend the rest of my life growing and wondering if  _ this  _ is the version of me he would’ve accepted. Even though I hate him, I’ll always wonder. It’ll drive me crazy that he still has that power over me. And It sucks knowing that I’m gonna have to deal with  _ his  _ baggage for the rest of my life. All because he couldn't just do his job and  _ love me. _ ” His voice cracks as he stares down at the street in front of him. 

Joey just sits there in stunned silence. She had let Pacey see a lot of her worst lows --- well, maybe  _ let _ is an overstatement, he just always seemed to be there when it happened --- but she never thought she’d be able to break through him like this. She thought it was all locked away, with only Jen having the full knowledge of it. Her and Pacey were only roommates after all. Friends, if you squinted. But now he was crying in front of her, something she never thought she’d see him do unless it was for one of those shitty reality TV shows he watched when he thought everyone was asleep. She thinks back to how she was when her mom died, and she gets it. She really, truly gets it. There’s a part of Pacey that‘s gone now, and even if it was a part he never liked, that shit still stung. And it would forever. She was living proof of that. 

She nods gently, hoping he understands it as a gesture of needing a second to take it all in. Then, silently, Joey simply puts a supportive hand on his back. She caresses him softly, trying to figure out what she could possibly say. She’s terrified right now, if she’s honest. It feels like Pacey just put his beating heart in her hands, and she was scared that if she made a wrong move and dropped it, it would shatter like glass right in front of her. But if there was one thing she learned when she had to deal with her own loss, it was that you don’t get better unless you have hands to help you through it. And you can swat them away and stubbornly convince yourself you don’t need them, but you will. And he needed her.

Finally, Joey speaks up, her voice gentle. “I don’t have the best opinion of  _ my _ dad. But my mom loved him. And for some reason that makes me sad, that the best woman I’ve ever known really loved that man. I don’t know why, and I never will. I can’t exactly ask her,” she says dryly, looking up at the sky almost subconsciously. She clears her throat before continuing, “I haven’t talked to my dad in… five years? Probably more. I never really know what to say to him, because honestly, Pacey? I hate his guts. I hate that he did this to us, and I hate that he’s never been around. Which is hilarious, because right now he’s in jail  _ because _ of me. Did you know that? I wore a wire and got him to confess. I put him in there for the second time when I was fifteen.” She sighs, shaking her head before she gets too carried away. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to just dump this all on you, and I’m not trying to make this a competition, because I know that’s against your  _ code _ . I just…” She trails off, trying to find the right words. “I just want you to know that if things were reversed and this were happening to me, you would be having to drag me into that church, too.”

It’s sad that Joey talking about her own fucked up family is the only reason that Pacey has the strength to look at her. And it’s depressing how  _ comforting  _ it is.  _ Leave it to Joey Potter to respond to his emotional rambling with her own without making it feel like a competition.  _ He wipes at the tears on his face again as he studies her expression. Pacey hates seeing her like this, even if opening up to her was easier because of it. He wants to know exactly what to say, and what to do. He still feels uncomfortable about how much he’d just admitted out loud for the very first time, so he focuses on Joey instead. “It’s not a competition. But if it were… I guess you'd win.”

Joey instantly shakes her head. “I win by having you in my life.” It slips out of her, and she has to scramble to not leave it like that.  _ Don’t make this complicated.  _ “And Jen, and Jack, and Audrey,” she adds quickly. “I don’t need him. I have all of you.”

Pacey mimics her by shaking his own head before adding quietly, “ _ He's _ missing out. It’s important that you know that,” and he can’t help but think back to Christmas. When Joey had said the same words to him about his parents being so distant. Thinking back to that quiet night in the loft with Joey, eating leftovers and swapping misfortunes with ease, makes Pacey miss her in an odd way. She hadn’t gone anywhere, but things were so different now.  _ He  _ feels so different now. And that thought scares him so much that he stands up. “How about this, when the time comes and you’re in my position… Let me be the one who swoops in and saves the day, okay?”

Joey watches him stand with raised brows, not having expected it. At his words, she can’t help the smile that slips out, despite the actual sadness of what he’s saying. “I’d be honored, Pace.” She looks up at him, eyes genuine. “Why’d you stand up?” she asks a little teasingly, hoping his answer is what she wanted to hear. “Don’t tell me the five sips you took of your drink already got to your bladder.”

“Nope,” Pacey mumbles before reaching down to take his dress tie from her. He stands up straight and holds the tie out. “I’m hoping you can tie this quicker than I can change my mind. Because those five sips are starting to wear off.” 

_ God, did she actually do it? _ Joey’s smile widens as she stands up, taking the tie from him with teasingly disappointed tsks. “You really need to learn how to do this,” she says as she straightens it out in her hands. 

“And you need to stop smiling so wide or my stubbornness will win out and I’ll start running  _ away _ from the church,” Pacey mutters to himself as he takes a deep breath in and lifts his collar up for her. He tries not to think about where they’re going. Instead, he just keeps thinking about Christmas. Just him and Joey eating Chinese takeout in their dimly-lit kitchen. 

She gets to work doing what he asked of her, gently putting the tie around his neck and trying her best not to think about how close they were standing to each other. It wasn’t the time for her to get caught up in all the stupid complications of feelings she couldn’t understand. So she simply focuses on the tie, doing the knot as best as she could and hoping that there wasn’t a noticeable blush in her cheeks. She makes sure not to choke him as she tightens it, straightens it out as perfectly as she can, and then puts his collar back down for him. “There you go, Mr. Witter,” she teases, daring herself to catch his gaze and being surprised when she finds that he was already looking at her. “All done.” 

Pacey doesn’t smile at how focused Joey is on tying his tie, but he  _ wants  _ to. And that’s enough for him on a day like this. He stares back at her for a moment too long before stepping forward and finally hugging Joey tightly. Pacey wraps his arms around her and can’t help but drop his chin down to rest on her shoulder. It’s the closest thing to a  _ thank you _ he can muster up right now. He knows it’s not enough, but he hopes Joey knows it’s the best he can do. 

_ He’s never hugged me before _ , is the first thought that comes into Joey’s mind, and it engulfs her so much that she has to snap herself back into reality to actually hug him back. Her arms squeeze his body tighter, and she closes her eyes as she leans into his chest. There’s still so much she wants to say to him, but words are so complicated when you feel so much for a person. So a hug will do for now. She actually wants to beat herself up for not doing it sooner. Purely for the reason that he’s dealing with so much right now, and absolutely nothing else. 

She’s not gonna pull away first. She’ll stay there as long as he needs her.

After a long moment, Pacey lifts his head slightly, giving Joey one last squeeze before letting her go. His eyes trace over her face for a moment before nodding to himself nervously, “Okay,” he mumbles as he really steps away and bends down to grab the whiskey bottle. He takes a quick swig, twisting his expression slightly.  _ This is going to be horrible.  _ Then Pacey looks at Joey again and takes a deep breath, holding the bottle out to her in a silent offer. 

Joey chuckles, taking the bottle with a sad smile. “My payment for the tie, huh?”

“Don’t tell Jack, he’s been tying mine for free,” Pacey replies almost robotically. His brain was busy thinking about what he was about to put himself through. 

She toasts the drink childishly before bringing the bottle to her lips, but she barely gets any of it down her throat. “God, what the hell are you drinking?” she asks, sticking her tongue out and scrunching her nose. “That was gross, Pacey. Blegh.”

* * *

The ceremony drags, and Pacey considers stepping outside to dig through the garbage can that Joey threw his whiskey bottle into. Just to pass the time. He and Joey are standing at the back of the church anyway, since every seat was already filled with a goddamn cop, so it would be  _ so easy _ to slip out. But, he stands still and just hopes that Joey can’t hear his heart beating out of his chest. For a while, he stares at the back of Gretchen’s head and drowns out what the priest is saying. And when one of his dad’s old co-workers makes a speech, he sees Jen turn around and notice him and Joey in the back. He can’t read her expression, but his heart sinks. And then Doug stands up and walks over to the microphone, and Pacey unintentionally clenches his fists at his sides. 

Joey’s trying to be respectful and listen to everyone on the podium, but to be honest, it’s hard to care when she’s never met the man, and when just twenty minutes ago, his son cried to her about how fucked up he made him. So, and forgive her for thinking this in literal church, she doesn’t really think this man is anywhere  _ upwards _ of them right now. She sighs as she sees Doug go up, and knowing that that was the man that bruised Pacey’s lip, she instantly tunes him out. Out of the corner of her eye, she notices Pacey stiffening up at the sight of his older brother, and then looks down to find his hands in fists. Joey sighs sadly, not knowing what she could do to ease him up. They just needed to get through another twenty minutes.  _ You can do this,  _ she wants to say, but her mouth feels dry and the social setting keeps her quiet.

So instead, she does the only thing she can think of: she slightly bumps her hand against his fist to get his attention, hoping it’ll make him lock eyes with her. But, he doesn’t look at her. Instead, Joey just feels Pacey’s hand take hold of hers tightly. And after a short moment, she sees him steal a glance down at their hands before letting out a deep breath and standing just a little bit taller.

Joey has to try really hard not to smile at a funeral.

* * *

Three hours or so later, Joey honestly has no idea what she’s still doing at the Witter home. She had barely spoken with a single one of them, except for the quick introductions and meaningless small talk that Grams put her through with them. She’d like to keep it that way. Well, except when it came to Gretchen, who had just come up to her and pulled her aside so they could have a moment alone.

Before Joey can even properly greet her, Gretchen’s arms have wrapped around her. “Hi to you, too,” Joey tries to say.

“Thank you,” Gretchen practically interrupts her, “For bringing Pacey back. When Jen came back without him, I thought… I don’t know what you said to him, but I’m so glad you’re here.”

Joey smiles softly as she pulls away. “I’m not sure what I did either, but I’m glad it worked.” She shrugs, a little awkward at the thought of being any kind of savior. “It really was nothing.”

“It’s not nothing,” Gretchen insists, “Joey, he may not say it, because he’s… well, he’s  _ Pacey.  _ But, he’s glad you’re here. And one day, he’ll be able to thank you for what you did today. So until he does, I will.  _ Thank you. _ ”

Stunned, Joey simply blinks for a few seconds, which is definitely the only reason why her eyes get a little wet. “Oh, wow. Um, thanks, Gretchen. Uh, I mean --- You’re welcome,” she chuckles a little. “ _ And _ thank you. I’m just… really sorry about everything, and I’m glad I could be here for you guys.”

Gretchen gives her a sad smile and touches her arm once more before excusing herself to join the rest of her family. As Joey watches her leave, she looks across the room to see all three of her roommates awkwardly standing in silence. She locks eyes with Jack, who instantly makes up a dumb excuse and practically runs towards her before she even catches on to what he’s doing.

“Quick, pretend like we’re talking,” Jack says as soon as he’s close enough to her.

“We  _ are  _ talking,” Joey teases. “What’s going on?”

“Those two  _ need  _ to make up before I pull all my hair out, Jo. They’re being stupid. And now they’ll have no excuse, because both of them are too stubborn to leave first.”

Joey raises an eyebrow. “Don’t know how I feel about your method, but I stand behind the goal.”

“Please talk like a normal person, otherwise it’s hard to fake a conversation with you,” Jack quips, reaching beside her for a handful of the leftover crackers.

Joey rolls her eyes, knowing he’s just saying it to be annoying. “You literally wanna be a teacher. Anyways, whatever you do, don’t turn around, because those two  _ despise  _ you right now,” she warns.

She’s not exaggerating. Pacey and Jen are both staring daggers at Jack from their place by the stairs, away from most of the commotion. The house is full of mostly cops and blood-relatives of Pacey’s, so he’s content with staying away from the action. He glances at Jen, who’s definitely trying to send some kind of angry message to Jack in her mind. Pacey sighs, speaking quietly, “I’m really sorry, Jen.”

“It’s fine, Pacey. Today was never going to be easy, we’ve never been through anything like this,” Jen shrugs, her tone flat. She’s not trying to make him feel bad, she’s actually trying  _ really hard  _ to seem fine. 

“I’ve been an asshole to you all week, and I’m sorry. I could give you a bunch of excuses, but I won’t waste your time because it doesn’t make what I said today any less shitty.” Pacey sighs before assuring her, “I’m not mad at you about Gretchen.”

Jen looks up at Pacey, surprised at such a quick turnaround. “What  _ are  _ you mad at me about? Because you’ve got me stumped.”

Pacey shakes his head. “I’m  _ not  _ mad at you.. I just… You know me  _ so well _ . And being held accountable for my actions has never been something I take kindly to. Which is  _ not  _ an excuse. And from now on, if I get mad at you for looking out for me then I’ll put any cash in my wallet in the Dumbass Jar.”

Jen rolls her eyes. “Your wallet is always empty.”

“I’ll venmo you twenty bucks, then. Every time.” Pacey attempts a smile but just ends up pressing his lips together. 

Jen lets a small smile show before shrugging. “It’s whatever, Pace.”

“No, it’s not. It was shitty of me to get mad at you for knowing me so well. You’re the only person, other than Gretchen, who’s ever stuck around. And we both know that she’d ditch me if it wasn’t for her Big Sister obligations,” Pacey attempts to joke before sighing, “I’m serious, Lindley. It doesn’t escape me how lucky I am to have you. You’re the reason I’ve even made it this far.”

Jen smiles for real now as she leans into him gently. “I’m lucky to have you, too. Even if you’re a dumbass.”

“Love you, too,” Pacey mumbles, kissing the top of her head as he puts an arm around her shoulders easily, "Does this mean I'm allowed to sit with you on the plane ride home?"

"Fine, but only so we can talk about how _hot_ Kristy Livingston got." Jen grins quietly.

Pacey can't help but scan the room in front of them, "Oh shit, is she here? I haven't seen her since graduation."

Jack had turned around to watch them as soon as Joey had given him the okay, and as he watches the two of them clearly make up, he can’t help but fist bump the air. “Yes! I knew it would work,” he gloats as he turns back to Joey with a grin. “And I didn’t even need to send in the  _ Pacey Whisperer _ to help out.”

Joey’s head whips around. “The Pacey what? Are you talking about  _ me _ ?” 

“Yep.”

“What does that even mean?”

“It means you’re our secret weapon and you can convince Pacey to do anything. We used to have Jen, but he had limitations with her we couldn’t get through.” Jack then lowers down to teasingly whisper into Joey’s ear, “I wonder  _ why  _ he does whatever  _ you  _ ask…”

Joey elbows Jack right in the ribs and he yelps dramatically, taking a few steps back due to the blow. She throws him a fake smile. “I don’t only whisper. I can hit, too. Does that convince  _ you  _ to shut up?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Jack croaks out.

She rolls her eyes as she helps him stand up straight again. “Stop it, you’re literally a football player.”

“I’m not wearing my shoulder pads!” he argues, still grimacing. 

* * *

Joey really wishes all of them weren’t so nice so they could finally leave. Grams had agreed to help the Witters clean up after everyone else but the immediate family had left, so naturally, her, Jack, and Jen also stayed behind. 

Jack and Jen were unfortunately faster than her and Pacey and managed to call dibs on cleaning out the food, which mostly meant Jack continuing to snack and Jen throwing away the paper cutlery. Joey instead follows Pacey down to his garage, apparently having to help him clean out some stuff from there before they leave for home tomorrow. 

“Please tell me you just want me here to look pretty and cheer you on,” Joey says with a small smile. She’s secretly glad they both get a moment to themselves again, away from all the madness and weird looks from all the people upstairs.

“Don’t worry, I’ll let you carry the light stuff. I moved most of the garbage last night, so it’s just small stuff,” Pacey explains, actually proud of the progress he’d made so far. He’d spent most of last night in the dimly lit garage, going through boxes of old Christmas decorations and some of his dad’s long forgotten trinkets. Pacey can’t remember a time when his dad did anything but work and drink beer on the couch, but apparently he used to spend a lot of time out here. 

Half of the space is over-run by his nieces outdoor toys, and the other half only consists of a few stacks of boxes. “Here,” He hands Joey an old shopping bag that’s full of old snow gear. Even his nieces had outgrown them by now, not to mention the fact that they were about twenty years old and have clearly been nibbled on by some stray mice.

Before Pacey can even pick up the heavy box at the top of the  _ Throw Away  _ pile, Doug makes his way into the garage, a bulky garbage bag in his hands. “Whoa, what the hell did you do out here?”

Pacey glances around, shrugging. “Mom asked me to clean out the garage.”

“Where’d you put all of dad’s old crap?” Doug asks suspiciously, glancing toward the bag in Joey’s hands. She simply hides it behind her back before he can really get a look, and throws him an innocent smile.

“Mostly on the shelves, but I donated a few pairs of old boots and threw some old VHS tapes away,” Pacey explains, picking up the box with a quiet grunt. 

As if on cue, his mother is behind Doug in the doorway, nudging past him and taking in the nearly spotless garage, “Where is everything?”

Before Pacey can say anything, Doug steps into the garage and starts opening boxes. “He threw things away.”

“What?! Why the hell would you throw your father’s things away?” Mrs. Witter’s tone is already way over the top, jumping right into anger. Joey can’t help but wince slightly, but she tries to keep herself together for Pacey’s sake.

“They weren’t his boots, they were mine and Doug’s from like, high school. Dad’s stuff is all on the shelves.” Pacey puts the heavy box back down with a huff.

“The VHS tapes were dad’s.” Doug accuses, adding fuel to the fire, like always.

“You threw away your father’s VHS tapes?”

“You haven’t owned a VCR in ten years, Mom, nobody has. They were old football games he recorded. I promise, I checked every label.” Pacey’s already giving up on this conversation. He knows where it’s going. This is always how it starts.

“I didn’t tell you to throw anything away, I told you to clean things up. I can’t believe you would do this,” Mrs. Witter raises her voice, fully stepping into the garage now. “Your father’s barely in the ground and you start dividing his stuff up as if you’re the one who’s even here to appreciate any of it.”

“Why don’t you just go out with your friends again, and let me salvage this?” Doug is still inspecting the boxes beside Pacey, always ready to micromanage. 

“You know, Dougie, I think we already hashed out that bullshit last night, so let it go,” Pacey argues, watching as Doug makes a grab for the bag in Joey’s hand. He attempts to take it from her coldly, but not without Joey fighting back and pushing him slightly as retaliation. 

Pacey steps between Doug and Joey, instantly protective over his roommate. “Doug, would you stop?! It’s garbage! It’s all garbage!”

Pacey’s mom ignores her eldest son’s immaturity and starts inspecting the neatly organized shelves, her tone condescending. “I never should have let you touch anything, I should’ve known you would do this. You just always have to make problems, Pacey.”

“Are you kidding me?!” Joey finally speaks up, not being able to keep herself quiet for any of their comfort anymore. 

“Jo,” Pacey warns quickly, his hand finding her shoulder. “It’s not worth it. Let’s just go home.”

“Yeah, great, Pacey. Screw things up and run away. It’s nice to know you turned out exactly how dad always imagined,” Doug mutters, going through the bag of old snow suits.

Pacey’s hand drops from Joey’s shoulder and he stares at his brother, who isn’t even giving him the time of day. “God, you’re such a miserable prick. ”

Without another word, Pacey storms back into the house, ready to grab his things from upstairs and go to Grams’ house like he has so many times in the past. He’s so angry he doesn’t even notice that Joey doesn’t follow him out. Instead, she barely takes one step before she absolutely can’t hold it in anymore --- especially after already witnessing all she has with Pacey today. She’s in awe of the fact that he could hold it together, but  _ she  _ certainly wasn’t gonna let them get away with this.

“You know what?” Joey whispers to herself, chuckling dryly. She turns around to face Doug and his mother, and she doesn’t even care if this was technically a wake. She  _ has  _ to say something. “You guys don’t deserve him.”

“Huh?” Doug says, finally realizing she didn’t leave yet. 

She finally locks eyes with him, and everything comes pouring out of her. “Doug, you’re an absolute awful brother,” she continues, a little louder so he can hear her better. “You’re the oldest, and you’re supposed to take care of the family, but for some reason you all decided that  _ Pacey  _ is supposed to bear the weight of everything. So you just add to it, probably to relieve yourself of every responsibility you know you  _ should  _ have. Pacey has done  _ everything  _ he possibly could from the second he got here --- even if it hurt him, even if he never even got a thank you, even if he and his dad had a complicated relationship. He flew all the way here and he helped put everything together, just for you guys to yell at him for the tiniest thing that doesn’t even matter! I know everyone’s fragile right now, but he’s  _ trying _ . He always has been, and he deserves better than all of you overlooking him.”

Doug is quick to shake his head. “Alright, I don’t know who you think you are ---”

His voice is threatening, but it’s not enough to scare her off. She simply matches his tone. “We met already. I’m Joey Potter. I’ve lived with your brother for less than six months now, and I already know that I will never find anyone kinder, or more supportive, or as incredible as him. Yet for some unknown reason, ever since we stepped foot into this city, he’s been feeling like shit because  _ you guys _ can’t see that. And I’m sorry, but that’s  _ your  _ fucking loss.” She’s breathless from the adrenaline this is all giving her, but she’s not even close to done. “You’re missing out. You really are, and I want you to know that. I have no idea how such ungrateful people like you managed to raise such a wonderful person, but it doesn’t matter. Because he’s right. He  _ does  _ have a home. With us. And we love the hell out of him. So you can keep trying to tear him down --- even though I obviously wish you would all dethaw your frozen hearts instead ---- but Pacey is  _ always  _ gonna have somewhere else to run to. Us.”

Mrs. Witter looks speechless, while Doug looks like he really wants to punch something. Joey can’t help but smile a little. 

“Anyways. I really am sorry for your loss,” she adds. “But I also hope I never have to see you guys again.” She sighs, finally emptied out of all her rage, and makes her way out of the garage before either of them can say anything else. 

She turns left to walk back into the house, and almost yelps when she comes face to face with Pacey. “Oh my god!” Joey gasps out. “I almost hit you!” She catches her breath before the realization of his presence finally hits. “Shit. How much did you hear?”

Pacey is so stunned, he can’t even process all of what Joey had said. It took him about 10 seconds after storming out to see through his blind anger and realize that Joey wasn’t behind him. When he doubled back, he could hear her yelling from down the hall. How the others inside haven’t come looking to check out the commotion, Pacey doesn’t know. But now, he’s face to face with Joey, hands out as if to catch her before running into him. Still in the midst of processing, Pacey shrugs. “I mean, I heard a lot. Are you okay? You’re breathing like you just ran a marathon.”

Joey actually chuckles, because only Pacey could make her laugh after all that. “I’m fine. I just haven’t been that angry in a long time,” she says. “I don’t think I’ll be welcome to visit your family anymore, though. Sorry.”

As the seconds pass, more and more of Joey’s words sink in and Pacey finds himself absolutely dumbfounded. Almost to the point of being speechless.  _ Almost.  _ “Why are you apologizing? It’s not like I’m coming back any time soon, and that was…” Pacey hopes his amazement is evident on his face, because he can’t quite find the words to describe how he’s feeling.

Joey simply shrugs before catching his eye. “Are  _ you  _ okay?” she finally asks. “I’m sor---” she catches herself. “You didn’t deserve that.”

“I’m fine, I just can’t believe you said all that.” Pacey practically whispers, glancing over her shoulder at the thought of his mom and Doug still being right on the other side of the doorway. But he doesn’t care. He looks back to Joey, wishing he could read her mind and understand  _ why  _ she would say all of those things about him. “Thank you.”

_ And Gretchen thought it would take him longer. _ Joey smiles to herself, then widens her grin as she looks back at Pacey. “You’re very welcome, Pace. I meant every word you heard.” 

They stand there just smiling to each other for a second before Joey finally huffs out one last sigh. “Let’s go home, shall we?” She takes his hand as he nods and leads him back to his  _ real _ family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> proud of y'all for making it thru this very long and very hard chapter <3


	8. Bathtub

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jen and Jack decide to get a bathtub for the loft.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi lovelies! alright, so it's gonna be pretty obvious throughout this chapter that this is pretty much filler/a bottle episode as they would say. we wrote a lot last chapter, and heavy stuff at that, so we took a break with this one and focused on something other than jacey because we love all our children and felt like they deserved some fun. :) it's pretty short and stupid, but trust us, we're setting stuff up for something pretty big hehehe. thank you for all the continued support on the series!

Jen motions for Jack and Joey to keep their heads down while she makes sure that Pacey is behind the bar like she was promised. Once she sees him, she grins, then motions for the three of them to run up to the bar like they previously discussed.

“ _Boo!_ ” The three of them scream, all in different octaves, as they pop up to scare their roommate.

Poor Pacey almost drops the glass he was working on cleaning, but thankfully he manages to keep his grip. “That would’ve come out of my paycheck, you children!” He rolls his eyes, but his roommates are all laughing so hard that he can’t help but let a little smile slip through.

“We’ll make sure to tip generously to make up for it,” Joey quips back, taking her seat at the bar. “I know someone who works here, though, so I’m actually hoping for a discount. But it’s been a while since I’ve seen him.”

Pacey rolls his eyes slightly at her dig at him. He’s basically been living at Adam’s place since they all came back from New York, and only comes back to the loft for new changes of clothes. Look, she gets it. They had to watch him go through the worst week of his life, and Joey especially learned a lot more about him than he probably ever intended. So of course he’d need space from it all, and time to himself. Well, and his boyfriend. She just wishes she didn’t miss him so much.

“You already used that on Valentine’s day. You need to come up with a new bit,” he teases back, and Joey wishes the mention of that bittersweet day didn’t make her wince a little. “What are you all doing here?”

“Jen wanted to discuss loft matters,” Jack answers, already reaching for the bowl of pretzels that they always have out for customers. “But since we never know when you’ll be around, we just decided to come here ourselves.”

“You guys _do_ realize I’m _working_ , right?” Pacey says with a sigh.

They all look around. There’s one other person there, a regular in his booth with a half-finished drink. They’re pretty sure he’s asleep. The three of them turn back to Pacey with raised brows.

“It’s a Tuesday day shift, Pace,” Jen points out. “I’m sure you’ll live. Besides, I have one word that is gonna change your life.”

“If it’s weed, I swear to god, Lindley,” Pacey warns. “We promised we’d never get high again after what happened last time.”

Jen shivers. “Please don’t remind me.”

“Wait, what happened last time you guys were high?” Joey asks with a curious raised brow.

Jack chuckles. “Think of the most embarrassing stupid thing you’ve ever done when you were high, and then multiply it by a thousand.”

Joey purses her lips. “I’ve never been high,” she admits, mumbling.

“ _What?!_ ” All three of her roommates yell in response.

“Oh my god, our little baby Joey is more baby than we ever thought,” Jen says with a pout as she caresses Joey’s face.

“Shut up!” She slaps Jen’s hands away. “I just… never knew where to get the… _Stuff_.”

“I bet you’d be either sleepy or highly anxious,” Jack proposes, truly deep in thought. “Guys, we need to do this. Jo can’t keep living her life like this.”

“Alright, I will put that away for future discussion,” Jen says, shaking her head to refocus. “But I was here to discuss something else.” She pauses dramatically, then, with a grin, says, “ _Bathtub_.”

Joey and Pacey manage to lock eyes, and both share a look of skepticism.

“Okay…?” Pacey says, putting his drying rag back on his shoulder. “What does this have to do with the loft?”

Jen groans. “Duh, I’m saying we should get a bathtub _in_ the loft.”

“Why?” he questions with an eye roll. “We have a shower. We wouldn’t even have space for it.”

“We could fit it if we tried hard enough,” Jen pleads. “ _Please_ , guys? I promise you’ll thank me once you’re sipping a drink with bubbles all around you, candles everywhere, soft jazz music playing after a long hard day…”

“That literally sounds horrible,” Pacey says with a shake of his head. “And it’s too expensive for something we’ll use maybe twice a month. Plus, and I reiterate, we already have a shower.”

“Sorry, Jen, I’m gonna have to agree with Pace,” Joey pipes up. “I never understood the appeal of just sitting there stewing in your own filth,” she says with a scrunched up face.

Jen gives her a frustrated groan. “You’re really gonna go with _Pacey_ on this? He’s never even home!”

“Hey, I still pay all the bills, thank you very much,” Pacey retorts with an accusing finger pointed at her. It was nice that the two of them had made up after that fight in New York and were finally getting along again and bickering like siblings, Joey thought. She didn’t want to think about how off everything would feel right now if they hadn’t.

“Jack, please back me up,” Jen pleads, turning to her best friend.

“Huh?” Jack looks up from his bowl of pretzels, pretty much already finished. “Oh, I don’t know.”

“Loft vote,” Pacey calls out and then despite Jen’s pleading pout, puts his hand up. “Nay.”

“Nay,” Joey agrees.

Jack simply nods slightly and then mumbles, “Nay…?”

“Boo! All of you!” Jen whines. “We should ask Audrey, since she practically lives there, too ---”

“We are _not_ asking your little friend with benefits,” Pacey cuts her off. “Besides, it wouldn’t change anything, anyway. The nays still have it.”

“You’re all dumb,” Jen pouts. “Not really, because I love you, but also I’m not kidding, and I won’t forget this betrayal.”

Joey rolls her eyes at her friend’s dramatics. “Witter, pour the girl a drink on me, please,” she says with a chuckle.

“Make it rosé, so I can pretend I’m enjoying it in the bathtub I can’t have,” Jen dramatically sighs.

Pacey ignores her quip and gets started on pouring her her usual vodka soda instead.

“Jen, wanna come pick a song on the jukebox with me?” Jack asks, getting up from his seat.

She instantly smiles at the thought, getting up to follow him over. “Yes, please! This place needs some cheering up, so I’m thinking Prince.”

“Sure, pick whatever you want,” Jack whispers as soon as they hit the jukebox. Jen raises an eyebrow, knowing all of her best friend’s tells by now. He was about to tell her something he didn’t want other people to know. Sure enough: “Look, I want that bathtub.”

Jen laughs instantly. “ _Ha!_ ” She yelps, and Jack is quick to shush her. “Shh, my ass! This means we’re at a tied vote and we’ll bring in an outsider to finalize it, which will be Audrey, and she’ll obviously agree. Agh, I knew I could count on you!” She squeezes his cheek excitedly.

“It’s a bathtub, Jen, of course I want one. There’s nothing better than a bath after a football game, or a long day helping kids remember the process of photosynthesis.”

“Well, then why did you say nay?” She questions with narrowed eyes.

Jack sighs. “I don’t know, peer pressure or something.”

“From Mr. I’m-Never-Home and Capeside’s Star Student? Tsk, tsk, Jack, you used to have tougher skin than this. Is Tobey making you soft?”

“Definitely. But that isn’t the point.” He lowers his voice again, and Jen loves that Jack thinks this is important enough for such secrecy. “Here’s what I’m thinking: Pacey is never home anyway, and Joey has finals coming up so she’s always off studying. We half the cost of the tub, and then it just magically shows up in the loft while the two of them aren’t home. They can’t say no then.”

Jen snickers, patting her best friend’s arm. “I love the way your mind works, Jackers. It sure is evil when it wants to be.”

He smirks. “You have no idea.”

* * *

Joey is actually home for a few hours before her planned trip to the school library, where she has to keep her nose in three different books for the night. She’s trying to enjoy herself by blasting some upbeat songs, but it’s just going in one ear and out the other. Jen and Jack are off doing God knows what, and Pacey is obviously not around either. For the first time since she’s moved into the loft, Joey feels kind of lonely.

Her music is playing so loudly that she doesn’t hear the knock on her bedroom door. She’s so into her thoughts that she actually jumps once she notices someone’s sitting on the edge of her bed and attempting to poke her leg.

“Oh my god!” Audrey yelps when Joey almost kicks her in the face. “Damn, Jo! I just wanted to say hi!”

Joey lets out an exasperated breath, throwing a pillow at her friend. “You scared the crap out of me!”

“It’s not _my_ fault you’re blasting Bruno Mars like a crazy person. It’s not 2015 anymore, sweetie,” Audrey teases, expertly catching the pillow. “Do we need to talk about it?”

“Talk about what?”

“Why you’re all alone in the loft laying in your bed and listening to _Uptown Funk?_ ”

“It’s a good song,” Joey mumbles, turning it off so she can properly hear her friend. “And there’s nothing to talk about. I was just enjoying the solitude.”

Audrey raises an eyebrow. “No, you weren’t.”

“What are you even doing here?”

“Jen asked me to meet her here to help her with something,” Audrey shrugs. “She’s not here yet, though, so you have me to dish out all your problems to. Come on. Spill. Is this about Pacey?”

Joey sighs at the name. Yes, of course it was about him, but she wasn’t gonna tell Audrey that. Her friend already had the upper hand by calling it after their fake dating wedding scenario, when Joey was too blind to see it. Besides, nothing had changed. Pacey was still in a relationship, now more into it than ever, seeing as he was constantly with Adam ever since they got back into town. He might as well have moved in with the guy.

“No,” Joey lies through her teeth. Just because they bonded in New York doesn’t mean Pacey was gonna be magically infatuated with her. She just offered support to a friend during a tough time. “There’s nothing wrong, Audrey. I promise. I’m just a little overwhelmed about finals, that’s all.”

“I don’t know why you always try to lie when you _know_ you suck at it,” the blonde teases through a shake of her head. “You know what you need? To _date_. Get your mind off of everything and finally move on from that oompa loompa.”

Joey bursts out laughing. “You _know_ Dawson hated being called that!”

“Oh, I know.”

Joey giggles again, then tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. “I can’t date right now, Audrey, I’m a mess. No guy is gonna want this.”

“The right guy will want you, mess and all.” Audrey places a supportive hand on Joey’s thigh. “We can go out tomorrow night if you want.”

“God, no. We need to wait till finals are over. Give me a good week.”

“Fine. But no more excuses after that.”

Joey sighs. Honestly, Audrey was probably right. It was no good for Joey to sulk around, waiting for a moment that may never come, a relationship that might not even work. She needed to stop getting caught up with people she was familiar with, yearning for relationships just because those people were close by. She needed to leave the nest, as Jack would probably say. She _was_ in her 20s after all, and she already wasted so much time being caught up with Dawson. She smiles at Audrey, nodding. “Deal.”

* * *

Jen and Jack had spent almost two hours at the nearest Lowe’s, arguing over which bathtub to get. They finally decided on one of the cheapest ones available, seeing as neither of them had had a proper job in months. Their heavy course loads and wild social circles always kept them too busy for anything more than odd jobs here and there whenever they could find it, so this was the best option they could both agree on. And even though it was the cheapest, they still didn’t have enough to afford helpers to bring it home, so now they were trudging that damn thing down ten blocks. Thank God it was LA, where people barely even glanced at them as they did so.

“Jack, I think I’m starting to regret this decision,” Jen says through huffs during one of their _catch your breath_ moments. “I want this thing real bad, but I did not know it would be this much work.”

Jack is much fitter than she is, but even _he’s_ struggling to hide his breathlessness. “Just think, we can relax all night on this baby once we’re done.”

“We better,” Jen mumbles. “I’m thinking that since Pacey and Joey aren’t helping us with this, they both owe us $10 per bath. Or at least some dinner.”

“Agreed. Now come on,” Jack nudges her, and Jen sighs dramatically before they continue their trek to the apartment.

“Did you already tell Audrey to meet us there?” Jack asks once they’re finally a block away.

“Yeah, and I asked her to make sure Joey was gone. She says she left like twenty minutes ago, so we should be fine.”

“How are things between you two, by the way?” Jack pries with a smirk.

Jen rolls her eyes. Or at least she tries to, because she’s really losing her breath again. “We’re fine. Nothing’s complicated yet, even though I know it will be soon, so I’m just trying to enjoy it while I can.”

“Do you like her?”

She motions for him to help her put the tub down so she can take a proper breath. “Of course I do. I’ve always liked her, I just didn’t know this was ever a possibility.”

“Well, do you still like Gretchen?”

“This is _so_ not the time for a deep talk, Jack.”

“Hey, just trying to be a good friend here,” he defends with a shrug. “I just wanna make sure that you’re happy. And that you’re not hurting other people or yourself.”

Jen runs a hand through her hair, annoyed that it’s much sweatier than she thought. “I know. Trust me, that’s all I think about, all the time.”

Jack walks over to place a kiss on her cheek. “I’m here if you need me, that’s all.”

“Love you,” Jen says as casually as always, reaching for his hand to squeeze it. “Alright, let’s get this sucker to its new home before I give up completely and just bathe right here in the street.”

They finally make it to their building, yet, as luck would have it, today _happened_ to be a day where their elevator broke.

“You have got to be kidding me,” Jen groans. “That’s it. Don’t tell Grams I said this, but God is real and right now he is telling us we made the wrong decision.”

“It’s just four flights of stairs, Jen,” Jack tries to be optimistic. “We can do it. Come on!”

“No, no,” Jen retaliates. “See, _you_ can say that because you’ve always been athletic and you’ve been training under these insane circumstances for years. Meanwhile, I was _forced_ to be head cheerleader in high school, and that only lasted about a month anyways, where I didn’t do much but be bitter. I have never been the sporty type, Jack, and this is the most I have ever done and it’s all for this stupid bathtub that I got as an idea while drunk and watching HGTV at two in the morning!”

Jack simply lifts an eyebrow, not phased in the slightest. “Alright, you good?”

Jen sighs, catching her breath after her long rant. “Yeah, okay. Let’s go.”

It takes them about twenty minutes to get through those four flights of stairs, mostly because it’s thin hallways and a thick tub. Audrey opens the loft door for them when they knock, breathless and sweating.

“Oh my god. _This_ is what you’ve been doing?” she asks, eyes wide at the sight.

“We’ve made worse decisions,” Jack shrugs, going straight to the fridge.

“I think this might be top three. Depends on how it ends,” Jen says as she catches a water bottle he throws at her.

Jack gulps down the whole bottle in record time before waving her off. “It’ll end in a bath, Jen. No other possible outcome.”

“Um…” Audrey says with a grimace. “Are you guys sure this thing is gonna fit in your bathroom? It’s kind of… _Big_.”

“What do you mean?” Jack questions. “Of course it will.”

But Jen isn’t as much of an optimist, so she’s quick to look back and forth. In a panicked voice, she practically groans, “I think Audrey is right, Jack…” She brings her hand to her face, annoyed. “Oh my god, we were so caught up in the excitement and thrill of doing something stupid that we didn’t even think this shit through!”

“It’ll be fine!” Jack assures her, motioning for Audrey to help him out this time to give his stressed friend a break. Audrey pouts childishly but gives in for Jen’s sake. “Just follow my lead, Liddel.”

“I really feel like I should have been warned about this. I was under the impression I was here for sex,” she mumbles under her breath, and Jack just pretends he didn’t hear her.

It unfortunately doesn’t take long for Jack to see that Audrey may have actually been right. The tub is too wide to fit in their tiny doorway. “Maybe we can try to hold it diagonally?” he asks, trying not to lose his optimism.

Audrey follows his instructions, though Jen has to get up and help her hold the tub steady at their desired angle. It still doesn’t fit. In fact, when Jack tries to help force it through, they end up with a pretty noticeable _dent_ on the bathroom door.

“Shit!” Jen exclaims. She makes Jack and Audrey help her put the tub down in the living room again, completely giving up. “Oh my god, Pacey and Joey are gonna kill us.”

“They’ll never notice that, don’t worry,” Jack assures her, but he’s pretty annoyed, too. “I can’t believe we forgot to measure the door before we chose a tub.”

Audrey plops down on their couch, huffing from her ten minutes of work. “So… no tub, then?”

“Ugh,” Jen groans as she takes a seat beside Audrey on the couch. “What the hell are we gonna do, Jack? I’m not carrying that thing for another ten blocks.”

“We have to if we wanna get our money back,” he sighs, running a tired hand through his face.

“Can’t we just put it somewhere else in the loft?” Jen questions. “We could fit it in your room, since it’s the biggest. It’ll be like your Animal Crossing villagers’ houses.”

Jack can't help but chuckle. “Well, Jen, we unfortunately do not live on my island. We’d need pipes and stuff in there and I don’t think it’d be any easier.”

Audrey props her feet up on their coffee table. “I can’t believe you guys even went through all of this. You two know that I have a tub at _my_ place, right? You could just ask to use it.”

“What?!” Jack exclaims. “That would have been nice to know, _Jen!_ ”

Jen’s eyes widen instantly. “Oh my god, you totally do. I’ve been in your bathroom. How the hell did I forget this?”

Audrey laughs, petting Jen’s head lovingly. “You’re a little daft sometimes, babe.”

“To put it lightly,” Jack teases under his breath.

“So what are we gonna do with _this_ thing?” Jen asks, motioning her head towards the tub currently in their living room.

“I’ll call movers for you guys tomorrow,” Audrey answers easily. “I don’t know what you wanna do with it until then, though.”

Jen gets up from her seat, motioning for Audrey to follow her lead. “I think we can discuss it over milkshakes. We deserve them.” She didn’t even want to think about moving that thing again, because they’ll definitely have to leave it in Jack’s room for the night. All she wanted right now was some cold sweet drink and peace of mind.

“Finally, a good idea,” Jack agrees instantly, already opening the loft door. “But I am _definitely_ stopping by your house tonight and using that tub, Audrey.”

The blonde chuckles. “Anytime, babe. My door is always open for all your bubble bath needs.”

He puts his arm around her shoulders with a grin. “I think you may officially be a 4D dumbass.”

“Aw!” Audrey says with a smile. “I’m touched. I think _you two_ need to put money in that jar, though. Because all of this was stupid.”

“We could, or I could use that money to buy an extra milkshake,” Jack argues.

Audrey nods, grinning. “I’ll allow it.”

* * *

The next morning, Joey grabs her bathroom caddy from her dresser and heads down the hall. The loft is quiet, which used to feel strange to her, but lately it’s been the norm. No amount of studying could distract Joey from how empty the loft feels without Pacey. She hears water running as she approaches the bathroom and is ready to fight with Jack over shelf space, but when she enters the room she’s shocked to see a different brunette. Pacey’s back is to her as he runs a hand through his messy hair.

He glances up at the mirror and sees her, smiling as he greets her. “Oh, hey, Potter.”

She stops in her tracks, blinking a few times to make sure she was seeing correctly, then shaking her head to make sure she wasn’t still sleeping. “Uh, hey, Witter,” she mumbles.

Pacey laughs, still looking at her through the mirror. “You okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost or something.”

His teasing brings an instant familiar smile out of her. “Well, I might as well have,” she quips back easily.

“Ha ha, very funny,” Pacey rolls his eyes, “You can come in, y’know? I mean unless you’re--” He starts to gesture toward the shower but then furrows his brow at something. “Are you wearing my shirt?”

“I’m not showering, don’t worry ---” Her voice overlaps his with an awkward chuckle, until his next question makes her clear her throat and get herself together. She looks down at the old shirt, with a worn New York Queens logo on it, and chuckles, a little embarrassed as it all clicks. “Shit, maybe?” Joey says with an innocent smile. “Sorry, I guess our laundry got mixed up and I haven’t been the most attentive person lately, unless it comes to memorizing old Charles Dickens quotes.”

Pacey nods slowly, eyes seeming to linger for a moment too long. “Right, you’re studying for finals already. You’re the only person I know that doesn’t just cram at the end of the semester.”

Joey finally properly steps into the bathroom, setting her caddy down at the sink. “Well, I gotta make good use of that scholarship money, Witter.” She takes out her toothbrush and wordlessly asks him if she can use one of the sinks. “Why are _you_ here? Did you need a change of clothes, finally?” She teases, eyes looking down at his T-Birds shirt, a joke gift she bought for him in New York before they left thanks to the new knowledge of his theatre kid history. He’d groaned dramatically when she gave it to him before boarding the plane home, but she knows he still appreciated the gag sentiment.

Pacey glances down, rolling his eyes again as he steps aside a little to give her space. “Yeah, Adam’s place doesn’t have a washer dryer,” he explains before pointing to her caddy. “Can I borrow some toothpaste?”

She gives him an unimpressed look, but still uncaps her toothpaste for him. “You really need to invest in your dental hygiene. You can’t mooch off of us forever, Pace.”

“Oh, trust me, I can. I’m a very good moocher. Just ask Adam,” he jokes, hesitating before holding his toothbrush out to Joey. “Don’t worry, I’ll invest in some toothpaste before my next laundry day.”

“Don’t think I don’t know that that’s a month away,” she teases, rolling her eyes as she puts some toothpaste on her lazy roommate’s toothbrush before putting some onto her own. She’s overly aware that his eyes are on her, so she hyper focuses on the task. They haven’t really done anything this… intimate since New York. Not that sharing toothpaste was a step away from marriage or anything, and they’ve done this before, countless times, but… Something about barely seeing him around anymore makes this heavier for her. Joey clears her throat again, not wanting to spiral before it’s even noon. She caps her toothpaste before finally looking up at him, catching his usual grin.

Pacey’s smile comes at a price, though, as always. “Aw, do you _miss me_ , Jo?”

Her brows instantly shoot up at the question, not expecting it to come out of his mouth. Of course she did, and he had to know that. But she always assumed these kinds of deeper things between them were unspoken, always hidden but always present under the guise of endless teasing and easy back and forth. But then again, maybe the question was just that --- another attempt at teasing her. So she just scoffs. “What? You mean do I wish you were still around everyday stinking the place of booze and screaming at the TV when your team doesn’t score a home run? You wish.”

Pacey rolls his eyes, brushing his teeth in silence. Joey swears she catches him looking at her in the mirror, but he drops his eyes down to avoid her gaze and spits out some toothpaste. When he lifts his head up again, it’s his turn to catch Joey looking at him and he lets out a quiet laugh. And for a long moment, Pacey and Joey simply smile at each other through the mirror, their brushing pace unknowingly matching the other's.

Joey misses these stupid these little moments the most.

She spits out her toothpaste and then washes out her toothbrush, shaking her head at the situation. “You, um… Are you doing okay?” she asks, not knowing what else to say.

Pacey turns to Joey with a furrowed brow, toothbrush hanging out of his mouth lazily. “Hm?” he mumbles before removing his toothbrush, talking through the foamy toothpaste in his mouth. “Yeah, I’m fine. You?” he shrugs easily.

“Right,” she says with a nod. “Yeah, I’m good. If I pass these finals I’ll be _really_ good.” This felt off, but she couldn’t figure out why.

“You’ll be a college graduate,” Pacey corrects her before spitting out his toothpaste. “That must be really exciting.”

“It would be if I had any idea of what I’m gonna do next,” she admits through a snicker. She reaches for her moisturizer, keeping her eyes off of him.

Pacey leans down and turns on the cold water, drinking right from the faucet to rinse out the rest of his toothpaste. As he stands up straight again, he gives her a strange look through the mirror, like he’s trying to read her mind or something. Finally, he shrugs. “You’ll be fine, Potter. If I can hold a job then you can do anything.”

Despite shaking her head in disagreement, she still laughs. “Thanks, Pace. We’ll see, I guess. If all else fails, you’ll teach me to bartend, right?”

Now Pacey is the one who averts his eyes away from her. He nods. “Yeah, Jo, I’ll teach you how to bartend.” He lets out a gentle laugh. “I’m gonna go get started on my laundry. I’ll try not to disturb your studying.”

“Thanks,” she says with a smile as she watches him walk away. She feels like she should say more, but everything gets caught in her throat.

She watches through the mirror as Pacey stops in the doorway, tilting his head slightly. “Hey, Jo?” He turns to her and points to a large dent on the bathroom door. “Has this _dent_ always been here?”


End file.
